@Chistar01 i see you ma nigga. I no change style oh, am just doing my best for my fans.

STILL I FLOW

Lwkmd
Good job, Eze. U need to correct ur mistakes though. Thanks for delivering as usual.


@Flow, lol .. e be like say Neduzze don offend u before.
If we dey pay 500 for evry pidgin, na im be say my account go don red.
Kudos too..

*waiting*

Me sef just dey hear that 500 naira fan, because na pidgin things for my side oh......

#story
eze...my dear, may your days be long! See how i don laugh fall for ground...

Abacha
Rule 17 missing
Room 9

God, am loving this!

A..aaa..aaay.ayaaafff dd...diii..dieee!!!

"i say pay me your money or i take you to Room 9" The Room 9 Dog thundered.

"infact after you pay me the money, i will still take you to Room 9" The Room 9 Dog threatened.

"am sorry sir, it will never happen again" Flow cried.

Flow detested Room 9 because of all what Foxy had told him about the place. Foxy had told him that Room 9 was an over-crowded room, that the whole prisioners were kept in just one room, Foxy told him that albeit the room was big, time to sleep was like time of war, it was 49 sleeping on the floor and 99 stand-sleeping.

Foxy had narrated to Flow how Mosquitoes feasted on them creating tattoos on their bodies. Foxy also told him that the farts of Red Mosquito and Yellow Mosquito smelt like Insecticide that drove away the Mosquitoes.

The thought of how Room 9 might look like sent shivers down Flow's spine that he started speaking gibberish; "i am sorry Oga RND, it will not repeated himself". RND was the acronyn for "Room Nine Dog"

"Oga RND Pls sir forgiving me, i will not spoken Pidgin again" Flow was killing everyone with his grammatical bomb, forgetting that his girlfriend Josephine stood there, the same Josephine he told he was an half-caste, the same Josephine that told him she loves guys that speaks good English that was why she fell for him.

"Flow what are you speaking?" Josephine queried.

"am sorry, it is a slip of tongue" Flow answered.

Skolopy drew closer to Flow and whispered something to his ear, then Flow brought out his wallet, moved closer to the RND officer and pleaded; "Bro RND!! Make i find you 2k na, abeg i no wan go Room 9, abeg".

"am charging you for speaking Pidgin and you are still speaking Pidgin!! You want to go to room nine?" The RND officer threatened.

"God forbid bad thing!! I don't want to go the Room 9 oh"

"okay make it 2500" the RND officer said.

"Oga RND before God and Man, this 2000 is my last card" Flow cried.

"Pls sir!! Pls sir i don't have another money!!" Flow pleaded.

"Okay bring it, and if i catch you speak Pidgin again, i will make sure you pass a night in Room 9" He agreed, collected the money and left smiling.

The RNDs were like NU "Agberos", albeit the VC instructed that they collect 500naira from defaulters, it was obvious all the money wasn't used to fulfil the purpose they were meant for, as HODs, Deans and RNDs shared a larger percentage of it and used the rest to pay the cleaners that kept the lecture halls clean. Being an HOD or Dean in NU could be likened to being a Senator in the Federal republic of Nigeria, little wonder the election of HODs and Deans could be likened to Nigeria's Presidential election. The tenure of Abacha the Literature department HOD was almost over, the prayers of the Literature department students was that Abacha should fail in the forthcoming HOD and Dean election, and for another HOD to take over, maybe Babangida, or maybe not.

Students like Flow and Foxy a.k.a F-square could hold a 41 days dry fasting and prayers for Abacha to fail in the election.


Just when Flow was counting one less trouble, then came another trouble.


"ehen!! Flow you are here, pay me my money oh, you promised to pay me last week, since last week i have been looking for you" It was Bin gbagbo the self acclaimed King of Comedy department. He and Chistar walked towards Flow, it was Chistar who was a Literature student that showed Bin gbagbo where Flow was. Chistar so much hated Flow for snatching his girlfriend Josephine.

The song "Double wahala for dead body" by the Late Legendary Afrobeat musician was heard from afar the Music department. A song that could best describe Flow's condition.

"i say pay me my money" Bin gbagbo barked.

Bin gbagbo was a look-alike to the late Bin laden, just that Bin laden was a terrorist and Bin gbagbo was a comedian. Everything about Bin gbagbo was comedy, but his asking for his 5000naira wasn't at all a comedy, rather it was tragedy.

Just then, Josephine let out a long hiss and left.

"how much him owe you sef?" Skolopy asked.

"he is oweing me 5k" Bin gbagbo answered.

"nahim you dey disgrace am like this?" Skolopy queried.

"Pls Skolopy take it easy with the Pidgin oh, an RND might just pass by oh" Flow warned.

"you better pay him his money and stop telling me about RND!" Skolopy switched to English.

"Pls Sir, Pls Sir i will pay you your money today" Flow pleaded. The smallish Bin gbagbo had suddenly become a "Sir" to the hunky Flow. If calling Bin gbagbo "Oga at the top" could make Flow dept free, then Flow would as well call him "Oga at the top Sir".

