I know a woman, each time she is heavily gauged, she starts to walk backwards. It's almost like her signature now .

1. I have been drunk to the extent that I was using touchlight to check if there is light from PHCN.
2. I have been drunk to the extent that I forgot my babe in the club
3. I have been drunk to the extent that I vomit on the tv in a viewing center while celebrating goal scored by my club.
4. I have been drunk to extent that myself and a friend forgot his new car in the car park of the joint where we went to drink.
5. I have been drunk to the extent that I fell at my door step and slept off ppl woke the second day and raised alarm that am dead.
6. I have been drunk to the extent that I forgot that am married, I went home with a club girl and got to my door before I remember that my wife is at home.
7. I have been drunk to the extent that I slept off while straffing a babe.
8. I was drunk the day I assist the person that the person that fixed me up with my present job.
9. Although I have retired from bing drinking, drunkenness is having it's up and down. I never regret any of my drunken moments.

I remember when I went out with some friends sometime ago. One of my friends wore a stud and got so drunk he started misbehaving, he grab a girls b00bs on our way out of the bar and the girl gave him a dirty slap that made his stud fall inside the gutter, next thing we knew the guy was dipping his hand into the gutter and crying. Haaaa eti mi oo, eti mi ti jabo si gutter(ha my ear has fallen into the gutter) nobody could calm him down he wept like a baby.we still call him Eti till this day.

Sister so na everyday u dey go Church?

Afam4eva: I'm curious to how alcohol could alter people's sanity for the moment. One of these days, i'll drink myself to drunkenness and have myself filmed. I want to experience it for myself.

Just make sure ‎u do this around trusted friends. ‎u tube tingz trending

Got drunk with friends and went to a night vigil with a black leather jacket. Once we entered the hall, everybody was looking at us like we were armed robbers.

The dance we we dance that day, I no go forget.

Before y'all hypocritical Christains start shouting on me, I know a couple of high ranking pastors that take a 'sip' before they hit the altar.

floragregs: The OP faked his story. One comedian done talk the joke before! Let's stop recycling jokes abeg, its dry!

U can just play along flora.
It's on the lighter side.

hay sal: Jesus christ of kwara state......dis shit made first page

what kind of poo should av made front page? U r such a sad guy

hustla: oh boi aimoye highness..mk i go reason wella come back

i was once so high i started laughing at a non-existent gatemam at Elegushi.ma friend saw me laughing and joined in too...na so we laugh dey roll fr floor oooooo,oda ppl wia high too so no one tot we looked.stupid...

other friends had to force me to enter d car oooo,they said i insisted i wasnt leaving Elegushi...




That ma other friend on d other hand....slept on the sand there at Elegushi..he woke up the next morning with no phone or money

Lol.. Hmmm are you sure you were high on alcohol or d other one

Afam4eva: I'm curious to how alcohol could alter people's sanity for the moment. One of these days, i'll drink myself to drunkenness and have myself filmed. I want to experience it for myself.

Alcohol gets into the bloodstream and eventually gets into the brain which affects sight, sense of balance and reflexes. I won't advice you to get drunk, too much alcohol is not good for not only your brain but also your liver and kidneys.

i was returning from school one day wen i saw an elderly ma with grey hair lying in a gutter filled with slimy filth,some guys were trying to get him out but he refused.when asked why he was there he kept saying 'na drink cause am',after trying to get him out for a long tym dem just leave the guy for there,anoda one was with a roommate after attending a party at a nearby club returned very drunk he went straight for his bed and started sleeping,after sometime he started making some noises then he stood up,turned around,took out his sugarcane and started pissin on the bed when he was thru he jumped back on the bed and continued sleeping.from dat day i swear say i no go drink till i die

I have seen a lady that was drunk and slept on a grave behind her house till the next morning.

floragregs: The OP faked his story. One comedian done talk the joke before! Let's stop recycling jokes abeg, its dry!

even if "one comedian done talk the joke before" som of us no hear am. So 4 doz hearin it 4 d first time, its hot, fresh and indeed funny...abeg guys drop more lines joor

Na one guy go drink cum dey hide under table say sky wan fall on top am can u imagine lols

all these baby drinkers

floragregs: The OP faked his story. One comedian done talk the joke before! Let's stop recycling jokes abeg, its dry!

you whc 1 you contribute? Bad belle

There was this night a musician named Davido was drunk on his way from the club with his friends. They stopped at a check-point where some MOPOL officers ordered for a stop and search and instead of this Davido guy to behave himself, he jumped out from the vehicle like a monkey and was shouting ontop of his voice, "Don't you know who i am? How dare you stop me?"
Na so one of the MOPOL guy just land Davido slap Kpawammmmm! And Davido was like
If not for the other guys, the boy would have lost his life that day!

