This would have been published yesterday since women all over were celebrated. Again, it would have looked like an attack on some women rather than celebrate them on their day.

I don't mean to drag anyone back by citing a scenario in the discourse, but then, it would be imperative to see the roles some women unconsciously play in certain rape cases, particularly in a country as ours.

So I strolled into the office on Monday morning, with all the positivity my strength could muster when I noticed one of my female colleagues speaking to someone over the phone. 'Honestly, it doesn't make sense! I saw the scene and nothing special happened', she said as she smiled in exchange for our usual greetings.

'She was sleeping on his bed o' she continued. Apparently, it didn't take me a split second to figure out that the subject of discussion is the event that had occurred over the weekend. We all know the gist so I don't think I need to explain this. Seemingly upset, she went on and on about how Tboss turned without resistance after what Kemen did.

'She even turned her back! Don't you understand? If it was a rape like people are saying, why didn't Tboss react aggressively rather than pretend to be asleep?' At this point, I just could not take it in any longer as my level of disgust had reached its peak. I powered my PC and went to the kitchen to do what was not on my agenda that morning, just so I could stop hearing her arguments which are no different from the ones I have been reading off of social media since the event broke.

That moment was super slow and cold for me. I found it hard to believe that most women spoke in support of Kemen than they ought to. Nothing wrong in being a fan but then we must come to the point of telling ourselves the truth when we need to.

Tboss had on several occasion done some eccentric things which are a bit extreme from the Nigerian viewpoint. I could remember a diary session in which she confessed that she and Bisola had gotten into a conversation earlier, discussing how long they have gone without sex and how unsettled they have been. These are girls' talk revealed and I don't think it concerns the men folk.

It is funny to know that women are the most delicate between the sexes but have never shared a voice when it comes to rape cases. Rather than condemn the act of the young man, most of them are more concerned about how he would be painted and perceived in bad light.

I used to think Kate Henshaw had sense, not until I saw her angle on the issue as a woman. Like most fans of Kemen, he was unfairly treated and the 'Internet would never forget' what he did. What a thinking! Here is a public figure, a lady whose viewpoint antagonizes the victim and fully stands with the schemer.

I could remember way back when a friend was raped by a fellow course mate in our second year in the university. Black (not real) was a charmer and quite loaded. Most girls loved him and never had the idea for once. He was a very good friend too at the time. Kelly (not real name) was also a friend in my circle and we treated one another as family. Long story short, Kelly visited Black who had asked a day before. That wasn't her first time of visiting and we saw nothing wrong with it. She called afterwards to tell me she needed to see me and also insisted I come in the company of some specific people.

She explained all what happened and broke down as she did. She wasn't willing to let it out because she would be blamed as the initiator turned pretender. Shortly after the news broke and almost every female course mate stood with Black who tried as much as possible to cover the issue. Kelly was forced to leave school as she could not bear the shame. Black left on transfer but Kelly the victim took the fall.

I guess this explains why most sexually abused women would rather choose to die in silence than open up and be blamed for their own assault. It is sickening to the stomach. I believe I don't need to paint the picture around Kemen's ordeal but the most important thing is that the concept and build up for rape was clearly defined in the scenario - there was no consent which is enough to see anyone behind bars. However, this has got nothing to do with Kemen but the ladies who have come to see Tboss as the 'witch' that she is.

In no distant time, our rape game would tow the way of India since those who ought to speak against the scourge are the ones who are more concerned about the stigma that would trail the man.

Still in the mood of celebrating every woman in the world over, what is bad should stay bad and not be clouded by sentiments and blame. The Nigerian culture is fast becoming scary.

Its just so sad, women are their own worst enemy

Both men and women can be raped. When a guy molest a girl, it's rape but when a girl molest a guy they'll say it is greenlight.

Leave Kemen alone... He already apologized.. I don't know why people are over flogging the issue...


Carry another person matter for head like dandruff..

Smh

Jodha:
Leave Kemen alone... He already apologized.. I don't know why people are over flogging the issue...


Carry another person matter for head like dandruff..

Smh

You're one of the females I referred to in my write up. This isn't about Kemen but ladies who stand to defend rape acts. But then again, you cannot know this because you lazy to read but quick to assume.

Sanchez01:

You're one of the females I referred to in my write up. This isn't about Kemen but ladies who stand to defend rape acts. But then again, you cannot know this because you lazy to read but quick to assume.

I read all what yhu posted.. What I'm saying is that the matter shouldn't be over flogged.. He's a guy like yhurself.. Maybe he made one silly mistake.. But why. Should people that have done worse or will do worst if placed in his shoes.. Crucify hum..

Every sensible lady will stress that tboss is a she-devil.. Because we're ladies.. We know how our minds work(to some extent).. While I'm totally condemning what Kemen did... I think yhu should understand that tboss kinda did it on purpose.. Now she's playing the victim..

