Question: I have been dating this guy for awhile. He blames me for his
faults! How do I get past what the heart wants? He has not been
financially stable. I have been helping out. I stopped helping out
as much cuz he would not work. Every time I went to visit him
I ended up paying out money for something. So I stopped
going over even less hoping he would get the picture and work.
He has no car. He keeps pushing for me to let him move in my
home with me. I have not allowed it. I feel if he can not support
and maintain his home how is going to be positive partner for
mine? He finally was not able to cover his rent and to move in
with his mother. He blames me for not coming over more and
helping out more. I push him to be more than he is now. It just
takes effort. It bothers me that he is very content living with his
mother at the age of 37. His mother blames me. She feels I
should of let him move in already. I say he needs to be
financially stable first they say I am crazy and I dont love him.

Answer: Answer: If he isn’t changing, then you should change the relationship by refusing to put up with it anymore. Since you say that you’ve been with him for awhile, I would guess that it’s been like this for a long time and he’s not showing signs of improving the situation himself. If you can’t convince him or his family, then don’t put yourself through anymore unnecessary pain. It’ll be hard, but you have all the right reasons to break up and move on.
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www.http://baeboo.forumotion.com/t3-he-blames-me-for-his-errors#4

Drop your views

My guy see nonsense abeg!

Askance:
Drop your views

Which views??, ofcourse some people will view and pass but as a righteous person i am i can't just view and pass without giving a helping hand..Ok, that's btw...the things is, he is plain lazy and i think the hand writing is glaringly written on the wall but on issues like this it's good we hear both sides of the story cos i'm sure if we were to hear the guy's own side of the story you might not be this innocent after all, but if what you posted there is anything to go by, then i 'll say give him an altimatum to get himself busy with something, don't just jump into breaking up with him...if the days/weeks and perhaps months of the altimatum you gave him elapsed and he's still aloof of himself, then pack your load and board the nearest cab and never look back.

Askance:
Drop your views

Where did you see that liability of a baby you call boyfriend. Anyone that cannot take responsibility for his life and blames others for his/her (mis)fortunes is a pest and a toxic individual.
Which self respecting man will want to go live in his girlfriend's house in the first place. There is virtue in assisting someone struggling (and they must show effort at trying to improve their situation) but it is a PRIVILEGE not a RIGHT. That 'baby' cannot take care of you or run his household successfully

Yeah

First of all, don't marry out of pity.

If he is not taking responsibility for his situation, if he doesn't want to work, if he can not diagnose his problems, how will he provide leadership for the family? Small time this guy will say you "are using his star or destiny". Please quit the relationship when it still makes sense.

He is a liability, a parasite and he is toxic. He also doesn't have a family with strong morals otherwise he wouldn't be thinking of moving in with you.

He blames you for not doing enough to help out today but I assure you that he will come round to accuse you of spiritually manipulating his fortunes to work for yourself.

Finally, please don't marry out of pity.

AndyMolarAllwel:
Na Wa o o, even his family is blaming you for his misfortunes..... You better run for ur dear life. Thats all I can say, wise up pls, the LAZINESS is heriditory, its planted in their family.

hereditary? Lol

37 years?
My sister,please run for your life

Azeequeen:
37 years?

My sister,please run for your life

37 and practically useless

What's he doing with his mother @37?.

I am using this medium to invite relationship everyone to our dating and relationship forum: http://baeboo.forumotion.com

Benita27:
37 and practically useless

What's he doing with his mother @37?.

The thing tire me ooo...When his mates are building houses and already have a family

I think the family stupidity is Peak,It's in them

Azeequeen:

The thing tire me ooo...When his mates are building houses and already have a family

I think the family stupidity is Peak,It's in them

The girl dating his sorry ass is more stupid.

my sister u beta leav him nd come 2 me altough am not yet ready

his an APC member

Askance:
hereditary? Lol

I bet it, sit down & trace analise this family, u will see reason in dat assertion.

Beside its u am even blaming, men dnt marry lazy women this dayz talkless of a woman managing a lazy man. When u start giving birth, who will feed u & ur kids? U think u alone can do it?
I laff in sakwoto....kwantinu

No insults pls

Benita27:
The girl dating his sorry ass is more stupid.