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'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? - Family - Nairaland

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My Husband's Family Is Sucking Him Dry / She Is Single And Living On Rented Apartment, Away From Family ! Is It Good? / I Want To Get Married But My Family Is Insisting I Must Settle Everybody First (2) (3) (4)

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'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by jmoore(m): 5:41pm On Apr 06, 2017
I don't understand why some folks think it is normal for a wife to give her husband a grossly inflated budget.


I know my mom very well, she doesn't give inflated budget. She gives the exact price.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by ojun50(m): 5:48pm On Apr 06, 2017
We knw yr mum is cool
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 5:50pm On Apr 06, 2017
Not cool, be it from the wife or the kids, if you need extra money, simply ask

2 Likes

Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by thehedge(f): 6:48pm On Apr 06, 2017
Tadeknkeepcalm:
Not cool, be it from the wife or the kids, if you need extra money, simply ask
really?? will you simply give? undecided

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Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by ifyalways(f): 7:50pm On Apr 06, 2017
That is one of the elecha-aghara of marriage. There must be some atom of it, in different forms for a peaceful marriage, over sabi and I-too-know brings in nothing but avoidable headache.

Yes, you are strong and wise but for your spouse, you have to ignore somethings sometimes. It can be a padded market list, soiled toilet seat, stinking socks and shoes littered everywhere etc.

Besides, there might be little things here and there a woman buys from time to time for the home that she won't necessarily go to the husband for. It's from those little monies that she does all that. If your wife is a housewife and pads her list, so long as it's reasonable and you can afford it, it's not worth the noise.

1 Like

Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 11:03pm On Apr 06, 2017
thehedge:
really?? will you simply give? undecided
If you have a substantial reason for the extra allowance, why not?
Stealing is stealing, no matter the form, no matter the victim.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 4:02am On Apr 07, 2017
thehedge:
really?? will you simply give? undecided
you are guilty as charged .
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by nnamdibig(m): 8:01am On Apr 07, 2017
When it's between husband and wife, moderation is the word.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 8:36am On Apr 07, 2017
Is the husband allowed to do padding with his wife ? No why ? Because he has integrity ? Does that mean .........
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Acidosis(m): 9:42am On Apr 07, 2017
This issue of padded budget has become a plague in today's society. It goes far beyond marriage.

A lot of students today pad their school fee, pocket money, accommodation (rent), etc. It is the same reason many Nigerians are unemployable because many employers don't trust their employees; it is the same reason I see a lot of crooks on Nairaland, but of course, I'm not gullible so I don't fall for easily.

If you're a parent and you have kids that pad school fees, it means you're a failed parent. Kids who truly love their parents don't stress them or make them go extra miles to fulfil their criminal tendencies. Same apply to partners in marriage. If you hate padding, then simply avoid a stingy partner. The key word is trust, your own reputation... If you pad budget for your husband, there is no way you won't steal your employers money. Majority of those who practice this act are the same set of people who steal customers monies in bank to invest in Treasury Bills. They are the same set of criminals that monitor accounts, waiting for a rich customer to die so they can divert the funds.


In fact, the best way to test a typical Nigerian is to demand a price list on items. I can assure you 99.9% will fail that test.. crooks everywhere.

I wish the society will condemn this attitude before it becomes uncontrollable. Give a Nigerian N10000 to buy a N9500 product, rather than make a refund, they will go telling you how price has skyrocketed.

There is one way to sight a dishonest person, give him N1000 to buy a product of N800... Do not demand for "change" and wait for the response. Majority will not return it.. It is the same way politicians give over-bloated budget. spend it recklessly without making any form of refund.

Nigeria is such a corrupt country, too corrupt to be redeemed. The word integrity is same, whether it is practiced at home or at workplace.

If only all Nigerians can share same mentality with me about money, especially monies entrusted into our hands. Even if the "change" is N5, I Acidosis, will return your change. It's of no use to me.

