You can use these everyday phrases to instill confidence, self-respect, and thoughtfulness in your children.

Thank you
It's important to acknowledge your child's efforts to help you or others. You might say: "Thanks for helping me look for that missing sock" or "Thanks for setting the table; I got the salad made while you were doing that."

Tell me more.
Words like these show your child that you are listening and that you would like to hear more about what's on her mind. "Tell me more" encourages conversation without passing judgment or giving immediate advice – two responses that discourage further communication from your child.

You can do it.
Your expression of confidence in your child's ability to do many things without your help is important. As your child grows older, there will be many times when your encouragement will mean the difference between his giving up on a challenging task or seeing it through.

How can I help?
Let your child know you are willing and available to help her accomplish a particular task that may be difficult for her to manage on her own. You might say: "I think you can read that story by yourself now. Let me know if you need help with a new word." As your child takes on projects in school, encourage her to think of specific steps that are necessary to complete a project. You both can decide which tasks your child can handle on her own and which ones she'll need help with.

Let's do it together.
A child is never too young to learn that cooperation and team effort make many jobs easier and speedier – and often more fun: "Let's all pitch in and finish raking the leaves so we can go in and bake cookies," or "Let's all pitch in and clean up the kitchen or we'll miss the movie." Family activities and group chores can develop into pleasant rituals that enrich a child's life and create fond memories.

How about a hug?
Don't just tell your child you love him – show him. Research indicates that young children deprived of physical touch and displays of affection often fail to thrive. As children grow older, they vary in the ways they like us to show affection. Some love to be cuddled, while others prefer a quick hug or pat on the shoulder. It's important to be aware of what your child enjoys most at a particular age.
Please. After all these years, "please" is still a classic. When you ask a favor of anyone – including children – this "magic word" acknowledges that you are asking for a behavior that will help you and/or make you happy. (P.S.: Don't forget to say "thank you" when the job is done.)

Good job!
Good for you. Self-respect and self-confidence grow when your child's efforts and performance are rewarded. Whenever possible, give your child lots of praise. Be sure your praise is honest and specific. Focus on your child's efforts and progress, and help her identify her strengths.

It's time to... "It's time to get ready for bed," or "do homework," or "turn off the TV." Young children need structure in their daily lives to provide a measure of security in an often insecure world. It is up to you as a parent to establish and maintain a workable schedule of activities, always remembering that children benefit from regular mealtimes and bedtimes.

I love you.
Everyone needs love and affection and a feeling of acceptance and belonging. We can't assume that children know and understand our love for them unless we tell them. Letting your child know that you love him (and showing him with countless hugs) is important not only in toddlerhood, but also as he gets older.

Use your inner voice.

Make sense

Kanwulia:
Use your inner voice.

Dnt use ur inner voice ooo... kids dnt read minds..... d same tin our parents did nd dy failed in dier "parenting" job

bossminded:


Dnt use ur inner voice ooo... kids dnt read minds..... d same tin our parents did nd dy failed in dier "parenting" job

You misunderstood me.
I meant "don't yell"!

Kanwulia:


You misunderstood me.
I meant "don't yell"!

Ok cool, my bad

I b dn para already

u had better not tell my little girl "tell me more" she will talk ur ears off literally!. Instead I just say
Okay..,
Really?
Aww, too bad or that's good.
That way she knows I'm listening but she doesn't have to talk so much.

sheunfemix:
u had better not tell my little girl "tell me more" she will talk ur ears off literally!. Instead I just say
Okay..,
Really?
Aww, too bad or that's good.
That way she knows I'm listening but she doesn't have to talk so much.

You too? ooooh my daughter loves the sound of her own voice I tell you. She is a blowbyblow storyteller. Kai! I thank daily I only have 1 of her. All the same, I guess life will be kinda dull if we only had her 3 brothers. She is the 'spice' in the mix

Good thread for sincere parents who would help the self esteem of their kids. Similar thread here too:

http://nigerianparentsforum.com/index.php/kunena/boosting-your-child-s-self-esteem

Children are so adorable and innocent(novice) when younger (2-6yrs), the eairlier you start molding their mind, the better the future holds for them in the society.." Train your child in the way of the lord so when he grows he'll will not depart from it".

this one is a good piece.will share this wit madam

Lovely tips

smartmom:


