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She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by DMerciful(m): 9:31am On Jul 22, 2017
The issue here is the girl said no sex to him while dating but after their breakup, she was giving several men sex! does it mean she doesnt love him enuf to have sex with him like the others after him? she came back to him insisting no sex yet she has been quite loose. U decided to pick the part where you can protect the lady...hmmmm..women liberation!
Now that he is well-to-do, its convenient for her to say yes....she is a manipulator!
lovelygurl:
I don't get it. I came here looking for a super dark secret and found none.

I don't even know or understand why you are now thinking of not marrying her. It wasn't like she got pregnant WHILE you guys were dating. She had a stillbirth, so what? Is it her fault? You and your ex did worse, you ABORTED a child who was unfortunate to be yours.

I also don't get how sex is related to she having a stillbirth, and you aborting. It seems that's the real problem here: "sex"

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Tlion19: 9:31am On Jul 22, 2017
If u both were meant to be together NOBODY can stop that.
God works in mysterious was believe me.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by SirVintageCock: 9:31am On Jul 22, 2017
She hates you for sleeping with her neighbour abi relation. That stinks, man!! To the fvcking high heavens damn it. You broke a fvcking dating code which I don't believe you've apologized for.

She is accepting you now because both of you stinks to the fourth hell. Ewww Put a ring on her finger and fvck her and be done with it, but going by what you wrote up there you won't get tired of fvcking her in fifty years.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by FRANKOSKI(m): 9:31am On Jul 22, 2017
Fast and pray and God will direct you in his own way.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Rosarie(f): 9:32am On Jul 22, 2017
from my observation. I have been married 5years.she never genuinely loved you.dunno y girls have a thing for loving a guy who don't love them much and treat the one who loves them like thrash.she never loved you.she has always had you as a second option.now that is in the past.now she knows YOU are now her future hubby.she is now trying to adjust.that is why she opened up a secret like that to u.for me when I met my hubby he loved me far more than I did.and with time I began to fall in love with him and here we are.genuinely happy even with the ups and down.my bro go ahead.to see a real wife material is difficult now.let the past bury itself.spin her for more if there is more and go ahead.

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by MrPresident1: 9:33am On Jul 22, 2017
FRANKOSKI:
Fast and pray and God will direct you in his own way.

I support this position with all my heart.

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Natudu: 9:33am On Jul 22, 2017
Guy, she shouldn't marry you if you can't even keep her secret. Social media generation.

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by darlenese(f): 9:34am On Jul 22, 2017
I know the Op pain, she has given her condo to a school boyfriend and a man she got pregnant for, how come she didn't allow the Op to have a taste?

when it comes to the Op it becomes a no-sex relationship but it involves other men, she allows them enjoy her. Pls Op dnt be in a rush to get married to her , do some more investigation, try and introduce yourself to her family so she can freely spend more time with u.

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:34am On Jul 22, 2017
Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?


There's nothing very dark about this secret....what if she ddnt tell u...the next girl u want to start over with nko? ....Do u know if she has a womb at all??......
.....dont let any girl bobo u with lies that I had sex only once, no be we guys dey straff dem??....no be we dey give dem money for abortion..??
Only very few girls never do abortion oooo...even some of those u see with a child claiming good girl that they ddnt want to commit abortion have done it 4 times before, so they decide to keep based on doctors advice....
Marry the girl if she's a good lady...don't leave because of one small minor detail...guy..there's no green grass on the other side...all na packaging

10 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by DMerciful(m): 9:34am On Jul 22, 2017
You are not getting the Op at all. you put urself in the shoes of the lady because you are a lady. His worry is that if a girl insist she wont have sex with me till marriage and then after they broke up she gave several men sex upto the point of getting pregnant then her no sex policy is not about chastity but because of him...that is his worry...y is it difficult to see that the girl does not really love him but loves his money now!
Sterope:
What is 'exposing' about having a stillbirth?

You are the one to judge. You are a bloody hypocrite! I wouldn't normally say this but most people would consider you more morally bankrupt than a person who chose to keep a baby. You aborted a baby for goodness sake. You have no standing to feel somehow or think anyhow of someone who chose to keep a baby.

And if it is sex that makes you think that she is exposed, you have personal issues you really need to deal with. You have no moral high ground to an opinion on this issue. Walk away if you can't take it. She definitely doesn't deserve to be subjected to your 'thoughts'.


24 Likes 3 Shares

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by DICKtator: 9:34am On Jul 22, 2017
What do you mean by "dark" ?

