I need help with a lie I told that's about to back fire. I've been with my fiancee for a year now and at the start of our relationship I lied to him about being a virgin. He was a virgin so he thought that we were each other's first. The only reason I didn't tell him was
because I was ashamed about what he would think of me. I had a boyfriend before and he had pressured me into sleeping with him and it's something that I regret everyday. The guilt has been eating away at me and there has been times when he has asked about it and I lied each time. He recently found out the truth and is understandably devastated. Since he found out I lied about being a virgin, I am terrified about what is going to happen to us. He is the love of my life, proposed a few months back and we have always been talking about spending the rest of our lives together.

He wants to try and mend our relationship but he is unsure about the future. He doesn't know if we should break up and I don't know if he will ever be able to forgive me for telling him such a big lie, I am worried that even if he says he has forgiven me and we move on with the wedding plans and all, in the future, whenever I step on his toes, won't he remind me of the lie? I don't even know how to talk to him at this point. Even though he says he wants to try, he is kind of cold with me and I know he can't get over the fact that I lied to him about something so big and for so long, if he wasn't a virgin himself, I won't be this worried, but I made him think that we are both pure. I am so angry at myself for covering up this many times and I really don't want to lose him. Everyday I am just thinking is this our last day together? Is he going to want to break up with me today? I can't concentrate on anything, my sleeping pattern is all messed up, I can't focus on assignments which I need to do, the semester is running fast and I think my Continuous Assessment is going to be affected badly. I don't want to graduate, go for my youth service and return back home to start depending on my parents for toiletries and other needs or to go start dating all over again. My plan has been going on well for me before this lie was uncovered. I had planned my life to graduate, spend 1 year in Youth Service, get a job, get married and start making my babies already. What can I do to try and save my relationship? I want to cry and beg but I'm not the type that easily sheds tears, am a very rarely emotional lady. I am scared of losing him, There no more good men around and I think he is in the 1 or 2 percent honest Christians still in existence. I honestly can't see myself with anyone else and hate myself for lying. I can't stop thinking that even if he eventually does get over it, this is something that we would have to live with for the rest of our lives and I don't know if he can ever be truly happy or even trust me again. I can't help thinking that he would be better off with someone else who hasn't hurt him this bad but the thought of losing him is unbearable to me. I don't know what to do. I feel

Source: http://www.wivestownhallconnection.com/2016/03/i-lied-to-him-about-being-virgin-should.html

the truth is that you can't eat your cake and hate it back. why lie ? but the guy mumu o why didn't he check to know if its true from the beginning?

I will Divorce u

But why did u lie? Being a non virgin doesn't make u less human.

My dear begin use style dey find another fiance.cos the guy is definately planning to do u beta bad tin

pinkiberry:
the truth is that you can't eat your cake and hate it back. why lie ? but the guy mumu o why didn't he check to know if its true from the beginning?

Why are you calling a decent guy "a mumu". That is not the wise thing to say.

OYO is ur case

Reason why I breakup with my girl.tell him now if you dont want to waste your time.

He would breakup eventually!

Pls i beg you sir, madam, uncle, aunty, sister and brother i am 6 month pregnant with 6 bottles of cold beer for one joint near dust bin village for ajegunle now. i need some one to quote me with just one rude comment that will clear off the beer in me because am drunk i need to start going home pls.

Why lie?

Even if a lady is an ex slut if she opens up

She has more dignity dan a chronic lying virgin


I don value crios lies like dat

well if he leaves u

Never u lie any more

Loosing vital people in my life made me always saying the Truth till date

Learn nd save ur next relationship

Eyah, y u self go lie.

Stories that touch the heart and generate web traffic.

Topic closed. Thank you.

pinkiberry:
the truth is that you can't eat your cake and hate it back. why lie ? but the guy mumu o why didn't he check to know if its true from the beginning?

How was he supposed to check?

Hmmm...One thing that shud b avoided @all times is LIES of all sorts. Its left for him to decide if he can cope d unexpected shock. Ur case is a probability case. If u are lucky he may accept u back..

