For sometime now, the thoughts of just have kid(s) while the girl go her way has been on my mind--not fully in effect yet but it keeps coming to mind.

In the current state of events in this country, the average Nigerian equates possessions to mean you are successful. It is the yardstick people use to determine whether to date you or not.

Looking at my own life and things I have experienced with Nigerians girls, I do not think getting married after all will bring me happiness anymore. I had a girl left and for more than 3 years I was on her neck trying to resolve issues but she never really gave me a chance, nor did she want to have a meeting with me, no matter how much i requested for it. This went on until I revealed some changes about my personal life which was different from what she knew -- of course it is financially inclined. The story has changed after that day.

At that point of discovery, every feelings I had for her died. Similar occurrences have taken place and I began to question the existence of people on earth where love is hinge on possessions. I mean can't you just love someone unconditionally because you know that they truly love you? How about getting to really know them, everything you can, before you judge? Is there anything wrong if you start from somewhere with a guy whom you know is very determined?

Yeah, all those no longer count in today's Nigeria.

Would I be wrong to just have kids and let the girl go? I mean being a single dad isn't a bad idea is it?

I would always have that feeling that I am loved because of what I have. My experience in life has resulted to this and my sister was shocked the day I told her about my plan. She begged me not to try it but I am afraid it might just happen. She has always known me to be the cool headed, focus, loving person. I had gone on to spend my last dime for my siblings with zero left in account.

Since most Nigerian girls now make it seem like it's business, I think we should start signing contracts IMO. Don't get me wrong, I am the most loving and romantic person you find in movies, but sadly, I tend to hide that part of me due to events of Nigerian life. Like said, I will always feel she won't be with me if I had nothing.

No Money, No Love...

Mr op,,, it seemz yu just read my diary..because i once thought about doing this samething..
Virtually 90% naija dudes have experienced what you have just posted..and as for me personally i understand very well wah yu feeling...
But the choice depends on wha yu want... But my advice is,, you will have to get married no matter what.. Having a child withoout her mother close by is just a time bomb and not advice able at all... But definitely not with the lady you kave just described... It only shows she doesnt love you,, she started giving u audience when she knows things has started changing financially... An eye opener for yu bruhh... Look for another gurl that accept yu for who yu were b4 yu start making it...

#Mypiece...

hummerwise:
Mr op,,, it seemz yu just read my diary..because i once thought about doing this samething..
Virtually 90% naija dudes have experienced what you have just posted..and as for me personally i understand very well wah yu feeling...
But the choice depends on wha yu want... But my advice is,, you will have to get married no matter what.. Having a child withoout her mother close by is just a time bomb and not advice able at all... But definitely not with the lady you kave just described... It only shows she doesnt love you,, she started giving u audience when she knows things has started changing financially... An eye opener for yu bruhh... Look for another gurl that accept yu for who yu were b4 yu start making it...

#Mypiece...

Bro, I understand. Do I have to start living a life of showing off just because I want to be accepted?

Forget what anyone tell you. No girl in current day Nigeria will EVER think about giving an audience if you look like you have nothing.

It"s cold hard, bitter pill of reality!

D mata get hw e Tay dey my broda. But no mata wat, I don't tink it is advisable for u to have kids n let d girl go. No! C'mon wat about the kids dat u got, denying them of Motherly love. By doin dis, u are telling ur kids to also do the same wen they grow up, thereby laying a bad foundation. Be dat as it may, I still believe u haven't find dat special person dat will b ready to b with u no mata what. I strongly believe we still have Decent Girls here in Nigeria, it is just for us to pray dat God shud direct them to us..

All this single parenting affects children psychologically.

Work on urself and you will end up with ur like.

Benita27:
All this single parenting affects children psychologically.

Work on urself and you will end up with ur like.

what do you mean when you say I should work on myself?

Daniel2289:
D mata get hw e Tay dey my broda. But no mata wat, I don't tink it is advisable for u to have kids n let d girl go. No! C'mon wat about the kids dat u got, denying them of Motherly love. By doin dis, u are telling ur kids to also do the same wen they grow up, thereby laying a bad foundation. Be dat as it may, I still believe u haven't find dat special person dat will b ready to b with u no mata what. I strongly believe we still have Decent Girls here in Nigeria, it is just for us to pray dat God shud direct them to us..

Bro, the issue is being accepted because of possession.

Would I be fair to say love does not exist?

groomed:
what do you mean when you say I should work on myself?

You sound like one of these guys with a wrong mindset abt women.

Change ur ideology abt women, and don't treat every woman that comes ur way like they're after the money.

Is it that you don't even have, and is scared of responsibilities?.

groomed:
Bro, the issue is being accepted because of possession.

Would I be fair to say love does not exist?

Love do exist, but to FEW.

Benita27:
You sound like one of these guys with a wrong mindset abt women.

Change ur ideology abt women, and don't treat every woman that comes ur way like they're after the money.

Is it that you don't even have, and is scared of responsibilities?.

read my post again and you will get my point. It is wrong to cast the blames on me when realities on ground oppose your views.

Did you read what I said about the girl in the OP? So how is that I have wrong mindset about women or they created it?

I will urge you to read my OP to get my point.

Daniel2289:


Love do exist, but to FEW.

it exist based on CONDITIONS!

groomed:
it exist based on CONDITIONS!

Partially Yes!!!.

groomed:
read my post again and you will get my point. It is wrong to cast the blames on me when realities on ground oppose your views.

Did you read what I said about the girl in the OP? So how is that I have wrong mindset about women or they created it?

