82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

You are living with a cheating wife
You need to have your head checked.

this is one experience no man wants to have, but I trust you have a strong character.

The solution to me lies in talking and I know she has her concerns too, though not enough to justify her acts, you two should talk it out. Hope she changes for good.

Is she high on something? You forgave her and she is still doing it. Please tell her that you know what is still going on and let her choose her marriage or her new lover. Its decision time, She cant eat her cake and have it. However do not retaliate but put your foot down. I wish all the best OP. Some women sha.

holluwai:
Is she from Benin?

I bet you can be more constructive.

Never sleep with her again unprotected. That's my only advice. Better safe than sorry.

Like seriously?? Is that supposed to be a question or an indecision

Seriously? she is still in contact with the guy and you are still having hopes of talking her out of it? Sorry to say but staying married to a woman whose heart is somewhere else will surely cost you your life. if you don't get wise now, you will in the grave; and when you die, your 5 year old son will have to live without his father and with a loose mother and, at best, a stepfather. My advise, stop being foolish and do the needful. The odds are better with you alive.

firstEVA:
[s]I feel for you, but pls forgive her since you have the heart to, you have put your child as your major consideration and I believe you're doing the right thing, have a heart to heart talk with her on why you're still staying back in the marriage, she will change for good. A united home is always better for children[/s].

Rubbish!! No therapy whatsoever has proven to cure a dog that eat shiiits

You're considering the feelings of your son (which is quite commendable) but you aren't considering the harm you're doing to yourself. Things are gradually falling apart, emotional trauma, its also affecting you psychologically and professionally. If its not put in check it might go so bad that you loose it. If all you need to have your life back is seperation, then I advice that. Your son will grow to understand provided you give him the best life you can afford

[Your word is 10000% right i wonder if people do read and ungderstand that what this guy is talking about here is a wife not girl friend even in some communities knowing shes cheating on you and u still ate what she cooked is enof for you to die withing weeks......my dear run for ur dear life cos next is to kill you cos every unfaithful wife has same of friends that will even encourage her to kill you and be free for your son my dear even if your son grew up not knowing u or she he will still be great if destined=emmyrichie post=31736336]All those who re asking you forgive her, have a heart to a$$ talk with her are all enemies. I bet they won't even seek for opinions before they kick her out.

LEAVE!!! KICK HER out!!! She will definitely contemplate on taking you out of the way to have her way.

She doesn't deserve you. She doesn't love you.

Heart to heart talk is useless in this matter.
She knew what she's doing is dead wrong, yet she's doing it anyway.

She will kill you. Kick her out!!!

Look for your rightful rib, she's out there yearning for your embrace.

Run! Run!! Run!!!

[/quote]

It was just a harmless question.

Skoopy:


I bet you can be more constructive.

On a second thought, have you carried out a DNA test to verify if that boy is truly ours? You never can tell, there could be a stronger bond btw your wife and the man in question than what you think. Just give it a thought, you won't regret doing.

@op So far she still keeps in touch with the guy,plz leave her before you die untimely death. Just a warning from a bro that has been down that road before.

Bros, I doubt if that boy is your son, therefore the first thing to do is to establish that you are the father of that son. then since your wife is lucky to have a good-hearted husband, forgive her for now. The best punishment you can give her is to let her know that you are aware of her runz, but don't make noise, just remain silent about it.

*I will be right back*

Have another relationship as a back-up. It will restore your confidence and sanity, and above all, it will stop us from reading about a nairalander who killed his wife or got killed by his wife. I repeat, find a lady more beautiful than her, and have a romantic affair.

once a cheater will be always a cheater,simple.

Well, you need to confirm that son is yours first by going for a DNA test.

If DNA is positive then talk sense into her, if Negative, peaceful divorce is the solution. That mean she was never your wife!

If the son is confirmed yours.! and she would not change her ways, no be by force oo, go for peaceful divorce before she will kill you one day!.

An adulterer will always kill, if not the husband then herself!!

