Pls consider the medical aspect of it,check whether there is a medical condition she is going through hidden from your family knowledge.

In addition I think u shud ivite her over to ur place and try bonding with her. Use ur space time take her out and it will loseen her alitle ask her what her plans for the year is and ask her if u can hellp out. When together engage her in motivational coversation with all these she ll eventually convide in u. Don't forget to spoce all these up with prayer

another point is that she might just be ranting

anybody that reads my diary will think d same, cos its filled with all sorts of rants, when am sad or depressed. i just start writing and pourin out my mind especially when i was a teen.

but realy that was all they were rant, i neva carried any of my threats into real life.

so op, she might also just be writing out what she knows she will neva do

Dude..Why dnt u call ur sista up and sit her down in a cool spot and calm area.. Talk to her lyk ur blood. Dnt be worry because u read her private note. Is only GOD dat knws d best why u sw it. I believe GOD is able.. I knw she ll answer nd change gud dnt be worry jst kip tinz calm nd always prayer and take her out nt to feel lonely @ hme.

I think ur sister just found out that shes attracted to girls and is feeling depressed that she wnt be acceptd.

first of all you can start by spending more time with her. Clear your schedule and take her to a place where you can both talk. Try to be close with her from now on. I think doing this with time you can now ask her personal questions

@ OP it is well,I think u hav gotn d best of advice somwer btw d 1st 5-6 comments until dos stupid low life derailers came on board..I hp dey neva get to face such challenges buh den dts d best way to shut a mouth deviod of control..I pray God grants u d strength nd wisdom 2 handle dis nd dat ur sista is psychologically well again..cheers

I had a similar experience with my immediate younger sister. Hers was that her self esteem plummetted to the extent that she went batty and slightly mad. I never knew that self esteem issues could cause pains, headache and what have you.
She was taken to psychiatric hospitals and put on psychoanalysis.
Also, some people in the church then found out about her condition, they came closer and started showing her love.
It was then that I found out that she lacked love from the family as my mother and other older siblings would always chide, bark and yell at her even unreasonably. To my mother and others, she was a never-do-well and a black sheep.
I then took it upon myself, to love and dote on her unconditionally. I bridged the gap in our age. I let go of the fact that I was her elder brother.
She returned to normalcy and started adjusting and is doing fine now.
SERIOUSLY, parents should avoid comparisons and show love to their kids.
Elderly ones should join suit as it is not good at all times to be bossy with the air of seniority.
So just start showing love to her, buy her gifts occasionally.
Among all human desires, the desire to be loved is supreme and indispensable as no human being can live without love.
The knowledge that someones appreciates and cares about you makes you want to live or else you would be contemplating suide.

Gud luck!

So just start showing love to her, buy her gifts occasionally.
Among all human desires, the desire to be loved is supreme and indispensable as no human being can live without love.
The knowledge that someones appreciates and cares about you makes you want to live or else you would be contemplating suide.

Gud luck!

[quote author=Okija_juju][/quote]mara ife na,this is a serious thread abeg

Op

Stationing this issue here wouldn't solve your problem rather than worsen it, assuming the sister in question happen to be a Nairalander and, discover her mission is no longer a secret the next thing to do should be finding the suit place and fulfill her mission, as I am typing this post who knows the condition of the sister? May God have mercy on our Souls.

@OP, i don't see any rzon yet why u shld be thinking dt her friend is her problem. For all u know, it mite even be d friend dt is using her little brain to keep her going since she's probably d only one she can open to. I think the major problem is herself and d parents aren't helping either. She probably mite just av found out dt she's into girls and doesn't know how to come out openly. U also talked about the issue of weight, dt cld be it also. I think the only thing you can do rite now is to move closer to her and try to get the reason for her depression out of her, then, try to encourage her that all is well. But you have to be very careful about the way you go about it cos if she's very smart lyk me , she's gonna suspect that u went through her diary and dt wldn't help matters either. On the other hand, you can just come out clean to her dt u mistakenly stumbled on her diary nd dt u're very sorry abt it but u'll luv to talk abt wot u saw inside. U av to mean the apologies sha nd assure her dt her secrets are safe with you. I hope God helps you, but 4get dt tin, she'z nt commiting any suicide. If it is dt easy, trust me, almost all teenagers wld be dead on d street.

Don't tell her u read her diary,she would hate u.tell her u have been having constant dream about her committing suicide.

your sister wants to commit sucide and u're worried about what she'll think if she finds out u read her diary??

Ortis: We are over 150million peepz in nigeria fight tru d buzzle n struggle of life bt if ur nasty little sis tinks SUCIDE is d answer 2 her small little poo poo shit problem...dem let her b n i wil b happy becos d population wil go down 2 149,999,000 peepz i guz,...datz a gud news n pls email me her burial date

Are you aware that it is the spirit of the devil that made you make the comment above?

