hi nairalanders, am dr.love from port harcourt. u can tell me all ur love problem and it will be solved.
be it family or relationship problem. am always online 24,7. drop the write up and come back in 1 day time i
will reply u.


thanks,
dr.love just helping the nairalanders.its free

My problem is

i CANNOT love sef.

My problem be say, why men like to UnCloth me with their eyes, is it because of de way I dress, talk, walk, smell?

ok love doctor, what exactly is love?

Lol

Dokita

Wey you dey oooooooo

this problem dey killie me oooooooooooooo

Inject me with love drips

^{problems ko solution ni}another clown

lol

na because you think they are undressing u - maybe they are not.

Are you the luv dokto?

@ His grace
You be the love doc, I no ask you, oya make you post your own question.

What boredom can do.

Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away." - cao alvin

"Love is friendship set on fire." - dr.lov

"To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia." -love doctor

"Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it, It really is worth fighting for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don't risk everything, you risk even more." - love doctor


"Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness." - dr.love

"Maybe love is like luck. You have to go all the way to find it." - dr.love

"Love stretches your heart and makes you big inside." - dr.love


"Love is like war: Easy to begin but hard to end." - by dr.love

"Loves makes your soul crawl out from its hiding place." - dr.love

"Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired." -dr.love

"Love is more than three words mumbled before bedtime. Love is sustained by action, a pattern of devotion in the things we do for each other every day." - cao alvin

"To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven." - dr.love

"A love song is just a caress set to music." - dr.love

"Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit."

"Love is like a violin. The music may stop now and then, but the strings remain forever."

"Love is the only sane and satisfactory answer to the problem of human existence." -

"In the final analysis, love is the only reflection of man's worth." -

"Love doesn't make the world go round, love is what makes the ride worthwhile."


"To love is to suffer. To avoid suffering one must not love. But then one suffers from not loving. Therefore to love is to suffer, not to love is to suffer. To suffer is to suffer. To be happy is to love. To be happy then is to suffer. But suffering makes one unhappy. Therefore, to be unhappy one must love, or love to suffer, or suffer from too much happiness. I hope you're getting this down."
by dr.love

WHAT IS LOVE? It is one of the most difficult questions for the mankind. Centuries have passed by, relationships have bloomed and so has love. But no one can give the proper definition of love. To some “Love is friendship set on fire” for others “Maybe love is like luck. You have to go all the way to find it”. No matter how you define it or feel it, love is the eternal truth in the history of mankind.

Love is patient, love is kind. It has no envy, nor it boasts itself and it is never proud. It rejoices over the evil and is the truth seeker. Love protects; preserves and hopes for the positive aspect of life. Always stand steadfast in love, not fall into it. It is like the dream of your matter of affection coming true.


AM HERE TO SERVE NAIRALAND ITS ALL 4 FREE.COME TELL ME UR PROBLEMS.

DR.LOVE

Dr Love,my heart beats each time i think of my baby. What could be the cause?

Dear gamine,why cant u love,u see every one needs love.be it fatherly,motherly,sisterly or brotherly we all need love.

i know u must have gone thru some breaks in ur heart.still try to love someone i knw its nt easy but u have to.

when u love someone u ur self u will be happy,and that will make u feel good all d time.

is like u have something u want to tell me  say it.

am here to solve it.

am waitin,am online 24,7.

thanks

dr.love

dear blue,u heart beats when thinking of ur baby becos u love her so much and u are always scared that she is with someone. dont u trust ur baby? do u think, that she will leave u for another.

always fill free about any matter of ur baby.

trust is love.

wish u the best.

dr.love

cao alvin:

dear blue,u heart beats when thinking of your baby because u love her so much and u are always scared that she is with someone. don't u trust your baby? do u think, that she will leave u for another.

always fill free about any matter of your baby.

trust is love.

wish u the best.

dr.love

YOU GOT IT ABSOLUTELY WRONG BECAUSE WITHOUT TRUST I WOULDN'T HAVE LOVED HER IN THE FIRST PLACE. I AM NEVER SCARED OR AFRAID. SHE IS FAITHFUL,HONEST AND SINCERE,SO WHY SHOULD I BE SCARED?

look at u now say ur self the question,y ur heart beat.

u dont trust her.thats it.

heart only beat when someone is afraid of some thing,be it anything.thats it.

nairalanders i knw some nairalanders will make u all fill that am nt right
have been an advicer for more than 6 years now ,since from my secondary school day in port harcourt under the guardians and councillin department in my skool then.

