i hope this doesn't sound stupid b4 all of u but i love mixed children, how they look but i'm sure i don't want to marry a white man. i still love my black guys but is it wrong to want to have at least one child from a white man but still not end up marrying him?

Not all wants are good for us.
You know what is best for you and there is nothing wrong in you wanting it and making it happen.
Just make sure you can handle all that comes with it

MrCrackles:

Poster

Yes it right. . . .And now do us a favour, dont open ridiculous or stupid threads ever again ok?!

How is it a stupid thread? u didnt have to say anything, u should have just passed by.

Georgette$:

How is it a stupid thread? u didnt have to say anything, u should have just passed by.

yes is stupid if you dint want to marry one why want a baby from them , stupid women you better pass them when E born for white? abeg hang up with your black guy useless

Georgette$:

i hope this doesn't sound stupid b4 all of u but i love mixed children, how they look but i'm sure i don't want to marry a white man. i still love my black guys but is it wrong to want to have at least one child from a white man but still not end up marrying him?

Yes, it does sound stupid.

No, it is not wrong for YOU.

//

Personally i think people should be able to express themselves freely on nairaland , no matter how stupid they might sound, no one is perfect and we all believe we can get answers to our stupid or sensible questions here since we can't say they out to people we know, so poster please do whatever you feel like but whatever decision you make just make sure you can handle it now and later on in future.

Serious vanity

Wow. What now - ethnicity selecting so you can have the "cuter" kids. That is totally f"£ked up. There are some people who struggle to get pregnant period. There are others who are praying for healthy kids with 10 fingers, 10 toes and all senses in order. You are clearly extremely immature.

absolutely fabulous did this some years ago.  yes it your life. go ahead and create your own oyinbo.  did they tell you they are more likely to have mental health issues too?

GEW:

did they tell you they are more likely to have mental issues too?

WTF Mental Issues??!?!? Please, tell me where on Earth you dug that up from,

mrsb:

WTF Mental Issues??!?!? Please, tell me where on Earth you dug that up from,

enjoy nigerian sunshine madam.  go ask social workers about mental health issues they will tell you.

? Um its rainy season dear so I am not enjoying any sunshine.

Keep your ignorant and sweeping generalisations to yourself.

Arrow.

mrsb:

? Um its rainy season dear so I am not enjoying any sunshine.

Keep your ignorant and sweeping generalisations to yourself.

Arrow.

are you drunk or what is your problem? how do you think you know everything.

I don't think I know everything. Lagos is pretty flooded right now and has been almost daily for the past few weeks - this plus the fact that it is July kind of adds up to it being rainy season right now.

I don't believe mixed race kids are more likely to have mental issues. I believe any child who grows up in a broken home or is unloved/maltreated by their parents, or doesn't understand where they are from or has no sense of spiritual belonging is more likely to have mental issues. I believe that any child who grows up amongst love, compassion and understanding and has access to church/mosque/school etc. will grow up to be A.OK whether their parents are black/white or pink/purple.

I am sorry I called you a Arrow. You are not a Arrow (I assume), there is someone in my office really irritating me today and I transfered that to you.

mrsb:

I don't think I know everything. Lagos is pretty flooded right now and has been almost daily for the past few weeks - this plus the fact that it is July kind of adds up to it being rainy season right now.

I don't believe mixed race kids are more likely to have mental issues. I believe any child who grows up in a broken home or is unloved/maltreated by their parents, or doesn't understand where they are from or has no sense of spiritual belonging is more likely to have mental issues. I believe that any child who grows up amongst love, compassion and understanding and has access to church/mosque/school etc. will grow up to be A.OK whether their parents are black/white or pink/purple.

