Lol Onegai!!

N1m a YEAR, not term oh, is perfectly "affordable" na.

The ongoing rate per term for the average private nursery here is about £4k per term (N1.8m) or £12k annually (N5.4m) inclusive of lunch, but exclusive of school uniforms / sporting kit, outdoor school trips, instrumental music lessons, etc.

So yeah, you guys have got a very good deal on your hands.

EfemenaXY:
Lol Onegai!!

N1m a YEAR, not term oh, is perfectly "affordable" na.

The ongoing rate per term for the average private nursery here is about £4k per term (N1.8m) or £12k annually (N5.4m) inclusive of lunch, but exclusive of school uniforms / sporting kit, outdoor school trips, instrumental music lessons, etc.

So yeah, you guys have got a very good deal on your hands.

Hian! My sister, I had to ask "please what magical brand of crayons are the babies using to colour??".
They wanted us to start checking out schools so we can put Baby E on some waiting lists. Those fees you mentioned, is how much LPS and St. Saviours and co, pay (and I hear LPS kids don't learn much and they're paying N2.1mil and St. Savours has a wait list longer than my arms).

A sitting governor's wife came to wish them good luck and they have events like Tea parties (to teach etiquette) and Proms where they get big musical stars to perform. And almost every child had the "right lastname" . But at least the good thing was, their Headboy and Headgirl gave speeches and they spoke better than most university graduates. Infact I had to tell the boy "you're gonna end up with the title "President" behind your name one day, whether Senate or Group CEO". And I hear it's a good feeder school for too secondary schools like Loyola and co. And continues upwards to a good Ivy League.

Let me add my 2kobo.

If you don't have the right surnames, they won't be the ones sitting with Adenuga and Tinubu. The best they will have is a very good education and poise which helps in grooming their future.

The kids might even grow with a complex. Even birthday parties of their best friends they won't get invited to as it's usually invitation by family. They won't attend the same events even when you go for summer holidays, it's not to the same places.

I am speaking from experience as my dad hustled to make something of himself and made it big at a very young age because of his intelligence. He made sure we went to the most exclusive schools at that time. It was really horrible growing up then because kids can be so mean.

I hope things are different for our kids now as there are upper middle class people that hustled to make it big and not from old money. I am not carried away by the hype. I just want my kids to have a lovely experience growing up and a good education to boot.

Onegai:

Hian! My sister, I had to ask "please what magical brand of crayons are the babies using to colour??".
They wanted us to start checking out schools so we can put Baby E on some waiting lists. Those fees you mentioned, is how much LPS and St. Saviours and co, pay (and I hear LPS kids don't learn much and they're paying N2.1mil and St. Savours has a wait list longer than my arms).
A sitting governor's wife came to wish them good luck and they have events like Tea parties (to teach etiquette) and Proms where they get big musical stars to perform. And almost every child had the "right lastname" . But at least the good thing was, their Headboy and Headgirl gave speeches and they spoke better than most university graduates. Infact I had to tell the boy "you're gonna end up with the title "President" behind your name one day, whether Senate or Group CEO". And I hear it's a good feeder school for too secondary schools like Loyola and co. And continues upwards to a good Ivy League.

I totally get where you're coming from but at the end of the day, it really depends on what you (and dad) want for Baby E. The key thing is ensuring you get the right balance of academic tuition versus pastoral care. Some schools are more academically inclined while other tilt more towards pastoral care / sports, or others offer both at a 50:50 ratio. It really depends on your child's capability and what you as their parent feels is priority.

One of the advantages of going private are the smaller class sizes. Take here for example, the average class size is 30 pupils per class (with 1 teacher and 1 Teaching Assistant {TA}) in the state school. But when you go private you get an average of 8 - 12 pupils per class. So the kids get a closer 1-to-1 attention from the teacher and the class size is more manageable.

Additionally, unlike their state school counterparts, each teacher has got the required university qualifications and experience to teach their precise subject. So you don't get instances of 1 teacher handling mathematics, English Language, French, Fine Art, Music, Spanish, etc.

I can't quite remember the exact statics but there was a report a few years ago detailing the percentage of private school pupils in the country and the percentage of those from that background bagging the top jobs. I think it stated 6% of the entire population were private educated kids but yet 95% of those top most jobs were taken up by those who went through the private route.

Onegai, put baby E in on one of them jare. Don't worry about that white riding helmet you mentioned or her getting to marry Prince George...you never know it just might happen but you've gotta start right na, abi?