Like "dark" connotes negativity or something sinister.
Change that title to "White" secret

And no, it isn't "black"mail or "black" sheep,

It is "white"mail and "white" sheep. All meanings and references remains the same.
Kindly take note

grin grin grin grin

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by andyanders: 9:34am On Jul 22, 2017
madridguy:
From your write up I think she's trying to test you and see how you will react to her dark side too. She might as well be hurt to hear the dark side of you and maybe she cooked something up to see your reaction too.

My observation though.

Exactly. For me op, both of you can make a good family.

Op, Note this, no two perfect people on the face of this earth.Never see what has transpired between both of you as a disappointment, rather a way forward for a better tomorrow.

If you let her go now, you might regret it later if you eventually go get another woman as your mind would still be for her.

Forgive and accept her as she too has forgiven you as nobody is a saint.
Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by aprilwise(m): 9:35am On Jul 22, 2017
Everybody get secrets. nobody is a saint.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Austinoiz(m): 9:35am On Jul 22, 2017
Ma guy, u wanna go on with what?
Well, you guys are fvcktards, so go get ur 'share' before she misses another period.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Dolypson04(m): 9:35am On Jul 22, 2017
If I were you, I would query her why she has been denying me sex so far where giving it to another man/men. Like people said, she might be testing you to see your reaction but if this is not a test, then she must give convincing answer to my question if not, it's a no marriage for me.

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Svelte98(f): 9:36am On Jul 22, 2017
Nerdg:


I don't think she's trying to test me



My worry is why she had always refused me sex whereas she's this exposed. Could it be because of this she accepted my proposal?

So she's now "exposed" because she had sex with another guy and got pregnant for him? You don't know the circumstances surrounding that decision. The way i see it, you guys both made a mistake and are wise/mature enough to own up to it. Forgive each other, pray to God for forgiveness and continue with the marriage plans. She made a very big effort to tell you that. You guys should talk about it and continue with your lifes.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Mrkumareze(m): 9:36am On Jul 22, 2017
Young man, what you want is a home material not just a sex partner. What makes a wife is bigger than the abortion issue so you better examine her character not the past or her stories . The story of her dark side may be false , my wife once told me (before I proposed) she dated my distance cousin same way my cousin affirmed to it but they discovered how they 're related through maternal side which prevented them from marriage. All my affection diminished at the year it of that.I made my friendship with her to be casual cos of that, It took my almost a year to take a good step of proposing her for marriage and 3 months later we got married. Behold I was surprised that my wife was still a virgin. I personally advise u to go ahead with her, u 'll see reasons to be happy with her. Mind u, if u loose her it 'll take u time to find another love. Wife material is not like s*x material.

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by kevoh(m): 9:37am On Jul 22, 2017
I think the OP is the one to be critisized not the babe.. OP exorcise the demons within you, you are the problem not the babe. This one is not a topic to create a thread sef, Seun start collecting money from people before they create threads, maybe that way people will reflect properly before launching a thread. angry

2 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by SirVintageCock: 9:37am On Jul 22, 2017
DMerciful:
The issue here is the girl said no sex to him while dating but after their breakup, she was giving several men sex! does it mean she doesnt love him enuf to have sex with him like the others after him? she came back to him insisting no sex yet she has been quite loose. U decided to pick the part where you can protect the lady...hmmmm..women liberation!
No that he is well-to-do, its convenient for her to say yes....she is a manipulator!
She will never fvck that dude until he marries her as she knows that the dog always go back to his vomit. Both of 'em are sorry excuses of human species causing heartache for themselves by themselves. Imagine rejecting se.x then distributing it later and getting pregnant and stillbirthing in the process....then dude fvcking her neighbour and getting another chick pregnant and aborting and other fvcking sprees? They deserve each other and let no man put them asunder here

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:37am On Jul 22, 2017
Nerdg:


Did you read the part I said all our break-ups were because she refused sex with me. Why do she do this? My problem is why we had issues because of sex and she's getting it somewhere else?
Maybe the experience was traumatic for her. Sometimes things are not always that easy. If you want to let her go because she told u the truth, then leave her be.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by pacoson: 9:37am On Jul 22, 2017
She told u that Buhari is dead?
Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by frugal(m): 9:38am On Jul 22, 2017
She doesn't love you, she just wants to settle down with a regular guy who has always been there.

I wouldn't marry her. Why? She refused me sex severally, but gave it to other people to the extent of getting pregnant. This might sound a tad childish, but think deeply about this...Why does she really want to settle down with you?

Advice: give the relationship a year or two before you consider marriage.

25 Likes 1 Share

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by rosalieene(f): 9:38am On Jul 22, 2017
Nerdg:

Don't say what you don't know, I asked for advice and not your Masturbation on the thread

I wonder why you are just on about the sex!!