I am sorry I called you a Arrow. You are not a Arrow (I assume), there is someone in my office really irritating me today and I transfered that to you.

u surprised me that was why i asked if someone missed pure water with ogogoro for you. our mind is our personal properties we are allowed to believe whatever we choose to believe. anyway your sins are forgiven.  i was going to look for you in lagos to settle this matter when i am there in september.
you may want to google absolutely fabulous and watch an episode with jeniffer and her half cast throphy  kid. 
on a more serious note there are too many of them within the care system in england that it doesnt appeal to me.

ignore that person troubling you becos it is not worth it. that is what nigerians do best brew trouble 24/7.

Ab Fab is a PARODY. Are you really basing an opinion on a fictitious comedy show

For most of us (I would hope), our children are an extension of our loving marriages and a blessing from God - they are loved, cherished and educated - they are not "trophies".

As for kids in care - there are too many kids in care period - whether they are mixed race, chinese, white, asian, black etc. but the simple fact is that for many of them, it is the best and safest place for them. It's actually tragic.

mrsb:

Ab Fab is a PARODY. Are you really basing an opinion on a fictitious comedy show

you are trying to be funny now?  you want me to set that wind up person on you again.  you know i didnt mean that.

you just brought your rain to england now. we have had good weather until you mentioned rain.

note the fact that this girl ruled out marraige

Georgette$:

i hope this doesn't sound stupid b4 all of u but i love mixed children, how they look but i'm sure i don't want to marry a white man. i still love my black guys but is it wrong to want to have at least one child from a white man but still not end up marrying him?

Being in an interracial marriage is not an easy thing. Bring children into the mix is even harder. Understanding a child who has taken after your spouse is much easier if you have your spouse there to advise you. I cannot even imagine why a person would seek to bring a child into the world if you do not wish to be with a white person. What would make you to think that you, who doesn't have the commitment to be with a man of a different race, is qualified to best care for a child of mixed race.

What if this child bears no resemblance to you at all? What if this child is very very pale? Will this child be raised in the village with everyone staring at Him/Her? Will a black man want to bring up a child that is so obviously not his? Maybe this child will even be called albino. Shame on you trying to breed a child for colour? Are you ashamed to be a black woman? What is wrong with your colour that you should decide to play God mixing up a cross bred just for show?

I am not talking of mixed race children with loving parents. Both there to help and support the child. To help them to be understood. Just this crazy desire to make a baby just to have a fair one. Its just wrong for a baby to be conceived for this purpose.

Please consider the child and don't think of bringing a child that will never know his/her father for your own selfish purposes.

so you just to marry/date a "white" man all for the simple reason of having a mixed child

what r u still waiting for

the sky is your limit, carry go jor. na you sabi

what a wonderful idea
after the white man try a chinese
Chinese mixed with black is even cuter
stupid girl!

Yes, you're wrong because the child would suffer the consequences - I don't know maybe some people have become used to it but single parenthood is never good.

If you plan to marry the white man, fine. But the other just sounds stupid, what makes you think a 'black man' would even want you after you've mothered a baby for a white man for such a shallow reason? tsk.

$$osisi:

what a wonderful idea
after the white man try a chinese
Chinese mixed with black is even cuter
stupid girl!

You are wrong, Ape pikin looks better, so tell the sista to get busy with some Apes, and God is good we have one for Nija, unke Sege.

chiogo:

Yes, you're wrong because the child would suffer the consequences - I don't know maybe some people have become used to it but single parenthood is never good.

If you plan to marry the white man, fine. But the other just sounds stupid, what makes you think a 'black man' would even want you after you've mothered a baby for a white man for such a shallow reason? tsk.

Lol

benincitys:

yes is stupid if you dint want to marry one why want a baby from them , stupid women you better pass them when E born for white? abeg hang up with your black guy useless

wat r u tryin 2 say?
u r not clear enough
r u saying dat black guys r useless?

As a mother of 3 mixed raced kids I have to say that I dont understand u at all. What would u think of a white woman who would f**k a naija guy just to get a baby? Would that be ok for u?

