This is a simple tutorial with steps on how to fart (messs) in public and get away with it.

N:B it is written in pidgin for easy comprehension.

step 1;
As the messs just caash you, jejely survey the area first with your eyes. Especially if Na inside church, mosque, bank, bus. . . . Suffer say people plenty.

Step 2;
Act as a gentleman man or cute lass.
No smile o. . . Just dey neutral.

Step 3;
If the people around you dey discuss join am but if not just feel free. Press phone or do something to keep you busy.

Step 4;
Now sit tight. . . You fit cross your leg if you be girl. (For easy releasing of the nuclear bomb).

Step 5;
Now raise one part of your yansh slow and steady like tortoise. Then release am small first to know if Na messs wey go make noise. (Still dey form busy o.)

Step 6;
if Na the type wey dey make noise suppress am small by pressing your abdominal muscles.

Step 7;
Now allow the fart go out with total freedom, make e circulate wella. (Keep acting busy. Afterall nothing concern you.)

Step 8;
When people begin make comments like
"hmmmm, fuuun, who messs?"
"Some people wicked o. ."
"Na wa ooo, for this heat."

Just say..
"Haaa e never smell reach my side, but who be that kind wicked person naa".

Step 9;
As plenty people dun perceive am, you self join the crowd dey complain on how bad the messs dey smell.

Step 10;
But if nobody complain. U self keep quiet , form busy like lalasticlala and focus. No time for dulling.

written by: aporoko


http://aporoko..com/2017/04/how-to-fart-messs-in-public-and-get.html

Lalasticlala please delete this thread for me.

ERUDITEE:
Lalasticlala please delete this thread for me.

Any good reason for why Lala should delete it?

tosyne2much:
Any good reason for why Lala should delete it?

isn't it FP worthy?

ERUDITEE:


isn't it FP worthy?

I don't think so bro

ERUDITEE:
This is a simple tutorial with steps on how to fart (messs) in public and get away with it.

N:B it is written in pidgin for easy comprehension.

step 1;
As the messs just caash you, jejely survey the area first with your eyes. Especially if Na inside church, mosque, bank, bus. . . . Suffer say people plenty.

Step 2;
Act as a gentleman man or cute lass.
No smile o. . . Just dey neutral.

Step 3;
If the people around you dey discuss join am but if not just feel free. Press phone or do something to keep you busy.

Step 4;
Now sit tight. . . You fit cross your leg if you be girl. (For easy releasing of the nuclear bomb).

Step 5;
Now raise one part of your yansh slow and steady like tortoise. Then release am small first to know if Na messs wey go make noise. (Still dey form busy o.)

Step 6;
if Na the type wey dey make noise suppress am small by pressing your abdominal muscles.

Step 7;
Now allow the fart go out with total freedom, make e circulate wella. (Keep acting busy. Afterall nothing concern you.)

Step 8;
When people begin make comments like
"hmmmm, fuuun, who messs?"
"Some people wicked o. ."
"Na wa ooo, for this heat."

Just say..
"Haaa e never smell reach my side, but who be that kind wicked person naa".

Step 9;
As plenty people dun perceive am, you self join the crowd dey complain on how bad the messs dey smell.

Step 10;
But if nobody complain. U self keep quiet , form busy like lalasticlala and focus. No time for dulling.

written by: ERUDITEE

you be expert o

Chaii you are experienced in this field!!! I believe you have never been caught releasing chemical weapon into the atmosphere.

tinutunde:
you be expert o

LOL. I don't even know how to fart how much more being an expert.