Onegai:
Hi Tearoses, thorpido, ifyalways. I had one funny gist to give o but I thought I'd shut it. Meanwhile, I attended the Graduation Ceremony for a Nursery and Primary school and, let me put this way to describe the type of ceremony: the schoolfees for the Nursery school is N1mil per annum, per child and that is an affordable school o.

Jokes aside, it made me think of how much social circle influence things. Whether we like it or not, there are certain places not accessible to an average person. Those kids in that school are not going to be running around looking for a job one day. They will be on the board of directors for companies and you will never hear of them (though enough of them today had the right lastnames, all the ones that open doors in Nigeria). They will be the people sitting round the table with Wale Tinubu and Dangote, allowing those ones to take the glory whilst quietly putting away a fortune. And they help themselves and marry themselves. Like my friend said "there are 5 lanes in Nigeria, you can cross from lakes 4-5 easier, lane 3 is a little harder, but lane 1 and 2 can only dream and imagine things".

Btw, that N1mil for Nursery schoolfees, people actually told me it was affordable. When your kid attends a school where the entrance fee (not regular schoolfees) is N4mil

Affordable?Hmmmm.
To think some parents even have 2 or 3kids in the same school.
Sure those kids are not going to be job hunting.They are going to be board members of their father's or mother's companies or have a consultancy business.They will roll in their circles and marry themselves.
Nursery/primary is very important in a child's foundation and if one can afford it,it's not a waste to spend that money but N1m per annum is

Blank, what you've said is totally true and I actually remember I know someone who was in that same situation. It was purely by accident I found out she attended the school (because I was friends with those who did and they never spoke to her, even though she was in their set). She's still more comfortable in her home environment than in the environment she was supposed to fit in. Some other kids, blend sometimes that you don't realise where they started from. And yes, children can be quite cruel.

Sadly, people still look at things like old and new money, for certain things, less so for Business but more so for Marriage. Or they call them "Nameless", that is "that girl is nameless, I can't marry her". Stvpidly the person saying that may actually be poorer than the girl but has the comfort of a popular last name. Slangs like "Rich kid" are very common in the Dating scene.

EfemenaXY:


I totally get where you're coming from but at the end of the day, it really depends on what you (and dad) want for Baby E. The key thing is ensuring you get the right balance of academic tuition versus pastoral care. Some schools are more academically inclined while other tilt more towards pastoral care / sports, or others offer both at a 50:50 ratio. It really depends on your child's capability and what you as their parent feels is priority.

One of the advantages of going private are the smaller class sizes. Take here for example, the average class size is 30 pupils per class (with 1 teacher and 1 Teaching Assistant {TA}) in the state school. But when you go private you get an average of 8 - 12 pupils per class. So the kids get a closer 1-to-1 attention from the teacher and the class size is more manageable.

Additionally, unlike their state school counterparts, each teacher has got the required university qualifications and experience to teach their precise subject. So you don't get instances of 1 teacher handling mathematics, English Language, French, Fine Art, Music, Spanish, etc.

I can't quite remember the exact statics but there was a report a few years ago detailing the percentage of private school pupils in the country and the percentage of those from that background bagging the top jobs. I think it stated 6% of the entire population were private educated kids but yet 95% of those top most jobs were taken up by those who went through the private route.

Onegai, put baby E in on one of them jare. Don't worry about that white riding helmet you mentioned or her getting to marry Prince George...you never know it just might happen but you've gotta start right na, abi?

It's true sha about that statistic of 6% in the right schools and 90% of those kids end up running the country. And Kate Middleton will definitely be screening girls carefully for Prince George (people who clawed and climbed their way up the social ladder are very touchy about letting others get there as well ). So we really have to start right, sigh

If no-one sees me on NL, it's because we are paying schoolfees and I can't afford to pay for data on my phone Princess Baby E, Duchess of blah blah, has to happen.

Im not really sure about this one as I dont know what the nursery are teaching

So much has changed over the years and there are so many other ways to make money these days
If you can easily afford private education, then go for it, as the education is better, however the focus on the word easily.

Many parents are going without and working hundreds of hours just to put their kids into private school. I will say don't bother. The kid wont thank you later. There is also no guarantee that the kid will use that private education in the way that you will expect.

I was watching the London to Lagos to program on Channel 4 the other day and all the rich kids focussed in the program did not work in corporate. One of the Odetolas kids is a Dj and the other is a fashion blogger and the twins featured in the program were event planners after all their private education. One may argue that they are planning parties for rich peeps, so do other people who never tasted private education or even any formal education. I have an aunty that didn't go to any higher institution but her grammer and poise is more than mine

I want to believe that there comes a point where companies choose people who are suitable for the job and not just because of your surname, even in Nigeria.

