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My Letter To The Singles - Romance - Nairaland

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My Letter To The Singles by firstlady86: 12:44am On Apr 16, 2016
The single phase is an amazing phase, the decision-making phase, the best time of your life to set things straight and right for your future.
You’re the boss here, unhindered and in full control. You’ll be making so many life decisions and it involves who you marry or not marry.
Now, whoever you marry, you’re equally marrying their family. That means you automatically become a daughter or son to your spouse’s family, and a new sibling to his/her siblings.

You may need to relax and ask: am I ready to be not just a spouse to my partner, but a son/daughter to their parents, and brother/sister to their siblings?

Most singles skip this part, with the euphoria of being engaged and getting married, then few weeks, months or years down the line, they start feeling suffocated by the presence of their spouse’s immediate family around them.

If there’s anything you do, during your dating and courtship, get close to your partner’s immediate family, and be your real self while at it. This is not about you pleasing or impressing them for acceptance, it’s about you getting to know them, and they getting to know you for the right purposes, and making necessary adjustments to accommodate each other.

One of the reasons most people fall out with their spouse’s immediate family members is very much connected to their inability to get to know them and connect properly during dating or courtship.
As you get to know your partner, please get to know their family: parents and siblings, if you both intend to take the relationship further. There’s no need playing hide and seek on your partner’s family.
This isn’t saying get overly familiar, but get close enough to know them, especially if you’re a sister. Connect with them, and feel free as though you’re with your own family, because that’s what marriage will make it.

Now, every member of your partner’s family won’t love you that much(you don’t love all your siblings equally, right?), but you need the love of their parents and some of their siblings. Know their favorite parent and also their less favorite siblings, because there will be some little sibling-feud you’ll be faced with someday. You should know that whichever parents loves them more will love you more, and be more jealous too with you in their lives, and that goes with their siblings as any sibling who has feud with your partner will likely transfer that feud to you.

As you observe these things, make mental notes, and solutions to dealing with them when the need arises without losing your sanity or peace of mind.

Some marriages are facing not spouse-issues, but issues of one’s spouse with their spouse’s family. It’s a very complicated situation when one’s spouse is at loggerhead with their spouse’s immediate family, the spouse is torn between the love of their life and their first love: family.

Some engagements have been called off because parents or siblings didn’t love or approve the choice of spouse presented to them, some divorced because of misunderstandings between their spouses and their immediate family, and this shouldn’t be so.
Understanding and wisdom should come into play, taking into cognizance that marriage brings two families as one.

Marriage is a journey worth embarking on, get onto it prepared in wisdom and you’ll find the needed strength to cross all hurdles that will come on the way.

Thanks for reading. Share your thoughts, comments and suggestions.

Follow us on firstladyibiene.com for more on relationships and love

http://firstladyibiene.com/firstlady-ibienes-diary-my-letter-to-the-singles/?preview=true
Re: My Letter To The Singles by halfricanadian(f): 12:46am On Apr 16, 2016
Nice write up strong words

1 Like

Re: My Letter To The Singles by talktonase(m): 1:27am On Apr 16, 2016
marriage no be beans! It is meant for people that are ready to grow.

1 Like

Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 1:34am On Apr 16, 2016
This girl is making sense lol.

1 Like

Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 1:34am On Apr 16, 2016
smiley...ok
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 4:05am On Apr 16, 2016
A life contract and school someone can never graduate from.
Nice lines.
We gats to prepare b4 finally saying that 'I do'

1 Like

Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 8:41am On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
A life contract and school someone can never graduate from.
Nice lines.
We gats to prepare b4 finally saying that 'I do'

are you preparing already?
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 9:01am On Apr 16, 2016
vizkiz:


are you preparing already?
my mama has been preparing since d day I was born nigga.
Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 9:11am On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
my mama has been preparing since d day I was born nigga.

calm down sheila, no need to bite undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 9:23am On Apr 16, 2016
vizkiz:


calm down sheila, no need to bite undecided
Do I sound as if I wan bite undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 10:08am On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
Do I sound as if I wan bite undecided

yeah you do. I could feel your vampire teeth fangs on my neck already undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 11:07am On Apr 16, 2016
vizkiz:


yeah you do. I could feel your vampire teeth fangs on my neck already undecided
u shld not be alive by now undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by yuiop(m): 11:19am On Apr 16, 2016
halfricanadian:
Nice write up strong words
Razor mouth. How far?
Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 11:30am On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
u shld not be alive by now undecided

so you admire to being a vampire? undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 11:34am On Apr 16, 2016
vizkiz:


so you admire to being a vampire? undecided
yes undecided
So I can actually Suck ur blood undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 11:40am On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
yes undecided
So I can actually Suck ur blood undecided

why me? Why not mrcork your lover? undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by MrCork: 11:47am On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
yes undecided
So I can actually Suck ur blood undecided


..baby...pulissssssss forget that young man Vizkiz & suck me instead....MOI READY!! cheesy
Re: My Letter To The Singles by firstlady86: 12:05pm On Apr 16, 2016
Thanks Nairalanders, follow my blog for more on Relationships, www.firstladyibiene.com

Thanks
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 12:15pm On Apr 16, 2016
MrCork:



..baby...pulissssssss forget that young man Vizkiz & suck me instead....MOI READY!! cheesy
are u still sick undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 12:17pm On Apr 16, 2016
vizkiz:


why me? Why not mrcork your lover? undecided
cork ko, coca-cola ni undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by MrCork: 12:18pm On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
cork ko, coca-cola ni undecided

angry
Re: My Letter To The Singles by ebubey(f): 12:18pm On Apr 16, 2016
f
Re: My Letter To The Singles by MrCork: 12:18pm On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
cork ko, coca-cola ni undecided


HateU2 <<<<<lessssbiaaaan!! angry
Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 12:28pm On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
cork ko, coca-cola ni undecided
you know he likes you right?
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 1:17pm On Apr 16, 2016
MrCork:



HateU2 <<<<<lessssbiaaaan!! angry
Mrcork, gayyyyyyy
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 1:18pm On Apr 16, 2016
vizkiz:


you know he likes you right?

I reject it undecided
Re: My Letter To The Singles by vizkiz: 1:24pm On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
I reject it undecided
grin
Re: My Letter To The Singles by MrCork: 3:12pm On Apr 16, 2016
HateU2:
Mrcork, gayyyyyyy



....correeection..I have sleep wit 17 females on nairaland......how many u sleep wit? ..I REST MY CASE!! (goat) undecidedso far
Re: My Letter To The Singles by Nobody: 3:38pm On Apr 16, 2016
MrCork:




....correeection..I have sleep wit 17 females on nairaland......how many u sleep wit? ..I REST MY CASE!! (goat) undecidedso far
undecided

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