I will urge you to read my OP to get my point.

Op!, dis ur post is for lazy and selfish fellows.

Love is no longer blind, as a matter of fact it has a wiper currently.

Who wants a baggage?, It's nt unconditional, even you that wants to marry or date a girl have principles she must meet.

Op come and be my baby daddy.

At your own risk bro!Living as a single father will even make you raise children like the ladies you are avoiding now

i wept profusely when i saw how long this epistle is but op i advice you that whatever you're feeling just follow your heart, follow what your conscience tells you is right.

My guy, love truly exists but it is not common. The reality is that love has graduated from pry, high school and university. It has received sight, no longer blind, halleluyah. Guys and ladies have expectations, needs, desires and futuristic imaginations and plans. Just be diligent and hopeful, with some measure of self development, and love will find you

Luckymay:
Op come and be my baby daddy.

I LOVE ur dp.

Benita27:
Op!, dis ur post is for lazy and selfish fellows.

Love is no longer blind, as a matter of fact it has a wiper currently.

Who wants a baggage?, It's nt unconditional, even you that wants to marry or date a girl have principles she must meet.

So you agree we are running a contract venture and nothing like love exist?

groomed:


So you agree we are running a contract venture and nothing like love exist?

You shld have just asked if love exist.

It does exist, but it has eyes now.

You dig?.

Benita27:
You shld have just asked if love exist.

It does exist, but it has eyes now.

You dig?.

it doesn't as long as we tie it to certain to some material things.

It's a business-- relationship now is a business.

Did u grow up with both parents? If yes how did it mk u feel coming home to a warm embrace? If no den am sorry abt dat That being said u shud identify wat it is really dat had brought u to dis point wit ur thoughts n see if u can change it or better still change ur search mode n places of search and while doing dis it is important u talk to God,I assure u he listens. Quote me every child deserves both parents 1 to direction on d right path d oda for love an affection,its tru u can still hv dem even wen separated but at some point distance takes a toll on everything.

groomed:
it doesn't as long as we tie it to certain to some material things.

It's a business-- relationship now is a business.

why do i have dis feelings that you're scared of responsibilities.

Marriage is wey more business than a mere relationship o!.

there are still some good girls around... they ain't perfect, but they give u cause not 2 doubt their love.. don't Mk assumptions, open and free ur Heart, and love will locate u.. keep on doing what's right! ur actions will b vindicated if u still keep on meeting d wrong 1s..

Benita27:
why do i have dis feelings that you're scared of responsibilities.

Marriage is wey more business than a mere relationship o!.

I am not scared. if I were, why would even harbour the thoughts of having a kid? Or is that not a responsibility?

Florblu:
At your own risk bro!Living as a single father will even make you raise children like the ladies you are avoiding now

Wrong! Ben Carson, who is a world renowned surgeon, one who separated the Binder twins, joined in the head and it 1987, was raised by a single mother. How is that for your proposed ideology?

dauntless15:
i wept profusely when i saw how long this epistle is but op i advice you that whatever you're feeling just follow your heart, follow what your conscience tells you is right.

why weep bro? Is the content or the length that made you weep?

playing tekno-pana

groomed:
why weep bro? Is the content or the length that made you weep?

the lenght

dauntless15:
the lenght

lol. It depends on what your viewing it with. It's not too lengthy but I understand your sentiments.

groomed:
lol. It depends on what your viewing it with. It's not too lengthy but I understand your sentiments.

thank you but heed my honest advice though

groomed:
For sometime now, the thoughts of just have kid(s) while the girl go her way has been on my mind--not fully in effect yet but it keeps coming to mind.

In the current state of events in this country, the average Nigerian equates possessions to mean you are successful. It is the yardstick people use to determine whether to date you or not.

Looking at my own life and things I have experienced with Nigerians girls, I do not think getting married after all will bring me happiness anymore. I had a girl left and for more than 3 years I was on her neck trying to resolve issues but she never really gave me a chance, nor did she want to have a meeting with me, no matter how much i requested for it. This went on until I revealed some changes about my personal life which was different from what she knew -- of course it is financially inclined. The story has changed after that day.

At that point of discovery, every feelings I had for her died. Similar occurrences have taken place and I began to question the existence of people on earth where love is hinge on possessions. I mean can't you just love someone unconditionally because you know that they truly love you? How about getting to really know them, everything you can, before you judge? Is there anything wrong if you start from somewhere with a guy whom you know is very determined?

Yeah, all those no longer count in today's Nigeria.

Would I be wrong to just have kids and let the girl go? I mean being a single dad isn't a bad idea is it?

I would always have that feeling that I am loved because of what I have. My experience in life has resulted to this and my sister was shocked the day I told her about my plan. She begged me not to try it but I am afraid it might just happen. She has always known me to be the cool headed, focus, loving person. I had gone on to spend my last dime for my siblings with zero left in account.

Since most Nigerian girls now make it seem like it's business, I think we should start signing contracts IMO. Don't get me wrong, I am the most loving and romantic person you find in movies, but sadly, I tend to hide that part of me due to events of Nigerian life. Like said, I will always feel she won't be with me if I had nothing.

No Money, No Love...

If not that i knw GOD, understand the bible, i would 've bought this your idea...but you knw, as a christian we must all be judged and give account of the tallents and gift God has giving us, in so, getting to marry a woman or impregnating a lady saved for the sake having children is one big sin before God...and moreover, there's this aspect of a child's life that will crave and yearn for the mother which you as a man can't fill...you need to marry and cliff to your wife according to the book of genesis