I hope to pass this ideology to my children. There's no gain in padding.. We all fault Dino Melaye today, forgetting where he came from. When he padded school fees (assumption), it was legal; when he stole his departmental association levy, na sharp guy; today is still stealing like his destiny depends on padding, and everyone is yelling. Like his colleagues, he will continue to steal and there is nothing anyone will or can do about it, after all he is only stealing Nigeria's money (he is a Nigerian)... Same way you're stealing your partner's monies (it is a family)..

lol

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Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by jmoore(m): 5:29pm On Apr 08, 2017
Any woman that can steal from her husband, can also steal from anyone.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Acidosis(m): 6:31pm On Apr 08, 2017
jmoore:
Any woman that can steal from her husband, can also steal from anyone.
Exactly
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by bukatyne(f): 9:39pm On Apr 08, 2017
Depends on the family dynamics

Some husbands expect padded budgets; dome don't like it.

Personally, I think it's wrong same with inflating fees and other stuffs.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by bukatyne(f): 9:40pm On Apr 08, 2017
jmoore:
Any woman that can steal from her husband, can also steal from anyone.

Not necessarily

Also depends if the wife sees it as 'stealing'.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Dyt(f): 10:50pm On Apr 08, 2017
Acidosis:
If you pad budget for your husband, there is no way you won't steal your employers money. Majority of those who practice this act are the same set of people who steal customers monies in bank to invest in Treasury Bills. They are the same set of criminals that monitor accounts, waiting for a rich customer to die so they can divert the funds.


Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:50pm On Apr 08, 2017
OP na wa o. You mean you are the type that demands "explanation" from his wife on how she spend money for the family? Please, cut the ladies some slack. They can pad if they want to as long as they use the money for themselves and the family.

The man's money is for the family and not for the man alone. This to me is not padding, it's the wife's way of raising capital in case of contingencies or for some other needs.

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Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:55pm On Apr 08, 2017
Tadeknkeepcalm:

If you have a substantial reason for the extra allowance, why not?
Stealing is stealing, no matter the form, no matter the victim.
You mean she should even ask you for money to buy undies? And that isn't stealing
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 10:44am On Apr 09, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
You mean she should even ask you for money to buy undies? And that isn't stealing
Allowance is different from stipends bros, if you're paying your wife100k monthly , and plumber comes and fixes some things , his pay is 3k, does it make sense that she adds extra 2k? Or the 100k stipend is not enough to get her undies?, go and sit down jor

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Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 10:51am On Apr 09, 2017
Tadeknkeepcalm:

Allowance is different from stipends bros, if you're paying your wife100k monthly , and plumber comes and fixes some things , his pay is 3k, does it make sense that she adds extra 2k? Or the 100k stipend is not enough to get her undies?, go and sit down jor
How many men pay their wives 100k monthly? How much is even the minimum wage? please factor reality when arguing.

A man who gives his wife 100k as allowance monthly will not be bothered with peanut like 5-10k extras. Abi no be the same 100k wey we know?

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Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 11:19am On Apr 09, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
How many men pay their wives 100k monthly? How much is even the minimum wage? please factor reality when arguing.

A man who gives his wife 100k as allowance monthly will not be bothered with peanut like 5-10k extras. Abi no be the same 100k wey we know?
So you are not even bothered that a woman collecting 100k is still trying to get 5k from you, like that's greed, and these little things count..very much. Even if I'm the richest man in the world, and I'm giving you more than enough, and you dare manipulate shiit for me.. In short, what is bad is bad.
PS: I said 100k to make an instance that some women get enough, at least relatively.
Moving to the reality check, a man earns 100k monthly, pays all the bills in the house, even pays the fish seller, and still gives his wife 25k, relatively, isn't that enough? Like seriously, why would I marry a pest?
Bros I don tire, you're entitled to your opinion.

