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Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own - Family (5) - Nairaland

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Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 12:30pm On Mar 18, 2015
runnazz:


You r welcome..i meant (OT)orientation as in your attitude, beliefs,feeling as relating the topic
Oh thank you. grin grin

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 12:36pm On Mar 18, 2015
TDstarr:
...once a woman has the tendency to cheat you can't remove it from their blood,

I don't quite agree with you! There are two main reasons people cheat.
1. The natural/insatiable urge to cheat. Men are more prone to this tendency.
2. The need for emotional release. I suspect this could be the reason for Mrs op's wink cheating.

Unless we dig to the root cause, we may not really give a proper and lasting advice.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Urine: 12:45pm On Mar 18, 2015
Amusaopeyemi:
Leave her instead.
Don't score points by cheating on her, doing so is immature.
If she catches you first, she'll turn the table around and believe me it'll be in her favour. We ladies could be so deceitful.
I believe in forgiveness but in this case I don't think forgiveness can work, she forgot her vows. "For better for worse, in sickness and in health, till death do us part" are not mere words. A cheating wife is capable of killing her husband.

82sarahluv, this is the best solution.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by onoja12: 12:46pm On Mar 18, 2015
from the way you are talking she done use juju for you,my guy a man can sleep with 1000 women but he always knows who is number 1,women on the other hand get emotionally attached to who they are sleeping with.so guess what you better waka far quickly before she kills you for the next guy


82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by JoeCutie(m): 1:15pm On Mar 18, 2015
In every story, there's an untold story.

Op, I would like to accuse you, I'm sorry. I'm accusing you here not based on the 'Sin of commission', but on the 'Sin of omission'. You omitted something. There's something you're not telling us. In other words, there's an untold story in this your (told) story.

This is what actually keeps many guys (whose conscience are still very much alive) in their relationships/marriages when their partners cheat. They'd give many reasons for still being in the relationship, leaving the main reason - the truth - untold. What's that reason? They cheat too, or they are cheating. But they've simply not been caught. You're not guilty until you're proven guilty, or in this case, caught. Guys are not in this alone, girls could also be guilty of this.

This would leave every guy (or girl) whose conscience is still up and kicking, thinking. You'd be like..."this thing she (he) did, haven't I done it before"?... "After all, I've done this (many times) before". These and more would be going on in your mind and most times, you'd be forced to reconsider, and then tamper Justice with mercy. Unless, like I rightfully pointed out ab initio, you're one of those whose conscience were killed and buried with Abacha. cheesy

"Let he who has not done this be the first to cast a stone...". Mind you, infidelity is one of the most degrading controversies a man/woman in a relationship/marriage could ever find themselves in. It's a very bad thing to do. We are better than that.

You might be wondering how I know this or how I came up with this opinion. Perhaps I've done it? Yeah, that's probably what you're thinking. I know. But No. Instead... Psychology is a wonderful bastard. grin

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Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by plaetton: 1:33pm On Mar 18, 2015
You effing m. Or. On,
You definitely have self-esteem issues, that's why the Bxxch is walking all over you.

Ditch the Bxxch or you very well deserve whatever she is giving you.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by TruthisOut: 2:34pm On Mar 18, 2015
I have had such experience before. It is only God that will make a cheater repent. Talk is needless, you can pray that's what the good side of me will tell you but the real side? Leave her to her folly. Women are not like guys. A guy can slept with a lady without getting emotionally attached. But for a lady to open her legs for a guy means she feels something strong for him (I am not talking about prostitutes).

I know you know the right thing to do but you are suffering from indecision, it is normal in cases of this nature. So this is what you should do (it works every time!):
1. Talk to her about your recent discovery and kick her out regardless of her explanation. angry angry
2. When her lover jilts her, she will regain her sense and come back. cool cool
3. Console her and kick her out again regardless of her explanation. grin cool grin
4. Don't forget to find a new and worthy pu**y - it helps with curing indecision. grin

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Babaji111(m): 3:15pm On Mar 18, 2015
I don't know how you feel but for me I can't even stay with a cheating wife. For over thirteen (13) years of my marriage, God knows better, I have never have sex with another woman.

If for once, I came to realise my wife is not faithful to me, it is OVER. If she is having problems with me in bed or whatsoever and she couldn't cope, let her tell me in simple terms. Marriage is a social contract based on mutual trust, understanding, love and care. If one party fails to stick to principles and go SOLO, he/she should be made to swallow the bitter pills.

I will not advice you to send your wife packing but call her attention and discuss this issue thoroughly since you still loves her. Finally, the man following your wive shouldn't be left 'eating the apples' freely.

