I have been seeing lots of ladies lately all clamouring to become single mothers...

Abeg help me ask them why... I have been trying to ask they why that insane thought... But they all have been giving flimsy excuses...

If u are a lady out there also having same thought... Can u please explain ur reasons so we can understand u better?

am married...Sekems into thread. i believe they hav dia reasons...some because lack of husbands and their biological clock is not only Ticking but Runnin faster than usain bolt.so its beta to pick the Apple from the ground,than watch it rot away.

Right of CHOICE or freedom to decide HOW I want to be a mother

You don't know ladies.
Many of them are just making mouth.
Nobody, not even an oyibo woman wants to be a single mother.
It usually happens by mistake then they defend it so they dont feel bad about themselves.


I remember one monicker that opened a thread on Nairaland a few months ago.
She was arguing vehemently how she would prefer to be a single mother and raise her kids by herself.
Others came and formed 'supporters club' for her.
Imagine their shock when she unconsciously announced in response to another thread that 'her hubby can't treat her that way'!
People started asking 'ah, so you are married?''why that other thread na'?
Her response was she was just catching her fun.
Meanwhile some people don carry her matta for head.


So leave them.
I repeat: No sane or emotionally balanced woman deliberately wants to raise a child on her own. Its just circumstances that make it so.

5minsmadness: You don't know ladies.
Many of them are just making mouth.
Nobody, not even an oyibo woman wants to be a single mother.
It usually happens by mistake then they defend it so they dont feel bad about themselves.


I remember one monicker that opened a thread on Nairaland a few months ago.
She was arguing vehemently how she would prefer to be a single mother and raise her kids by herself.
Others came and formed 'supporters club' for her.
Imagine their shock when she unconsciously announced in response to another thread that 'her hubby can't treat her that way'!
People started asking 'ah, so you are married?''why that other thread na'?
Her response was she was just catching her fun.
Meanwhile some people don carry her matta for head.


So leave them.
I repeat: No sane or emotionally balanced woman deliberately wants to raise a child on her own. Its just circumstances that make it so.

End of discussion

The thing is that some women are simply unmarriageable, either because of self-esteem issues related to their looks, their character or their sexual histories.

For example, imagine a lady in her mid thirties, whom from undergrad years has been accustomed to being chased and wooed, being wined and dined, being spoiled with cash and grifts, being the play toy for sugar daddies.

Within her, she already knows that she most likely would fail at being a wife and companion to one man for the rest of her life.

If this is the trend happening in Nigeria, I pity the f00ls...

They are copying western lifestyle blindly. Even with all the western social and institutional supports single mothers still struggle like mad. Talkless, of a Nigerian society and system that lacks such support.

Has it come to this, that some foolish Nigerian will copy without common sense. From sagging of trousers , to nonsense fashion, fake accents, wigs etc.. Some of us keep copying without practical reason.

How will a sane person knowingly put themselves in such predicament.. WHY..!!!!

Where do people meet such ladies? I have never known any lady who planned or desired to be a single mother.

I had a class mate that said she will never marry , she was only 15 then. She is still single till date, lets see if she changes her mind because she is still young for now.

beeevan: I had a class mate that said she will never marry , she was only 15 then. She is still single till date, lets see if she changes her mind because she is still young for now.

Choosing not to marry is not the same as wanting to be a single mother, is it?

Girls want to be single mothers becos there is a very high degree of scarcity of GOOD husbands.

ledafaze:
. But they all have been giving flimsy excuses.

like?

balamz:

Why you dey close mouth? Abi your teeth dey smell?

chimoz:
Why you dey close mouth? Abi your teeth dey smell?

balamz:

And he repeats it. Loosen my temper and gives him the beating of his life.

chimoz:
And he repeats it. Loosen my temper and gives him the beating of his life.

5minsmadness: You don't know ladies.
Many of them are just making mouth.
Nobody, not even an oyibo woman wants to be a single mother.
It usually happens by mistake then they defend it so they dont feel bad about themselves.


I remember one monicker that opened a thread on Nairaland a few months ago.
She was arguing vehemently how she would prefer to be a single mother and raise her kids by herself.
Others came and formed 'supporters club' for her.
Imagine their shock when she unconsciously announced in response to another thread that 'her hubby can't treat her that way'!
People started asking 'ah, so you are married?''why that other thread na'?
Her response was she was just catching her fun.
Meanwhile some people don carry her matta for head.
j

So leave them.
I repeat: No sane or emotionally balanced woman deliberately wants to raise a child on her own. Its just circumstances that make it so.