Nowadays you dont even need a degree to earn mega bucks even in corporate. IT is a good example. A friend of mine took her PHD off her CV to get into a BA job.

As a parent I would spend more time on ensuring that the kid is an allrounder, for example being able to play at least one musical instrument, well travelled, exposed and very balanced psychologically. When a kid is happy and confident, they are able to hold on their own anywhere they find themselves and have the zeal to succeed wherever they find themselves.

This is why I don't agree with people who work and work and they are never at home because they want to put the kid into private school. But that is my opinion. The school can only do so much, You as a parent need to do much too.

As regards Nursery, unless you are 100% sure that you are not just paying for babysitting then you shouldn't be paying more than average.
My nephews in Abj pay about 1M per annum but they are in primary school and that's understandable as everything in Abj is expensive. The parents are very handson and in fairness I do see the overall impact.

Tearoses, what you've said is absolutely spot-on. It depends also on the parent. At that Graduation Ceremony, the best student (a girl) also won several prizes for subjects. Parents rushed to congratulate her parents and asked for the contact info of their lesson teacher(s), So they could hire them for their own kids and see results. They were all surprised to find out that the girl had no lesson teachers. Those parents were still looking to outsource their roles as parents, thinking that throwing a bucket of money at the problem for results, rather than their presence.

As per the Otedola girls not working, I'm not shocked at it. Okoya's daughter got married and everyone congratulated the dude wedding her and were surprised to find out she was jobhunting. No-one would really hire her either because she's an Okoya (and Daddy may have pissed them off in the past) or, she was NOT expected to work in Corporate. Rarely do I see the daughters of wealthy people working in the Corporate world after Marriage. They are expected to be Gracious Chateleines to their husbands and run the home and his social calendar, not be CEOs. It's actually uncommon. They can afford to be socialites and be SaHMs so no-one expects them to be hustling a 9-5 that is demanding. Even the one i knew who has an MBa, her Dad bypassed her to pick his son who's younger than her and doesn't have that qualification to run the company. Zahra Buhari is going to run a charity one day, not an oil company. And they will be expected to marry well, and help Daddy forge alliances with the right family. Which is why, no matter how devout or comfy a Yoruba Muslim is, he cannot aspire to wed a Hausa-Fulani girl from a wealthy home. She's been promised to someone else.

tearoses:


I want to believe that there comes a point where companies choose people who are suitable for the job and not just because of your surname, even in Nigeria.

Unfortunately this is not true. I have a friend who didn't make the right contacts during his schooldays, even though he went to a prestigious University abroad. He couldn't get to the interview stage for any oil and gas firm in Nigeria. The day he met my friends and realised that even though they worked in O&G, almost all of them hadn't bothered to get even a Masters from anywhere, he nearly wept. I mean, one of them did Industrial Training at a desk, got posted to NYSC at the same desk and afterwards resumed full time work at the exact same spot. Another used his contacts to get a plum job at an oil coy, even though he had an extra year and finished with a 2-2. Ask any Nigerian student, they will tell you that you cannot even attend an interview at an oil coy with those issues, yet I had classmates who are successfully planted there. All their contacts and networking came from Family and School. And there was my friend, jobless, with his pretty degree.

Onegai:
Tearoses, what you've said is absolutely spot-on. It depends also on the parent. At that Graduation Ceremony, the best student (a girl) also won several prizes for subjects. Parents rushed to congratulate her parents and asked for the contact info of their lesson teacher(s), So they could hire them for their own kids and see results. They were all surprised to find out that the girl had no lesson teachers. Those parents were still looking to outsource their roles as parents, thinking that throwing a bucket of money at the problem for results, rather than their presence.
As per the Otedola girls not working, I'm not shocked at it. Okoya's daughter got married and everyone congratulated the dude wedding her and were surprised to find out she was jobhunting. No-one would really hire her either because she's an Okoya (and Daddy may have pissed them off in the past) or, she was NOT expected to work in Corporate. Rarely do I see the daughters of wealthy people working in the Corporate world after Marriage. They are expected to be Gracious Chateleines to their husbands and run the home and his social calendar, not be CEOs. It's actually uncommon. They can afford to be socialites and be SaHMs so no-one expects them to be hustling a 9-5 that is demanding. Even the one i knew who has an MBa, her Dad bypassed her to pick his son who's younger than her and doesn't have that qualification to run the company. Zahra Buhari is going to run a charity one day, not an oil company. And they will be expected to marry well, and help Daddy forge alliances with the right family. Which is why, no matter how devout or comfy a Yoruba Muslim is, he cannot aspire to wed a Hausa-Fulani girl from a wealthy home. She's been promised to someone else.

