...so, they say family is the very best thing. I totally agree with that (infact I wouldn't give up my family for anything). But in the world today, various things happen within this "simplest unit of the society". I actually read about the Redeemers University 21 yr old student that murdered his popps. The question is what could the dispute between them be that would lead to someone getting murdered.....so sardonic!!!

To the main topic, disputes and fights happen between husband and wife, brother and sister, dad and son, daughter and mother, aunt and neice, cousins.....

Some disputes I could actually think of are:
-Adultery
-Money palava
-Father getting angry at his son for not washing the car
-Father beating his son with a wooden spoon therefore infuriating the son
-Mother insulting her big girl daughter in front of visitors thus making the daughter angry
-Cousin quarrelling over a beautiful girl
(anybody can add more disputes that occur and let's talk about them too)

well my question now is how do we resolve these disputes before they turn into fights AND how do we take care of the fight caused by a dispute?? Do we take it to: the church, other family members, solve it between ourselves, go to a counsellor....?

Hmmm..This is a very important thread and should moved to front page.

Just like you stated in your post op, family dispute is caused by so many things and will like to add envyness to the once you stated in your post.

For me, I would say resolving disputes amongst families has to do with the kind of family involved. There are different families with different relationships that exist amongst them.

There are some things that will happen that a family can resolve within them, some they will have to involve relatives and all. Like my family, no matter what it is we don't bring in anybody when we have any dispute, we know ourselves.

Some families lack love amongst them. Love is something money cannot buy. I will rather marry an average man and have love and peace of mind to the fullest than marry a rich man and my house will become a village square were we settle fight all the time.

I feel relationship between parent and their kids, siblings among siblings and the society at large is important......... Can't talk much, a bad day for me already

MzMariah: Hmmm..This is a very important thread and should moved to front page.

Just like you stated in your post op, family dispute is caused by so many things and will like to add envyness to the once you stated in your post.

For me, I would say resolving disputes amongst families has to do with the kind of family involved. There are different families with different relationships that exist amongst them.

There are some things that will happen that a family can resolve within them, some they will have to involve relatives and all. Like my family, no matter what it is we don't bring in anybody when we have any dispute, we know ourselves.

Some families lack love amongst them. Love is something money cannot buy. I will rather marry an average man and have love and peace of mind to the fullest than marry a rich man and my house will become a village square were we settle fight all the time.

I feel relationship between parent and their kids, siblings among siblings and the society at large is important......... Can't talk much, a bad day fore already

hmmm...I respect ur thinking and the way u approach ur disputes...#salute and tnx 4 d contribution

Whenever my mum does something insulting to my sis in d presence of a visitor, she doesn't take it personal and keeps d insult to herself....I really respect her for that

different families, different dynamics.

freecharles: Whenever my mum does something insulting to my sis in d presence of a visitor, she doesn't take it personal and keeps d insult to herself....I really respect her for that

That's how it is suppose to be.

Imagine the 21 years old guy that murdered his dad...........Since when has it become a crime for a father to correct his child? For him to be able to do that it simply means in his family he is too big to be spoken to or corrected. that's why I say solving family dispute depends on the family and the relationship that exist between them.

tpia5: different families, different dynamics.

true but let's just take a single scenario out of all it say dispute caused by adultery and talk a lil' abt it and how u think a family can solve the sh!t

Over time, I have come to realise that not all family disputes can be resolved, this is greatly amplified in a polygamous family, and to an extent a monogamous family which may even consists of a very few close knit family members. Like you rightly said, there are a lots, lots of things that can bring discord in a family, some are self induced, like greed, wickedness, envy, et al, while others can be seen as an external negative spiritual manipulation. And it gets worse, when you have opposing factions within family members, amongst siblings!

I think that family disputes / rivalry, can best be resolved within. Bringing in an external person who is aversed to conflict resolution can be counter productive, u don't know what the individual has in mind. The HEAD of the family has a very important role to play in conflict resolutions, when he/she is not biased, conflicts can be resolved fast and effectively.

Family first my brother. Like they say, Blood is thicker than Water.

...........

MARKone: Over time, I have come to realise that not all family disputes can be resolved,

eod.

MARKone: Over time, I have come to realise that not all family disputes can be resolved, this is greatly amplified in a polygamous family, and to an extent a monogamous family which may even consists of a very few close knit family members. Like you rightly said, there are a lots, lots of things that can bring discord in a family, some are self induced, like greed, wickedness, envy, et al, while others can be seen as an external negative spiritual manipulation. And it gets worse, when you have opposing factions within family members, amongst siblings!

I think that family disputes / rivalry, can best be resolved within. Bringing in an external person who is aversed to conflict resolution can be counter productive, u don't know what the individual has in mind. The HEAD of the family has a very important role to play in conflict resolutions, when he/she is not biased, conflicts can be resolved fast and effectively.

Family first my brother. Like they say, Blood is thicker than Water.

father to son??....thats why I think tye case of tolani ajayi (d 21 yr old dt murdered his dad) is spiritual...LoL

.

