I know this sounds like a sweeping generalisation but I have found it to be true in almost all cases I have seen or experienced first hand. Why is it such a horrible, horrible thing to be married to a Nigerian man? Like there is a certain type of handbook the men read before becoming husbands.

Fine, a lot of newer generation men usually swear on their lives that they will never hurt their women but the moment they are settled into marraige, cheating begins. . . .as if this isnt the most painful kind of thing to do to your wife. And the people around them treat it like it is the norm.
I have hardly seen a Nigerian family (from my experience, especially yoruba people) who dont have one story or the other attached to their family name. The men always mess up! And in the most painful and ridiculous ways, I wonder how their women manage to have the patience and peseverance to stay eventhough most of them claim to still be there for their children.

I have an uncle. He's the kindest, most gentle and caring man I have ever met. If we werent related, he would be a very good model husband. We were so close. . .i discussed issues relating to my puberty with him instead of my mom. When he was getting married, I didnt go to his wedding because I was jealous. Later on, I met his wife and she suited him perfectly with her pretty smile. Very good woman, my heart melted when i met her.
Then a year into their marraige, I spent sometime at his house. I woke up one morning to find her crying. She refused to say why. I later learnt it was because she found out a woman had just given birth to a child for my uncle the week before. Meaning, he had sex with this woman a few months after their wedding.
I dont know how they resolved that issue but I was so dissapointed. I cannot fathom where she found the strenght to forge on.
Thats just my uncle o. . . . the kind and caring man. Talk less of many other Nigerian men.
Why?

Uhmmmmmm!

dis one serious ooo!

You go fear na!

spikedcylinder:

You go fear na!

I fear i no fit post!!
I reserve my comment!!haha

Why ask, that's just the way it is, men will be men and us women won't have it any other way. Not all men turn into monsters, especially those that have been raised well.

with all these all & about town, i'm thinking my father is the only one with sanity!

My mum always said trust issues & fidelity can never be their problem. Isn't she lucky?

Interesting, But while crucifying the male folks, y not leave some nails for the females. Heard bout a newly wedded couple, the husband travels out for a course, and the supposd wife starts going clubbing with her single friends. This lead to her sleeping around, and her husband found out when he got back. Everyone is guilty of this crime, so if it affects anyone of us, i suggest we all look for somepart of our marriage that makes us happy and ignore the excesses.

but not attending your Uncles Wedding because you were jealous.Hmmmmmmm

Nigerian men? Even my father is like that too  oooo. . . . But I cannot say also because my bf's father never did that to his wife and had been married for 38 years now.

We suppose fear oh

no be small thing.

snugle:

but not attending your Uncles Wedding because you were jealous.Hmmmmmmm

she wanted to be the one on the hightable wearing the white gown innit!

spike u be yeye girl!!!

My dad is also a Man's Man, never one to trifle with my mother's fragile heart.No wonder they've bin married for 33yrs.But seriously is the problem with the men or the women who fall prey to our advances even when they are involved in a very serious relationship.Hardly a week rolls by without somebody posting a thread on Nigerian men.If u ask me,i'd say the women should be apportioned a greater share of the blame because a lot of ladies(not all)have no scruples.they have lost all sense of decorum and more often than not seduce the men.
For the records,this is not just a Nigerian problem,it is a universal problem.

I have an uncle. He's the kindest, most gentle and caring man I have ever met.

The gentle ones, those that seem can't hurt a fly are the deadliest!

Make una leave me o! I was so in love with this my uncle ehn. I so did not look forward to the way he was going to bring his wife home for the first time. I ran away from the house and refused to go for his wedding. Yea, I know. . . I'm jealous like that.

Saw some posts.
The lenght of the marraige has nothing to do with it. Women are forever patient and full of peseverance. . . .I mean the older generation women o. The ones we have these days would tell you to go Bleep yourself!
There are too many stories I have heard about Nigerian families with the men being at the centre of it all. All too horrible.

offtopiking

Anyways, Men think its a natural thing and they cant "help" it

i wonde who teaches them these things!

jkpretty:

The gentle ones, those that seem can't hurt a fly are the deadliest!