YOU GOT IT ABSOLUTELY WRONG BECAUSE WITHOUT TRUST I WOULDN'T HAVE LOVED HER IN THE FIRST PLACE. I AM NEVER SCARED OR AFRAID. SHE IS FAITHFUL,HONEST AND SINCERE,SO WHY SHOULD I BE SCARED?

Then why is your heart beating?

Hey dr. love. . . . . . my challenge is no1 seems to love Silly!. . . . . why?

dear blue,dont u know some one can love without trust? u better know now.u know nothing about love.

ur love doctor is alway right.

thanks

dr.love

Which of the love are you preaching Mr cao alvin. . . The real LOVE that most people dont know about or the Love(LOST) that people/everyone know even those that have never experience LOVE. . .

PLease can you tell how it feels when one is in love. . .I mean BIOLOGICALLY,CHEMISTRY and ALL scientific explanation.
I believe you would know all this as well. . .
Would love to read from you. . .Mr Cao alvin

scientific explaination of how one feels when you are in love.

mr.cao Alvin


Conducting research with lovesick college students in port harcourt,poses some special challenges. At least that's what emeka Aron, PhD, and his colleagues found while running a brain imaging study a few years ago in port harcourt. His participants—students who had recently fallen madly in love—had no trouble with the first part of an experiment: lying in a brain-imaging machine, gazing at their partners' pictures and thinking about the person they loved. But when Aron asked students to shift their attention to a picture of an acquaintance, he ran into trouble.

“They couldn't stop thinking about their partners,” says Aron, a social psychology professor at port harcourt University.

After months of pilot testing, Aron, Lucy Brown, PhD, and Helen okon, PhD, and their colleagues discovered that they could distract participants by showing them a randomly generated number and making them count backwards by sevens for several minutes. Only afterward could they think about their acquaintances.

“One subject told us that having done that in the study helped her go to sleep at night,” Aron says.

The great lengths the student had to go through to stop pondering her partner illustrates what a powerful force romantic love is, says Aron. But, contrary to popular opinion, that force is not an emotion, he contends. Rather, it is a motivational state, perhaps one as fundamental as hunger and thirst.

Recent research by Aron and others supports this theory. For instance, functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) studies show that dopamine-rich areas of the brain light up when we think about a romantic partner. Those regions, such as the ventral tegmental area (VTA), are known as the motivation and reward system, and appear to activate whenever people get something they deeply desire—food, water, cocaine or perhaps a girlfriend's phone call. Some behavioral research, as well as people's description of romantic love, lends further support to the theory, Aron says.

“For many people, the experience of falling in love is like being in a desert and suddenly seeing water out there,” notes cao Alvin

Exquisite suffering

A parched man in the desert may feel elated upon spotting an oasis. But if the water turns out to be a mirage, he'll experience an entirely different set of strong emotions, notes Brown, PhD, a antropology professor at College of Medicine in port harcourt. The fact that love, like thirst, can lead to a wide variety of intense feelings suggests that it's closer to being a drive than an emotion in its own right, she says.

“People tend to think when you are in love you are happy, but love can also mean feeling anxious, angry, sad,” says Brown.

An as-yet-unpublished study by psychology graduate student Bianca Acevedo confirms Brown's hunch. Acevedo, in her fourth year at Stony Brook University, gave 183 students a list of 69 emotion words, such as affection, jealousy and bliss. She then gave them one of four target terms—anger, fear, joy, sadness or love—and asked them to check off all the emotion words that related to their target term.