Be it family or Friend , Neighbour or Stranger ....

As far as you are not thinking objectively and progressively then I will have to keep away from you no matter how bloodly close we are !!!

MARKone: Over time, I have come to realise that not all family disputes can be resolved, this is greatly amplified in a polygamous family, and to an extent a monogamous family which may even consists of a very few close knit family members. Like you rightly said, there are a lots, lots of things that can bring discord in a family, some are self induced, like greed, wickedness, envy, et al, while others can be seen as an external negative spiritual manipulation. And it gets worse, when you have opposing factions within family members, amongst siblings!

I think that family disputes / rivalry, can best be resolved within. Bringing in an external person who is aversed to conflict resolution can be counter productive, u don't know what the individual has in mind. The HEAD of the family has a very important role to play in conflict resolutions, when he/she is not biased, conflicts can be resolved fast and effectively.

Family first my brother. Like they say, Blood is thicker than Water.

Not all blood is thicker than water o

Se.un ose.wa I think you owe. Nailanders explanations why you choose to witch hunt ogugua and sexkilz. I have beeen following their case since morning from the thread she started with "jollof rice and pineaple" which has been deleted or hidden by you.
Now again the one she on romance section have been hidden by you.
She is not the reason why hackers hacked into NL neither is she responsible for changing ppls username.
If you had a crush on her beefore why not move on since she isn't into you. Stop behaving like a bully and come out clean on this case.
Is non of your biz if she chooses to date an ugly boy as u put it so please fuc.k off and give them peace.
Most NLs are following and watching the whole drama. Keep fooling yourself instead of minding your business.

MzMariah: That's how it is suppose to be.

Imagine the 21 years old guy that murdered his dad...........Since when has it become a crime for a father to correct his child? For him to be able to do that it simply means in his family he is too big to be spoken to or corrected. that's why I say solving family dispute depends on the family and the relationship that exist between them.

do u also agree with me that that case is spiritual

freecharles:

father to son??....thats why I think tye case of tolani ajayi (d 21 yr old dt murdered his dad) is spiritual...LoL

Tolani ajayi is a psychotic cold blooded killer, who might have orgasmed while dismembering his father. In his psychotic state of mind, that is the only way he could resolve the conflicts between him and his father. It may or may not be spiritual.

Not just between father and son, mother and daughter, brother killing brother. We should seriously pray against any thing than will bring rancour in our families.

Now ive pondered the reason why that happened and ave come to realize that it happens when parent(s) are standing in the way of their kids becoming 'big guy' or 'big girl' the reasons the Op gave agrees with that.
While some parents cant find much reason for this constant refusal/scolding cos they are afraid of what he/she may become,others do the right thing and make enemies of their children.some kids themselves,all this 'i wanna belong' itch,sometimes i wonder if its part of what is neccesary for a young man,etc is it by force.now i know materially,that dude was okay.so what could make him murder his dad.
Refusal to nt credit account
refusal to answer him if he doesnt do something.
Refusal to give him d keys to his car.
Or actually seizing the material possesions of the guy to make him submit.well overall its arrant nonsense to kill his dad,even if twas more than my reason above.at the end of the day,when eye don come down.na 'papa' e go dey cry!

freecharles:

do u also agree with me that that case is spiritual

From the thread I saw on why he hacked his father to death, I saw this....PREMIUM TIMES’ findings revealed that Tolani, a 300- level student of Department of History and International Relations of Redeemer University, Ogun State, was into drugs. He was said to have been caught twice by the authorities of the University. It was also gathered that the school had set up a panel to question him on alleged drug offence before he committed the murder.

It could be as a result of the drugs he took that day but if not, I strongly believe wickedness flows in his blood because he did not only kill his father, he also cut him into pieces, put the body inside a box and dumped it in a bush. He couldn't have all that in one hour and on the other hand, it may and may not be spiritual who knows.......only God knows what really went wrong.

MzMariah: From the thread I saw on why he hacked his father to death, I saw this....PREMIUM TIMES’ findings revealed that Tolani, a 300- level student of Department of History and International Relations of Redeemer University, Ogun State, was into drugs. He was said to have been caught twice by the authorities of the University. It was also gathered that the school had set up a panel to question him on alleged drug offence before he committed the murder.

It could be as a result of the drugs he took that day but if not, I strongly believe wickedness flows in his blood because he did not only kill his father, he also cut him into pieces, put the body inside a box and dumped it in a bush. He couldn't have all that in one hour and on the other hand, it may and may not be spiritual who knows.......only God knows what really went wrong.