You better change so the devil will quit using you as a vessel to propagate hate and wickedness.

You owe OP an apology. Start from there.

Suicide isn't an easy thing to commit.

Although you need to worry about the risk of her committing/ attempting suicide, but you need to focus MORE on changing her mood, and giving her a reason not to self harm.

She probably feels like committing suicide because she sees it as an easy way out to relief her burden. So you need to look for ways to ease those burdens, since you know her best more than any of us.

Invite her to visit your house, so she can experience a new (non-judgemental, non-imposing) environment. She needs to clear her head and re-focus.

Whatever you do, don't try and discourage her from seeing her female friend. It will only push her away further. Is there a chance that those two could be dating?! Being homosèxual is something greatly frowned upon and not easily accepted in Black societies so her sèxual orientation might be adding to her burdens.

Being bullied/ teased as you've mentioned can also still affect an individual even when they are no more experiencing bullying. So you might need to ask her (when she's comfortable/ ready to opening up to you) about what she was bullied about, and try to work on those issues together so that her self-esteem can increase. If she was bullied about having body odour (eeek -__-), encourage her to keep on top of her personal hygiene routine, so that she can regain her self confidence and never have to worry about being a smelly girl anymore

Since you mentioned that her weight is an issue, then help her to do something about it. Get a gym membership for you and her, call it 'bonding time'. Don't be too imposing though, if she don't want to work-out, let her be. Don't tell her to go on a diet either. If you adopt a healthier lifestyle, she might model your behaviour.... If she's around you often.

Try and involve her in a new activity/ hobby, or motivate her to participate in things that she had often enjoyed but had stopped doing. Things that had once made her happy.

If your parents are the nagging types, don't involve them in this for now.

If she doesn't confide in you about her depressive feelings, then you might have to let her know that you've invaded her privacy. Get her to open up to you... When she's ready. Don't force her!! Then reassure her of your love and support. See a counsellor if need be.
Most depressed people feel alone, and think no one will understand what they are going through. Prove her wrong.


Although I've previously advised you not to involve your parents, but you might need to advise them of how their 'upbringing style' can impact on their kids life. Too much aggro and not enough love isn't beneficial. Don't bring your sister's depressive mood state into this. I assume you're an adult, so have a grown up conversation with them.

not cool

That was a bloody essay (what I wrote).

Forgive me

Okija_juju:


Whats serious about this thread?!

If the guys sister was really in danger of comitting suicide, do you really believe that he would be online blogging it?!

yes you have a point there,how can the o.p's house be on fire and he's busy playing ps3
o.p go get a life

Bros, you have serious matter to deal with but, I pray that you will overcome it and come back to testify here.
My advice to you on this matter now is that, your sister needs you now. Please, don't tell her you read her diary and don't inform your parents as well as this will aggravate the whole thing.
Try and find any possible way to be close to your sister and ask her if there is anything bordering her which she may like to share with you. You must bear in mind that, she will never tell you about her suicide mission but with much LOVE and AFFECTIONS you will show her, she may open up to you one day.
Again, try and get the her bad influence friend of hers of her back. This will go long way for her attention to be shifted thereby stabilizing her planned suicide mission somehow. In all of this, please, don't give up on her and never make her feel to be rejected or left alone. This is my advice. Thank you.

abiL: That was a bloody essay (what I wrote).

Forgive me

.....u got me almost crack my rib...i just stroll pass ur epistle i was like WTF...

I think that girl should be arrested for conspiracy to committ suicide.

Tobbylobar: .....u got me almost crack my rib...i just stroll pass ur epistle i was like WTF...

You better stroll back UP and enlighten yourself!

 think she must н̲̣̣̣̥ά̲̣̥υ̲̣̥ε̲̣̣̣̥ gotten herself invoved in something bad...which makes her very depressed Ω̴̩̩̩̥ validates her belief that she is d black sheep of the family. ♥ all d way thou-u н̲̣̣̣̥ά̲̣̥υ̲̣̥ε̲̣̣̣̥ to make her know u ♥ her Ω̴̩̩̩̥ would always b by her. Moreso,tk her to Ơ̴̴̴̴͡.̮Ơ̴͡ nice Ω̴̩̩̩̥ interesting places plus get her invoved in church Activities. JƱ$τ̲̅ said a prayer 4 her Ω̴̩̩̩̥ i kno she wuld b aiit.

Ortis: We are over 150million peepz in nigeria fight tru d buzzle n struggle of life bt if ur nasty little sis tinks SUCIDE is d answer 2 her small little poo poo shit problem...dem let her b n i wil b happy becos d population wil go down 2 149,999,000 peepz i guz,...datz a gud news n pls email me her burial date

This is way out of line; totally uncalled for. Black_Panther25, please ignore this post.