When you finally get married to her, you would do it and get tired.

if ur problem is sex, hasten the marriage process

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Austinoiz(m): 9:39am On Jul 22, 2017
madridguy:
From your write up I think she's trying to test you and see how you will react to her dark side too. She might as well be hurt to hear the dark side of you and maybe she cooked something up to see your reaction too.

My observation though.

Madridguy, na lie! The geh is a d#ck specialist and should be done same by this guy.
Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by dakeskese(m): 9:39am On Jul 22, 2017
Forgive and forget kawai! All that matters is love. Forget the 'deceit'.

Let love lead.
Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by lilyheaven: 9:40am On Jul 22, 2017
Sterope:
She may not have been ready initially. You were so desperate that you slept with another because of it, that is a red flag to refuse you many times over. However it does sound suspicious for her to refuse you again especially if she was sexually active in a preceding relationship before this one but then it is a bit understandable given your history.


Aren't you a Christian? Isn't premarital sex a sin?undecided. Keep your body holy for God. If you want sex, marry her. smiley



He wanted the lady to forgive him, and marry him, but he brought the laid case to nairaland, because he can't forgive.
Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by cutepaul(m): 9:40am On Jul 22, 2017
Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

chai this one dey pain......she refused u her puna and was busy distributing it upandan........kai.....op this one pain you well...

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Nobody: 9:40am On Jul 22, 2017
If you really love he, concentrate on your love for her and remember you have similar cases.
All the best.
Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by MrHonesty000(m): 9:40am On Jul 22, 2017
I know both of them are wrong, but if i was in his shoes i wont marry the girl.
She is an opportunist, after realizing the young man has a job he now fell for him, rmber the op couldn't hv had all this messy life if she gave in to his demands(which she gave to other guys anyway).
She is a selfish girl, all i can say is "its a trap run op run".

15 Likes

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by madridguy(m): 9:41am On Jul 22, 2017
Funny you grin

Austinoiz:


Madridguy, na lie! The geh is a d#ck specialist and should be done same by this guy.

1 Like

Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Frankyboy1(m): 9:41am On Jul 22, 2017
I pray you scroll down enough to read my message! Forget what kids are saying down there, I am a man who has been in the game long enough to advise you. DON'T MARRY HER! You have always loved her and she has been ur childhood crush and your kind of ideal woman all along, but she is not who you thought she was all this while! She is not and has never been in love with you neither is she naturally attracted to you! She likes you enough to MARRY you, cause as a woman you foot the bill and the time is right, but for her withstanding you sexually all these years,but was dishing it out to someone else and even insisted on keeping the child outside wedlock! Ogbeni that is the man she really loved! A woman that loves you and is sexually active,can't withstand ur advances for years even when she knows you were genuine about her! Find a girl who loves you for you, and has good moral standards,but her knees grow weak at ur touch or advances! If not you 're marrying a woman whom after a while ur sexual advances might even irritate her! Sexuality and raw chemistry is a big ingredient in marital relationship

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Re: She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? by Buharimustgo: 9:42am On Jul 22, 2017
Nerdg:
She told me of being pregnant and later had a stillbirth at the 7months.

The background.
I met her when we were teens and have always loved her. She refused me sex and along the line, her neighbor gave me (who is her relation). She learnt about this and we had our first break up.
We both got admission into different universities and couldn't see again.
We later met again and settled with a condition that there would be no sex. This didn't go down well with me and I called it off. This repeated and there was even a time I walked her out of my house because of this issue and didn't give her tfare. My house is like 1hr drive from where she lives.
The issue:
I love this girl to the extent that anytime I thought of getting married, she will come to mind.
Now I have a good job and she's done with school. I proposed to her and she accepted it.
Is about 3 months now, she came on my birthday 3 months ago. That was all. She doesn't come always because she stays with her elder brother and can't leave house just like that.

Note, we haven't had sex till now.

About 2 weeks ago, I told her about how I got a girl pregnant and we had to abort it and that since then I haven't been myself. That it pains me to this day. We talked about it and she was sorry over it.

Yesterday, we had a very deep discussion and she revealed to me that she had a relationship at school. They were together for 4yrs. I then asked her if she had ever missed her period. She said yes. But not to this school boyfriend but another man. She wanted to keep the pregnancy but her parents refused because the guy is not a good person. The guy wanted the pregnancy but her family didn't want the guy to marry her. She finally had a stillbirth at the 7th month.

I was stunned. I know she's not a virgin, she told me but I was confused. Sex had always been our problem and I never expected that she had experienced something like this. Now she asked me that she hope she won't regret telling me this. I told her no that she won't regret but I'm stunned.

Please should I still go on with this marriage?


Continue your discussion deeply pretend as if you are stunned,she still have more dark secret to reveal,just bear it man

1 Like

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