Learnt this the hard way from my dad . . . by the time we found out how deadly the quiet ones are, it was already too late . . . slept with most of his staffs, neighbours (both married and university students) even slept with one uni chick i liked - na that one pain me pass - Heard she told someone, if she can get the money from the direct source, why should she be getting it indirectly 

@ poster

Most naija men are like that and the women in nigerian have come to accept it. So many women in naij knows their husbands are sleeping with other females but the fear of breaking up the marriage is the only reason they wont say anything, instead they'll prefer to look for the other lady and deal wit her.

They say they can't help it, rubbish, sorry for that woman

tboy1:

Learnt this the hard way from my dad . . . by the time we found out how deadly the quiet ones are, it was already too late . . . slept with most of his staffs, neighbours (both married and university students) even slept with one uni chick i liked - na that one pain me pass - Heard she told someone, if she can get the money from the direct source, why should she be getting it indirectly

@ poster

Most naija men are like that and the women in nigerian have come to accept it. So many women in naij knows their husbands are sleeping with other females but the fear of breaking up the marriage is the only reason they wont say anything, instead they'll prefer to look for the other lady and deal wit her.

Can you just imagine that? Imagine how hurt an humilated your mother must have felt? And these men do it without remorse!!!

off topic
ibkaye, how do you pronounce your id? Is it just plain old "I B K" or "eeb kar ye"?

not all men are like that okay.

    @spikedcylinder

why are you making all the girls scared for marriage huh?. why cant you keep this things to yourself.

I'm supposed to propose to Ibikaye today , you've just ruined my plans. Oh Shit

 

@TOPIC:

Until the philosophy which hold one race superior
And another
Inferior
Is finally
And permanently
Discredited
And abandoned -
Everywhere is war -
Me say war.

_{- Bob Marley (war)}

tboy1:

Learnt this the hard way from my dad . . . by the time we found out how deadly the quiet ones are, it was already too late . . . slept with most of his staffs, neighbours (both married and university students) even slept with one uni chick i liked - na that one pain me pass - Heard she told someone, if she can get the money from the direct source, why should she be getting it indirectly

@ poster

Most naija men are like that and the women in nigerian have come to accept it. So many women in naij knows their husbands are sleeping with other females but the fear of breaking up the marriage is the only reason they wont say anything, instead they'll prefer to look for the other lady and deal wit her.

before nko

What I find scary is the ease with which they have the affairs.

If you're in a relationship, shouldnt there be some kind of internal check that'll make you pause before you cheat on your partner?  

But some guys (and ladies) just seem to take pride in how much cheating they can get away with, instead of the other way round.


Is it really that hard to stay committed? In my opinion, this kind of thing just shows the lack of regard/respect you have for your SO.

And its not good when such stuff is always associated with a particular country.

Hmmmn. . . . . . naa waa!!

tboy1:

Learnt this the hard way from my dad . . . by the time we found out how deadly the quiet ones are, it was already too late . . . slept with most of his staffs, neighbours (both married and university students) even slept with one uni chick i liked - na that one pain me pass - Heard she told someone, if she can get the money from the direct source, why should she be getting it indirectly

@ poster

Most naija men are like that and the women in nigerian have come to accept it. So many women in naij knows their husbands are sleeping with other females but the fear of breaking up the marriage is the only reason they wont say anything, instead they'll prefer to look for the other lady and deal wit her.

I said it. . . the quiet ones are the most wicked!, silent killers!!

i'm surprised at all these tales, cos 99% of guys i know are faithful to the core! maybe i shld start hooking you all up, cos you are all threading in wrong places.haba!

spikedcylinder:

Can you just imagine that? Imagine how hurt an humilated your mother must have felt? And these men do it without remorse!!!

off topic
ibkaye, how do you pronounce your id? Is it just plain old "I B K" or "eeb kar ye"?

just plain old 'IBK'

dyabman:

not all men are like that okay.

@spikedcylinder

why are you making all the girls scared for marriage huh?. why can't you keep this things to yourself.

I'm supposed to propose to Ibikaye today , you've just ruined my plans. Oh Shit

I think most Men Became Monsters when dey are broke (Financially), thats when you see them yelling on their wives and acting strangely.

talk2medo:

I think most Men Became Monsters when dey are broke (Financially), thats when you see them yelling on their wives and acting strangely.

very funny, hahahahahaha

yemivictor:

But you guys should chill o!

When men cheat, they don't do it with fellow men now, do they!?

sometimes o, it is not impossible

@Ibikaye

what up with the fashionafrica stuff, do u sell cloths or are u a fashion designer?