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Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by OAM4J: 6:49am On Dec 26, 2009 |
Full Story Here |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by OAM4J: 7:03am On Dec 26, 2009 |
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Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Akebulan: 8:46am On Dec 26, 2009 |
Poor kids |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Nobody: 10:03am On Dec 26, 2009 |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by coolier(f): 3:27pm On Dec 26, 2009 |
Men!!! Now he is turning the tables against her when all she's ever done is stand by him, protect and shield him from the greatest embarrassment. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Fhemmmy: 7:36pm On Dec 26, 2009 |
chaircover: True that, however, i think the woman shd have refused . . . but in Nija, the man is the king, president and everything. I pity the woman sha. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Nobody: 7:58pm On Dec 26, 2009 |
Poor kids! I feel sorry for the wife too. As for the husband, well, I feel his new faith came at the wrong time. And at a price too. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by mamagee3(f): 9:27pm On Dec 26, 2009 |
Very silly and worthless husband I've ever heard of |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Sissy3(f): 8:25am On Dec 27, 2009 |
i coudnt have agreed more with the womans daughter on this "if she was the one barren am quite sure that my father would take a second wife". see all the risks, length and embarrassment this poor woman went through just so to protect the impotency of this man? but lets turn the table and assume the woman was the one barren, she would be called all sorts names from being a "witch and eating/sacrificing all her children to having no "womb" because she has supposedly killed all her future kids with her enormous "abortion" and being a "man" when the man was sending her forth to "get/bring" him children he didnt realize that one day he would want to go to heaven"? my happiness is that the children are older now, at least they know better than their supposedly BS "father". am sure they have a mother who loves their dearly and appreciates them. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by No2Atheism(m): 8:40am On Dec 27, 2009 |
- Restitution can be a very painful process . . . from experience . . . and the reality is that you can spend your entire life doing restitution without any end in sigth . . . hence the issue has to be handled from the sincerity of heart and looking for a partner/people that would not keep your shame a secret but instead are willing to support you through the trauma of guilt and shame . . and also willing to truthfully reveal your shame. - In terms of this story, i would have merely advised the man to just let the children know the situation and also[b] let the men involved[/b] know the situation instead of trying to force the children out of the house to pacify his conscience . . .cus in reality the only people that were wronged by his actions are the children, his immediate family member and the men involved. - We humans interact since the day we were born hence if we start making restitution for each and every wrong thing we did in life, life itself would grind to a halt . . .nevertheless that does not mean we should not do restitution, hence where it becomes necessary to have a sincere heart and people around you to discuss with and determine what is right and what is wrong. - It is better for the children to decided themselves whether they wish to stay with him or not . . . cus in reality . . . he is about to affect the life of at least 3 children . . . - He has no right to seek to divorce the woman considering that the woman stood with him and agreed to sleep with other men to fufil his wish in the onset . . . - Would they ever forget the problem . . . i doubt it, however healing and trying to overcome the problem can be done by informing the children and the men involved, and also having the courage to tell the truth when anyone decides to ask him about the children . . . - What he is doing now would not change the past . . . hence divorcing the woman would not change the past . . .cus the reality is that the woman would always remain his wife cus the fact is that the bible does not really recognise such a divorce cus in reality the wife did not commit adultery becuase he himself was the one who told the wife to sleep with other men . . . it was not the idea of the woman. - That is why the bible says a man that finds a wife (not a love mate) finds a good thing, cus the reality is that sooner or later most of us (including me) are bound to do things or get involved in things that we regret. . . it is the wife or husband that is going to help us through those issues. - It feels like he is trying to justify his own conscience by crucifying the wife . . . he is not right in trying to force the woman to comply, she has to come to that realisation herself and on her own. Siena: True repentance always comes at a price . . . hence why it helps not to lead a promiscous life and try to do as much good as possible so that when the time of reckoning comes . . . there would be as little scars as possible. coolier: That is the part that I also do not like . . .cus all she has done is love him and do as he requested . . . When the threat became much, I had no choice but to involve his family members who tried to talk sense into his head,” the woman said. This is the most dangerous part of resitution in that we can sometimes overdo it . . . cus we think that is what helps us overcome our guilt . . . the reality is that "talking about it" . . . reality is that resitution is just an evidence of a sincere heart . . .it is not a prerequisite for salvation (otherwise the thief on the cross would not have been saved). Hence why resitution must be done with wisdom . . . |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by No2Atheism(m): 8:47am On Dec 27, 2009 |
This question might sound weird or naive . . .but what exactly does it mean for a man to be impotent . . . - does it mean he cannot impregnate a woman by physically sleeping with her even though he is still producing sperms. or - does it mean his sperm cannot fertilise the egg of a woman. or - does it mean his is unable to even sleep with a woman . . .even though he is still producing sperms. or - does it mean he is unable to sleep with a woman and he is also not producing sperms. Cus from my own little understanding if he can have sex with his wife but cannot impregnate her then wats the problem so long as it is still possible for him to artificially inseminate her eggs with his sperm . . . Its understandable that there might not be technologies like that in the past, but at least now that there is tech like that, is it not possible for him to at least try to see if she is still producing eggs so that his sperm (which a man is supposed to have all throughout his life) can then be used to artificially inseminate her. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by skfa1: 8:57am On Dec 27, 2009 |