She found that people checked off about seven more list items when given the target term “love” than they did with the other targets. What's more, the students linked both positive and negative words to “love,” whereas words like “joy” garnered only positive associations.

“We believe this shows that love, in general, operates differently than emotions,” Acevedo says. Those who think of love as an emotion may be misdirected by the fact that love can cause such strong emotions, she notes.

Some emotion researchers take issue with that stance. belema PhD, a psychologist and the senior research scientist at the Labs, says that the flash of love, the warmth and affection that you feel for just a few moments when you think about a lover, is an emotion. And like other emotions, love has a distinct nonverbal display, according to a 2006 study by Gona and his colleagues in Emotion (Vol. 6, No. 2, pages 163–179). The researchers videotaped 63 couples while they reminisced about their first date. During these exchanges, participants tended to lean toward each other, smile and gesture with open hands, the researchers found.

In contrast to Acevedo's findings, the participants in Gona study reported feeling a consistent set of positive emotions, including high levels of happiness and arousal and low levels of discomfort and fear.

The conflicting results may come from the varying definitions of love used by different schools of researchers, Gona notes.

“There are a lot of theories of love and love across time,” Gona notes. “In some conceptions love isn't always a good thing. It isn't always a happy thing.”

Drug-like effects

While there may be moments of placidity, the larger experience of love is a mixed bag, Aron agrees. In fact, participants in Aron's fMRI study, published in the Journal of Neurophysiology (Vol. 94, No. 1, pages 327–337), reported a variety of different emotions as they gazed at their partners—and their brains, too, showed a diverse array of activation patterns. Some participants who reported being happily in love even reacted to the photos with increased amygdala activity—a response associated with fear and anxiety.

Those fretful participants might have been worried about the possibility of losing their partners, notes Brown, a study co-author.

“With love, emotion is certainly involved, and emotion areas of the brain are involved, but it is going to be much more dependent on the individual's personality and attachment style,” she says.

While the participants in Aron's study felt many different emotions when thinking of the person they loved, they did have one thing in common—they all showed activation in the VTA, the right posterodorsal body and the medial caudate nucleus. These dopamine-rich regions of the brain signal satiation of deep needs, notes Helen, PhD, an anthropology professor at uniport

“All of the basic drives are associated with the dopamine system, and so is romantic love,” Fisher notes.

The increase in energy that people newly in love experience—their ability to stay up all night talking—may be due to a flush of dopamine, Fisher says. Dopamine-system activation is also related to focused attention, underpinning the feeling that one person is the new center of your world, she says.

Some of the same systems activated in people who are happily in love are also similar to those activated among people who have been recently rejected, according to an as-yet-unpublished study by helenand her colleagues. They had 15 lovelorn students lie in an fMRI machine and look at pictures of their former partner or a familiar acquaintance.

As with the happily in love students, the lovelorn showed increased activation in the motivation and reward systems when they thought about the person they loved. Unlike the happily in love students, the lovelorn also showed activation in their right nucleus accumbens, an area of the brain associated with taking big risks.

Taken together, the studies paint a picture of love acting in a manner not unlike cocaine, which also works through the dopamine system and causes intense craving, says Fisher.

“Addictions are very powerful, and all of the addictions are associated with dopamine in one way or another,” she notes.

Seeing love as an intense drive to be close to someone, rather than an emotion, may help clinicians understand the yearning people have for their loved-ones, says Fisher. It could also help us predict how people will react when they can't get what they want, she says.

“Many instances of homicide and suicide and stalking are associated with romantic love, and the more we can understand the basic processes in the brain, the more we can understand why people commit these crimes,” says hellen.

thanks
dr.love

is a research by dr.love. the scientific way of when one falls in love

research by dr.love

Scientific view of Love (scientific views)
Throughout history, philosophy and religion have done the most speculation on the phenomenon of love. In the last century, the science of psychology has written a great deal on the subject. In recent years, the sciences of evolutionary psychology, evolutionary biology, anthropology, neuroscience, and biology have added to the understanding of the nature and function of love.


