My dad never worked far until when he had no choice than to work off shore this country but he ensures he speaks with everyone one individually and collectively everyday especially when he had 4 girls and 1 boy,he ask of what we ate,what we re wearing,and all sort and when he's around its fun all through,he's such an Amazing Father!

I feel much joy surfing this thread, that i can't wait to have a wife & kids.

Me, i can't cook at all o, but i desire to feel my family by playing chess with my kids, reading with them in the study, doing household chores & the laundry with my wife, devotional prayers, shopping, vacation, deep care for my wife during pregnancy....i could go on...

Those thoughts are do pleasing.

I feel much joy surfing this thread, that i can't wait to have a wife & kids.

Me, i can't cook at all o, but i desire to feel my family by playing chess with my kids, reading with them in the study, doing household chores & the laundry with my wife, devotional prayers, shopping, vacation, deep care for my wife during pregnancy....i could go on...

Those thoughts are so pleasing.

holamiday: I feel much joy surfing this thread, that i can't wait to have a wife & kids.

Me, i can't cook at all o, but i desire to feel my family by playing chess with my kids, reading with them in the study, doing household chores & the laundry with my wife, devotional prayers, shopping, vacation, deep care for my wife during pregnancy....i could go on...

Those thoughts are so pleasing.

And you shall experience contentment when you do those things. Because, really that is what life is about, all your efforts, your struggles, they suddenly have meaning when you do these things with your nearest and dearest. I hope you find someone who shares these dreams with you.

Jamean: Bond ke..Evostic ni
my father doesn't even know jack about bonding, so we are cool with the default bonders 'GREAT MUM'

U are soooooo cute !

Wow ! I'm tripping....................

wow!

Today i have found someone who thinks like me. Thou i am still a bachelor and trust me i cook my meals a lot of times particularly weekends. I think about it almost all the time, asking my wife to chill and stay out of the kitchen while i prepare our meal without any assistance from her no matter how little, and the thought of this idea just gives me instant smile.

This is one of the best ways to bond in a family setting, it doesnt not in any way mean swaaping of roles, its something that if done occasionally, wifey will always appreciating you and youl will infact earn more respect from her, and its another way of igniting the warmth of a happy couple.

Op well done! you are not alone on this.

My dad is a deity, a deputy God for that matter, you don't bond with an oracle and an oracle doesn't bond. Infact, we keep our distances from him. The only time we 'bond' is when he barges in our rooms and check for contrabands.

shaybebaby:
Totally agree with you. The two should not be mutually exclusive as ensuring that your kids grow up in a household with both parents happy with each other sets examples of how they in turn would expect their marriages to be. There are many facets to being a parent as I have discovered myself.
A happy mummy and daddy leads to a happy childhood for the kids and they grow up to be confident. Now kids are very sensitive and pick up bad vibes even when it is not directed at them.
My little man for instance doesn't react when me and hubby have slanging matches but for days after, he's withdrawn and won't interact with us. That's because at those instances, out unhappiness with each other troubles him( he's only two by the way).
We noticed this and this was a wake up call to work on out issues in a better way, I'm happier, daddy is happier and the change in my son is tremendous. You can tell that nothing makes him happier and more secure than when mummy and daddy are making gooey eyes at each other and he gets to butt in. Sometimes, he even arranges us on the sofa to sit together and watch him perform and act cute for us.
In essence, the greatest gift we can give our children( both dads and mums) is time with each other( however little), taking time to look after ourselves as individuals, as part of a couple and also together as a family. There must be a balance and none must be done to the detriment of the other or any other member of the family unit.
Now for all the sicko men on nairaland like that tonychristopher, they are certainly a product of childhoods where their fathers were the examples of what they want to emulate today. To admit that there is more to being a man, husband and father to themselves means they would have to look at their role models critically. Now that would shake them to the core so they close their eyes and continue propagating the ignorance of those that came before them.

popularity ratings...Lol you come here to tell us you cook for your wife and u bond with your family. na new thing.for ur mind u dey romantic .de there husband at large ...or wife need our dodo not bonding


even boyfriends bonds ....

kombats: As an Original brought up African pikin the only time me and my father bond na through cane,beating and punishment. He will say is only the best for U. But still our bonding na him still make sense pass all this western so call bonding

Lol

tonychristopher:


popularity ratings...Lol you come here to tell us you cook for your wife and u bond with your family. na new thing.for ur mind u dey romantic .de there husband at large ...or wife need our dodo not bonding


even boyfriends bonds ....

You see what i was talking about. By their comments you shall know them.

For your info, this person you just quoted is a female. Married woman with a wonderful husband who bonds with her and her son. Please, go and hide your face in shame.

Bonding? Neva hoid of the woid...

The man goes out in the morning, comes back at night. On weekends, he catches up with his sleep. If you misbehave, he would whip out his big brown fluffy towel, faster than Clint Eastwood and minister four or five lashes with that towel. Or he would roll The National Concord newspaper, give you some nice thwacks on the head and shoulder with it. Shikena. Bonding don finish.

The most important thing is that he is alive, hale and hearty and is there for us whenever we need him. I don't know which other bonding you people are talking about.

tonychristopher:


popularity ratings...Lol you come here to tell us you cook for your wife and u bond with your family. na new thing.for ur mind u dey romantic .de there husband at large ...or wife need our dodo not bonding


even boyfriends bonds ....

Nah, I came here to ask you to look a little closer to home for the reason why you are the way you are. Until then can you begin the road to self redemption and hopefully spare the world of progenys that think exactly in warped way their father does.

