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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) (134845 Views)
My Elder Sister Is Feeling Suicidal / Are you feeling angry right now? Let-off steam here! / Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 10:59pm On Jan 26, 2016 |
FullOfShame:Andromida has written extensively. You have to tell your parents and start afresh.They may not pay your school fees but it means you will stop living a lie. Send them a mail,if you can't talk on phone or meet face-to-face. Your parents should have paid your school fees directly to the school instead of giving you the money after the first experience.They didn't learn too. 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 12:58am On Jan 27, 2016 |
Hello guys. Moments ago I was just staring at a fan hook. And thots of taking my life kept on creeping inn.events leading to this day follows suit. In 2012: an incident took place in my place if work and judgementally I was asked to bear the loss because of my indirect involement& as a supervisor that day. Sold my car and few property to pay up the loss to the tune of 2million naira. within a given time.during that time. My overtime allowance, leave bonuses,and profit sharing allowances all stopped.only half salary. I eventually paid up. But a year went by. The management went silent on the issue. Fast forward to 2014.pleaded with them if my issue is resolved and at least resume my fully salary. They ignored. But all this while I put in more effort on the job. Making sure they are satisfied, hoping to redeem myself but it all failed. They employed new staffs gave them cars and tripple their salaries. But they left me same half salary. Which have left me in neck deep debt.. No savings anymore, house rent due.can't even continue my marriage plans this year..mean while I have searched for jobs and prayed to leave the company, but so far nothing has worked out.either has my prayers been answered. Days ago. They did another 40% increment.... So disappointing that nothing for me again...only same half salary. Am tired frustrated! don't feel like working anymore. And just sad and feeling its just too much.at 32years of age. Nothing has been working anymore. I wakeup praying, and crying seeing work colleagues much younger than me,been treated well while I have been reduced to nothing.... After putting so much commitment and hard work for 8years....it just hurts so much. Even friends feel I should resign. But I havnt gotten a new job.and they are asking me(the company) via mail to put in more effort in 2016. Even after seeing certain upgrade they carried out without me. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 7:12am On Jan 27, 2016 |
igwemoagbo:It can be frustrating bro and I can feel your pains.However,it's not enough to want to end it all. I want you to see this as a passing phase and a trial that will make you come out a stronger person.I don't know what relationship you have with God but this is the time to draw close to Him.I believe He has bigger plans for you. I see you exiting that job for something better but I wouldn't want you to resign just yet.You must have an alternative first. Keep enduring,it won't be long before the storm will be over.There's something brewing for your good before the end of this quarter 2016. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 7:20am On Jan 27, 2016 |
Kazna69:Focus bro,focus. What do you desire to become?You must have a dream and aspirations towards it. What's your level of education now and if I may ask,what about your family? |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 8:57am On Jan 27, 2016 |
thorpido: It never really came to me while growing up. Self discovery talk was completely foreign to me. No one talked to me about that stuff. I guess a degree in the Arts is a start. I just want to live comfortable. I only got high school cert, quit Uni cos frustrated. Family sucks @$$, I've come to detest the concept of a family unit & feel I'll have better luck among thieves. Mother's a b!tch, she left when I was 18, younger sister's another b!tch who's never supported me for anything plus she's disrespectful & I'm itching to kill her, dad's just a oblivious idiot who's never listened to me. I basically hate my family background & want to just walk away & never come back cos I don't give a Fûck no more. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by FullOfShame: 9:52am On Jan 27, 2016 |
thorpido: andromida: andromida: Thanks to you two. I'll proceed to tell them. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 10:37am On Jan 27, 2016 |
FullOfShame:Yea.You can give me a feedback on how it went. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 10:42am On Jan 27, 2016 |
Kazna69:I will encourage you to go back to school.Try and get a university education.I don't know how old you are. The issue of finance will come in and it seems you don't have the funds.What i'll encourage you to do is get a source of income and get into part-time studies when you have sufficient funds. It seems family is out of it for you,so you'll need to support yourself. Try and make friends too.You need people to help you build bridges. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 6:17pm On Jan 27, 2016 |
thorpido: How do you expect me to go back to school when I have insomnia & social anxiety? How do you expect me to get a job with ssce when I have no skills whatever? I don't even know where to look? How do you expect me to "make friends" when I just don't connect with people, I'm not the talking type. I'm introverted & I don't really concern myself with most garbage that Nigerians especially young people like to yap about so what's there to talk about? Besides if I don't have any friends now, it means people just won't accept me for me & I have no reason to want to be friends with people cos they simply won't understand anything. It only makes sense to think I can never have real friends cos people act fake. Fûck em! |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 7:55pm On Jan 27, 2016 |
