Beautiful and Brilliant, Thats what she was, atleast to me.
We met that faithful evening , i went to their house with her brother who was my best friend then.
I was New in Town, Fresh out of secondary school.

I was uncomfortable throughout my stay in their house. I guess she liked me instantly cos she never left my presence. Then i asked her for a glass of water even though i wasnt thirsty.
That night when i got home , i bought an excersize book and started writing down my feelings for her.
I sent a letter to her asking her if she would be my girlfriend, She agreed without thinking about it.
That was how SHE came into my life.
I changed a lot because of my love for her. She was an angel.

I felt like giving her everything i have. She never accepted my money. Always telling me to keep them. I was on top of the world. We used to have little quarrels but we usually reconcile the following day cos i was always ready to accept the fault even if it was her fault.


Then someday somehow, she started saying that i smoke and drink beer.
Before i had the chance to do anything , she was gone. Straight to the arms of another guy who lived a stone throw from my house. That was how she left my world. I wrote series of letters begging her, But obviously she planned her exit well. Well i got mocked, laughed at and ashamed. It was difficult for me to handle because i became the news. So i had to leave town and moved to Lagos. She got admission in a university in Lagos. Then i thought that i had a chance to make things good again but she was reluctant to pay attention to me.

I visited her in the school but that was all that was to it. Then i left Nigeria.
It was difficult for me to date another girl, so i gave no one no chance to break my heart again.

In 2006, i went to Nigeria and called her. We met again , i thought i will find the love back in her, but it was gone as soon as i saw her. I took her out though, but drove her back to her place in the evening. I was sure she wanted us to be together again then but my love for her died many years ago.
That was the last time i saw her. I left Lagos and went to my home state to spend my Holiday.
She called me many times but i didnt pick the calls.
She sent hate text messages to me but i ignored them too.
Then i went back to Europe. Two weeks ago, SHE found me on Google search and showed up on facebook.
She is telling me now how much she loved me then, and how much she hope to someday kiss me one last time.
She said she want us to be friends again, {JUST FRIENDS - as she put it}. She is not married yet.
I am not confused on what to do because i already closed the door to my little heart for ladies.

My question is for people who have experience on issues like this.
Where do you all think this is leading to?
I am not a person who like keeping enemies but then where do i put this girl?
How wise is it to even think about calling her my friend again?

Let her be your friend if you want to and dont date her if you dont want to cuz u might I want to out of pity as she may become a pest,

Sammie. . . Am sorry. i have no idea. . .

If I were in your shoes, I woudlnt even want her in my life and I dont want to know her at all anymore@ she cvan go burn herself in HADES for all I care!

This kinda person is NOT wortH YOUR TIME! She take things for granted and when its all hers, she will never appreciate it.

sammie, Leave her and dont even treat her as your so call friend. Friends do not treat friends as such no matter what!

If you don't want this girl anymore, don't call her again or fill her head with false thought. Be frank! Your feelings are dead and gone.

@poster: like d way you write
@topic: whatever floats ur boat.

She could be ur friend if u want to,but let her know that at the moment,u're way too big for her,if u have a girlfriend/fiancee,pls introduce both of them,i believe this surely will send a signal to her that u makin her ur friend does not mean u want to still make up wit her,but to let her know she means less of a person to u

C2H5OH:

If you don't want this girl anymore, don't call her again or fill her head with false thought. Be frank! Your feelings are dead and gone.

I didnt say i call her anymore.
The last time i called was back in 2006.
She found me on facebook.

omo, if you can avoid her completely, please do. i used the word "can" cos i know it not all that easy. in my dairy, i could not find love for women last time i checked. they are all piece of opportunists. if you allow her in, you are in for doom. it is usually called "second missionary journey" ask those who crossed that bridge if they were able to find their way back, you will be wrecked man. be wise. as for me, i'm thinking of having a child with a Nigerian, not for the sake of love or wife, just to have my kid and train him or her to my satisfaction. i'm not a fan for men and women affair and all that, there are always a clause at the middle or the end. good luck

I am not thinking about welcoming her back, Nah.

I am thinking if she is worth being ordinary friend.
Everything i felt for her left long ago.
I dont know if its wiser to just ignore her or pretend that we are friends or what?