This is a lesson for "LIEing Mohammed" pikins.

Life goes on jo being a virgin or nt doesn't make a husbnd/wife and it doesn't make a marriage.


I c u'r desperate and confused give him som time jo. Cos it wll b difficult 4him 2forget& 4giv u

My dear, you're not the first to tell that lie. I think genetically girls/women are hardwired to tell that lie to the new guy who appears decent.

too much detail just because you dont want the story to be too short, probably you are paid per word.

lord have mercy.

akinsal:
Hmmm...One thing that shud b avoided @all times is LIES of all sorts.

hahahahahahaha, too funny.


op are you listening.

@Twinkie8

It is good you summoned the courage to eventually open up and tell him the truth. It must have been quite hard and I admire your courage. It shows that you have an honest girl - at least when it comes to people you love. You lied to him at the beginning of your relationship, when he was still a stranger, I guess, and you lied because you were ashamed.

The story shows that you value honesty - at the end of the day - and that you have values. If he truly loves you, he will look beyond the lie and see the beauty in you so consider this situation a valuable lesson that will tell you if you ae about to get married to the right man.

Whatever happens - it is a win win situation.

pinkiberry:
the truth is that you can't eat your cake and hate it back. why lie ? but the guy mumu o why didn't he check to know if its true from the beginning?

You're beautiful

Ptoocool:

You're beautiful

tnx

pinkiberry:
tnx

You wc,,sent you a mail right about now,,

[quote author=Twinkie8 post=44179830]

One can understand how you feel at the prospect of losing someone you really love.
But being a virgin himself, how did he find out you are not a virgin?

Opinions expectedly vary here, but here is what I think:
First, I find the practice of men asking a lady they are dating whether she is a virgin as dumb. For what?
O.K she is not a virgin so that nullifies all her beauty and brain, etc.
Second, virtually all men do sleep with or entertain the idea of sleeping with the women they are dating.

Every man should understand that the grown ravishing beauty he is beholding may have been in a relationship before...
That he is not the first person to know her.
Many ladies fall to the superior manipulative skills of men and slept with them...reluctantly.

It is not the virginity that should matter most...
It is the general attributes that make a wife material that count.

Now, here is what you should do:
Explain to this man the circumstances that led to your loss of your virginity.
Tell him you made a mistake in lying to him because you didn't want to lose him.

Keep an open mind that he may or may not forgive you...
But if he does and since it worries you, let him know you do not wish for him to bring it up the matter in the future.
It is understandable your loss of sleep, but you have to pull yourself together and concentrate in your studies.

I strongly believe that women should have their own "terms" in a relationship...
If he continues to play cold, tell him you are taking time off for both of you to reflect...
Good men no dey finish...First, you have to finish school.

The truth has many enemies, but no matter how far a lie fly, the Truth will surely overtake it.

pinkiberry:
the truth is that you can't eat your cake and hate it back. why lie ? but the guy mumu o why didn't he check to know if its true from the beginning?

And how will he do that?

aameyah:

And how will he do that?

by trying to do d thing.

I shall keep on tasting punnanies till the end of days..... So help me my John Thomas!!!!! Bottom line..... I'm nt a VIRGIN.

pinkiberry:
by trying to do d thing.

You are wicked ooo!

aameyah:


You are wicked ooo!

@pinkiberry...

You called a decent guy mumu?

Confirms your taste in men.

pinkiberry:
why lie ? but the guy mumu o why didn't he check to know if its true from the beginning?

Lol.. coming from a lady..


Dishonesty is a very big turn off for me...
The earlier young girls /ladies realize their
virginity won't make a man accept them truly,
the better..
A pity many ladies who use such lines av low
self esteem.. they think they are not as pretty
and attractive as their female counterpart..

To all ladies fond of lying about their virginity or
rape, it's best u stop and if you meet someone
you really love and vice versa, just come out
clean and don't pretend..With the right attitude,
you keep any man irrespective of what you have
experienced in the past.