1miccza:


Honestly,i have asked myself this same question. I am very sure that Sophie had better guys coming for her before opting for the animal that eventually ended her young life. I just don't understand how they reason sometimes.

Am short of words, very pathetic...

May God guide and protect all the strong women on this thread who were able to survive turbulent marriages. Stories like this make me have less concern about marriage. That's y I am trying to be self reliant so as not to depend on any man, cuz this is what they use to trap the women.

ephee:


Read tru ur story and discovered I was also in the same boat as u but in my own case.my hubby made me stay away from my mum and family members which made me isolated and he reported evey misunderstanding to his mum and siblings who supported him. After d last incidence of his strangling me and got rescued by my neigbours Ifinally informed my mum tru d help of my boss.I packed all my stuffs and my baby's stuffs into a hired cab and left finally. My husband neva bothered to look for us coz he belived I wil run bak after a while not until it dawned on him that av left for real. Not even his family called.I am a happy single mum now and I belive God wil send me a helper to take care of my finances.my mum has relly been trying for me and baby.

U r really a strong lady. I believe if u have some education or acquired skills u can sail through and be financially independent. U don't really need a man as a helper in that regards. If love comes knocking again pls open ur heart but not necessarily because he's a helper. I do hope u will understand my post. Stay blessed

ireneidiva:
Blessed not 'blest'.

Thanks. Blest is both past tense and past participle

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/blest

beeevan:


It's quite unfortunate and if you speak to any of them in real life, you will understand where the compound"fish brain" came from.

Lol of compound fish brain

bukatyne:

Thanks. Blest is both past tense and past particle

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/blest

Particle? Okay.

ireneidiva:
Particle? Okay.

Participle

Ma kosi mi lopolo jo

*Modifying my initial post

soonest:
U r really a strong lady. I believe if u have some education or acquired skills u can sail through and be financially independent. U don't really need a man as a helper in that regards. If love comes knocking again pls open ur heart but not necessarily because he's a helper. I do hope u will understand my post. Stay blessed

Tanks soonest am a graduate of english arts from olabisi onabanjo university nd av working experiences but since I had my baby due to the attention and fragile nature I couldn't work far away.I had no one to stay wit the baby even if I started work so I ended up in a private secondary school as a teacher taking english and literature subjects.it was quite stressful and discourageing coz they don't pay salaries and wen u end up collecting ur salary its either u av loads of debts or u get half of nothing and I had to pay for her creche fee to despite being a staff.I love singing and am a very good hair stylist and nail beautician. Coz of my baby I av to get a job that wil involve closing early and not far from home.that's y getin a job for now is a bit selective

ephee:


Read tru ur story and discovered I was also in the same boat as u but in my own case.my hubby made me stay away from my mum and family members which made me isolated and he reported evey misunderstanding to his mum and siblings who supported him. After d last incidence of his strangling me and got rescued by my neigbours Ifinally informed my mum tru d help of my boss.I packed all my stuffs and my baby's stuffs into a hired cab and left finally. My husband neva bothered to look for us coz he belived I wil run bak after a while not until it dawned on him that av left for real. Not even his family called.I am a happy single mum now and I belive God wil send me a helper to take care of my finances.my mum has relly been trying for me and baby.

I love to hear/read about women being very strong, my own issolatted me from other family and friends but he never succeeded in seperating me from my mom, anyway the best is that we became stronger and moved on.. May God be wit us single mothers

beeevan:



Am short of words, very pathetic...

So damn pathetic...

kkjoy:


I love to hear/read about women being very strong, my own issolatted me from other family and friends but he never succeeded in seperating me from my mom, anyway the best is that we became stronger and moved on.. May God be wit us single mothers

Amen o.tanks

personally, I believe abusive husbands always show some signs before the marriage but usually you ladies attribute such signs as manly. y'all like badass guys sheyy

When you see a man hitting himself on the street, the usual thought will be 'this man is mad' because only a mad man will hit himself.

Now, marriage means two people joined together as one. Hence only a mad man will beat his wife because they are one flesh. I hope many of the 'wife beaters' will understand this concept and change.

Unfortunately a lot of women get married for the wrong reason, mostly just so that they answer "mrs" and remove the shame of "singlehood".


And also we have the girls who think marriage is an easy way to a meal ticket instead of trying to develop themselves

Then when the abuse starts its difficult for them to react appropriately because this was suppose to be their dream come true.

