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I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Help..i Feel My Husband Doesn't Love Me Anymore / Marriage List Given To Man By His Father-In-law / My Father-in-law Is Making My Wife To Disrespect Me! (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by vislabraye(m): 4:56am On Mar 25, 2017
realmey:


*Not a polygamist

*Less busy

*In his 70's

*Far bt not too far

N.B:His wife is wt him nd his children are always wt him

How was his tone when he asked you to visit ? Did he sound bossy or domineering ? Your conclusion might be wrong.
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by mannycrown: 5:22am On Mar 25, 2017
@realmey what your father inlaw said is not out of place when there's a cordial father inlaw son inlaw relationship. All i see is an old man who loves you and the way you're marrying his daughter!
Mine travels a lot but whenever he calls, always for a neccessary reason, he always complains about same thing -that i dont call / visit but each time i always assure him its always on my mind but procrastination, cos i neither call nor visit except when necessary.
So be yourself bro, do as you fit do and don't take his wishes personal, he's not trying to control you. He just loves you!
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by talisman35(m): 5:40am On Mar 25, 2017
You father in law is your family,why do have believe he want to control you,asking for money or what ,he is more or less your father no matter what happen you better erase that thought in your mind,be close to him,i don't know this your in-law but you will gain alot .You need him more than he needs you.
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by TellMeTheTruth(m): 6:31am On Mar 25, 2017
Ioannes:


And you're absolutely sure he's not a gay man who fancies you? undecided

Don't rule out that possibility.

Are you for real? angry
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by adecares(f): 7:11am On Mar 25, 2017
Your father-in-law is not as rich as Dangote that's why you don't want to be close to him.
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Snowpikin: 7:11am On Mar 25, 2017
Na wa oo
Thats why i hate african marriages..
Oyibo inlaws no get time for all that rubbish..

Infact an oyibo mother or father inlaw would like to call u before they visit u.
They dnt give orders as to how ur home should be run.

They give u space to enjoy ur marriage.

They dnt pressure u into doing anythin for them.

But once u marry a black person u don marry d whole family wahala
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nweike1: 7:28am On Mar 25, 2017
You are 100% right. He is trying to control you. Do you visit your own father every week?
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by KardinalZik(m): 7:29am On Mar 25, 2017
I will comment when you make the question clearer.

I still wanna know the "certain conversation" you had with him. Opinions must not be totally far away from that certain conversation
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Tonero231: 7:29am On Mar 25, 2017
[quote author=realmey post=54388633]Hello NL

I visited my father-in-law sometime in January this year
We had certain conversation that included him asking me to visit him either on a weekly or monthly basis

Hmmmm,it didn't go down well with me,though i said nothing so it does not look as if i'm disrespectful.

I made up my mind it was not going to be possible as ordinarily i felt he was trying to control me;i didn't bother visiting in February as i already decided to visit at my convenience.

I really don't know if i am wrong,pls ur sincere advice

I think he only wants to be close to you
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nweike1: 7:43am On Mar 25, 2017
Richy4:


I might be wrong though....But all I see is love that a father in law has towards his son in law....It oozes from him that he does not have a way to control it...There are people that doesn't have a son and Father in law relationship..in fact some father in laws cannot stand their son inlaws..except if the son in law was richer....But in your own case the love he has for you was a burden for u.. I believe you are a good guy that's why he loves your presence and companionship.....

I guess he doesn't have much kids that could be a reason why he was looking for an additional....Please give him a call as often as you can and visit as often as you can...I have learned that people die easily this days....happiness can prolong lifespan and it could be the joy of seeing you and his daughter in unity and coming to see him that might increase his life....Think about it bro... Ten mins inconvenience phone call twice a week from you and a visitation ones in a fortnight is not too much to save a life or is it?.....
How often does he visit his own mother?
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by femi4: 7:48am On Mar 25, 2017
realmey:
Hello NL

I visited my father-in-law sometime in January this year
We had certain conversation that included him asking me to visit him either on a weekly or monthly basis

Hmmmm,it didn't go down well with me,though i said nothing so it does not look as if i'm disrespectful.

I made up my mind it was not going to be possible as ordinarily i felt he was trying to control me;i didn't bother visiting in February as i already decided to visit at my convenience.