I get what you're saying but these examples you've given are of kids from elite classes. Granted I don't know the dynamics of how it works within the Nigerian environment but even then surely private schools back there aren't the exclusive preserve of the super rich with billionaire parents?

So that group aside, how does it work for the middle class / upper middle class kids that go through the private route? I'd like to believe that even at that level, the girls graduating from those schools aspire for high end careers and not become glorified housewives? Otherwise what would have been the essence of sending them to such schools in the first place?

Many of the top end female politicians in palariment went through the private route or grammar schools.

Onegai:
Tearoses, what you've said is absolutely spot-on. It depends also on the parent. At that Graduation Ceremony, the best student (a girl) also won several prizes for subjects. Parents rushed to congratulate her parents and asked for the contact info of their lesson teacher(s), So they could hire them for their own kids and see results. They were all surprised to find out that the girl had no lesson teachers. Those parents were still looking to outsource their roles as parents, thinking that throwing a bucket of money at the problem for results, rather than their presence.

As per the Otedola girls not working, I'm not shocked at it. Okoya's daughter got married and everyone congratulated the dude wedding her and were surprised to find out she was jobhunting. No-one would really hire her either because she's an Okoya (and Daddy may have pissed them off in the past) or, she was NOT expected to work in Corporate. Rarely do I see the daughters of wealthy people working in the Corporate world after Marriage. They are expected to be Gracious Chateleines to their husbands and run the home and his social calendar, not be CEOs. It's actually uncommon. They can afford to be socialites and be SaHMs so no-one expects them to be hustling a 9-5 that is demanding. Even the one i knew who has an MBa, her Dad bypassed her to pick his son who's younger than her and doesn't have that qualification to run the company. Zahra Buhari is going to run a charity one day, not an oil company. And they will be expected to marry well, and help Daddy forge alliances with the right family. Which is why, no matter how devout or comfy a Yoruba Muslim is, he cannot aspire to wed a Hausa-Fulani girl from a wealthy home. She's been promised to someone else.

This is one of the main reasons why their marriages don’t last
The girls don’t work and just have a social life and depend on their husband to pay their bills
The husband can’t always afford it or feels that the bills are excessive then dad steps in to give his daughter or the husband money , this pissies the husband off and then that’s the beginning of the end.
It’s a shame because these women are educated in the finest schools but just can’t work.
Either no one takes them on or the parents themselves don’t want their daughter working just for anyone. You know our people and "What will people say" syndrome
Sometimes coming from a mega rich or popular family has its own downsides.

EfemenaXY:




I get what you're saying but these examples you've given are of kids from elite classes. Granted I don't know the dynamics of how it works within the Nigerian environment but even then surely private schools back there aren't the exclusive preserve of the super rich with billionaire parents?

So that group aside, how does it work for the middle class / upper middle class kids that go through the private route? I'd like to believe that even at that level, the girls graduating from those schools aspire for high end careers and not become glorified housewives? Otherwise what would have been the essence of sending them to such schools in the first place?

Many of the top end female politicians in palariment went through the private route or grammar schools.

Hmm, the upper middle class girls who attended these schools have more leeway, some work and some don't. But they are still given a cushy landing at their jobs and they run successful businesses. Some get fasttracked to the company's Board of Directors. But yeah, most of them I know, I see them at the gym, at the supermarket, at the right weddings and parties. Not really at the office, slaving away till 9pm like most bankers. Ikoyi club, for example, has a law that says no more maids or Nannies on the premises escorting children. So who will take off work to take Junior and Pretty to Swimming or Tennis lessons? Mummy or Daddy? I mean, that was why Mummy went to N3.5mil per annum school, so she could sit beside Daddy and marry him and not some random dude who can't afford to pay for Ikoyi club membership dues.

It depends on the private school. School on the mainland, N650,000 per annum cannot be compared to school on the island at N8mil per annum. So the sentence "I went to private school in Nigeria" has to be qualified by the name of the school before anyone gets impressed. Private schools have become the new Designer handbag.

Meanwhile, for all those who like to complain about shabbily-dressed Nannies, relax. At the Graduation Ceremony, most of the Nannies wore uniforms so you certainly knew whom they were.