[quote author=onismate]Life
seems to be strange, not because it is but because human beings tends to
do strange things in life through their attitude.
Mr. sule, had married sophie for over 5years. Sophie a 28year old
lady married to about 47years old sule, to some people is quite a large
age difference and very very odd, but for mr sule, he calls it “LOVE”.
Sometimes I quite imagine the pain this woman sophie goes through
in the hands of sule, for a woman who is 8 months pregnant. They both
and their 3 kids living in an ancient one story building, the parlor is
upstairs and the rooms are downstairs.
Mr. sule had ordered his wife sophie that any time she wants to
serve him food she dares not bring everything at once together. For
instance if she wants to serve him pounded yam and egusi soup, she will
take pounded yam in the plate upstairs alone, comeback to take the soup,
next is the water to wash his hands then comes back to take the
drinking water before coming to take the towel to clean his hands and
mouth. And after eating she will come back to clean up the table and
pack the plates, she will still follow the same procedure of carrying
the plates downstairs one after the other. The day she doesn’t do it
that way or misses it she will receive massive beating, Or maybe he
called her and she wasted few more minutes before answering him, because
he had warned her that let her not allow him call her twice, unless
maybe she’s not at home ,but if she is at home once he calls her, even
though she is doing any major work, she must leave the work to come
answer him because, if she doesn’t, she will be beaten. It has happened
many times, and after beaten her, mr sule doesn’t even regret it.
Imagine this stress for a woman in her 8th month of pregnancy, climbing
stairs with all the pains. All these made sophie scared and terrified
the own house. Anytime she hears her husband’s thunderous voice, her
heart will start beating fast, the whole of herself will be full of
fear, her thoughts will be like “ hope I have not done anything wrong,
hope he will not beat me again”. As the day breaks, the situation
becomes worse. Each day she prays that God should bring an end to the
union. She hopes that God will answer her prayers. She wants rest of
mind, she wants peace of the mind. No NGO to report to, nowhere to run
to even if he leaves that house. She is an orphan, sule married from the
an orphanage home. The orphanage home were trying to give away all the
children, teenagers and adults in their custody. Even if she runs out of
the house, where will she run to, which NGO will fight for her?
This faithful evening sophie had just prepared jullof rice with a
good fish, she was rushing to serve sule the food. She believes he will
be very hungry by then. As she rushed to meet his demands, She missed
it! As she served him the food she came along with a drinking water
along with the plate of jullof rice. Sule was like “what ! you still
repeated it again today” sule shouted. By that time sophie had known
that sule will beat her. She had been warned by her husband sule, when
serving her food, she shouldn’t bring everything, both the food and
drinking water together. She must bring the food first, then go back and
bring drinking water. Standing and gazing into sule’ furious eyes,
anger was written all over him. Seeing this, fear engulfed sophie. She
knows that sule will surely come to beat her. She immediately dropped
the food and started running downstairs, sule ran after her.
Unfortunately, as she was running downstairs she fell at the last lap
with head on the floor as she tumbled, even as she fell to the floor
sule never gave up, he caught up with her, he lifted up his hand to hit
her, luckily a visitor was just approaching towards the stairs to the
parlor, he grabbed his hand, suspending it on air, “do you want to kill
her?” he shouted. He grabbed him and pushed him away. Sule was still
fuming in anger, the visitor doesn’t want him to beat sophie. The
visitor reached out to sophie, he tries to lift her up, but she was not
moving, she was still on the floor motionless. He moved her one more
time if he could wake her up but still no response, immediately he
shouted for help, sule was there standing, he hissed and left the place.
The visitor rushed outside and called other neighbors to come help out.
They took her to the hospital but unfortunately she was gone, she was
dead. The matter didn’t end there. Sule was arrested and locked up and
awaiting trial. This was when I was in primary school. Now am grown, I
have finished my Degree, sule is still in prison awaiting trial.
This story touched my heart because she never deserved
all beating. She died a painful death in pregnancy. She was chased to
her grave by a so called sweet heart {husband}.

Please Lets come together to fight violence and physical abuse of women
in Homes

[quote author=esthybam][/quote]

While the bottom of your post is sensational, who are the people to fight against abuse in homes?

Did the women complain to you? Even if they did, are they ready to face it head on?

Everybody is wired to remove themselves from harmful situations. What is harmful varies from person to person.

We really do not know what we want in our society. We just mouth stuffs without building a foundation for it.

A child that saw her mom beaten by her dad and they claim to be 'happily' married or have a successful home or lead the marriage committee, how can she dump an abusive boyfriend/fiancee? How can she see anything wrong in battery?

We teach our kids that men & women are not equal and yet we complain men treat women like kids, playthings or properties?

We never hold men accountable and we complain they do not lead by example? We don't let our sons do chores and we complain that our husbands do not help?

We stayin shitty marriages without cautioning the men and we complain our kids esp. sons make lousy spouses?

Husband = Lord & Chief commander and we complain they treat women as subordinates?

We have sown the wind and are reaping the whirlwind. Women ain't seen nothing yet. We all should carry go and not train/caution the men around us.

Goodluck in your women lib program

Truer words?
Never been spoken.
It is women's fault
And the fault is ours to correct.

bukatyne:

While the bottom of your post is sensational, who are the people to fight against abuse in homes?

Did the women complain to you? Even if they did, are they ready to face it head on?

Everybody is wired to remove themselves from harmful situations. What is harmful varies from person to person.

We really do not know what we want in our society. We just mouth stuffs without building a foundation for it.

A child that saw her mom beaten by her dad and they claim to be 'happily' married or have a successful home or lead the marriage committee, how can she dump an abusive boyfriend/fiancee? How can she see anything wrong in battery?

We teach our kids that men & women are not equal and yet we complain men treat women like kids, playthings or properties?

We never hold men accountable and we complain they do not lead by example? We don't let our sons do chores and we complain that our husbands do not help?

We stayin shitty marriages without cautioning the men and we complain our kids esp. sons make lousy spouses?

Husband = Lord & Chief commander and we complain they treat women as subordinates?

We have sown the wind and are reaping the whirlwind. Women ain't seen nothing yet. We all should carry go and not train/caution the men around us.

Goodluck in your women lib program