Many times when a relationship ends, one of the only things that provide any sort of solace at all is the fact that, through the course of the courtship, you’ve learned things that contributed to it not ultimately working out—and that you can use this newfound knowledge to improve your next relationship. (This is, of course, considering you ever recover enough to pursue another romantic interest and stop sobbing on the couch while you chug Johnnie Walker and listen to Elliott Smith.)

Like, for example, after my last relationship imploded, I learned that you can’t be a pushover if you really want a relationship to work. You may think it's a good idea to fawn all over someone and pretty much let them have their way without your ever doing or even saying anything about it, but if you do that, eventually one of two things will happen: (1) They’ll grow tired not being challenged and decide to move on without you, or (2) You’ll snap and call things off yourself.
But that's just my experience...so I asked a bunch of guys to tell us what they’ve learned from the failings of past relationships.

1. “I learned to never, ever say something like, ‘I’d probably be better off without you’ to someone you love. It won’t end well.”—Nathaniel W.

2. “You have to pick your fights. My ex and I were so, so, so stubborn about pretty much everything—probably especially about the littler things, and after a while that broke us, I think. When we weren’t arguing about something, it was like we were walking on egg shells trying not to say or do the thing that would launch us into the next fight. I definitely learned that while you’re never going to always agree with the person you’re with, you should really make an effort to only fight over things when they really matter. If you take a step back and really think about things before you start screaming, I think it’ll help.” —Casey F.

3. “My breakup happened after we’d been together for almost five years, starting in high school and coming just before the end of college. I learned that people change over time and that you not only have to accept that and roll with it in any way you can, but you also have to sometimes be ready to acknowledge it if and when one or both of you have changed so much that the relationship is no longer something that’s going to be sustainable. It’s depressing, but it’s also life. Breaking up or getting divorced these days is more common because it’s more socially accepted that you might drift from a person you love over time and then call it quits. To me, this makes marriage a bigger deal, too. Anyway, sorry...yeah…I learned that people change.” —Blake A.

4. “A couple relationships ago, it ended because I was cheated on. When I found out, it was one of the worst feelings I’ve ever felt in my life. So I learned that you should never cheat. Even though I probably already knew that. I also learned to be wary of dating anyone who has cheated in the past. It makes it more difficult to trust them, for sure, because how can you be sure they’re not going to do it again? It’s kind of like trusting your life to someone who has killed unjustly before." —Scott P.

5. “My ex-boyfriend and I moved in together way before we were ready to share that kind of space. We did it because—and this is really common in New York City—because his lease was up and I was excited to pay half of what I had been for my one bedroom apartment. I can’t stress how much those are not the best reasons for moving in with a significant other. By the time we realized we weren’t ready to live together, going back to living apart wasn’t something we wanted to do, but staying together wasn’t, either.” —Seth B.

continue>> http://www.datingyouths..com

who cares about a failed relationship

misspicy:
who cares about a failed relationship

And if you dont really care about it... to think of learning from it,
then the rate of failed relationships wouldnt drop!

NEVER!!!

okay

donTbone:

And if you dont really care about it... to think of learning from it,
then the rate of failed relationships wouldnt drop!

NEVER!!!

says who?

Do you know that every human being is a unique being,what worked for A might not work for B

that thing that made your former relationship breakup can be the thing that will make the new one flourish
There is nothing to learn from a failed relationship,its a closed chapter,you move on to the next person,study them and enjoy the ride,not trying to apply things from the last relationship with them because they are two different persons

get it?

misspicy:

says who?

Do you know that every human being is a unique being,what worked for A might not work for B

that thing that made your former relationship breakup can be the thing that will make the new one flourish
There is nothing to learn from a failed relationship,its a closed chapter,you move on to the next person,study them and enjoy the ride,not trying to apply things from the last relationship with them because they are two different persons

get it?

Yea.. gerrit...

But that wouldnt say i shouldnt learn from my past!
It only makes me get better not to demean the next
relatinship am going into.

Get it?

donTbone:
Yea.. gerrit...
But that wouldnt say i shouldnt learn from my past! It only makes me get better not to demean the next relatinship am going into.
Get it?

yeah got it.
still shouldn't be a yardstick for a next one

donTbone:
Yea.. gerrit...
But that wouldnt say i shouldnt learn from my past! It only makes me get better not to demean the next relatinship am going into.
Get it?

yeah got it.
still shouldn't be a yardstick for a next one

donTbone:

Yea.. gerrit...

But that wouldnt say i shouldnt learn from my past!
It only makes me get better not to demean the next
relatinship am going into.

Get it?

ever learning, never arriving at knowledge.

seems you are still learning from your failed relationships, or maybe your relationships are simply zoned like that.


just saying.

tpiar:


ever learning, never arriving at knowledge.

seems you are still learning from your failed relationships, or maybe your relationships are simply zoned like that.


just saying.

OK! thread closed!!!


Can you go play now...