And enough trophy wives! Mehnnn! I saw one and was like "surely she's not someone's Mummy". Then they called her child and she went forward, with her elderly husband. Himself started laughing when I smiled approvingly at them

Onegai:


Unfortunately this is not true. I have a friend who didn't make the right contacts during his schooldays, even though he went to a prestigious University abroad. He couldn't get to the interview stage for any oil and gas firm in Nigeria. The day he met my friends and realised that even though they worked in O&G, almost all of them hadn't bothered to get even a Masters from anywhere, he nearly wept. I mean, one of them did Industrial Training at a desk, got posted to NYSC at the same desk and afterwards resumed full time work at the exact same spot. Another used his contacts to get a plum job at an oil coy, even though he had an extra year and finished with a 2-2. Ask any Nigerian student, they will tell you that you cannot even attend an interview at an oil coy with those issues, yet I had classmates who are successfully planted there. All their contacts and networking came from Family and School. And there was my friend, jobless, with his pretty degree.

Eventually the wheat will be separated from the chaff
The quality of the people in corporate now is really high
So many foreign degrees around. I've stopped counting the number of family members/family friends whose children have come here for their Masters. Yesterday I was at one of my aburos PHD graduation.

You can get in by the back door but can you sustain it?
When you are bringing the whole team down, people will start to talk
When you cant do the job you were employed for, you will be eventually sacked.

One of my aburos told me how in his bank, the managers used to line all up all the back door entry staff on top of the desk every week and tell them that he knows how they all got in and sometimes even names their godfathers and tell them that he will fire them if they didn't pull up their socks.

tearoses:


Eventually the wheat will be separated from the chaff
The quality of the people in corporate now is really high
So many foreign degrees around. I've stopped counting the number of family members/family friends whose children have come here for their Masters. Yesterday I was at one of my aburos PHD graduation.

You can get in by the back door but can you sustain it?
When you are bringing the whole team down, people will start to talk
When you cant do the job you were employed for, you will be eventually sacked.

One of my aburos told me how in his bank, the managers used to line all up all the back door entry staff on top of the desk every week and tell them that he knows how they all got in and sometimes even names their godfathers and tell them that he will fire them if they didn't pull up their socks.

That's cold mehn but yeah, so many people can now afford a foreign degree, it no longer makes people stand out.

Did you ever hear of that HR guy last year that tweeted asking for CVs from international students only, for a banking job? I met some lady who said her company only hired international or private uni grads because they're more disciplined.

Onegai:


That's cold mehn but yeah, so many people can now afford a foreign degree, it no longer makes people stand out.

Did you ever hear of that HR guy last year that tweeted asking for CVs from international students only, for a banking job? I met some lady who said her company only hired international or private uni grads because they're more disciplined.

I didn't hear about that.
If I were an employer, I would favour someone with international experience, not because of the degree but for the work ethic.
I used to run a business in Nigeria, and the excuses I hear for staff lateness or absence are so absurd that they are unbelievable.

One was asking for permission to skip work for the first 3 days of every month for a prayer and fasting church program.
And who are these pastors calling for 11am daily services anyway? Don't their church members work?

I guess Its not the employees fault, but that's just they way it is, but it seems very foreign to me.

People sleeping on duty because they have nothing to do. Is there ever nothing to do?
People holding prayer meetings and services during office hours in the office
People coming to work to sell their food & wares, before starting work
People not at their desk
People attending to their own personal visitors during office hours
People leaving work to attend to their own personal affairs during office house
People taking 3 hour lunch breaks

All these things don't sit well with me, so if I was a recruiter I would probably go for someone who does not consider this as being professional.

Onegai:
Tearoses, what you've said is absolutely spot-on. It depends also on the parent. At that Graduation Ceremony, the best student (a girl) also won several prizes for subjects. Parents rushed to congratulate her parents and asked for the contact info of their lesson teacher(s), So they could hire them for their own kids and see results. They were all surprised to find out that the girl had no lesson teachers. Those parents were still looking to outsource their roles as parents, thinking that throwing a bucket of money at the problem for results, rather than their presence.

As per the Otedola girls not working, I'm not shocked at it. Okoya's daughter got married and everyone congratulated the dude wedding her and were surprised to find out she was jobhunting. No-one would really hire her either because she's an Okoya (and Daddy may have pissed them off in the past) or, she was NOT expected to work in Corporate. Rarely do I see the daughters of wealthy people working in the Corporate world after Marriage. They are expected to be Gracious Chateleines to their husbands and run the home and his social calendar, not be CEOs. It's actually uncommon. They can afford to be socialites and be SaHMs so no-one expects them to be hustling a 9-5 that is demanding. Even the one i knew who has an MBa, her Dad bypassed her to pick his son who's younger than her and doesn't have that qualification to run the company. Zahra Buhari is going to run a charity one day, not an oil company. And they will be expected to marry well, and help Daddy forge alliances with the right family. Which is why, no matter how devout or comfy a Yoruba Muslim is, he cannot aspire to wed a Hausa-Fulani girl from a wealthy home. She's been promised to someone else.

