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Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? - Family - Nairaland

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Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Rukemi291(f): 6:27pm On Nov 03, 2012
It baffles me that a parent can actually stoop so low as to curse his/her children, no matter the level of anger.

I was in my neighbour's house some weeks back and d teenage son did something so flimsy (to me), to my greatest surprise, the father from his end shouted 'oriedaru ni? (are u crazy?)' and the mum from her own end said 'orien fa eponi? (is your head siphoning petrol?)'.

I was shocked but couldn't mutter a word.

A lot of parents do this and i think it's so wrong. Don't these kind of things affect children psychologically?

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by k2039(m): 7:05pm On Nov 03, 2012
Verbal abuse.

The parents were abused by their own parents.
The problem is not that they were abuse but their failure to learn from their own parent.
So they inturn abuse their own children

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by ayobase(m): 7:06pm On Nov 03, 2012
Its simply illiteracy!

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by mhojiee(f): 8:14pm On Nov 03, 2012
undecidedProbably they don't know †ђε̲̣ spiritual implications
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by a1solution: 8:47pm On Nov 03, 2012
Rukemi291: It baffles me that a parent can actually stoop so low as to curse his/her children, no matter the level of anger.

I was in my neighbour's house some weeks back and d teenage son did something so flimsy (to me), to my greatest surprise, the father from his end shouted 'oriedaru ni? (are u crazy?)' and the mum from her own end said 'orien fa eponi? (is your head siphoning petrol?)'.

I was shocked but couldn't mutter a word.

A lot of parents do this and i think it's so wrong. Don't these kind of things affect children psychologically?
nothing wrong in using those words to correct a child. The bad one is when you lay curse on a child.

3 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by donedy: 8:49pm On Nov 03, 2012
There is nothing wrong with it. You guys should stop displaying or instigating your own idiosyncratic thinking on others. The father or mother will still hug the kid and even prepare meal for him. I'm think what you said actually happened to you.
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by gbemies: 8:49pm On Nov 03, 2012
nt al parents do dat.bt som parent realy nid dere mouths 2 b seived.
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by manny4life(m): 8:49pm On Nov 03, 2012
a1solution: nothing wrong in using those words to correct a child. The bad one is when you lay curse on a child.

Both are WRONG.

Let's not dance and sing it in a different tone... Both are WRONG, and should be condemned


@Topic, people do so because they lack the correct way to discipline the child. You can't blame them because that's how they learned.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by mama-gee(f): 8:56pm On Nov 03, 2012
Cause they don't see any wrong in it. . .
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by olu4life(m): 9:04pm On Nov 03, 2012
mama gee has said it all. To crown it all some of these parents are literates and nt illiterates. U can confirm that from lecturers yabbin students. Its a norm in d society but my parent never used those vulgar languages. The only thing i grew up with is callin u silly and thats when u really provoke them
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by greatgod2012(f): 9:04pm On Nov 03, 2012
Our children should be corrected and disciplined in love, with love, by love and through love, so dt they grow up to love themselves and others, when we want to correct a child and we do it in an abusive manner, d child grows up to think dt is d right way to do it, so we should try as parents to lay good examples to them thru our words and actions. We parents are d first and most important teachers of these children.
May God help us all........amen.

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Tolaaaaannni(f): 9:14pm On Nov 03, 2012
Because they are ignorant, and don't know the harms and effect that can have on a child.
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by seedord247(m): 9:16pm On Nov 03, 2012
I think yoruba folks do. shocked
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Nobody: 9:17pm On Nov 03, 2012
It is a very abusive society, verbal and emotional, we are not patient to speak to we prefer to insult or beat, a child is wrong, take time and talk with the child, why did you do this? This is why you shouldnt do this, what did you learn from our talk or worse case your punishment? Why wont you repeat this action next time?
Instead, we scream and curse, child goes out looks for someone weaker, the least disagreement turns to curses, conductor who has been cursed by his parents and maybe wife comes and curses out the car owner, car owner too has his hand read for "Uwa ka" and "God punish you" for anyone who doesnt do what he wants, I get insulted for actually waiting at traffic lights because the car owners behind feel the road is free so why obey traffic light.
I get insulted when i slow down at a junction so the long line of cars waiting to turn or to enter can enter, the ones coming straight feel they must always speed off and have the right of way and those turning have to wait till all the cars coming straight are finished.
Employer curses employee especially in one man business, Man and woman curse security man call him slow, dumb, foolish, , househelps are wicked, possessed witches, house help curses madam behind her back.
Couple get married and curse each other out, simple disagreements that can be silently solved but because they have both not been equiped with problem solving skills rather cursing galore each goes on cursing and cursing abusing the weakness of the other and a small issue becomes a major one sometimes with broken bottles.
Those who dont curse are then called "mumu, slow, wawa. etc, It seems to be smart in our society you must have thhe ability to curse and lash out on cue

5 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by beauty????(f): 9:18pm On Nov 03, 2012
Its not good atall. What is bad is BAD. U can correct ur child without those heavy abuses. Rukemi291, am right behind u
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Orikinla(m): 9:20pm On Nov 03, 2012
Only poorly educated parents do so.
It is most common among parents in the ghettos, because of their frustrations and depressions.
But unfortunately, they have only done more harm than good by cursing their children.
No wonder majority of them end up poor or even poorer than their parents.


The tongue has the power of life and death,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.