Kazna69:Insomnia and anxiety can be dealt with by psychotherapy and drugs. You can get jobs even with SSCE.It won't be a white collar job and won't pay much but you can get by with it.Can you teach?I'm sure there are schools that need assistant teachers.You can also do office assistant jobs just to name a few. About making friends,sometimes you just need to leave your comfort zone.You don't have to force yourself on people but you can be more receptive to them.There are people who will accept you just the way you are as long as you are not snobbish.There are introverts who get along well with people. Will you be my friend? |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by anna5: 8:57pm On Jan 27, 2016 |
andromida:ur right it goes way back, to wen I didn't get admission, stayed at home for 2years and he frustrated my life. Mum has been helping with wt she can |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 10:30pm On Jan 27, 2016 |
thorpido: 1. I don't want to resort to a life of using drugs for fear of being addicted to it. 2. I know it won't be a while collar job duh 3. I don't like the idea of teaching, I don't know what to teach Cant teach what I don't know Not good at speaking, long talk wears me out & I'm hardly understood I don't like dealing with kids, they're noisy. 4. I'm never the type to force myself on people, it's a concept I was aware of since forever. If people don't gravitate to me for whatever reason IDGAF. I know I was always friendly, maybe even too much that's why I feel so torn inside cost I was too cool with everybody. I'm always open but wary of those who come close but people misunderstood my introverted & reserved nature as snobbish which pissed me off, drove in the opposite direction. 5. Nigguh, that's a trick question |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by GboyegaD(m): 6:32am On Jan 28, 2016 |
Nubian113: You could share for the sake of others in similar position. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by thorpido(m): 2:25pm On Jan 28, 2016 |
Kazna69:You don't have to be on drugs forever.You may not even be placed on drugs,just sessions of psychotherapy. I just suggested teaching,that may not be your area of interest but there are other areas.I see young people doing one thing or the other and i know they are jobs you don't need a degree for.Sometimes it's just your personality you need to fit into such jobs.You just have to try. I'll recommend you visit a clinical psychologist. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 5:09pm On Jan 28, 2016 |
GboyegaD: Depression: I used this time to work on the cause of my depression rather than the symptoms, depression, anxiety, panic. I took time out to read self help books on mental health. This was a huge relief because it wasn't my fault why I felt like this, I got the CORRECT answers to my questions such as, why me? What's the point, my life is unworthy... These answers lead me to solutions like really understanding sanity (do things differently) and insanity ( doing the something again and again yet expecting different results every time) once I acknowledged this fact I took on a journey of doing things differently. First thing I did was follow the tasks and exercises in the self help books. Mindfulness was a skill I learnt which requires me to be present. I went to the park and walked on the grass barefoot just to feel and focus on that feeling. I would stare at the grass and the beautiful nature around me. This took me outside of my mind where I felt like a prisoner. I walked on sand barefoot to feel the warmth and softness. I started a gratitude list. I would list ten beautiful, things I'm grateful for. My list making was hard at first, but I stuck to my health, organ by organ, the day, the weather, the people I meet, because these were easier to help generate happy feelings. The most important thing I did was to seek medical advice and my doctor put me on a course of antidepressants and counseling side by side. The counselor educated me about my brain and how to maintain it's wellbeing. I worked on inner child, and life traps and inner pain. This was not a quick fix. It took me two years on medication, six months counseling and a lifetime change from within has bought me to today. Today I am happy, I am complete and most importantly I am grateful for that experience because I came out a kinder, wiser, stronger woman for it. 3 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 5:45pm On Jan 28, 2016 |
thorpido:What are you a therapist? Bleep that! |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by deGovernor2024: 6:30pm On Jan 28, 2016 |
Sequel to my earlier post below. My condition is getting out of hand. https://www.nairaland.com/2862636/why-everyone-cares-when-too Things are getting critical and my immediate family is tearing apart. Mynd44, Lalasticlala, Seun ,davide490 and fellow Nairalanders. Please your brother here is going through the most trying time. Things are extremely very bad from me. Like I said before my two kids are out of school for 3wks now cos I can't pay their fees again. And secondly the menial job am doing can only provide food for the kids not their school fees. I need to get the school fee pay but I don't know how to go about it. Please help your brother. I couldn't sleep home again cos of transport fare to the building site where am carrying blocks a least to get money for the kids feeding. I go home every 2 or 3days for now. Please am in dire need of financial help and job now. Frustration and depression are killing me gradually. Right now hope it just like that. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bellong: 11:56pm On Jan 29, 2016 |
@Kazna69, I am sorry for not getting back to you. I have been very very busy these past days. I can see that thorpido, GboyegaD and other guys have really done well to advice you. It is well with you. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 12:07am On Jan 30, 2016 |
bellong:Yea no sh!t, it's what everybody says. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bellong: 12:56am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 5:34am On Jan 30, 2016 |