Skolopy whispered something to Flow's ear again. Skolopy was a whispering Don Jazzy to everyone in trouble.

"Okay lets go to Forum Game department, i want to gamble, any money i win will be given to you" Flow said.

"you sabi gamble?" Chistar asked.

"na me go help am gamble" Skolopy the award winning gambler said.

As they walked to Forum Game department, little did they know what awaited.


TO BE CONTINUED.

Gud one flow.

Flow toh bad . I just noticed there's no rule17 Nice one oga promoe

Forum Games department was a notorious department in NU, what made the department notorious wasn't the Forum Games department students, neither was it the building that housed the department, but behind the building was a Republic. 411 Republic.

411 Republic was actually the 411 of NU. The dirty, bushy surroundings made the Republic an appalling sight to behold, as it was located at the extreme south of NU, just by the fence that demarcated NU and an off-campus female hostel, it was sheltered by a gigantic Mango tree. 411 was a beehive for gamblers, headquarters for sales of stolen items, and sometimes it served as a bureau de change agency. Obinoscopy the HOD of Forum Games department had tried closing 411, all to no avail because Chamotex and SeanT his assistants were the founders of the Republic.

As they walked passed the department, they saw scrolling on a screen; "WORDS ENDING WITH LETTERS "IC"" as a topic.

"prick! Prick end with IC" Flow yelled. And they all laughed at the naughty Flow.

"mumu! Prick end with ICK" Skolopy corrected.

Why 411 Republic was dreaded more than Kalakuta Republic that was located behind Celebrity department was because unlike Kalakuta Republic, 411 Republic was invaded almost everyday by the school security. And unlike Kalakuta Republic, 411 Republic wasn't Colonized. That is to say no Lecturer in the school paid 411 Republic a visit, never! Infact lecturers detested 411 Republic and Loved Kalakuta Republic. They Loved Kalakuta because it was the headquarters for everything smoke-able, ranging from Cigarrete to Weed to Cigarillo to Cigar to C'.ocaine to Cow dung, and the likes. Some Lecturers that were smokers fought for the establishment of Kalakuta Republic, so it was established 3years after NU kicked off, and a year after 411 Republic was established albeit illegit.

Flow spat Saliva to the ground as they walked through the narrow road that led to 411 Republic, he never dreamt that one day he would visit the infamous 411 Republic, the only Republic he was a "registered" member was Kalakuta Republic. Foxy, Skolopy and Madawaki were registered member of 411 republic, while Flow 4iko and Damex were patriotic Kalakutanites.

"ehmmmmm! this place dey smell s'hit" Flow complained.

"abi una dey s'hit for this bush?" He added.

"no oh! Na all this girls wey dey stay for that hostel dey throw short-put enter here oh" said Bin gbagbo.

"Short-put" was a NU slang said to refer to when someone poo on Polythene bag, that wasn't where the name was gotten from, the name was gotten from the act of throwing the poo just the way Short-put throwers do in Olympics. Students that stayed in off-campus hostels practiced Short-putting when they needed to poo and there was no water to flush the toilets. Short-putting was easy, less time consuming, and reliable.

"why them dey throw the s'hit enter school compound na" Flow was looking at the window of a bathroom upstairs, he was straining his eyes whether he could see any part of the body of a Lady taking her bath, he never knew he had stepped out of the narrow road.

"nyama!! Flow you don match s'hit" Chistar yelled.

"na lie!" Flow doubted.

"mumu!! See your leg, you don match ripe s'hit" Bin gbagbo made comedy out of Flow's condition and they laughed at him.

"ooooh God!! Which kin wahala be this na" Flow cried as he rubbed off the poo on the sole of his right shoe on the grasses.

"mumu! You dey look woman wey dey baf and you go match s'hit" Bin gbagbo continued laughing.

Flow thought it right to wear just his left foot of shoe to 411 Republic leaving the soiled right foot for God knows what.

As he limped into the Republic, Chamotex said to him; "where your second leg na?".

"na two leg i get na, abi na only one leg you dey see?" Flow answered staring down to confirm if he had lost a leg.

"i mean where your one leg of shoe?" Chamotex made the question lucid.

"okay, e don cut, i give shoemaker make him repair am" Flow lied.



Flow brought out his 3310 Nokia phone and said; "i wan bet with my phone oh".

"no wahala, but this your phone na 500naira you go bet am as oh" SeanT stated.




The game started with Flow's man Skolopy having an upper hand. Before a twinkle of Flow's eyes Skolopy had won 2000naira. Flow was over-joyous as Skolopy tossed the die with so much dexterity.

Before a twinkle of Flow's eyes again, Skolopy had won 6000naira, Flow paid Bin gbagbo the money he owed him and firmly held the remaining 1000naira like Gold.

Where trouble came for Flow was when the die ran out of the shade of the Mango tree into the bush.

"Make i go bring am" Flow stood up to go fetch the die.

He found the die, and as he bent down to pick it up........ "gboooooooooo!!" Short-put landed on his head.