Chemistry
Biological models of sex tend to view love as a mammalian drive, much like hunger or thirst.[3] Helen, a leading expert in the topic of love, divides the experience of love into three partly-overlapping stages: lust, attraction, and attachment. Lust exposes people to others, romantic attraction encourages people to focus their energy on mating, and attachment involves tolerating the spouse long enough to rear a child into infancy.

Lust is the initial passionate sexual desire that promotes mating, and involves the increased release of chemicals such as testosterone and estrogen. These effects rarely last more than a few weeks or months. Attraction is the more individualized and romantic desire for a specific candidate for mating, which develops out of lust as commitment to an individual mate forms. Recent studies in neuroscience have indicated that as people fall in love, the brain consistently releases a certain set of chemicals, including pheromones, dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin, which act similar to amphetamines, stimulating the brain's pleasure center and leading to side-effects such as an increased heart rate, loss of appetite and sleep, and an intense feeling of excitement. Research has indicated that this stage generally lasts from one and a half to three years.[4]

Since the lust and attraction stages are both considered temporary, a third stage is needed to account for long-term relationships. Attachment is the bonding which promotes relationships that last for many years, and even decades. Attachment is generally based on commitments such as marriage and children, or on mutual friendship based on things like shared interests. It has been linked to higher levels of the chemicals oxytocin and vasopressin than short-term relationships have.[4]

In 2005, Italian scientists at Pavia University found that a protein molecule known as the nerve growth factor (NGF) has high levels when people first fall in love, but these levels return to as they were after one year. Specifically, four neurotrophin levels, i.e. NGF, BDNF, NT-3, and NT-4, of 58 subjects who had recently fallen in love were compared with levels in a control group who were either single or already engaged in a long-term relationship. The results showed that NGF levels were significantly higher in the subjects in love than as compared to either of the control groups.[5]


Psychology
Further information: Human bonding
Psychology depicts love as a cognitive and social phenomenon. Psychologist Robert Sternberg formulated a triangular theory of love and argued that love has three different components: intimacy, commitment, and passion. Intimacy is a form by which two people can share secrets and various details of their personal lives. Intimacy is usually shown in friendships and romantic love affairs. Commitment, on the other hand, is the expectation that the relationship is going to last forever. The last and most common form of love is sexual attraction and passion. Passionate love is shown in infatuation as well as romantic love.

Following developments in electrical theories, such as Coulomb's law, which showed that positive and negative charges attract, analogs in human life were developed, such as "opposites attract". Over the last century, research on the nature of human mating has generally found this not to be true when it comes to character and personality; people tend to like people like themselves. However, in a few unusual and specific domains, such as immune systems, it seems that humans prefer others who are unlike themselves (e.g. with an orthogonal immune system), since this will lead to a baby which has the best of both worlds.[6] In recent years, various human bonding theories have been developed described in terms of attachments, ties, bonds, and affinities.

Some Western authorities disaggregate into two main components, the altruistic and the narcissistic. This view is represented in the works of Scott Peck, whose works in the field of applied psychology explored the definitions of love and evil. Peck maintains that love is a combination of the "concern for the spiritual growth of another", and simple narcissism.[7] In combination, love is an activity, not simply a feeling.


Scientific models
Biological models of love tend to see it as a mammalian drive, just like hunger or thirst. Psychology sees love as more of a social and cultural phenomenon. There are probably elements of truth in both views — certainly love is influenced by hormones (such as oxytocin), neurotrophins (such as NGF), and pheromones, and how people think and behave in love is influenced by their conceptions of love.