2 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Darteyyyy(m): 4:24pm On Mar 18, 2015
Op.... Run!!!!!
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by tiredface: 4:29pm On Mar 18, 2015
SHE CHEATED AND STILL TALKING WITH THE LOVER BOY AND YOU'RE WONDERING WHETHER TO DO THE SAME?. FUNNY, HOW OLD ARE YOU,DUDE?
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by cococandy(f): 4:39pm On Mar 18, 2015
Is it not nairaland again? If the case were reversed, anyone who makes the comment they made would be the evil one trying to ruin people's marriages.

Sickening hypocrisy.
quivah:
Nigerians are hypocrites .. gosh!!

so you men can't stand a cheating spouse but won't blink twice before putting your deak in every Sandra ruka outside marriage... so you know how exactly it hurts to be cheated on but you just don't care so far you ain't the victim..weak a.s.ses

this same people asking the op to kick her out will tell the 'victim' to exercise patience if it was the other way round.. gosh! most of these men are irritating!

@op its rare seeing a Nigerian man like you ...but its just sad, the other men think you are weak.. its your life, your marriage... but honestly, the woman no try..after a NIGERIAN man forgave your cheating a.s.s , you still went back.. talk about, cheating is in her DNA cheesy the ball is in your court.


I wonder why I haven't seen the 'pray, maybe you are not Doing things right, dress sexy, take her out, red boxers,divorce should be the last resort' crew.. oh! maybe cause he's a man!

even @dinachi dropped the divorce card without his usual 'check yourself, you are the reason she cheated' note he do drop if women were the victim smiley thumbs up

only women are to take sh.itscheesycheesy
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Ewuro4: 5:10pm On Mar 18, 2015
82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

You forgave her and brought her back into your life. You can still make this work.

Call up her family and have a round table discussion. ( excluding yours cos no sane parent will allow such).

If she still persist, I'd tell you what I'd tell my blood brother, cut her off and pick yourself up. Life goes on my dear.

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 5:34pm On Mar 18, 2015
JoeCutie:
In every story, there's an untold story. grin

I was attracted by your opening statement, but a read into your writeup shows a smart blend of repetitions, rhetorics, fallacies and gests. sad

I don't think that's what the op needs. What he is asking for Is how he can salvage his marriage, if the marriage can be salvaged.

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Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by MISSCONGENIALITY(f): 5:36pm On Mar 18, 2015
Show her more love. It might help.

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 6:16pm On Mar 18, 2015
Iyalasisi:
me seff dey wonder say shey dis kain good hearted man still dey... shocked

good hearted or foolish hearted?
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Avalani(m): 6:34pm On Mar 18, 2015
82sarahluv:
My wife has cheated on me during a tough time for us. We got back together 2 months ago, but I found out she is still in touch with him. Should I leave her, or have an affair of my own? We have a 5 year old son - this is why I'm not able to consider leaving her easily.
Thanks to all of you who have not jumped on the 'having my own affair' part. I only added this as an option because, her having an affair completely shattered my confidence as a man and is affecting my personal and professional life. I have considered an affair as a way to prove to myself that I can still have a partner if we separate. But now I realize how silly that is. I'm going to try talking it out with her again and resolve this like a man, and hope that will restore confidence in myself.

I believe if you had real evidence (and not just strong suspicions) that she had sex with someone else (willingly, intentionally, romantically), then you have no business being in a relationship with her still. The fact that you chose to "talk" in my opinion is the reason why she is still in contact with her lover. It's hard for her, and even myself, having read your words, to see you as a real man. You can be a father to your baby regardless. What happens if she cheats again? Scratch that, she's probably cheating still. And I don't blame her. You are weak and afraid, I think
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by kpolli(m): 6:49pm On Mar 18, 2015
If it's the woman at fault; please forgive her.... But if it is the man; dump him or revenge!!!

I love family section

2 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Dyt(f): 7:05pm On Mar 18, 2015
kpolli:
If it's the woman at fault; please forgive her.... But if it is the man; dump him or revenge!!!

I love family section


cheesy cheesy cheesy
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by animbakara: 7:12pm On Mar 18, 2015
Forgive her and let her conscience judge her
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by JoeCutie(m): 8:13pm On Mar 18, 2015
kovak:


I was attracted by your opening statement, but a read into your writeup shows a smart blend of repetitions, rhetorics, fallacies and gests. sad

I don't think that's what the op needs. What he is asking for Is how he can salvage his marriage, if the marriage can be salvaged.
embarassed lipsrsealed
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by sacostyles(m): 8:16pm On Mar 18, 2015
Separation doesn't mean not forgiving angry
It simply means I forgive you but stay the hell away from me untill you change.

My brother OP might have a crystal heart but I'm sure if you had beautiful pearls you woulndn't put it on a pig.
Even God separted from his people when they were adulterous
kennygee:
He can forgive her.

Retaliating won't make her Uncheat.

He will just hurt himself more.