@bolded,Kola Abiola wanted to marry Babangida's daughter.I learnt it was Maryam who kicked against it because she didn't want her to be second wife but their relationship was that deep.

Onegai:
Meanwhile, for all those who like to complain about shabbily-dressed Nannies, relax. At the Graduation Ceremony, most of the Nannies wore uniforms so you certainly knew whom they were.

And enough trophy wives! Mehnnn! I saw one and was like "surely she's not someone's Mummy". Then they called her child and she went forward, with her elderly husband. Himself started laughing when I smiled approvingly at them

The trophy wives who are probably going to groom their daughters to aspire for the 'prize' too.That man must have looked at you like,'you got it'.

thorpido:
@bolded,Kola Abiola wanted to marry Babangida's daughter.I learnt it was Maryam who kicked against it because she didn't want her to be second wife but their relationship was that deep.

Do you know i was about to mention Abiola? Maryam herself is originally from Asaba. You won't see core Northerners like Indimi and Dantata wedding outside their tribes and social group. Like you won't hear an Okoya marrying one of the old Northern families. It's the same across different tribes: the older the money, the more they would rather their daughter/son get someone they know (and I'm speaking from experience). Even in old Yoruba families, though they are not as rigid (but they will show the outsider pepper sha). Even one Ijaw guy that was in an ivy league, one Senator from old money from his side insisted on giving him a huge scholarship and visiting him a lot in school and eventually started bringing his daughter along. His father was totally complicit in the matter.

They groom themselves to marry from their social circle.

thorpido:
The trophy wives who are probably going to groom their daughters to aspire for the 'prize' too.That man must have looked at you like,'you got it'.

But of course! Do you know how many people that their parents tell them "don't bring home a nonetity"? Or those that teach their daughters from childhood who is an acceptable boyfriend or not. They are so plenty. Those trophy wives will screen their kids' friends down to the last. Even amongst big guys, if they are your mentor they will help you select a bride that will place your feet higher. I heard a tale of some popular Businessman who had a PA he liked. When one of his billionaire friends brought his daughter home, he pushed his PA at her. The PA refused and said "I have a gf of about 3 years, you know her, blah blah". His boss replied him "there are a million pretty girls like that once you make your fortune, but your wife is an investment into your future". And that was that. It is soooo common that it is funnier to see people denying doing it than the actual deed.

Onegai:


Do you know i was about to mention Abiola? Maryam herself is originally from Asaba. You won't see core Northerners like Indimi and Dantata wedding outside their tribes and social group. Like you won't hear an Okoya marrying one of the old Northern families. It's the same across different tribes: the older the money, the more they would rather their daughter/son get someone they know (and I'm speaking from experience). Even in old Yoruba families, though they are not as rigid (but they will show the outsider pepper sha). Even one Ijaw guy that was in an ivy league, one Senator from old money from his side insisted on giving him a huge scholarship and visiting him a lot in school and eventually started bringing his daughter along. His father was totally complicit in the matter.

They groom themselves to marry from their social circle.

I agree with the old money.Those ones can't even hear that you're picking someone from outside.They literarily hook themselves up.I doubt if their daughters are happy when they marry but they don't seem to have much of a choice.
For people like Babangida who acquired the money while in the army and politicians/businessmen,they might be a bit flexible.

Onegai:


But of course! Do you know how many people that their parents tell them "don't bring home a nonetity"? Or those that teach their daughters from childhood who is an acceptable boyfriend or not. They are so plenty. Those trophy wives will screen their kids' friends down to the last. Even amongst big guys, if they are your mentor they will help you select a bride that will place your feet higher. I heard a tale of some popular Businessman who had a PA he liked. When one of his billionaire friends brought his daughter home, he pushed his PA at her. The PA refused and said "I have a gf of about 3 years, you know her, blah blah". His boss replied him "there are a million pretty girls like that once you make your fortune, but your wife is an investment into your future". And that was that. It is soooo common that it is funnier to see people denying doing it than the actual deed.

So the guy dumped his old girlfriend?
I guess in that upper echelon,love is not as important as the money and connections.No wonder there's a lot of 'away' matches going on there from both sides.

That's what I thought at first but then you have to factor the minimum wage in Nigeria which is 18,000 and then you see it's expensive by Nigerian standards.

If I was to send my kid from here to school at home, I wouldn't consider it expensive because when you make the money in dollars and convert it to naira, it doesn't bite as much. Say $4K a year going by the current exchange rates. That's a real steal.

