Please share the challenges, you faced before marrying your spouse. They say true love conquers all, but are their some challenges that conquer you. Examples of challenges are muslim/christian marriages, inter-tribal marriages, mean inlaws. Kindly share your challenges as they pertain to your relationship and if you would do it all again,

Im not married but im looking forward to the responses.

OMO IBO:

Im not married but im looking forward to the responses.

ditto

Actually none!

Challenges like what? I didn't have any of the issues you mentioned.

And no, true love does not conquer all.

@poster
finding the true love of ur life who will understand, tolerate ur weakness and treat u with dignity, still facing this challenge cos i ain't married

i am looking forward to responses as well,

Well examples of challenges, I have heard of and witnessed,

The Yoruba-Ibo twist: where the in-laws oppose the union of the children due to their different tribes,

The Ijebu-Ekiti twist: in laws say they would not support such a marriage because Ijebus are jujuists, lol

The Muslim- Christian twist: in laws are from opposing religions and as such are not in support of such a union

I would like to know if anyone has been thru the above situation and if they ended up getting married and if the marriage is rosy or if they wish they never ventured into it

M friend right now is a christian and her husband to be is also a christian but his parents are moslems and as such oppose the union and refuse to do the traditional wedding infact refuse to do any wedding, so that is an example of a challenge, so now she is wondering whether to proceed or not, so that's what aroused my curiousity that maybe if other people share their experiences, it would help her make a wise decision,

so let the sharing begin,

miss reese:

Please share the challenges, you faced before marrying your spouse. They say true love conquers all, but are their some challenges that conquer you. Examples of challenges are muslim/christian marriages, inter-tribal marriages, mean inlaws. Kindly share your challenges as they pertain to your relationship and if you would do it all again,

I'm Black American. He is Yoruba. I didn't know of the non-approval until after the engagement. I had no clue that things like this would happen to me . This should have been explained to me before the ring and popping the big question. I deserve the right to know the challenges that I/we should be facing. Now everything is just difficult Although love does make you a fighter and God offers the strength, but it truly wakes you up. Things definitely have to be put out on the table now. Its almost like hiding the truth when intentions, expectations, and challenges are not shared (big ones like mine and @topic, not trivial things that will be learned throughout marriage). Those big challenges will have a big impact on the future if they are not solved or deeply understood from the very beginning .

@btrue,

thanks so much for sharing, but could u clarify more what challenges your facing, is it due to your nationality or what? please elaborate, thanks once again for sharing,

well i am yoruba and have been married to an ibo lady for 5 years now and even though we got married very early (i was 25 & she was 25 too) or almost immediately after we left the university it's been fun fun fun and fun all the way,well i did meet a few brick walls from the mum initially but not a very thick one sha but with my elder brothers who advised me to get more closer to my father in-law (since he was accomodating from on set) and that did the magic for us,i think your friend should look for out who is more accomodating to him/her and get closer i believe that will work the magic too

I'm still searching

btrue:

I'm Black American. He is Yoruba. I didn't know of the non-approval until after the engagement. I had no clue that things like this would happen to me . This should have been explained to me before the ring and popping the big question. I deserve the right to know the challenges that I/we should be facing. Now everything is just difficult Although love does make you a fighter and God offers the strength, but it truly wakes you up. Things definitely have to be put out on the table now. Its almost like hiding the truth when intentions, expectations, and challenges are not shared (big ones like mine and @topic, not trivial things that will be learned throughout marriage). Those big challenges will have a big impact on the future if they are not solved or deeply understood from the very beginning .

So sorry to hear that btrue. What are the challenges you are facing exactly?

To be honest, I don't know why adults can't talk to their parents and let them know exactly what they are going to allow and not allow, as respectfully as possible. I mean, I can't see my parents being difficult if I chose to or if my younger siblings choose to marry a non Nigerian / non Yoruba person. It's just not going to happen. Why? Because we (all the siblings) talk to them and let them know that they are being unChristian, have led their lives and we have our lives to live. You can't let other people control you. We're talking about responsible adults here, not those who are obviously marrying someone unfit for them. For us, the underlying factor is that the person has to be a Christian so if that holds true and there are two consenting, responsible adults, then God bless.

I know there are extremely difficult parents out there and I'm thankful I don't have those, but come on, difficult decisions have to be made. We can't let anyone, family or not, destroy our own marriages/families. It's unacceptable. Life is way too short.

Well my biggest challenge was leaving my fiance for another man 
That man is now my husband and I couldn't be happier.
I lost many friends temporarily in the process.
I have no regrets whatsoever.
Before saying "I do" the individuals have a right to say "I don't", anytime.

Well my spouse is Nigerian and i am English - BIG problems from both sides of the family as you can imagine. But i never once doubted ending my relationship because of it and i couldn't be happier.

**osisi:

Well my biggest challenge was leaving my fiance for another man 
That man is now my husband and I couldn't be happier.
I lost many friends temporarily in the process.
I have no regrets whatsoever.
Before saying "I do" the individuals have a right to say "I don't", anytime.

said it twice and so glad i did. marrying the wrong person is a jail sentence in my book

POSTER

I will come back when i get married!

First, I'm from Ondo state and my wife is from Ogun state (Ijebu-Ode).

Moreover, her parents are muslim while I'm a christian.

We dated for 10 years before we got married. During the early part of our relationship, her parents told her she could not get marry to a christian hence, she should find a way of putting an end to the relationship.

Not long after dat, I went home and my dad asked me about my relationship (we are very close) and I told him. He gave me a thousand and one reasons why I must not marry an Ijebu woman. Notwithstanding, i was able to talk him out of it.

After about 2 years into the relationship, the pressure from my angel's parents were so much that we had to painfully let things go.

We stopped seeing each other for some times, but we kept contacts cos our hearts could not let go. After she finished from school, she was able to convince her dad about her resolve to stay sticked by me no matter what.

To God be the glory, today we are together as huband and wife; can't bargain for more