When I decided to write about divorce in Nigeria, people around me discouraged me saying it wasn’t a topic worth talking about and it is seen as a taboo in most African cultures to encourage divorce. While I agree with these people, I also think divorce should never be seen as a taboo, if not a marriage becomes a universal prison rather than universal Institution.

What is Divorce?

Divorce can be defined as a legal dissolution of a union by law or any reasonable body. What this implies is that not all marriage dissolutions should be seen as a taboo.
When is it ok to file for a divorce?
Divorce should not be an excuse for a man or woman to connect with an old or new lovers, but a decision they reach when a marriage has been damaged to an irretrievable point.

Reasons to Justify divorce:

1. No sex-
When a spouse denies the other partner of sex without a good justification, sex is an important part of a union; Sex should be practiced (enjoyed) in a union often, but when couples living in the same home stay for years without having intimacies then a divorce is justified.

2. Abandonment (must be over a year before filing for a divorce)-
If a spouse abandons his/her partner or family for over a year without a good reason as agreed by both partners, the divorce is justified.

3. Adultery-
Adultery in this case includes a large extent unfaithfulness, when a partner engages in sexual practice outside his/her marriage, without consent from partner, then divorce is justified.

4. Rape-
Forcefully having intimacy with partner or parties outside one's marriage can be described as rape and when such acts are practiced by married people, divorce is justified.

5. Separation (over 2years of separation)-
When married partners have been in separation for over 2years due to misunderstanding, divorce is justified.

6. Violence between spouses-
When a spouse experiences violence is marital union, then divorce is justified.

7. Death-
When one's spouse dies, then it is justified when he/she intends to start a new relationship, after traditional rites of late spouse have been concluded.

Reasons for increasing rate of divorce in Nigeria:

1. Poverty-
Marriage needs some level of financial stability to be sustainable, hence when people with little or no source of income go into marriage it becomes very difficult to sustain such a union.

2. Lack of love-
Most couples go into marriage with very little knowledge about marriage, it’s advisable that before couples reach the conclusion of marriage, they should spend months or years getting to know each other to study both positive and negative sides of their partners.

3. Desperation-
This is peculiar to women, most women rush into marriage at young age; while the older single women become desperate to avoid being stigmatized. Hence, they rush into whatever man is available for marriage without spending time to get to know the man.

4. Illiteracy-
If marriage is an institution the there is need for sensitization around marriage, a lot of women due to illiteracy lack the exposure and ability to keep a man; and their men leave the marriage with an excuse of lack of value.

Matrimonial Causes Act
Chapter 220, section 15 & 16
Laws of the Federation of Nigeria 1990

Divorce in Northern Nigeria

Divorce in northern Nigeria is a said to be one of the highest rate of divorce in West Africa, according to research, one of every three marriages in northern Nigeria fail with the first three years.

In 2009, 45,000 women (divorcees) in Kano under the umbrella of Voice of Widows, Orphans and Divorcees Association of Nigeria (VOWODAN) came together to stage a 0ne-million man march against the high rate of divorce in the state; this made the Government of Kano aware of the menace that divorce causes to the marital policy of the state.

While there is a high rate of divorce in northern Nigeria, men and women in the south are being subjected to even worse experiences than divorce, they witness all sorts of atrocities in their marriages but are afraid of filing for divorce because they think of it as a taboo.
In summary, divorce should not be seen as a taboo or an excuse, it should be seen as the best decision when the damages in a marital union becomes irretrievable.

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Article Credit: All Music Law, Vanguard Nigeria, Aljazeera English, Nigeria Village Square