But For a Nigerian being paid in naira, it's expensive.

EfemenaXY:
Lol Onegai!!

N1m a YEAR, not term oh, is perfectly "affordable" na.

The ongoing rate per term for the average private nursery here is about £4k per term (N1.8m) or £12k annually (N5.4m) inclusive of lunch, but exclusive of school uniforms / sporting kit, outdoor school trips, instrumental music lessons, etc.

So yeah, you guys have got a very good deal on your hands.

Onegai:

But of course! Do you know how many people that their parents tell them "don't bring home a nonetity"? Or those that teach their daughters from childhood who is an acceptable boyfriend or not. They are so plenty. Those trophy wives will screen their kids' friends down to the last. Even amongst big guys, if they are your mentor they will help you select a bride that will place your feet higher. I heard a tale of some popular Businessman who had a PA he liked. When one of his billionaire friends brought his daughter home, he pushed his PA at her. The PA refused and said "I have a gf of about 3 years, you know her, blah blah". His boss replied him "there are a million pretty girls like that once you make your fortune, but your wife is an investment into your future". And that was that. It is soooo common that it is funnier to see people denying doing it than the actual deed.

Kai see calculation

And they say its only women that scheme.

cococandy:
That's what I thought at first but then you have to factor the minimum wage in Nigeria which is 18,000 and then you see it's expensive by Nigerian standards.

If I was to send my kid from here to school at home, I wouldn't consider it expensive because when you make the money in dollars and convert it to naira, it doesn't bite as much. Say $4K a year going by the current exchange rates. That's a real steal.

But For a Nigerian being paid in naira, it's expensive.

Even subsidised schooling in Lagos can't be covered by that minim wage. One taxi man told me his boys had to pay N5000 for something about their result and the next term. I think it was some new scratchcard. And that was a school in Ilasamaja

Onegai:


Even subsidised schooling in Lagos can't be covered by that minim wage. One taxi man told me his boys had to pay N5000 for something about their result and the next term. I think it was some new scratchcard. And that was a school in Ilasamaja

Minimum wage is a joke.

Honestly. I wonder if those responsible for fixing such things ever think about it. Something that can't even buy you a bag of rice in the present economic conditions.

Lord have mercy.

damiso:


Kai see calculation

And they say its only women that scheme.

It's when they start denying it that it gets funny. I know someone whom that is what his clique members/awon boys do. 3 have been successful so far. And it always plays out in the same way.

Guy: "where do you stay?"
Babe: "Ikoyi, around Bourdillon, with my dad/Banana Island with my mum/Nicon town in the family house"

Gbam! He will call you back that night, no collecting your number and disappearing, no mago mago. Expect a 2nd date soon. The next day most likely.

Guy: "where do I drop you off"
Babe: "I live in Lekki 1"
Guy (soft smile): "really, I've got some friends there. Where?"
Babe: "Fola Osibo, in a self-contained BQ"

He will follow you home, bring his condom, but leave any thought of an engagement ring behind and spend the next 8 months "wondering" if you are The One (to your chagrin).

Guy: "where do I direct the taxi to take you to?"
Babe: "Festac/Iyana Ipaja/Egbeda/Fadeyi"
Guy: "wow, that's really far o"

Translation: "wow, that's really far, your father better be the owner of Chisco or Young Shall Grow or be a Customs controller of a Port somewhere because I ain't driving that far for nurring. Geh, ah don't do bridges"

If na lie I talk, make I fall for gutter

tearoses:
Im not really sure about this one as I dont know what the nursery are teaching

So much has changed over the years and there are so many other ways to make money these days
If you can easily afford private education, then go for it, as the education is better, however the focus on the word easily.

Many parents are going without and working hundreds of hours just to put their kids into private school. I will say don't bother. The kid wont thank you later. There is also no guarantee that the kid will use that private education in the way that you will expect.

I was watching the London to Lagos to program on Channel 4 the other day and all the rich kids focussed in the program did not work in corporate. One of the Odetolas kids is a Dj and the other is a fashion blogger and the twins featured in the program were event planners after all their private education. One may argue that they are planning parties for rich peeps, so do other people who never tasted private education or even any formal education. I have an aunty that didn't go to any higher institution but her grammer and poise is more than mine

I want to believe that there comes a point where companies choose people who are suitable for the job and not just because of your surname, even in Nigeria.

Nowadays you dont even need a degree to earn mega bucks even in corporate. IT is a good example. A friend of mine took her PHD off her CV to get into a BA job.