@NegroG1
bugativeron: I am a father who works in another state. Which is about 4hrs drive from where my family of a wife and 2 young children leave at. I try to be home every 2weeks and I speak with my wife like 5 or 6 times in a day this include early in d morning and late at night. But of recent I have noticed a trend in which I specially will make a lovely special dish for the family on sundays or saturday evening. This helps us to bond as a family. While wify and children watch tv I cook for them and serve them. Today it was a special jollof rice with chicken using one of my grand ma recipe. I realised this allow us to spend time together. Guys share your family bonding strategy.

How old are you? 8?

I dont understand the essence of this quesion but if it is important to you I am 41yrs however I dont look a bit my age. I could go for a 34yr old guy base on how people tend to tell me. So what are you driving at with your question?

Essentially,all clear expressions and manifestations of love,affection and attention do the bonding magic. Yes,lots of attention matter.

Meanwhile,please do something about the bi-weekly visit o.You are doing well,but we all know that lots of attention is what a family-wife and kids-will need most o.

Anyway,well done for your efforts!

Sophyrocks:

You see what i was talking about. By their comments you shall know them.

For your info, this person you just quoted is a female. Married woman with a wonderful husband who bonds with her and her son. Please, go and hide your face in shame.

This one ke? Even if you split open that thick skull and physically insert common sense, he would still yarn twatwa!

@ Sparklingheart
bugativeron: I am a father who works in another state. Which is about 4hrs drive from where my family of a wife and 2 young children leave at. I try to be home every 2weeks and I speak with my wife like 5 or 6 times in a day this include early in d morning and late at night. But of recent I have noticed a trend in which I specially will make a lovely special dish for the family on sundays or saturday evening. This helps us to bond as a family. While wify and children watch tv I cook for them and serve them. Today it was a special jollof rice with chicken using one of my grand ma recipe. I realised this allow us to spend time together. Guys share your family bonding strategy.


This sound so lovely...bt then... I dnt really like it wen couples live seperately... Cnt they b moved 2 ur location... I think d bond will b more superb


I dont like it either but I battled it for a long time but couldnt win. It is usually difficult to be permanently at a place as a salesman. You keep moving around and you cant keep moving your family with you until you stop working. many weekends my children cried and begged me not to go. but I guess they are used to it now. The only problem is if I dare not to show up on my usual Friday then there will be trouble.

Well other things i tried to do to ensure bonding is to wake up saturday morning and study a bible story with the children and ensure we all pray together as a family. Last saturday, my daughter was asking me, she is 8yrs old, why she cant lead prayer, why should it always be me or my wife and I laughed out loud. I had to take her through it and explain why. Funny enough she and her 5yr old brother said to me that they prefer my prayer to their mum. That her prayer is usually longgggggg while mine is short and straight to the point. but the gist is that I try to spend time sharing bible stories with them and I demonstrate in a caricature form the learnings. Like the caricature story of the great flood, how the animals where coming from different areas of the earth and how the other guys were begging Noah to open the Ark door for them when it started to rain.

shaybebaby:
This one ke? Even if you split open that thick skull and physically insert common sense, he would still yarn twatwa!

There was never any bonding with my dad except shouting or holding official meetings where you will be scolded or ridiculed. My dad has no time for leisure and no patience for kids. He sees what you call bonding as being a weakling. We never watched TV as kids courtesy of him. And he lived and worked away from us. We never liked him coming home but anytime he does,we will be praying for him to leave soon. There was a time we visited him and he treated us so bad that we threatened mum to take us home or we travel on foot. Now he do call me sometimes to know how am doing,even calling me pet names and it feels so good. How i wish he did all that when i was a little girl.

shaybebaby:
Nah, I came here to ask you to look a little closer to home for the reason why you are the way you are. Until then can you begin the road to self redemption and hopefully spare the world of progenys that think exactly in warped way their father does.

moralist.keep talking. I be Igbo we are not polygamist and I don't hav kids outside
l
we know tribes that have kids outside and polygamy ...even my great grand dad wasn't a polygamist so bounce


redeem USFL

this bonding thing self...una get time....everyman has his way of bonding it must not be effeminate

tonychristopher:

moralist.keep talking. I be Igbo we are not polygamist and I don't hav kids outside
l
we know tribes that have kids outside and polygamy ...even my great grand dad wasn't a polygamist so bounce


redeem USFL

You must be quite dumb for you to equate my post with polygamy. It isn't!
To simplify it for your tiny mind, I'll put it this way.
The reason why your mind is tiny and reasons like it does is because your model was your pa! What you know is what he showed you and because of your inherent ignorance and possibly being a big wet blouse, you dare not closely examine your relationship with him, where it was lacking and how you might better improve the one you have with your kids.
Instead, you cling to what you know( ya poor thing) and as result will raise kids who think just like you do and the cycle continues. More men who don't know what it takes to be a father. Sad really!

@ op God bless ur home,u're not only bonding with ur family u're raising ur son in a way he'll never depart frm it,pls keep it up

elspycey: My dad is a deity, a deputy God for that matter, you don't bond with an oracle and an oracle doesn't bond. Infact, we keep our distances from him. The only time we 'bond' is when he barges in our rooms and check for contrabands.

@ contrabands!!
Odaran!!

I speak with my wife almost every 3 hours per day why speak my little queen will keep quite while looking at the phone she is just 3 months.
I plan to be the best father ever to my children. As far my dad he did not have time for bonding though i love him with my life till day.