robvp: i am really confused please advise.
I have been in a church relationship with this guy.
How We Met
His father is a very lovely old man, i like him alot, and the father usually beg me to eat in church cos i dont eat except junk foods etc. so during his father's 68 birthday celebration in church, the house ceremony was suppose to be the weekend following the church ceremony (his children arrangement sha), so after talking we ask him to say a wish, the old man was still laughing when his eyes got on me then he laughed again and said jokingly that his wish will be for me to come and cook in their house and eat with them lol. everyone shouted Elenumajeun like they usually call me - which of course means somebody that doesnt eat in yoruba lol.
So na i could not afford to allow an old man wish go unfulfilled so i went to their house to cook coconut rice and serve everyone food on the table, even though i use to see his children in church and ofcourse their lovely mom, nothing really brought us together not even greetings, but that day, seeing me in their house was joy for everyone, we had time to gist and like all of them will say, they never knew i was so funny and playful. so his second son took advantage, collected my number and we began to talk.
From office chat to night calls to outings we began to know more about ourselves, discovering things we never knew about each other and then he ask that we go into a relationship.
You know church relationship what it looks like, no kissing or romance lol and we are quite very busy, he works in the island and i work in mainland, he closes late most of the time and so do i, most time we can book a date and before you know its either an urgent meeting came up in his office or in my office so we just chat. and on saturdays i go for choir practice and he goes to usher meetings and preparation for service starts in the evening so we hardly have time to even see ourselves but we chat and call everyday.
One day, as i browse facebook to ease myself of the stress, i saw a friend request, i checked and the person had over 300 mutual friends i just knew he must be a church member cos i have many church members as friends so i accepted, i checked the face and he looked familiar.
Minutes later he chated me up to say thank you i did not reply, then he followed with, i was blessed by your teachings the other day, so in other for me not to look rude that maybe one of the people in my youth class is thanking me and i ignore, i just answered and he took it from there, chating from one church stuff to the other, i then realise we are in the same choir though we worship in different branches, we usually have bi monthly choir practice that bring every choir from other branch together so he promise to spot me in the general choir practice.
The general choir practice finally came and he tried to spot me but i went hiding, i drove off immediately after and when he did call i told him i was on my way already, he thought i was joking, the second choir practice for the month came and i stylishly escaped again, this time immediately i left, nigga tracked me down and followed me and i never knew, i only notice a car at my back when i was trying to park at home, i wanted to reverse so i saw a car was wondering why the person would not pass to give me space to reverse and park well, to my surprise when i came out of the car, this guy was there smiling on his steering.
We talked outside for sometime then he left, i begin to share the night call, i no longer do very long calls with my boy friend again cos his calls will be on the call waiting through out, disturbing and distracting me and once i drop his calls will come in, and sometime my boy friend will call back and find my number busy and his calls on call waiting, things continues this way, when my boy friend complained i told him, its nothing that its just some friends that's all. he is a very gentle guy so he just stopped complaining and never suspected me of anything.
Before i know what was happening, this new guy fell in love with me and started doing everything to attract me, then we started hanging out, even when meetings will pop up, like my boy friend will say ok let's cancel it, he will rather say ok, lets just meet in a minute no matter how and the good thing is we work in the same vicinity so its easy to meet, he will close from work and will drive down to my office, wait outside and wont even tell me he's around just to give me a surprise dinner dress and take me out, this guy is so romantic and very soon i begin to watch out for his surprises and at this point, calls with my boy friend dropped to like 40% and if he complains i will say i had a hectic day at work, or so much work to take care of which is why i have no time for calls and still he will believe all is well.
After like 12 months of this cat and dog walk, i begin to fall in love with him, so each time we talk he will say, make me the happiest man on earth, accept the proposal to love me please and in one of those days i just said, i love you.
This guy shouted and laughed for a very long time and said yes i got it, he said baby please let me inform my two best school friends that she has said yes now, he called two people and informed them and was so happy.
On Sunday morning he called to say he will be worshiping in my church branch that morning, that he want to see one of his school best friend whom he informed about me saying yes to him that he want the guy to arrange somethings for him. i said ok no problem.
So after church i saw him with my boy friend locking up and gisting seriously, laughing continuously in one corner, i was like are they setting me up or what, i left church immediately and avoided all of them, switched off my phone.
Later in the night i switched on and i got an sms from the two of them that they have been trying to reach me. each of them saying they wanted to introduce me to their best friend. wooooo!!!!
Immediately after he (new boy friend) called me and ask why i never looked for him, that he stayed almost in an open place talking with his best friend so i could see him, that he wanted to introduce me to him, that the guy will be his best man hmm.... he told me his best friend (who is also my boy friend)told him, he is dating a very good lady in church, best lady in the world and that he too will be getting married soon that he is planning to propose very soon.
So he said to me, i want us to do our wedding before him lol, that the guy must best him and then he laughed hard while i pondered around.
While i was still on his calls my boy friend was on awaiting calls, he had called 3 times so i told him somebody is calling i will need to answer immediately, i cut off his calls to respond to my boyfriend and he said baby why did you dissapear from church na, my best school friend visited the church today and i really wanted to show him who my baby is, he talked about his girl friend, how the girl is good, beautiful, brilliant but i think he hasn't seen you, by the time i introduce you to him, he will be speechless, he actually told me i should arrange some settings for him to propose to his girl friend, he said i should invite old school friends and there about which is what im working on.
i almost fainted on the call but honestly i dont know what to do.
I called the new boyfriend to tell him everything but he wont let me, i was looking funny with tears he said ok, please dont cry dont worry i will forgive you anything, i love you to that point, tell me anything you have to tell me, i do know you have a past but i love you beyond so if anything is bordering you, just let it go.
What should i d now?
And note i have not had any intimacy with the two of them, sex, romance or anything close to that, its been purely church relationships. Abegi, go sit down one place. The flow of event is in this story is too connected to be true or na nollywood script where u dey find how to end am. YOU ARE A SMOOTH LIAR. |