As a parent I would spend more time on ensuring that the kid is an allrounder, for example being able to play at least one musical instrument, well travelled, exposed and very balanced psychologically. When a kid is happy and confident, they are able to hold on their own anywhere they find themselves and have the zeal to succeed wherever they find themselves.

This is why I don't agree with people who work and work and they are never at home because they want to put the kid into private school. But that is my opinion. The school can only do so much, You as a parent need to do much too.

As regards Nursery, unless you are 100% sure that you are not just paying for babysitting then you shouldn't be paying more than average.
My nephews in Abj pay about 1M per annum but they are in primary school and that's understandable as everything in Abj is expensive. The parents are very handson and in fairness I do see the overall impact.

I actually know a couple who are having serious issues because of private school. They both agreed to take the children out of State school and put them in private school ( I have a feeling wifey was the driver cos she disses state schools at every opportunity). Hubby has another child from a previous relationship that he is still somewhat supporting. After one year hubby is really struggling ( after taking on a second job) and is saying he thinks they should withdraw them back to state school. Wifey is lamenting to me that he backed out of an agreement and thinks the main issue is the fact that he is supporting this other child who is in final year of Uni( who went to state school). She is really upset and so mad at him.

I would also love for my children to go to private school ( I think I have shared that on here so many times) but at the moment we could not comfortably afford it( by comfortably I mean if one of lost our jobs by the 2nd year we would probably be struggling). I feel her pain and understand the need to want to give your children the best. I however don't see the point if you are really struggling to do it. I would love to say that but don't what to say without it seeming like its cos my own children are in state school. If you can afford it, it definitely would not cause friction you just do it. Some people sacrifice a lot for it but this person still wants the same standard of living i.e. at least 2 holidays a year ,new cars on finance etc. I told her to speak to him about it in a less confrontational manner and for them to look at all their living expenses closely together and see how they could reach a consensus. I know she would pay the fees by herself if she could( I would too without moaning or resenting my husband for it that's how much I value a good education) but it seems she cant afford it. They live in a good state school district ( Kent) but she insists all the state schools around them are rubbish.

I think for networking, class size to teacher ratio and a lot of other factors Private schools are well worth it. But like you said if you had to live in constant financial tension, have lil to zero life to get it ( City Traders can comfortably send 4 children with their bonuses alone sef ) its not worth it. Like a lot of people advised me , try to get into the relatively good state schools, be there for them( your time)invest in extra curricular that they are interested in, get extra tuition if necessary and generally build them up to be well rounded individuals.

Schools matter ALOT but so also does parental input.

Onegai:


It's when they start denying it that it gets funny. I know someone whom that is what his clique members/awon boys do. 3 have been successful so far. And it always plays out in the same way.

Guy: "where do you stay?"
Babe: "Ikoyi, around Bourdillon, with my dad/Banana Island with my mum/Nicon town in the family house"

Gbam! He will call you back that night, no collecting your number and disappearing, no mago mago. Expect a 2nd date soon. The next day most likely.

Guy: "where do I drop you off"
Babe: "I live in Lekki 1"
Guy (soft smile): "really, I've got some friends there. Where?"
Babe: "Fola Osibo, in a self-contained BQ"

He will follow you home, bring his condom, but leave any thought of an engagement ring behind and spend the next 8 months "wondering" if you are The One (to your chagrin).

Guy: "where do I direct the taxi to take you to?"
Babe: "Festac/Iyana Ipaja/Egbeda/Fadeyi"
Guy: "wow, that's really far o"

Translation: "wow, that's really far, your father better be the owner of Chisco or Young Shall Grow or be a Customs controller of a Port somewhere because I ain't driving that far for nurring. Geh, ah don't do bridges"

If na lie I talk, make I fall for gutter

I feel you jare

Was there in my time but my sister said it got faaar worse.

She toldme God knows how many ' I don't cross the bridge' she heard in her time

damiso:


I feel you jare

Was there in my time but my sister said it got faaar worse.

She toldme God knows how many ' I don't cross the bridge' she heard in her time

Very annoying
Someone told me that
We used to work together and thenthe person moved to Naija
Next thing I heard was " I don't leave the island"
Abeg piss off
was it not me and you who used to drink costa in the office canteen
me sef gan dont want to go to the island
Awolowo road traffic no be small thing

tearoses:


Very annoying
Someone told me that
We used to work together and thenthe person moved to Naija
Next thing I heard was " I don't leave the island"
Abeg piss off
was it not me and you who used to drink costa in the office canteen
me sef gan dont want to go to the island
Awolowo road traffic no be small thing

@piss off

I was not happy when they moved me from Ikeja to Vi when I worked in Naija.

Me that I used to wake up at 6.45 and still get to work by 8.