You too? ooooh my daughter loves the sound of her own voice I tell you. She is a blowbyblow storyteller. Kai! I thank daily I only have 1 of her. All the same, I guess life will be kinda dull if we only had her 3 brothers. She is the 'spice' in the mix

Its good when you have a talking child cos its easier to communicate which builds more confidence in a child

Papisho:


Its good when you have a talking child cos its easier to communicate which builds more confidence in a child

I agree. She can never keep any secret that may harm her from us. Abuse of any kind will not find her a target because she will spill the beans for that I am grateful

I have 3

Had I been told all this as a child I would probably have followed my passion to become a mechanic. Instead I'm a Doctor because of words like:
You must be crazy?
S'owa daada?
I will reset your brain with my belt!
Ewure!
And the best of them all is;
Your head is just a big bowl of senseless Akamu!

What a cruel World!

Lols. Time still dey na. U fit go back *kidding* Anyway, nice write up. I'm an expectant father so this is very useful

KingTom:
Had I been told all this as a child I would probably have followed my passion to become a mechanic. Instead I'm a Doctor because of words like:
You must be crazy?
S'owa daada?
I will reset your brain with my belt!
Ewure!
And the best of them all is;
Your head is just a big bowl of senseless Akamu!

What a cruel World!

andre82:
Lols. Time still dey na. U fit go back *kidding* Anyway, nice write up. I'm an expectant father so this is very useful

Time no dey again na. Anyway congratulations

Lols...thanks too...

KingTom:

Time no dey again na. Anyway congratulations

KingTom:
Had I been told all this as a child I would probably have followed my passion to become a mechanic. Instead I'm a Doctor because of words like:
You must be crazy?
S'owa daada?
I will reset your brain with my belt!
Ewure!
And the best of them all is;
Your head is just a big bowl of senseless Akamu!

What a cruel World!

I'm glad u know the impact the above words had on you, I'm sure u'll make amends training your own child..

Thinking aloud/lighter mood: I guess you must have been so sturborn as a child. I'm sure u had strokes of cane in addition to those words..lol

[b][/b]Your head is just a big bowl of senseless Akamu!

smartmom:


I agree. She can never keep any secret that may harm her from us. Abuse of any kind will not find her a target because she will spill the beans for that I am grateful

You should be grateful indeed cos Its a wicked world out there and you can't always be with your child,i.e nanny, crech, school, even with friends.. On seeing them, e.g. after school,you can ask questions like:
1. How are you
2. Have you eaten
3. How was your day,
4. What happened in school today e.t.c

For the talking child, u'll sure get answers than expected

Communication is so key to raising a child as this will build your relationship and confidence in the Child. I wish all parent will see this.

Papisho:


You should be grateful indeed cos Its a wicked world out there and you can't always be with your child,i.e nanny, crech, school, even with friends.. On seeing them, e.g. after school,you can ask questions like:
1. How are you
2. Have you eaten
3. How was your day,
4. What happened in school today e.t.c

For the talking child, u'll sure get answers than expected

Communication is so key to raising a child as this will build your relationship and confidence in the Child. I wish all parent will see this
.

You are soooo right. Many parents are way too busy and distracted or pre occupied earning to cater for these very kids that are being abused and destroyed by employees. Before it comes to the knowledge of the parents, its often too late to be fixed.
Here is a link to where parents of like mimds are discussing, sharing and learning on how to prevent this dangerous trend:http://nigerianparentsforum.com/index.php/kunena/boosting-your-child-s-self-esteem

[quote author=smartmom post=28074010]

You are soooo right. Many parents are way too busy and distracted or pre occupied earning to cater for these very kids that are being abused and destroyed by employees. Before it comes to the knowledge of the parents, its often too late to be fixed.
Here is a link to where parents of like mimds are discussing, sharing and learning on how to prevent this dangerous trend:http://nigerianparentsforum.com/index.php/kunena/boosting-your-child-s-self-esteem[/quote

Its a nice and informative forum

smartmom:


You are soooo right. Many parents are way too busy and distracted or pre occupied earning to cater for these very kids that are being abused and destroyed by employees. Before it comes to the knowledge of the parents, its often too late to be fixed.
Here is a link to where parents of like mimds are discussing, sharing and learning on how to prevent this dangerous trend:http://nigerianparentsforum.com/index.php/kunena/boosting-your-child-s-self-esteem

It is a nice and informative forum

#11

God is on your side and through Him, you can do all things