"aaaaaaaah!! S'hit don land for Flow head" Bin gbagbo started laughing.

The short-put Polythene bag sat on Flow's head like a crown. And he looked more like Oba of Benin.



END OF CHAPTER 13



STILL I FLOW.

DaFuck!!! Ewww!!.. LWKMD!!, irritating ending, but really funny chapter in all. STILL YOU FLOW.

Weldone sa

badest guy flowey.... Weldone
if you are left till next year I know u will keep flowing.

chistar01: DaFuck!!! Ewww!!.. LWKMD!!, irritating ending, but really funny chapter in all. STILL YOU FLOW.

Thanks my man Chistar.

Firstgentleman, shedysworld you guys are next characters on my next chapter.

Disgusting.








Good 'Shittty' job.

*spits*





Have mercy Flow, I just ate

nyama lol at †he term shot-put

Shoooh. And unfortunately for some and fortunately for others Oga flow killed it big time and send haters on strike

My Oga Flow eh, for the whole nairaland eh...everybody dey learn for where yhur parol dey. You are too much bro...more inspiration to ur IQ.
I dey follow u anywhere u go...

Emiru: Shoooh. And unfortunately for some and fortunately for others Oga flow killed it big time and send haters "on strike"

My Oga Flow eh, for the whole nairaland eh...everybody dey learn for where yhur parol dey. You are too much bro...more inspiration to ur IQ.
I dey follow u anywhere u go...

hehehehe, i thought i was the only one that noticed that why una strike as Flow update? Hehehe...

Oga Flow keep flowing yhu tomuch, yhu don change well well oooh ....

Buh ah dey vex 4 u. . .u knw why?


U made me look ludicrous...

And u call my Best Moderator Abacha

make una come bak from strike ooh... Flow killed it big time

We Aren't Stopping Nor Going On Strike!!!


New Timetable

CHAPTER 14: HumbledBYGrace

CHAPTER 15: Dygeasy

CHAPTER 16: Xynerise

CHAPTER 17: MRBrownJay

CHAPTER 18: EzePromoe

CHAPTER 19: Flow1759


HumbledBYGrace Should Be Out With Her Chapter Soon I Hope. And Writers After Her Should Make Available Their Chapters ASAP After Hers.

Mazi_Omenuko Is Out. We Have To Come To Terms To It.

Ishilove Will Be Here As A Guest Writer. She'll Let Us Know Whenever She Wants To Drop A Chapter. Her Schedule Is Tight.


I Hope We All Keep Going.


Thanks All!!!


...dY'g...

Dygeasy: We Aren't Stopping Nor Going On Strike!!!


New Timetable

CHAPTER 14: HumbledBYGrace

CHAPTER 15: Dygeasy

CHAPTER 16: Xynerise

CHAPTER 17: MRBrownJay

CHAPTER 18: EzePromoe

CHAPTER 19: Flow1759


HumbledBYGrace Should Be Out With Her Chapter Soon I Hope. And Writers After Her Should Make Available Their Chapters ASAP After Hers.

Mazi_Omenuko Is Out. We Have To Come To Terms To It.

Ishilove Will Be Here As A Guest Writer. She'll Let Us Know Whenever She Wants To Drop A Chapter. Her Schedule Is Tight.


I Hope We All Keep Going.


Thanks All!!!


...dY'g...

I don forget say I dey write story o

Choi!

Emiru: Shoooh. And unfortunately for some and fortunately for others Oga flow killed it big time and send haters on strike

My Oga Flow eh, for the whole nairaland eh...everybody dey learn for where yhur parol dey. You are too much bro...more inspiration to ur IQ.
I dey follow u anywhere u go...

M kpuo gi ora eh

Dygeasy: Mazi_Omenuko Is Out. We Have To Come To Terms To It.

what is a great lost. The fear of Abacha.

Emiru: Shoooh. And unfortunately for some and fortunately for others Oga flow killed it big time and send haters on strike

My Oga Flow eh, for the whole nairaland eh...everybody dey learn for where yhur parol dey. You are too much bro...more inspiration to ur IQ.
I dey follow u anywhere u go...

Am glad you love my style.

Am not having haters here. I love all writers here: Humbledbygrace, Mazi Omenuko, Ishilove, xynerise, Mrbrownjay, Dygeasy, Eze promoe, in no particular order. Even if i disagreed with any of the writers mentioned, like they say; "we disagree to agree", such is life.

.... .....
hm!

even though i no dey read anything here i still dey follow sha. vewi surprising doh cos i go just find myself here sha.. hmm EJO LOWO NNU s/o to all tha writerz tho

Lol Thanks Promoe, i've always wondered what was in the missing Rule 17. You funny die my buloda


Flow...ewwww I'd actually love to keep my food down.
Nice update, except the shitttty part i had to skip

Una 2much o, i dey MPH(mad ppl home) cus my papa caught me lafin lyk a dog, abeg mr flow accept my 2go request, i don add u. I wan catch laughingitis

You guys have abandoned this, shei?