bellong:I mean it's kinda redundant cos I hear it a lot but I do appreciate where it comes from. Thank you. I'll try my best to keep it together & manage. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 5:44am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Kazna69: The thing is. You alone know the answers to your problem. Bill gates could sort you out $3.5mil and you'd be more likely to commit suicide than enjoy what you thought you wanted. What I'm saying is people are more happy with less. You talk of taking kids to school. Can I ask to learn what? If it's knowledge you seek for your children then my brother, education doesn't equate knowledge because men with phd's hate their life. What I'm saying is don't Burden us with your money worries because people in the west can't afford to take their childern to university. And they still get by. People in Africa my mother included have gone by without education and still become a success. I think the hosts are too civil and moderate to call you a scam but I'm calling it! You're a scam artist! Bye |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 5:55am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Nubian113: OK this is weirder than weirdium. Ma'am I think you have me mixed up with somebody, what are you talking about a scam for? That me going through a depression is a scam? Who am I trying to extort money from? What kids? Lady I dunno if you sipped a lil bit of reinforced coffee but you got the wrong guy & I'm offended cos being depressed is a serious issue. Maybe you should check the thread & read the comments again. I can't believe this. Are the mods even seeing this? 1 Like |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 6:21am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Kazna69: Look I called your bs. I am sorry for the scam artist remarks. I call your bs because you sound/read like someone with facts, conditions, and reasoning, as if they read it somewhere. I'm paranoid by nature so I could put My hand up and say I might be wrong about you but you seem to not take advice and you come up with constant obstacles, like money, work, social pressure ect as to why you won't change but you hate yourself and your people. You hate your family well then move the fvck on so that you can sort your shi out and come back a better person. I'll leave you alone with a sincere apology for jumping off the gun at you because I had no right. I am sorry. Ps I mistook you for the poster below you. He call all the mods to help so he could share my comment. He is burdened by money and I was following your story... I'm human and shi happen sometimes. I mistaken you guys into one. I hope you losen up thou. If you take one thing from my blunders that is GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY. PLEASE. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 6:34am On Jan 30, 2016 |
bellong: I'm sorry made an error. Might have upset him. I'm out. Well done. Again I'm sorry. Bye |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 7:01am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Nubian113: (exhales) ermagerd cos I was thinking I committed a crime. It's OK, I guess. Humans are prone to errors. I'm coming from a place of grief & hurt so it's only natural I resent my family in some way. What do you mean "get out of your own way" I'd like an in-depth explanation if you could. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 7:07am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Kazna69: You seem to be your own obstacle. Instead of agreeing with yourself; every now and again play the devils advocate and give yourself another point of view. You have the answers. You have to like yourself in order for people to like you. You have to love yourself in order for people to love you. You need to respect yourself in order for people to respect you. You see it was always about you so no one else could possibly have the answer. They're just being polite and civil. You have this power you seek and you just gotta get to know your soul and its needs. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 7:57am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Nubian113: I'll say my problem has always been letting go & finding acceptance in myself & who I am. I'm beginning to understand that concept & slowly not holding on to people's opinions of me. But when it comes to life's purpose, how do I find "the answer" what am I looking for? |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by bellong: 9:03am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Kazna69: The purpose of life can only be revealed or explained by the giver of life itself. I don't know what faith you practise or if you are an atheist. However, being a Christian, OND of the reasons for believing in Christ is to define the purpose of life and open our eyes to see reason for our living. He led by saying, "For this cause was I born, to this purpose came I into the world" The only purpose of life I understand is the one defined by the giver. If you ever want to know, the giver of life will be willing to reveal to you. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 10:58am On Jan 30, 2016 |
bellong:OK don't take this the wrong way but I don't really hear voices in my head, ever. So I don't know how my purpose is supposed to be revealed. I don't feel anything, hear anything or see anything. I'm simply not "tuned in" to spiritual matters. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by RoyalRoy(m): 11:19am On Jan 30, 2016 |
Kazna69: You will.....u only need to listen more!! Great job guys...Bellong, Thorpido, GboyegaD, and all others. @Nubian113, in as much as I read that post of the other young man who is having issues with fund, I won't quickly conclude he is a scam. A little more light into his situation will give us some more foot ground. Thanks for your efforts in here though. Appreciated. |
Re: Are You Feeling Suicidal? Come Here First! (part 2) by Nobody: 1:13pm On Jan 30, 2016 |
RoyalRoy: Thanks. Again I'm sorry. 1 Like |
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