Matthew 18:21-22

Then Peter came and said to Him, "Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times?"
Jesus said to him, "I do not say to you, up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by dinachi(m): 8:27pm On Mar 18, 2015
MISSCONGENIALITY:
Show her more love. It might help.
Would you show more love to a cheating husband? Stop being a hypochrite!
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by dinachi(m): 8:32pm On Mar 18, 2015
Sophyrocks:
Fast and pray mister! Fast and pray! Find nice boxers, look good, get rid of your pot belly, mouth and body odour!! Love her more and more. Before you know it, at a speed of light, she will change. Fiam!!!! Dnt divorce her o. Your children will suffer in the hands of a wicked step mom. You dnt know what the next woman has in store for you or have you forgotten what time it is? Its the period of scarce good wives. No woman is a saint so make your marriage work and water your garden. The grass looks greener on the other side but all that gllitters isnt gold.
OP for whatever your life is worth please do not listen to this evil advice from one of the accolytes of babyosisi the scammer in chief. This advice is meant to turn you to a wussy.
Kick her out already! Infact, your next post should be about your successful divorce from your evil,cheating ex-wife!
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 8:37pm On Mar 18, 2015
Sophyrocks:
Fast and pray mister! Fast and pray! Find nice boxers, look good, get rid of your pot belly, mouth and body odour!! Love her more and more. Before you know it, at a speed of light, she will change. Fiam!!!! Dnt divorce her o. Your children will suffer in the hands of a wicked step mom. You dnt know what the next woman has in store for you or have you forgotten what time it is? Its the period of scarce good wives. No woman is a saint so make your marriage work and water your garden. The grass looks greener on the other side but all that gllitters isnt gold.

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by dinachi(m): 8:37pm On Mar 18, 2015
Midehi:
dont have an affair,let her continue to see your faithfulnes & dedication to her, i know its difficult but its the best, ignore her cheating,pretend you dont see it, with time she will come to her conclusion that she has been making fool of herself & hurting you,she will wonder what kind of man you are,she will fear & come to beg you sincerely & love you back especially when who shes cheating with disappoint her.
Give her time,she will come to her senses soon but be very careful with her in terms of healthwise she may have contacted, dont joke with your life.
Goodluck & God gives you the grace to endure.
but some women sha!!!!
You see your life? See the kind evil advice you are giving somebody s brother. Will you do all these things you are telling him if your husband is constantly cheating on you? Stop being a hypochrite. Yours is a wicked advice. Pls keep it to yourself.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 8:50pm On Mar 18, 2015
dinachi:

You see your life? See the kind evil advice you are giving somebody s brother. Will you do all these things you are telling him if your husband is constantly cheating on you? Stop being a hypochrite. Yours is a wicked advice. Pls keep it to yourself.
guy check your life..so your best advice is divorce or murder her, pls grow up, this is husband & wife not boyfriend & girlfriend

1 Like

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by dinachi(m): 9:03pm On Mar 18, 2015
Midehi:

guy check your life..so your best advice is divorce or murder her, pls grow up, this is husband & wife not boyfriend & girlfriend
Carry the rotten graveyard between your legs away from here! This is marriage with a woman who has no single respect for her husband nor her marital vows.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 9:12pm On Mar 18, 2015
dinachi:

Carry the rotten graveyard between your legs away from here! This is marriage with a woman who has no single respect for her husband nor her marital vows.
you are very stupid to start that insult there...it dosnt take time to know idiots on nairaland

2 Likes

Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Phoenixfrank(m): 9:19pm On Mar 18, 2015
Kudos nigga u dropped the problem and solution am Impressed. So ama ask you to confirm the situation be sure she is cheating and talk things out and it doesn't work sex starve her, beat her ass, batter her face and divorce the LovePeddler. sorry she is ur wife
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by dinachi(m): 9:21pm On Mar 18, 2015
Midehi:

you are very stupid to start that insult there...it dosnt take time to know idiots on nairaland
Rotten puccy, the graveyard between your legs is not the end of your curse until you run stark raving mad in the market place. From your statement it is very clear to every discerning mind that you did not come from a vagina but your cursed mother excreted you from her rotten anus! grin grin grin. You are a curse to your generation with the kind of evil advice you give to a good man such as the OP. grin grin grin.
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 9:24pm On Mar 18, 2015
[quote author=dinachi post=31759978][/quote]
tank u. God bless you for insulting my mother
Re: Should I Leave My Cheating Wife, Or Have An Affair Of My Own by Nobody: 9:25pm On Mar 18, 2015
dinachi:

Rotten puccy, the graveyard between your legs is not the end of your curse until you run stark raving mad in the market place. From your statement it is very clear to every discerning mind that you did not come from a vagina but your cursed mother excreted you from her rotten anus! grin grin grin. You are a curse to your generation with the kind of evil advice you give to a good man such as the OP. grin grin grin.
tank u..God bless you for insulting my mother

1 Like

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