MrBrownJay1:


So you mean to say that living as common law husband and wife is different because of that piece of paper?
Let me guess, traditional marriage also makes someone an expert compared to common law spouses, right?
Oh lawd!!!!

Some of you people make absolutely no damn sense, no wonder so many clueless people are getting married up and down. While having no clue about marriage.

Padiga:
first of all, what is common law?

Awoo88:

e bi like say u and buhari dry run on the same os.o

MrBrownJay1:


Living as husband and wife but without being married.... Meaning living together, having children etc
Educate yourself on the issue, so that you understand that common law union have exactly the same RIGHTS as married union, thus are as experienced about couple's issues as anyone else out there.

Funkybabee:
she is saying nonsense Yoruba says 'iri ri Lagba' shey me wey a done see yawa from my sister marriage or street sisters out there, u go dey say I should not contribute my opinion to marriage stuff . my sister go and sit down joor some married people self can't have good advice like us,because of experience,no word is small that's what Yoruba says

Padiga:
you placed all importance on the certificate.


A couple who lived together for years, having children are as married to me as those with the paperwork.

The differentiation should be between SINGLES and MARRIED.

MrBrownJay1:


Sadly many believe that the marriage certificate makes spouses experts, while unmarried people NOT.

Focus on how many time OP mentioned marriage, as her benchmark for expert status

BTW: if married people become expert on union the day they get married, then the day 2 people move in together, they also should get that status, right then.

Davash222:
The irony is, Singl e s gives best marital advice.

MrBrownJay1:
ARRANT NONSENSE?!!? Yeah i think so.

---

There are many people who are unmarried because they respect marriage, know the sacrifices that it takes to be happily married , and/or how to KEEP being happily married, AND they fully well know they don't have it in them. That makes them more suited to give advises than any foolish person who think marriage is just:"signing on the dotted line, and you are good to go"

SmartMugu:


Yup.
Marriage ain't no joke, so I don't blame people taking their time to find the right person or just outrightly deciding to be single. After spending time to find the 'right' person, the 'right' person may end up having the wrong in-laws or friends and their tiny voices can take you back where you started from - learning a new version of your spouse all over again - that's if it's worth it at all to learn one person any longer when you can just move on to someone else that can make their own decisions without external influences.
I think the western culture is gradually infiltrating Nigeria in that area, that's why people talk about divorce here and there.

Typical marriages in the US let's the bride and groom sign about 3 or 4 pages of paper, for better and for worst things. A divorce on same marriage will require you signing about 43 pages of paper on same topic! You see questions like "Who is authorized to have the kids on Christmas day?", "Who will be paying for their healthcare", etc. Thats when people realise they were scammed all along. Is it by force to marry and stay married?

I know someone that married a lady in the US and three months later, they weren't getting along and they decided to divorce each other. In court, she claimed she got used to the expensive lifestyle the guy exposed her to and she will not be able to bear life without him anymore. Divorce judge ordered the guy to pay her $500 per month for the next 5 years! Dude is still dealing with the payments, for just saying "I do", signing some papers with a girl and staying with her for just 3 months? No kids. To the girl, onto the next one. Marrying people for just a tiny bit of time is her means of income. Her first husband pays her on same grounds, my dude doing same. That can't happen in Nigeria, the judicial system isn't even together yet. With the Internet age, just watch that nonsense get to Africa.

So, who blames those that prefer having just baby mamas and baby daddies? Nobody is signing no papers, properties don't have to be shared, joint custody of kids, hire a cook if you need someone that can cook, get a mister or a mistress if you need someone in za oza room, no need getting all upset over one spouse's actions, no in-law headaches. Abeg.

SmartMugu:


Yup.
Marriage ain't no joke, so I don't blame people taking their time to find the right person or just outrightly deciding to be single. After spending time to find the 'right' person, the 'right' person may end up having the wrong in-laws or friends and their tiny voices can take you back where you started from - learning a new version of your spouse all over again - that's if it's worth it at all to learn one person any longer when you can just move on to someone else that can make their own decisions without external influences.
I think the western culture is gradually infiltrating Nigeria in that area, that's why people talk about divorce here and there.

Typical marriages in the US let's the bride and groom sign about 3 or 4 pages of paper, for better and for worst things. A divorce on same marriage will require you signing about 43 pages of paper on same topic! You see questions like "Who is authorized to have the kids on Christmas day?", "Who will be paying for their healthcare", etc. Thats when people realise they were scammed all along. Is it by force to marry and stay married?

I know someone that married a lady in the US and three months later, they weren't getting along and they decided to divorce each other. In court, she claimed she got used to the expensive lifestyle the guy exposed her to and she will not be able to bear life without him anymore. Divorce judge ordered the guy to pay her $500 per month for the next 5 years! Dude is still dealing with the payments, for just saying "I do", signing some papers with a girl and staying with her for just 3 months? No kids. To the girl, onto the next one. Marrying people for just a tiny bit of time is her means of income. Her first husband pays her on same grounds, my dude doing same. That can't happen in Nigeria, the judicial system isn't even together yet. With the Internet age, just watch that nonsense get to Africa.

So, who blames those that prefer having just baby mamas and baby daddies? Nobody is signing no papers, properties don't have to be shared, joint custody of kids, hire a cook if you need someone that can cook, get a mister or a mistress if you need someone in za oza room, no need getting all upset over one spouse's actions, no in-law headaches. Abeg.

Khd95:
hmmmm I think she made sense, small

InvertedHammer:


You made sense. At the same time you are a liar.
Alimony payment in US is for only 50% of the period of marriage unless the marriage is more than 10 years.

So in the example stated, the man would pay the lady for 1 month and a half (not five years). I don't know any judge that will give such other because it is illegal.

Adadioranma79:
Better single with your peace of mind and dignity than be counted among those with multiple failed marriages. Marriage is a no no for me until I am ready mentally, emotionally, financially and in every sense of it. No need starting what I can't finish or putting another into unending misery all cos I want the bear a "Mrs" or shut the mouth of people. I rest my case.

Crazytrump:
Na true jor but come to think of it, where u used "us" Are you 30 and still single?

Davash222:
The irony is, Singles gives best marital advice.

MysteriousAnn:
She has a point. Single ladies who can't even have a lasting relationship with their parents and siblings, will be giving a married woman of 15 years advice. Not their fault, If not for morons that take their relationship issues to the public.

SmartMugu:


I didn't lie. I don't even lie, why would I do that on a random forum to some random people I don't even know?
That's what he told me about his marriage. I live in the US, so your mention of 50% and other stuff you mentioned just shows you don't know what you're saying about the US. You probably still live with mom and dad, or just new to the US. Otherwise, you would have learnt things vary from state to state in the US. Marriage laws are different from state to state, why then would you assume divorce laws are same all over the US? Have you ever thought of why people fly to Vegas to marry versus another city they live in? If you haven't, then don't say nothing else.

There may be some other pre-nuptial agreements or jointly owned properties. It may be for more than just alimony. Dude is an architect and makes about $85k, his wife didn't work according to him. I don't know his home like he did.

Outrightly calling me a liar over my comment is wrong. I know this place wayyy more than you.