~ Proverbs 18:21 (New International Version)

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Bellonoah: 9:23pm On Nov 03, 2012
I wonder o undecided..i won't spare any parent caught in d despicable act,wil sue him/her..arrant nonsense!!!
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Nobody: 9:25pm On Nov 03, 2012
Orikinla: Only poorly educated parents do so.
It is most common among parents in the ghettos, because of their frustrations and depressions.
But unfortunately, they have only done more harm than good by cursing their children.
No wonder majority of them end up poor or even poorer than their parents.


The tongue has the power of life and death,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.


~ Proverbs 18:21 (New International Version)
Not entirely true that only poor parents curse, the huge fences may not allow us to hear what rich parents say and do but I know they can be just as insultive. Mental torture and verbal abuse, they seek and love total control, dare to go out of line and you go hear am. besides some use drugs and abuse alcohol, they can give a conductor run for his money, Femi Fani Kayode for example this is a facebook exchange between him and a facebook "friend"
This verbal exchange in gutter language between FFK and a certain citizen Ibrahim Mohammed of the net confirms the hypothesis.

Take a look at this excerpt from the exchange of missiles between the duo:

Ibrahim Mohammed: It is joblessness that is your problem. You slowpoke.

Femi Fani Kayode: Who needs a job, you or me? I have many like you begging for crumbs at my feet and my gates every day. It is you and your goat bleeping father that is jobless. Dirty Boko Haram animal like you. You are not fit to be served as meat for my dogs. You and your whole frigging family, now Bleep off and move to Saudi Arabia or Afghanistan or somewhere like that. Nigeria despises your murderous parasitic type. Olori buruku. Banza.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by donedy: 9:29pm On Nov 03, 2012
Orikinla: Only poorly educated parents do so.
It is most common among parents in the ghettos, because of their frustrations and depressions.
But unfortunately, they have only done more harm than good by cursing their children.
No wonder majority of them end up poor or even poorer than their parents.


The tongue has the power of life and death,
and those who love it will eat its fruit.


~ Proverbs 18:21 (New International Version)

Any level delusion. My parents are way more educated than you and they use all means to discipline their kids, and I'm glad they did. All that matters is that parental love.
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Bambela(m): 9:30pm On Nov 03, 2012
This reminded me of the cause of low self-esteem which many of us have argued today. It is never good to use abusive word of any kind as a corrective measure as they tend to affect the child negatively. The worst is laying curse on him by saying that his own child shall do him back.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Sagytarius(m): 9:30pm On Nov 03, 2012
To flog pikin, una complain. Ok, no cain, dem yab am; Una still complain. Wetin una wan make dem do na?
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Sagytarius(m): 9:32pm On Nov 03, 2012
Rukemi291: ... and the mum from her own end said 'orien fa eponi? (is your head siphoning petrol?)'.
grin Seriously, this got me ROTFLMFAO grin

2 Likes

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Rukemi291(f): 9:38pm On Nov 03, 2012
I can't believe some people said nothing is wrong with it... shocked. Children are so permeable, they act out what they are trained with.

Btw, these my neighbours are neither illiterates nor poverty striken.

@Debrief. SMH for FFK...
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Bambela(m): 9:38pm On Nov 03, 2012
Sagytarius: To flog pikin, una complain. Ok, no cain, dem yab am; Una still complain. Wetin una wan make dem do na?

Dis one pass yabbing
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by carefreewannabe(f): 9:43pm On Nov 03, 2012
I feel so delighted that many people here have shown that they are perfectly aware of how to bring up a child properly without insults and stuff like that.
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by carefreewannabe(f): 9:43pm On Nov 03, 2012
Bambela: This reminded me of the cause of low self-esteem which many of us have argued today. It is never good to use abusive word of any kind as a corrective measure as they tend to affect the child negatively. The worst is laying curse on him by saying that his own child shall do him back.

like

I was thinking something similar.
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by yemmy19(m): 10:08pm On Nov 03, 2012
Poverty,illiteracy aπϑ culture
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by davidylan(m): 10:20pm On Nov 03, 2012
ayobase: Its simply illiteracy!

you'd be shocked how many "literate" parents do this. It is simply down to too many parents lacking the required skills for raising kids.

1 Like

Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by torhuke(m): 11:17pm On Nov 03, 2012
It dependz on d mindset. Som parentz see it as normal & inefectv. D same parent who curse his/her child wil climb mountainz to pray 4 d child if d child has problemz. Xo if u call yr child-ediot or say ur silly 4 doin ds & ur a fool 4 doing dat- does dt really mean u want d child to be a fool? Itz also a correctv measure. If u call a child a fool 4 doin ds, dt child may nt do same again so as not to be called a fool. It does nt imply dt d parent wantz d child to be a fool. Insultz are difrent frm curses. d mother who said ''ori e fa eponi'' must av been dsmayd @ a particular act of d child & wx only scoldin d child dat way.. Datz no curse plz and dey av no spiritual implicationz
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by ayobase(m): 11:51pm On Nov 03, 2012
seedord247: I think yoruba folks do. shocked

How r u gonna react if called f00l...must u pple always?
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by ayobase(m): 11:54pm On Nov 03, 2012
davidylan:

you'd be shocked how many "literate" parents do this. It is simply down to too many parents lacking the required skills for raising kids.

I can still deduce ''illiteracy'' from ur point.
.
Of course, we have eduacted illeterates!
They wont if they know what they are doing!
Re: Why Do Some Parents Insult Their Children? by Feraz(m): 12:16am On Nov 04, 2012
Rukemi291: 'orien fa eponi? (is your head siphoning petrol?)'

LWKMD!!!!!

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