Mind yhu when Kemen saw she turned.. If yhu checked the video.. He didn't push anymore.. He stopped..

That was her game plan in kicking Kemen out.. She still came out and said.. She was on her period.. Blah blah.. She planned him well (that's not a rape case)..

I'm not a fan of Kemen in any way.. I don't like him. Cause he talks too much..[/b] But this is my opinion..! [b]

Jodha:


I read all what yhu posted.. What I'm saying is that the matter shouldn't be over flogged.. He's a guy like yhurself.. Maybe he made one silly mistake.. But why. Should people that have done worse or will do worst if placed in his shoes.. Crucify hum..

Every sensible lady will stress that tboss is a she-devil.. Because we're ladies.. We know how our minds work(to some extent).. While I'm totally condemning what Kemen did... I think yhu should understand that tboss kinda did it on purpose.. Now she's playing the victim..

Mind yhu when Kemen saw she turned.. If yhu checked the video.. He didn't push anymore.. He stopped..

That was her game plan in kicking Kemen out.. She still came out and said.. She was on her period.. Blah blah.. She planned him well (that's not a rape case)..

I'm not a fan of Kemen in any way.. I don't like him. Cause he talks too much..[/b] But this is my opinion..! [b]

If you claim you read the post then the place of comprehension is missing. For the umpteenth time, THIS ISN'T ABOUT KEMEN AND TBOSS BUT THE STANCE OF MOST WOMEN ON RAPE CASES!

I mentioned in the post that this is not an attempt to take us back to the whole event but only citing it as a case study.

In a complex society as ours, women take the fall for most rape cases even though the law is eventually involved. I equally cited a real life event in the post just to buttress my points.

That you walk before me in a provocative manner is not a justifiable reason why I should rape you. That Tboss is a She-devil is not an excuse that she be assaulted. Again, this isn't about Kemen and how devilish Tboss is. A woman could be violated in several ways, and that she enjoyed it or not is not the bone of contention but that she was indeed violated is.

It is ironic that this is coming from me, a male, to you, a female. Tboss is a witch sent from the Underworld to cripple the Nigerian economy, I believe you, but it does not justify a thing. I hope you catch this now.

Very well written and timely piece. Rape and other forms of assault will continue to thrive if we do not squash the victim-blaming syndrome, which ironically is carried out by more women than men.

How will we grow when humans like Jodha think a rape case is being blown out of proportion and someone deserves to be assaulted for being a "she-devil"?

Sanchez01:

If you claim you read the post then the place of comprehension is missing. For the umpteenth time, THIS ISN'T ABOUT KEMEN AND TBOSS BUT THE STANCE OF MOST WOMEN ON RAPE CASES!

I mentioned in the post that this is not an attempt to take us back to the whole event but only citing it as a case study.

In a complex society as ours, women take the fall for most rape cases even though the law is eventually involved. I equally cited a real life event in the post just to buttress my points.

That you walk before me in a provocative manner is not a justifiable reason why I should rape you. That Tboss is a She-devil is not an excuse that she be assaulted. Again, this isn't about Kemen and how devilish Tboss is. A woman could be violated in several ways, and that she enjoyed it or not is not the bone of contention but that she was indeed violated is.

It is ironic that this is coming from me, a male, to you, a female. Tboss is a witch sent from the Underworld to cripple the Nigerian economy, I believe you, but it does not justify a thing. I hope you catch this now.

Exactly.. What I'm saying in essence in that.. The case between tboss and Kemen shouldn't be yhur case study.. Because that's not a rape case..

freda506:
Very well written and timely piece. Rape and other forms of assault will continue to thrive if we do not squash the victim-blaming syndrome, which ironically is carried out by more women than men.

How will we grow when humans like Jodha think a rape case is being blown out of proportion and someone deserves to be assaulted for being a "she-devil"?

Dearie read my post again.. Before yhu fly into conclusions..
I typed " the case between Kemen and tboss is over flogged".. I never stated rape case was being blowned outta proportion.. I'm a lady.. I wouldn't be in my right senses to support a gruesome act such as rape" it's despicable ".. Plus I never stated" tboss deserves to be raped"... What part of that wasn't a rape case don't yhu guys understand..

Please if yhure gonna misquote everything I type.. Do not me give any unnecessary mention again..

Thank yhu!

Jodha:


Exactly.. What I'm saying in essence in that.. The case between tboss and Kemen shouldn't be yhur case study.. Because that's not a rape case..

It seems we are running in circles here... This is not about the event between the duo. You prolly don't understand a thing here.

I honestly don't have the strength to explain what I have written when it is direct and crystal clear.

PEOPLE SHOULD LEARN WHAT CONSENT MEANS.and victim blamers need rehabilitation.thumbs up to op