A friend of mine used to come to see my kids when she didnt have any of her own yet, and she was always admiring my children and calling them "milk chocolate" and "choko babies". I thought it was just disgusting. She ended up having her own child with a foreign guy and even when she was pregnant she kept on talking about her "choko baby" etc. A baby is just a baby. My babies are not "chokolate" or "cafe latte" or anything like that, they are just kids like any other kids.

U should want to have a child with a man u love, regardless of his skin colour or other irrelevant characteristics. A child is not a trophy or a circus animal.

pamelaB:

As a mother of 3 mixed raced kids I have to say that I dont understand u at all. What would u think of a white woman who would f**k a naija guy just to get a baby? Would that be ok for u?

A friend of mine used to come to see my kids when she didnt have any of her own yet, and she was always admiring my children and calling them "milk chocolate" and "choko babies". I thought it was just disgusting. She ended up having her own child with a foreign guy and even when she was pregnant she kept on talking about her "choko baby" etc. A baby is just a baby. My babies are not "chokolate" or "cafe latte" or anything like that, they are just kids like any other kids.

U should want to have a child with a man u love, regardless of his skin colour or other irrelevant characteristics. A child is not a trophy or a circus animal.

No
she should want to have a child with a man she loves and [size=48pt]marries[/size]
love him,marry him,then have a child
that is the correct order
not this perversion of today where people lay down and have children like lower animals without a marital commitment
having a child by a man for his skin color is just another angle to the same perversion in today's society
They were once called illegitimate children
but now people celebrate such births like something good happened to them when they should be hiding in shame
we are indeed in the last days

And in that day seven women shall take hold of one man, saying, We will eat our own bread, and wear our own apparel: only let us be called by thy name, to take away our reproach" (Isaiah 4:1).

@$$osisi

R u from this century? Or even from this planet? I am just as PROUD of my kids whether they were born in or out of wedlock. A birth of a child IS something to celebrate. My first two kids were born be4 my husband and I got married. We got married when our 2nd was born, so our 3rd child is the only "legitimate" one. It is complitely normal in where I come from. People dont pay any attention to such things here.
All our kids were well planned, much wanted and long expected and have been very welcomed with both our families. They have loving and dedicated grandparents, aunts, uncles etc. who would do just about anything for them. U want me to be ashamed of that? Shame on u.

But the question still is, why wouldnt the poster marry a white man if she wants children with him? It is not easy to bring up a child alone, and with mixed kids it is even more difficult. All kinds of things can happen in a marriage and u can end up being alone with ur child anyway, but why intentionally create such a situation? Children are meant to be brought up in a family and by two parents. That is the ideal. Why do it the hard way if it is not necessary?

some women are making absolutely no sense in this thread.
poster NO, there is nothing wrong in wanting  a mixed race child without having the father around.
first lets us forget about the kid's color. white, black or green shouldnt make any difference. thats just a person's choice and nothing else if they want to have the kid with a white man .
the problem (to most of you guys) is that she desires a kid and nothing more.
why is that a problem? maybe this lady do not want the hassle of having another person sharing the love of that kid.
if she never want to get married or have a husband to dictate what she can or cant do, then this is the only way to do it.
who are we to judge what a person does or want for her own self? let her live her life the way she see fit.


MY concern in this picture is the kid. although there is no proof that single parenting is worst than the usual 2 parents upbringing, there is surely a lack from that kids point of view. we know that single mothers can do a great job but it doesnt mean that 2 parents are any worse. any child should have 2 parents if possible and no mothers should plan babies as a single parent (if the guy leaves, thats a different ball game)
what you probably should do is find a white guy that you might like and take it from there. you dont have to marry him (this is 2009) but let him be in that childs life so that the child can have an understanding of who he is and better chances for the future.

there is nothing wrong with wanting lighter kids with softer hair etc, just like someone who would prefer a boy rather than a girl, its called preferences.

so some people actually think like this? now I know the meaning of dumb

.