Explosion Rocks Isoko Development Secretariat In Delta
With Auntie Agatha

Dear Agatha,

I’m a man of 29 years of age. I met my wife, who is still a student, during one of my regular visits to her daddy’s. She visited me for a few weeks and the following month, she came with the story of her missing period. As at then, I didn’t have any reason to doubt her. So we started marriage preparations and got married.

However, I recently chanced on something she used before which implicated her of still being in a relationship after we started dating with a man she earlier told me she wasn’t dating any more when I first went to visit her at her hostel at the time we just started.

I confronted her immediately, pretending I had a spy in her hostel who told me about the over night visit of her ex around the time we became intimate.

Thinking I actually had someone spying on her, made her to admit to the truth, but, insisted it happened a month before she slept with me.

She has put to bed. Though the baby takes after her in look, I’m planning to trick her into taking the baby for a paternity test to make sure the boy is my mine. I want her to follow me abroad during my regular visit to put to rest my suspicions and anxiety over the true paternity of the child. Please advise me on what to do if I confirm that the baby is not mine.

Suspicious Father.


Dear Suspicious Father,
You are part of the problem you are trying to solve. The reason is: If you didn’t sleep with her within few weeks of meeting her, you won’t be subjecting yourself to these bouts of doubts over the paternity of the child.

If you didn’t demand for moral values when you first met her, why are you now questing for it with the paternity of the innocent child?
Don’t forget, he who comes to equity must come with clean hands. If you could sleep with her few days of your meeting her, why do you think another man too cannot do the same?

What investigations did you conduct into her behavior before going the whole way with her? Did you bother to find out the kind of woman you were getting entangled with? What plans did you have in mind when you first met her?

There is a lot more than just sex in every relationship. If you had given yourselves time and space to discover each other’s weaknesses, strengths, social and moral values, you won’t have this vexing and delicate challenge so early in the marriage. Unfortunately, your inability to fine-tune your desires is going to be shouldered by an innocent child, who didn’t have anything to do with your decisions to date, have sex and marry his mother.

Besides, either way the result goes, your marriage may not survive it because if it turns out that the child is really yours, your wife may not be able to forget and forgive the humiliation the test put her through as a woman. It can be very painful to a woman to discover that the man she thinks she knows doesn’t trust her at all.

By all means, it is your right to find out whose baby you have under your roof, especially as you are suspicious of the child’s paternity. But, it would do your marriage a world of good if you prepare the woman involved in all these.

There is no way she won’t find out the purpose of the visit at the end of the day. If she knows how you feel about the piece of evidence you saw and the damage it has done in the area of trust so early in the marriage, you might not need to go all the way abroad to find out whose baby the child really is.

She might opt to tell you the truth instead of allowing others witness her disgrace at the hospital where you intend to have the test done.
Often than not, a well intentioned dialogue within a relationship/marriage achieves more than force or deceit, which is what you are about to do by tricking her to follow you for paternity test of the baby, without giving her the opportunity of admitting to the truth. If you are thinking beyond this issue of the paternity of this child, you must find ways of solving this issue within the two of you.

This is because if the child turns out to be yours, the wound of what you are about to do will remain fresh forever, as your wife can use this piece of information against you whenever you step out of line. This is because there is always a special bond between sons and their mothers, which a woman can use to either make or mar her husband.

Being your first son and child, you need from this nascent stage, start a foundation of friendship, trust and responsibility between the two of you. This can only happen if you handle this matter with utmost caution and wisdom.
Don’t do anything that will be difficult to erase for life. Give her the benefit of admitting the truth to you. And if she insists that the child is yours at that point, trust her and allow peace to reign in your home.

However, if the child turns out not to be yours; don’t give in too much to pains of disappointment by making a big show out of it. Quietly as possible, ease her out of your life by telling her to return the baby to its biological father, because that child has a right to the love and support of the father.
The decision of what to do with the marriage becomes your choice from that point.
Before you do this, why not pray about it as every child comes with a blessing from God.

Good luck.



More: http://newsherald.com.ng/2016/08/doubt-child-mine/

Hmmm

na una sabi oh

For this govt every negative thin is possible

Story

But where is lalasticlala sef?

Day don break oh

dis thread is potentious................*gbagaun*

this is super story