This is a bit of generalization

Some people (men & women) are not kin on marriage but want to have their own biological kids.

It may not be a norm but there are some people serious about it and will delibrately seek it.

possibly the single girls notice amongst their married friends that married men no longer take care of their children's financial needs. The married mothers are the ones paying for school fees,school uniforms, taking care of feeding and clothing their children, without their husband's assistance... invariably their married friends are living like single mums in real life, and their staying married is simply a status, nothing more..
so why delude themselves? they dont like to be a single mum, nobody does but why live a life of pretense, that all is well, when its Not?

carefreewannabe:

Choosing not to marry is not the same as wanting to be a single mother, is it?

She made it clear that she will have 4 kids from 4 different men.

Amelian: possibly the single girls notice amongst their married friends that the men their friends married no longer take care of their children's financial needs. Her married friends are the ones paying for school fees,school uniforms, taking care of feeding and clothing their children, without their husband's assistance... invariably their married friends are living like single mums in real life, and their staying married is simply a status, nothing more..
so why delude themselves? they dont like to be a single mum, nobody does but why live a life of pretense, that all is well, when its Not?

Corrected.
Because ALL married men I know WITHOUT EXCEPTION are the ones paying for their children's school fees, feeding and clothing.

well, the ones av met, either complains that their husbands rarely pays for the kids school fees and dont even bother , if theres food in the house or not. while another section of married women have met, will say the financial aspect of running their homes and paying of school fees is divided 50 -50... so the wives said.

..

Amelian: well, the ones av met, either complains that their husbands rarely pays for the kids school fees and dont even bother , if theres food in the house or not. while another section of married women have met, will say the financial aspect of running their homes and paying of school fees is divided 50 -50... so the wives said.

Well as for the latter there's nothing wrong with dividing the work 50-50. Feminism things...
But as for the former example its either the men are jobless or the marriage has problems. Though I still think it will be all those kpangolo marriages sha cos I don't see how a man will open his two korokoro eyes and watch his kids starve even if he is angry with the wife.

lol @ kpangolo marriage

hmmm, ok o

beeevan:


She made it clear that she will have 4 kids from 4 different men.

Good luck.

carefreewannabe: Where do people meet such ladies? I have never known any lady who planned or desired to be a single mother.

They are everywhere... Maybe it is out of frustration or sorts of... only God knows... a lady was once telling me that she wants to get married o but would prefer being a single mother... just to have a child and care for the child on her own without any wahala... I was jaw-dropped.

Amelian: well, the ones av met, either complains that their husbands rarely pays for the kids school fees and dont even bother , if theres food in the house or not. while another section of married women have met, will say the financial aspect of running their homes and paying of school fees is divided 50 -50... so the wives said.

At least, those ones were married and later got into that status of being a single mother... but wont be saying such if they got married to their dream man...

cococandy: like?

Like what we have been saying here.... they dont want to be under any man.... FEMINISM in short... Kai!

Ehen so how is it your business?

ledafaze:

They are everywhere... Maybe it is out of frustration or sorts of... only God knows... a lady was once telling me that she wants to get married o but would prefer being a single mother... just to have a child and care for the child on her own without any wahala... I was jaw-dropped.



At least, those ones were married and later got into that status of being a single mother... but wont be saying such if they got married to their dream man...




Like what we have been saying here.... they dont want to be under any man.... FEMINISM in short... Kai!

cococandy: Ehen so how is it your business?

ledafaze:

They are everywhere... Maybe it is out of frustration or sorts of... only God knows... a lady was once telling me that she wants to get married o but would prefer being a single mother... just to have a child and care for the child on her own without any wahala... I was jaw-dropped.

I have never met such ladies.

carefreewannabe: Where do people meet such ladies? I have never known any lady who planned or desired to be a single mother.

Well I av and dese girls are not yet in deir 30s but dey r already thinking of bin single mothers deir excuse is dat dey don't want any man to control dem or b a slave to one dude...so dear dere r ladies who av dese thoughts

blessedqueen:
Well I av and dese girls are not yet in deir 30s but dey r already thinking of bin single mothers deir excuse is dat dey don't want any man to control dem or b a slave to one dude...so dear dere r ladies who av dese thoughts

I hope they will tell the potential fathers about it before they get pregnant for them.