One of my uncles got so drunk one day and I saw him standing by the roadside, it was during December festivities and I called him and said uncle enter the car and let's go, he said I should be going that he is waiting for his house to come so that he will enter, that other people's houses were passing by. I later realized he was referring to cars driving through as houses. We later mobilized with my cousins and forcefully threw him inside the car and held him down till we took him home. This man died about 3 years ago and yes, he was a perpetual drunk till when he died.

Was out celebrating with my friends i drank alot that day. Then suddenly a call came in from my uncle asking me to come home. I left in a hurry drunk. Got a motorcycle and was heading home, half way through we had an accidents I got up didnt bother to ask question gave the okada money left my change with him and was heading home on foot. When i got home didnt bother to go answer my uncle went straight to bed without feeling any pain. But oh boy when i wake up for morning i meet myself for hospital with injuries all over my body na then i come begin feel pain from the accident. Since that day i vow never to be drunk again

How many I wan tel una(I dey watch dia film evwi wikend 4 area)

One man don high sote,as in con dey go haus in see 1 pole 4 road..d guy start dey talk 2 himsef"u tink sae u get craze abi?ehn we go see who go comot road 4 each oda"..na dia in sleep


One man drink finish,take him okada comot.. afta 30mins in con bak dey cry and asking people who help am see in okada..na lik afta 30mins in wife con tel evwibody sae na haus in park am"

One man drink finish...in wan wash in face..na so in go sink in head 4 pepper soup

Wow.... mahn keep them coming in... am getting drunk with ur drunk experience.....

Afam4eva: I'm curious to how alcohol could alter people's sanity for the moment. One of these days, i'll drink myself to drunkenness and have myself filmed. I want to experience it for myself.

please do! i am reserving a front page for you on that. no fail us o.. we dey wait o

I went to buy water outside my house,and just walked a little bit futher,i saw two men bending,i been so curious decided to see what would happen next,i came closer and the men reeked of alchohol, a matured man whom i percived was the owner of the car was complaning "argh argh this car door is refusing to open"the other man was busy doing his own guess what they were not touching the door sef it was the tyres they were screwing,i could'nt help but laugh laugh and laugh

hay sal: Jesus christ of kwara state......dis shit made first page

na kwara state jesus 4rm nw,that mean jesus is my brother cos am 4rm kwara state also

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6jjCHWLDJoQ

lilTunechi: I remember wen 1 of my friend high d guy jst dy talk rubish as we dy walk. D worse part na wen hin c 1 black nylon dy move 4 ground. D guy jst move back aim d nylon cm wid speed jump am. Hin cm talk "Øboi, dis rock wey dy move big O".

Hahahahhahahahahhahhahahahhahahhahahhahaha

goldfish80: I was once so tipsy I used My phone light to search for My phone.

guy dat one no be drukines na madness. Haahahahaahahahahahahah

This reminds me the story of two drunker coming from a friend's party, getting to a junction and ask a taxi driver to take them to the same junction they were standing. The driver ask them to enter and charge each #200. He starts the car and raised the car voooooom! and then stopped the car and then ask for his money. The one in front ask so fast....the driver reply..... Yes!

The one at the back seat, just give the driver a slap from back ....paaaaa
.....the driver thought he get his logic....

And the man said stupi.d boy thats how they we be endanger people's life with overspeed.

Take your money.

A colleague once told me a story an incident involving a friend of his who had had one bottle two many at a party. one night. He subsequently to the disapproval and protests of his friends elected to drive himself home. About some two hours later, my colleague and others also followed suit. Whilst on their way they saw the vehicle belonging to his drunk friend parked by the side of the street miles away from the way to his his residence, they pulled over and didn't find him in the car whose windows were not wound-down. An abrupt search for him within the neighbourhood wasn't fruitful. They thus thereafter opted to have the car secured by winding-up its glasses and set off for home. They were however astonished after about some three (3) minutes driving from the place were his car had been found parked off the road to see him strutting around with a four (4) litre can filled with fuel in tow in his hand. They pulled over and asked him what the issue was. He tipsily responded that whilst driving home from the venue of the party to retire back home to his crib, the car had stalled on its own after having run out of fuel and he had gone to purchase fuel but he could not locate where he'd parked the car any more. his friends could not help laughing as he was simply not too far off from his supposedly 'untraceable' car. Long and short of the story, they all drove back to spot were the car was parked helped him, had it fueled and someone volunteered to take over the controls of the car's steering wheel as he could not be trusted to drive the same home all by himself.