I really don't know if i am wrong,pls ur sincere advice

You are correct..... Visit him monthly for what?

Abeg don't be too close to your in laws else you ll loose your dignity and respect.

You are a man, he should allow you to be responsible for your decision

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Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by mjbaba: 7:50am On Mar 25, 2017
Let me just tell u something. When u marry someone's child, a typical african parent sees
U as if u have also become his/her own child. Demanding to see u, even giving u a monthly option is very fair to me. He probably likes, enjoys conversing with u and wants to see more of u for that reason, not that he wants to control u or somethin
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by delishpot: 8:06am On Mar 25, 2017
Eddygourdo:
Is ur father inlaw on the down low ? Why will hhe want to see u like dat.

If your mom is that attatched to your wife, would you think her a lesbian?
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Eddygourdo(m): 8:08am On Mar 25, 2017
delishpot:


If your mom is that attatched to your wife, would you think her a lesbian?
@ "attached" meaning its mutual. Thus how andd why should I think she lesbian. there is no "mutual" in this case and men aren't the "attached" thingy. We don't do that nor expect such. Do u get now ?
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by delishpot: 8:12am On Mar 25, 2017
Eddygourdo:
@ "attached" meaning its mutual. Thus how andd why should I think she lesbian. there is no "mutual" in this case and men aren't the "attached" thingy. We don't do that nor expect such. Do u get now ?

I dont get now. I will ask again, I did not say your wife and mom get attatched to each other, I said if your mom gets attatched to your wife who doesnt feel the same way, will you consider your mom a lesbian for wanting your wife to visit her more just like the rest of your sibbling?
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by abbeyty(m): 8:37am On Mar 25, 2017
realmey:


Just so he can see me often

this is serious
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Eddygourdo(m): 8:38am On Mar 25, 2017
delishpot:


I dont get now. I will ask again, I did not say your wife and mom get attatched to each other, I said if your mom gets attatched to your wife who doesnt feel the same way, will you consider your mom a lesbian for wanting your wife to visit her more just like the rest of your sibbling?
women are emotional beings nd are known to naturally express feelings to each other without lesbian things being a factor. Of course tht won't go through my mind becaause there could be many things that might demand such closeness eg helping out with things etc but same cnt be said of a father in law and son inlaw. Haba what could he possibly help him with nor discuss weekly that should warrant such friendship. We men aren't emotional like that nor do we expect it. Eg if a man hugs me for too long I get uncomfortable and withdraw not cos I feel he is gay but men don't do that. But for women its no biggie
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by TLAX: 8:39am On Mar 25, 2017
UltraLeslie1:
Your father-in-law asked you to visit often and it's enough to seek advice from everyone online? Are you a woman? Sounds to me you were match-fixed.

A married man like you, expecting to stand for your family and you're running online because your father-in-law asked you to visit him frequently?

No wonder women are divorcing indecisive weaklings like you on a regular basis nowadays!

Epic. Apt.
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by COURVOISier(m): 8:53am On Mar 25, 2017
He loves your presence bro, but you can go at your convenience. Pls, remove that thought that he's trying to control you.
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by delishpot: 8:55am On Mar 25, 2017
Eddygourdo:
women are emotional beings nd are known to naturally express feelings to each other without lesbian things being a factor. Of course tht won't go through my mind becaause there could be many things that might demand such closeness eg helping out with things etc but same cnt be said of a father in law and son inlaw. Haba what could he possibly help him with nor discuss weekly that should warrant such friendship. We men aren't emotional like that nor do we expect it. Eg if a man hugs me for too long I get uncomfortable and withdraw not cos I feel he is gay but men don't do that. But for women its no biggie

grin grin no be small. Its all good. Papa is 70 too old for such in my opinion. The man may be lacking emotional contact. He just needs someone. I know an old man who also liked me like that. I was also avoiding him. Then he died and now I understand he just needed someone to just listen and cheer him up. Now I regret my action. Wish I was there for him.
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Eddygourdo(m): 9:12am On Mar 25, 2017
delishpot:


grin grin no be small. Its all good. Papa is 70 too old for such in my opinion. The man may be lacking emotional contact. He just needs someone. I know an old man who also liked me like that. I was also avoiding him. Then he died and now I understand he just needed someone to just listen and cheer him up. Now I regret my action. Wish I was there for him.
you can't tell if he wanted to tap ur booty since u never explored the option. In ur case I will assume ur a female. That is even undderstandable. But for man to man, when the man has sons and people his own age plus his wife is still alive. My dear one must fear being traumatized by a gay hitting on him no matter the age. Well don't regret too much we all shall meet again, maybe then u aask tht man what his intentions were, hopeful if we both in same heaven, I can now say, "see ya life, I was right"
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by AmenJoan(f): 9:17am On Mar 25, 2017
realmey:
Hello NL

