Please post ds 4me, Our marriage will be just 3yrs and we've got 2boys but I just dislike my hubby cos he does all I don't like or want in a man, he's very stingy, doesn't appreciate, nags so much also and doesn't stay @home 2play with us even weekend, he prefers staying outside and talks too much. I always blame God for not allowing me end up with my Ex whom I dated for just 5yrs while in school, honestly he's such a wonderful man, he's caring nd vry loving we broke up prolly because of our religion differences. The problem I have now is I cant stop loving him despite the fact that I know that we can never have anything to do with each other again because he's also married with a daughter nw. Please advice me on what to do because my hubby keeps doing things that doesn't want or make me keep loving him
And have discuss with him several times without a change

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Nigerian-Papalette/312263085651212?ref=hl

Ur thinking about your Ex

for better for worse...
the harm has been done so fix it

No 1. Stop comparing your husband with your ex, that is one path to dissatisfaction.
No 2. Ve you been a wonderful wife to him too? You talked about finding it hard to love him because of his behaviour
...trying loving him more, pray, and be patient with him. ve you not heard of acts of love melting a man's heart?

Never you allow d memory of ur ex spoil ur marriage dear

This woman should let bygone be bygone.

iceberylin:
Ur thinking about your Ex

I guess so.. It's ALL MESSED UP MENH!!

OP to be frank, in Nigeria, the man is a saint and if ever the husband miss behaves, we just blame the woman for it. We say you shouldnt wish for any thing better, dress well. Cook more, smile harder, and just work round the clock to please him. Do not break down, do not even take a break from pleaseing the man who doesnt care about you, the moment you show weakness, you are at fault. Once you marry as a woman in Nigeria, you have lost your human feeling, you have become someones, thing! Your duty is to endure reproduce and endure some more. If the society pity you a little, they will encourage you to pray, fast, endure, and dont complain(nag) you deserve nothing more in life than to endure as a woman, focus on your kids and business, like his mother did.
Fast some more and just look on and hope that one day, even if it happens 100 years later, he will recognise you as his wife and return to you when your youth and sexual needs have been starved to death. or he will return when he is broke and cant keep going out and you have to be a good wife and surffer and nurse him back to health.

#dated my ex for just 5yrs..


Hmmmmn.....

Pele o . mgbeketoto come and advice
Sophyrocks
aisha
Efemena




you are all needed here

Hello All, the wife later sent this to us...

'Thanks all for the advices(though it was Harsh on me) but it makes me wake up from every lust that I have towards my EX, since we broke up after 6years have never set my eyes on him cos he has traveld oversea but we were friends on FB and also BBM which have deleted on Sunday, the truth is he happened to be my first man(deflowered me)and he's wealthy and values me so much and his younger sister was also my roommate back in school and we are still friends so she often comes to my house to gist and told what I would have achieved if I had ended up with her brother. But on my hubby part, his attitude isn't pleasant @all and he is jst the opposite of my ex, he doesn't appreciate me, am very mannered nd I courted my hubby for 2yrs but didn't actually see all this or let's me say I saw little and I was hoping for a change. Am not a wayward lady likewise my hubby is never a cheat. Thanks all am grateful because I can never tell anyone around me about this that why am here 2seek advice because that was the exact way I felt, and I think I will also cut off the friendship btw I and the sister to avoid bullshits again...
Sorry didn't wanted to write a long story that why I didn't explain better on the first post!'

There are some wrong decisions we take and have to live with all our life.

The biggest mistake you made was sacrificing your love because of religious differences.
Love is strong enough to deal with religious differences.

Now just make the best of the situation.
Show your husband love and he will hopefully show love in return. He might notice that you have kept a part of yourself aware from him.
Please forget how rich your ex was and do not compare the two.

For the world outside your husband is as great as you take him to be.

Modified.

I don't know why I bother.