The conventional view in biology is that there are two major drives in love — sexual attraction and attachment. Attachment between adults is presumed to work on the same principles that lead an infant to become attached to its mother. The traditional psychological view sees love as being a combination of companionate love and passionate love. Passionate love is intense longing, and is often accompanied by physiological arousal (shortness of breath, rapid heart rate). Companionate love is affection and a feeling of intimacy not accompanied by physiological arousal.

@Dr Love

Can you answer to my existing thread that NO ONE on Nairaland has answer at all on the following quote below? _{[modified per se request by @Dr. Love]}

uspry1:

Have you heard popular quote: "BEST FRIEND IS BEST LOVER" before? If this quote is true, then the marriage would have solid everlasted strong relationshp until we do apart.

I no fit believing in "BEST FRIEND IS BEST LOVER" anymore. I think this quote is MISLEADING! The lover CAN NEVER BE EQUAL a best friend. The reason is that not much trust exists between lovers and that is why their is always a breakup. But a best friend is always there and the trust is always solid and last till old age. 

Tell me why this quote does not work. I want to hear your opinion, explanation, and/or testimony. Alternatively, you can show me the prove that the quote is really exist. 

Eyah

BEST FRIEND IS BEST LOVER. it depend on the 2 party invovled.u know the more closer 2 persons are together the more the feeling.its can work out on the other hand it can not. have carried out a work on this topic.and it show the 49.5per cent it will work.

as i say its feelin ,if the guy don't have a galfriend as in lover and the girl too don't have a guy as a lover and this 2 always 2gether the feeling of frienship will no longer be their.they wil be switch over to the feelin of romantic friendship,in this case they will both fall in love and start dating,


but when the guy have a girl that is his lover and he also have a girl as a friend the feeling of his galfriend that is just a friend will be feelin of ovon i call it ovon because it has no romantic affection.smae goes to the girl if she has a guy who is her love and also have a friend{guy} just friends.it will nt work out they will just be friends.


but if one of them had a broken heart from their partner,they will come closer to their female or male friend and tranfer the love they have with their former ex to the best friend,from their they can start a relationship.with the last write up above IT IS CLEAR THAT BEST FRIEND IS BEST LOVER.

DR.LOVE Lyrics


My Best Lover Was My Best
We'd sing love song
and dance all night.
We'd hold each other
till mornin light.
Even when the bad
had gone on home
Our two hearts
were going strong.

Chorus:
My best lover
was my best friend.
Tell me God Why
it had to end?
I miss her laughter,
I miss that grin.
I miss my lover,
I miss my friend.

They carried you
into the other room
and said it was almost time.
Joy filled the air
as the tears fell from your eyes.
And when the time had come
and you saw that life begin
You never knew that
another life would end.

Repeat Chorus

So now the flowers are
being laid on your grave.
Every shattered dream
is being soaked by the rain.
God may have taken
you from this world,
but he left me with an Angel

@Dr. Love

Thank you for respond! I have one more question still complying with my "BEST FRIEND IS BEST LOVER".

What about a guy has a girl that he proposed her an engagement 2 years ago and a girl that is his lifelong platonic friend until he discovered his engaged girl's true color that led him changing his mind switching over to his romantic friendship of platonic one?

The platonic one does not have a guy that is her lover due to lot of dating rejections and was hurt over lost friendship by him for one year long time no see and no heard at all. All of sudden he jumps excitedly to call his platonic friend letting her know that he is on the verge of break-up engagement anytime sooner.

The problem is platonic one erased everything she has with him after told him the truth about having her feeling for him when he broke up other girl in 4 years relationship.

As of result, 2 year ago he rejected his platonic friend twice choosing different girl to date with then eventually engaged her- - -even both (he and platonic girlfriend) already sat down talking each other about closure asking for forgiveness and forgeting what he hurt her due to his confusion on many things wrongly!!!

Is it good ideal to reconcile old best friend starting all over new romantic relationship once the engagement is broken?

Dr!!! Dr!!! i need your help o. . . when do you know it is LOVE. . .but not infactuations?