Lord have mercy!!!...I didnt know he f@cking cut his dad into pieces...they cld have resolved without anybody dieing

3cycle: Se.un ose.wa I think you owe. Nailanders explanations why you choose to witch hunt ogugua and sexkilz. I have beeen following their case since morning from the thread she started with "jollof rice and pineaple" which has been deleted or hidden by you.
Now again the one she on romance section have been hidden by you.
She is not the reason why hackers hacked into NL neither is she responsible for changing ppls username.
If you had a crush on her beefore why not move on since she isn't into you. Stop behaving like a bully and come out clean on this case.
Is non of your biz if she chooses to date an ugly boy as u put it so please fuc.k off and give them peace.
Most NLs are following and watching the whole drama. Keep fooling yourself instead of minding your business.

Maybe he doesn't want sexkilz and ogugua on Nairaland anymore but the way he is going about it is childish and annoying.

freecharles:

Lord have mercy!!!...I didnt know he f@cking cut his dad into pieces...they cld have resolved without anybody dieing

That's why its good to know your children, build your family on love and trust.

Hmmmm....believe me, a guy who can't stand correction from his parent there must be traits of it in his attitude at home. imagine a guy whose dad and mum will say 1 thing and he will easy 10 things I believe he fights with his parent at home on a normal day because he said his father annoyed him by hitting him with a stick and he retaliated by using a kitchen knife and cutlass on him. They must have been seeing the traits but they chose to ignore it or who knows maybe that was why he was sent to a decent school ( Redeemer's university) to make him change for the better but....................

How can a child fight with his father? when my father is talking i dare not talk. talk what with which mouth and to who? even my mum does not say a word when dad is angry and talking them who am I to talk?

Lord have mercy. Things dey happen o, this na just the one wey we hear what about incidents we don't hear about? cases worst than this.

Issue: hw does a wife handle and settle with his adulterous husband

My family members are my GREATEST CRITIC. If the whole world tells me I am right and they say I am wrong, I will not believe the world but rather believe my family.

Even though we have our disputes like every other family, those period are always my darkest moments as I can hardly concentrate.

My family are the only people on earth I can give a loaded riffle and sleep with both eyes closed. Not that they might not shoot me but I will rather die by them than get stabbed by an outsider.


I pray and working hard to see my dreams coming true of buying a brand new RANGE Rover for all the female family of mine (3) and a brand new PRADO for the males (2).


My family get small wahala oh but I LOOOOVE THEM DIE!!!

freecharles: Issue: hw does a wife handle and settle with his adulterous husband

Is this another question?

Spiri what?
He's a mental case EOD.

Let's stop blaming spirits for human failings.
How many mental institutions do we have in this our dear country?
We only see people as mentally sick when they get obviously so. But there are lot of disturbed individuals who look normal living with us everyday.

freecharles:

do u also agree with me that that case is spiritual

MzMariah: Is this another question?

not really. its coined out of the main topic

freecharles:

not really. its coined out of the main topic

OK.

acidtalk:
My family are the only people on earth I can give a loaded riffle and sleep with both eyes closed.

me likey

Adulterous husband?

I will never do divorce in life so there is absolutely no way I'm going to let my house fall because he is cheating, im not going to invite anybody to settle any fight, no other person will hear about it, i won't fight with him either, we will be living fine just the way we use to, I will feed him well and not deny him of anything or his wright BUT.....my attitude will do it all. I'm an introvert. . that will do it all. He go hear am HOT.

I'm not married tho so I don't pray for such a husband

MzMariah: He go hear am HOT.

where is "thumbs up" emoticon on nairaland seun, make ah gv Mariah

3cycle: Se.un ose.wa I think you owe. Nailanders explanations why you choose to witch hunt ogugua and sexkilz. I have beeen following their case since morning from the thread she started with "jollof rice and pineaple" which has been deleted or hidden by you.
Now again the one she on romance section have been hidden by you.
She is not the reason why hackers hacked into NL neither is she responsible for changing ppls username.
If you had a crush on her beefore why not move on since she isn't into you. Stop behaving like a bully and come out clean on this case.
Is non of your biz if she chooses to date an ugly boy as u put it so please fuc.k off and give them peace.
Most NLs are following and watching the whole drama. Keep fooling yourself instead of minding your business.

As idi..otic and childish Seu-n might be, I tell you SEXKILLZ IS REAPING WHAT HE SOWED. I always told hum he will be disgraced from nairaland by seu-n himself but he doubted me.

The guy was so heartless and mean. He witch hunted me and a few other members just out of mere envy.

Scroll through my threads and you will categorically see about 3 main threads I started to complain about his devilish acts and why he should be removed.

Sexkillz collaborated with one other Mod then (jaybee or so) to ban me cause I was generously dishing out GENUINE recharge card to celebrate my 100 post then. Imagine them hiding my post and loading the card so members will think I was sending out fake cards. The thread is there for you to see if you doubt me.


SEXKILLZ WILL ROT IN HELL AND WILL NEVER KNOW PEACE BOTH ON THE INTERNET AND IN HIS PRIVATE LIFE BECAUSE THE BASTARD IS SUCH A DEVIL, JEALOUS AND CALLOUS BEING.

Wherever you are Sexkills remember I told you you will be humiliated out of nairaland. Even Ogugua will still come out soon to testify to how devilish the gay boy is.