Thank You Jesus. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by No2Atheism(m): 9:01am On Dec 27, 2009 |
Check the definition of impotence on this weblink http://hcd2.bupa.co.uk/fact_sheets/html/Impotence.html The definition given for impotence on that is not as bad as people make it out to be . . . |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by N101: 11:43am On Dec 27, 2009 |
When I see articles like this I find it annoying that impotence is never clearly defined either as impotency (erectile dysfunction) or infertility (low sperm count). |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Nobody: 12:13am On Dec 28, 2009 |
the man is confused. The children are still his inasmuch as he raised them and had a prior agreement with his wife about fathering them. He can consider them adopted but they're still his children. The way they were conceived is what he should repent of instead of rejecting the kids outrightly. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Sissy3(f): 5:01am On Dec 28, 2009 |
tpia.: very well said. especially the bolded part! |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by jumie(f): 2:42pm On Dec 28, 2009 |
The man is going about this the wrong way!!! Those kids are still his responsibility. He should simply take them as his adopted children (which they are) and continue to bring them up. Asking them to be returned to their biological fathers is unnecessary as it will not only bring shame upon him but also upon his entire family. How would he as a man feel, if suddenly someday, some grown-up kid walks up to him and says, "Am your son from "Caroline" whom you had a fling with a couple of years ago?" That is exaclty what he is asking his wife and kids to do. No one would like to wake up to the rude shock of the existence of any child of theirs, without any prior inkling of such. The woman should simply take heart. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Outstrip(f): 6:07am On Dec 30, 2009 |
The man is selfish. Maybe God did not make a mistake. Not everyone has what it takes to be a father. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by sayso: 9:29am On Dec 30, 2009 |
So he wants her to sleep with other men and she did,now he wants her to return the kids,is there a problem,I do not see any if you ask. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Outstrip(f): 7:04pm On Dec 30, 2009 |
sayso: What are you talking about? Are children a defective product you buy and return to the store. I just wonder what the worth of a human being is in that Nigeria. The children are the woman's biological child. The man is an idiot 5 times over. Return the kids my foot. Thank God the 22 year old seems to have some sense. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Hairat007(f): 10:42am On Jan 03, 2010 |
Na wa oh |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by tallgal(f): 1:35pm On Jan 03, 2010 |
What Hairat said. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Digriz(m): 12:43pm On Jan 04, 2010 |
That man is idiot and he might still nt make that heaven. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by johnkaro(m): 8:00pm On Jan 06, 2010 |
You see! it was just yesterday in my church Bible study somebody asked this question painting exactly this same story. you know some people may not believe what I am about to say but I have to say it. Here in this part of the World people go about things without proper knowledge of what they are doing or how do you want to explain this, a woman out of your ignorance and selfishness you have push out to commit ungodly act when u were not born-again; now that u claim that u are born-again. the same you again exhibiting your gross selfishness asking her to return the products of that same selfishness with the intention of also selfishness of going to Heaven alone to their biological fathers of which according to the story is only God knows their whereabout, "if only the wife is also sincere of that" It is really sad that people are trying to drag God Almighty into their messy life in the name of senseless restitution. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Ndipe(m): 1:04am On Feb 25, 2012 |
In Arrow of god by Chinua Achebe, one of the characters in the novel, Akukalia, was impotent and his wives were given out to men to bear children for 'him'. It's practised in certain cultures under a cloak of secrecy, but please quote me on this, I dont approve of it. Another one is a polygamist who converts to Christianity, and in some instances, 'instructed' to divorce his multiple wives on grounds that the practise of polygamy contradicts the tenets of Christianity. Some men do obey, while others renounce the faith and return back to their previous religion. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by Ivynwa(f): 2:38am On Feb 25, 2012 |
The sooner we begin to live for ourselves and not for others the healthier life will be for everybody. Some of us in Nigeria live in fear of what people will say over one problem or the other and sometimes ruin their lives by so doing. Another man in this kind of position killed himself after he married the first wife and on not making children with her, chased her away and went for another woman who also could not make a child for him too. When he could not bear the shame of "what people will say" he killed himself. It's good to hear the children involved in this pulling themselves together, encouraging themselves and trying to be strong. I hope they don't also allow the fear of "what people will say" over them to cast a dark shadow over their lives. As for the man, he needs to seek restitution over the c-o-pulation between his parents that brought him to life. He needs to find a way back into his mother's belly to be an ovum/egg again and return his father's sp-er-m to him too so that everybody will sing hosanna on the way to heaven. Huh Why did the woman stay to be dragged to court by him, had she quietly left the whole bachannal with her children she wouldn't have been there to answer query in court. If he doesn't want the children again, she should leave him with her children----simple or will he force himself on her to stay married so that he doesn't miss heaven? All these people that go to some churches and allow others to watch their head and manipulate their thinking in the name of religion only to bring chaos and disorder into their families at the end of the day. The thing tire me o-o-o. I even pity the man too, he must be feeling terrible right now too with all that confusion in his head. |
Re: Man Encouraged Wife To Sleep With Men For Kids, Now Wants The Children Returned by chiozor: 8:31pm On Mar 25, 2012 |
sayso: So he wants her to sleep with other men and she did,now he wants her to return the kids,is there a problem,I do not see any if you ask.The only sensible response. |
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