Let your parents know, they would be matured enough to handle it and they would be mindful of saying hurtful and insensitive things to her.
They may be strict but loosing a child is a different thing entirely even for a stone heart.
They would show are move encouragement and attention if they know the seriousness of her situation.
It goes without saying that I don't expect them to tell her about the diary.

I've there,, the reason why we write down things we want to do on a book is because we cant do them,,atleast not without loads of encouragement and zeal,, thats more reason why there are more fictional books than non fictions,,
on a more subjective note, the girl's age is not mentioned so as to know how her brain can't function as according to her experiences in life, and as a younger sister to you, you exert some influence on her so talk to her in a diplomatic way(I can help), ***still cant beleive I gave out a solution without payment attached to it***

TOPIC TAGS
Boko Haram, Nigeria, Opinions
IT IS not known if the word “dysfunctional” was invented specifically to describe the Nigerian state – several other candidates also come to mind – but the word certainly fills the bill. The political institutions of Africa’s biggest country are incapable of dealing with even the smallest challenge. Indeed, they often make matters worse. Consider, for example, the way that the Nigerian government has dealt with the Islamist terrorists of Boko Haram.
Or rather, how it has failed to deal with them. Boko Haram (the phrase means ‘Western education is sinful’) began as a loony but not very dangerous group in the northern state of Bornu who rejected everything that they perceived as “Western” science. In a BBC interview in 2009 its founder, Mohammed Yusuf, claimed that the concept of a spherical Earth is against Islamic teaching. He also denied that rain came from water evaporated by the sun.
Bornu is a very poor state, however, and his preaching gave him enough of a following among the poor and ignorant to make him a political threat to the established order. So hundreds of his followers were killed in a massive military and police attack on the movement in 2009, and Mohammed Yusuf himself was murdered while in police custody. That was what triggered Boko Haram’s terrorist campaign.
Its attacks grew rapidly: by early 2012 Boko Haram had killed 700 people in dozens of attacks against military, police, government and media organisations and against the Christian minorities living in northern Nigeria. So last March Nigeria’s president, Goodluck Jonathan, promised that the security forces would end the insurgency by June. But the death toll just kept climbing.
In September, a senior official told The Guardian newspaper that “There is no sense that the government has a real grip. The situation is not remotely under control.” Last week alone saw six people dead in an attack on a church on Christmas Day, seven killed in Maiduguri, the capital of Bornu state, on 27 December, and the abduction and murder of fifteen Christians, mostly by slitting their throats, in a town near Maiduguri on the 28th.
President Jonathan’s response was to visit a Christian church on Sunday and congratulate the security forces on preventing many more attacks during Christmas week: “Although we still recorded some incidents, the extent of attacks which (Boko Haram) planned was not allowed to be executed.” If this is what success looks like, Nigeria is in very deep trouble.
Part of the reason is the “security forces”, which are corrupt, incompetent, and brutal. In the murderous rampages that are their common response to Boko Haram’s attacks, they have probably killed more innocent people than the terrorists themselves, and have certainly stolen more property. Right across the country’s mainly Muslim north, they are Boko Haram’s best recruiting sergeants.
But it is the government that raises, trains and pays these security forces, and even in a continent where many countries have problems with the professionalism of the army and police, Nigeria’s are in a class by themselves. That is ultimately because its politicians are also in a class by themselves. There are some honest and serious men and women among them, but as a group they are spectacularly cynical and self-serving.
One reason is Nigeria’s oil: 100 million Nigerians, two-thirds of the population, live on less than a dollar a day, but there is a lot of oil money around to steal, and politics is the best way to steal it. Another is the country’s tribal, regional and religious divisions, which are extreme even by African standards. In the mainly Muslim north, 70 per cent of the population lives below the poverty line; in the mostly Christian south, only half do.

Now add a ruthless Islamist terrorist group to the mix, and stir. Boko Haram’s support does not just come from a tiny minority of religious fanatics and from grieving and angry people turned against the government by the brutality of the security forces. It also comes from a huge pool of unemployed and demoralised young men who have no hope of ever doing anything meaningful with their lives.
Democracy has not transformed politics dramatically for the better anywhere in Nigeria, but the deficit is worst in the north, where the traditional rulers protected their power by making alliances with politicians who appealed to the population’s Islamic sentiments. That’s why all the northern states introduced sharia law around the turn of the century: to stave off popular demands for more far-reaching reforms.
But that solution is now failing, for the cynical politicians who became Islamist merely for tactical reasons are being outflanked by genuine fanatics who reject not only science and religious freedom but democracy itself.
Nigeria only has an Islamist terrorist problem at the moment, mostly centred in the north and with sporadic attacks in the Christian-majority parts of the country. But it may be heading down the road recently taken by Mali, in which Islamist extremists actually seize control of the north of the country and divide it in two. And frankly, lots of people in the south wouldn’t mind a bit: just seal the new border, and forget about the north.

I WEEP FOR MY COUNTRY!