It wont be fair to just shut her out like that. An eye for an eye never work for me.

na you know what you want in the friendship. ciao

be a man, the girl does not deserve, infant she don`t know what she want in a man for the first place that`s why she left you for another man, ans she will continue rolling untill she will gather no moss.
to be yourself does not mean that you people are enemies, just keep her at arms lenght

. . .put her in the trash can.

hey if you want to be friends ok, but note that women are not easy to resist, wen close to especially the once u've had something with even if you are the holiest of all men you will still be tempted so to not make a mistake try as much as you can to aviod her that way there will be no had i known. ve been there i know wat am telling you but if you still feel like making her your friend let her know that you dont want her any more if possible introduce you date to her that is if you have one but if not and you dont want her then just be frank with her she'll understand

cheers

please don't give her a chance to completely wreck you; tell her that perhaps in the next world it will be different but for now you got other things on the horizon and she not one of those things.

never allow her to come to your life and shatter it again,she is indicisive and does not know what is good for her,when the going is good,she wants to be your friend again,what prompted her to live earlier?GUY SIMPLY TELL HER TO KEEP AWAY FROM YOU

spikedcylinder:

The chronological of you and all these girls is amusing!

To think all this was inspired by a friend's request on facebook, one might wonder if she's taking it as seriously as you?

You may have your points but you will be convinced beyond doubt if i paste her messages here.
I stay invisible on facebook whenever she showed up there.

I dont also have to wait to find out if she is serious or not.
There is no need. Maybe you have never been subjected to ridicule.
Where people you boasted to about someone suddenly realized that you were just boasting for what you cant really hold.

@ poster
(i am not trying to insult you) you took a cowards way out, why didn't you just tell her that you didn't feel the same any more the last time you saw her. Don't you know that some people just hold on to that love and they can't let go until they know for sure that it's over.
If i were you i wouldn't even be her friend because she is still hopping that maybe some day you can be together again. Free the girl and put her out of her misery

Well i dont know the kind of freedom you want me to give her.
If i can stay for years without calling her or even remembering her,
i wonder if she would be silly enough to be holding her love for me.

Besides, i didnt say she wants to be my girlfriend again.
She suggested ordinary friendship which i am very reluctant to consider.

I also dont know about you but there is always a little thing left for someone you loved dearly even when she got married to another person.
Its something you cant erase cos you dont see it.

spikedcylinder:

How come its only you girls do this to? Maybe you take things too seriously and you're quick to be "ridiculed".

Muse on it.

wait a minute here, This is a different experience.
It has nothing to do with what you are refering to here.
I am sure some people have had more than 5 relationships which ended up bad. right?

So if i have enough courage to write mine without hiding under some funny username, and seek for what people will have to say,
I believe you should know that i am someone who says things the way they are.
Besides if i dont take relationships serious, what do you think will come out of it.
No need claiming to be tuff. I am sure some people would have used violence in cases like this.
Maybe hitting a lady or insulting her or abusing her.

These things happen and i dont talk about it. I always talk about it when they wanna come back.

cylinder
It appears you did not read his reply to your first post.

He said

Sam Milla:

You may have your points but you will be convinced beyond doubt if i paste her messages here.
I stay invisible on facebook whenever she showed up there.

I dont also have to wait to find out if she is serious or not.
There is no need. Maybe you have never been subjected to ridicule.
Where people you boasted to about someone suddenly realized that you were just boasting for what you cant really hold.

spikedcylinder:

She didn't even suggest being your friend Sam. Facebook friend requests can hardly be seen as such. She might just want to increase her friends list is all.

It seems you are having fun with this topic.
Are you trying to teach me how facebook work now?
So i dont know what a friends request mean again?

She wishes to kiss you one last time and still be friends . . . how is that possible?

@topic

why do you want to have her as a friend after what she did? She broke your heart, make you move first to Lagos and then to Europe, you didn't let a new girl in your heart after that? She isn't worth that!!

Why torture yourself again? As soon as she can talk to you again she will bring up the past. Is that what you want? Your hiding already when she is online on facebook? I guess you answered that question yourself already if you want her as a friend then. Move on and find new love,

@Samgbam

What else do you want?? You have moved on with your life, your feelings has died for the chick and you are not within her reach. So what else? why don't you call her and tell her how you feel, afterall all she wanted is just a friendship as she put it. And if she start jiving, hit the road!!

spikedcylinder:

I'm not having fun, I can never have fun at your expense Sam. All I'm saying is, maybe you shouldn't read too much into things. Accept her friend's request and see what she has to say. Its your choice really.

Spike, you seem not to get me.

Her facebook friends request was accepted two weeks ago without much thinking.
Actually i was glad she found me there.
That wasnt an issue at all.
We chat on facebook chat software. got it?

She writes messages to my walls when i m not online or when i go invisible.
Added her new phone number and asked me to call.

I only said she found me on facebook.
I m not afraid of this girl or anybody for that matter.
I am not even considering anything about her.
To me, she was gone forever. Thats where i stand.
Its just that ignoring people is never an option.

I prefer to keep these things quiet but they always come back, and when they do, i seek for people's opinions before doing something silly.

spikedcylinder:

So your fear now is that if you start calling her again, the feelings will return?

The feeling never left, he's just here bumping his grill. He couldn't keep it to himself any longer.