I visited my father-in-law sometime in January this year
We had certain conversation that included him asking me to visit him either on a weekly or monthly basis

Hmmmm,it didn't go down well with me,though i said nothing so it does not look as if i'm disrespectful.

What if he offers 100k per visit? Will you visit?
I made up my mind it was not going to be possible as ordinarily i felt he was trying to control me;i didn't bother visiting in February as i already decided to visit at my convenience.

I really don't know if i am wrong,pls ur sincere advice

Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by gabbytabby: 9:36am On Mar 25, 2017
Dont read too much into it. It might just be his way of saying he wants you to feel comfortable around him as he considers you like one of his own. You do not have to feel obligated to go every time. You might find even his own children dont do it religiously. g


o
realmey:
Hello NL

I visited my father-in-law sometime in January this year
We had certain conversation that included him asking me to visit him either on a weekly or monthly basis

Hmmmm,it didn't go down well with me,though i said nothing so it does not look as if i'm disrespectful.

I made up my mind it was not going to be possible as ordinarily i felt he was trying to control me;i didn't bother visiting in February as i already decided to visit at my convenience.

I really don't know if i am wrong,pls ur sincere advice

Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nobody: 10:43am On Mar 25, 2017
Lexusgs430:

How often does his son/daughter visit him?
Almost daily
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Richy4(m): 10:43am On Mar 25, 2017
Eddygourdo:
women are emotional beings nd are known to naturally express feelings to each other without lesbian things being a factor. Of course tht won't go through my mind becaause there could be many things that might demand such closeness eg helping out with things etc but same cnt be said of a father in law and son inlaw. Haba what could he possibly help him with nor discuss weekly that should warrant such friendship. We men aren't emotional like that nor do we expect it. Eg if a man hugs me for too long I get uncomfortable and withdraw not cos I feel he is gay but men don't do that. But for women its no biggie

I Don't mean to quote you but you clearly got a lot to learn in life....The bold statement shows you have not even started smiley

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Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nobody: 10:45am On Mar 25, 2017
hilseger:
well... if your father-in-law na Dangote or Otedola and ask you same question i know you wont hesitate. You see your life? wen u wan marry u dey prostrate like lizard now they don give you wife finish u dey feel like say dey wan dey control u...sheraye?

Bros u wan use laugh faint meoooooo
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nobody: 10:49am On Mar 25, 2017
UltraLeslie1:
Your father-in-law asked you to visit often and it's enough to seek advice from everyone online? Are you a woman? Sounds to me you were match-fixed.

A married man like you, expecting to stand for your family and you're running online because your father-in-law asked you to visit him frequently?

No wonder women are divorcing indecisive weaklings like you on a regular basis nowadays!

Sir why do you sound so harsh?you can at least tell me what you think without a sledge hammer
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nobody: 10:52am On Mar 25, 2017
4dor:
Just go once in a while, don't expose yourself.

Thanks
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Amopeekun(f): 10:54am On Mar 25, 2017
There isn't anything to it. He only takes u as a son and doesn't want u to feel like a stranger in his house by visiting 'once in a while'. So feel free to visit and gist with the old man.
Your wife could also be his favorite child and has transferred that love to u.
He could just like u for who u are.
My dad is like that with my husband!
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nobody: 10:56am On Mar 25, 2017
IYANGBALI:
Visit him at your convenience. Na so nonesence dey take start. No give am chance to control you and please give him pikin belle quick before him change him mind about your marriage to his daughter

Blessed with kids already
Re: I Feel My Father -in -law Is Trying To Control Me by Nobody: 10:59am On Mar 25, 2017
adecares:
Your father-in-law is not as rich as Dangote that's why you don't want to be close to him.

Even if he was as rich as bill gate,there are certain lines that can't be crossed.

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