BE WARNED

82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

I understand your pain brother. My advice is to leave her because she's not remorseful by still seeing the other guy. I'm sure you will find someone else that will love you Anderson still maintain a perfect relationship with your son.

82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

there is nothing as dangerous as having a cheating wife,she can infect you,she and her lover boys might decide to harm or kill you. You dont keep somebody in your home out of sympathy,what i am saying is,collect your son from her and end the marriage before she kills you.

Nigerians are hypocrites .. gosh!!

so you men can't stand a cheating spouse but won't blink twice before putting your deak in every Sandra ruka outside marriage... so you know how exactly it hurts to be cheated on but you just don't care so far you ain't the victim..weak a.s.ses

this same people asking the op to kick her out will tell the 'victim' to exercise patience if it was the other way round.. gosh! most of these men are irritating!

@op its rare seeing a Nigerian man like you ...but its just sad, the other men think you are weak.. its your life, your marriage... but honestly, the woman no try..after a NIGERIAN man forgave your cheating a.s.s , you still went back.. talk about, cheating is in her DNA the ball is in your court.


I wonder why I haven't seen the 'pray, maybe you are not Doing things right, dress sexy, take her out, red boxers,divorce should be the last resort' crew.. oh! maybe cause he's a man!

even @dinachi dropped the divorce card without his usual 'check yourself, you are the reason she cheated' note he do drop if women were the victim thumbs up

only women are to take sh.its

My advice, table the matter before your family. Is your parents still alive? If they are, tell them what your wife did or still doing and do the needful. For me I can't stand a cheating wife.

Laid2001:
Well, you need to confirm that son is yours first by going for a DNA test.

If DNA is positive then talk sense into her, if Negative, peaceful divorce is the solution. That mean she was never your wife!

If the son is confirmed yours.! and she would not change her ways, no be by force oo, go for peaceful divorce before she will kill you one day!.

An adulterer will always kill, if not the husband then herself!!

BE WARNED

if an adulterer will always kill,what is the point in talking sense into her?the bitchh should be kicked out before she kills the guy.

freshdude99:

Rubbish!! No therapy whatsoever has proven to cure a dog that eat shiiits

i'm very sure if it were the man cheating, you would have had a different story.

9jatatafo:
My advice, table the matter before your family. Is your parents still alive? If they are, tell them what your did or still doing and do the needful. For me I can't stand a cheating wife.

table matter before family?say wetin happen?abeg no need of long story,the fokn bitchh should be kicked out,period

I dont really understand what people meant by "my wife cheating on them"?
Do they mean that another man inserted his Pen-is inside her va gi na?
Do they mean that she screamed and enjoyed everything?
Do they mean that the man sucked and squeezes the boobs?
Do they mean she licked the lolipop?
If these are what they meant, then she is not my wife.

IYANGBALI:
if an adulterer will always kill,what is the point in talking sense into her?the bitchh should be kicked out before she kills the guy.

Story!

They should just have a open marriage.
Swinging Thingz! Shikena

firstEVA:
i'm very sure if it were the man cheating, you would have had a different story.

she should also pack out if she can stand a cheating husband,afterall she packed into the man,s house,but she has a lot to lose by packing out,this is africa and second hand woman no too dey sell for market unlike second hand men.

firstEVA:
i'm very sure if it were the man cheating, you would have had a different story.

Rubish,
Fire the woman,
Marry another,
Let the incoming woman know that the reason of her predecessor was infidelity

[quote author=Khabuqi post=31737861]

Story!

They should just have a open marriage.
Swinging Thingz! Shikena[/quote) nursery rhyme

[quote author=IYANGBALI post=31737939][/quote]

nursery ko
rosary ni

see you wey dey form good woman. he should kick her out..blablabla

abeg bo pata e kin ti oko bo e ni idi joo.

You know what to do. pls don't ask for advice coz is strictly the thing of the heart

Oga, you better go for a partenity DNA test fast, sintiments aside, and if the boy is not your son, please LEAVE her sorry ass before she infect you with AIDS . Hope you know there's no cure yet.
It will be better for the boy to have one of the parents than lose both to an incurable STD.