1 Like

Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 12:07pm On Apr 09, 2017
Tadeknkeepcalm:

Allowance is different from stipends bros, if you're paying your wife100k monthly , and plumber comes and fixes some things , his pay is 3k, does it make sense that she adds extra 2k? Or the 100k stipend is not enough to get her undies?, go and sit down jor

Tell me something

Never knew being a wife is now a career job with handsome reward of 100k monthly...eeh


what ever you mean by that kindly edit your misleading post bro



Anyway expenses padding is a sign of irresponsible, selfish and gold digging wife
.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 6:44pm On Apr 09, 2017
There is nothing wrong with it, given the way prices of goods and services have skyrocketed. You wouldn't blame us tongue.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Apollux(m): 7:58pm On Apr 09, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
OP na wa o. You mean you are the type that demands "explanation" from his wife on how she spend money for the family? Please, cut the ladies some slack. They can pad if they want to as long as they use the money for themselves and the family.

The man's money is for the family and not for the man alone. This to me is not padding, it's the wife's way of raising capital in case of contingencies or for some other needs.
Since the money is for the family, pls can u tell me if the wife will over look if the child pad a particular item or refuse to return the balance after being sent on an errand?

1 Like

Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 8:23pm On Apr 09, 2017
Apollux:

Since the money is for the family, pls can u tell me if the wife will over look if the child pad a particular item or refuse to return the balance after being sent on an errand?
We are talking of man and wife not the kids.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Apollux(m): 4:18am On Apr 10, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
We are talking of man and wife not the kids.
It's all d same thing. If the wife feel it is right for her to get extra cash from her husband by that means then she should also accept when the same is done to her by the children... Else she is a double standard hypocrite

2 Likes

Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 11:38am On Apr 10, 2017
Apollux:

It's all d same thing. If the wife feel it is right for her to get extra cash from her husband by that means then she should also accept when the same is done to her by the children... Else she is a double standard hypocrite
A man is married to his wife Not his kids. He and his wife were joined as ONE, the kids are only products of the union. The wife has more privileges than the kids..
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by jmoore(m): 12:03pm On Apr 10, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
A man is married to his wife Not his kids. He and his wife were joined as ONE, the kids are only products of the union. The wife has more privileges than the kids..

Privilege to 'pad' family budget? undecided
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by Nobody: 12:58pm On Apr 10, 2017
I think it's wrong. As a student I never did that to my parents.

but it seems it's a normal thing among married women to pad budget just to get more from their husbands.

Why can't you just ask him for more instead.

if he's a stingy man then that's your cross to carry.

Budget padding is wrong, no matter who does it.

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Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 5:43pm On Apr 10, 2017
jmoore:


Privilege to 'pad' family budget? undecided
As long as she use the money for herself and the family...

It is called "miscellaneous"
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by ifyalways(f): 7:31pm On Apr 10, 2017
TonyeBarcanista:
As long as she use the money for herself and the family...

It is called "miscellaneous"
There are people you don't argue with online regarding marital issues ; professional spinsters/bachelors with perfect theoretical answers to every marital issue. You just drop your opinion and move it. LOL

I mean how can you convince people who have not even managed common bf/Gf relationships successfully that it's never black or white in marriage but whatever works for each person?

You go go back and forth tire sha.
Re: 'Budget Padding' In The Family, Is It Corruption? by TonyeBarcanista(m): 9:30pm On Apr 10, 2017
ifyalways:

There are people you don't argue with online regarding marital issues ; professional spinsters/bachelors with perfect theoretical answers to every marital issue. You just drop your opinion and move it. LOL

I mean how can you convince people who have not even managed common bf/Gf relationships successfully that it's never black or white in marriage but whatever works for each person?

You go go back and forth tire sha.
God Bless you!

Some youngsters just like complicating life for their partners. Personally, I see whatever income or fortune I have/get as belonging to the family not myself as single individual. In fact, I prefer having my lady control money at home in full freedom trusting that she will judiciously use them for the interest of the family and herself as well.

What people don't get is that when you allow partners freedom and sense of ownership (which is rightly so) they feel secured, happy and assured. If the man get broke tomorrow they will understand that he isn't a tight fist. People should understand that a man giving money to his wife is not doing her any favor, he is only seeing to his responsibility as primary provider.

And YES, whatever I have is ours, whatever she has is hers.... e no mean say I no go "borrow" from her, and e no mean say she no go add 1000% interest on any amount I "borrowed" from her... I love it...

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