Football vs Sex.

1. Going to your bf/gf without being invited = OFFSIDE.

2. Dating a girl today and having sex on the same day = FREE-KICK.

3. Condom = GOALKEEPER

4. Condom breaks = PENALTY

5. Abortion = RED CARD

6. A girl with lots of energy = CAPTAIN

7. Having sex without a condom = OWN GOAL

8. Taking a lot of time without coming = MAN OF THE MATCH.

9.Banging 3 girls in a day = HAT-TRICK.

10. Having many chicks and banging all = MVP

11. Having sex with your ex = FRIENDLY MATCH

12. 8 years of sex without getting a child = ARSENAL

13. After 2 rounds, u request for more =EXTRA TIME.

14. Taking it gently when having sex = FAIR PLAY

15. Biting her n!pples = SUAREZ

16.Two legs on shoulder = THROWIN

17. Asking her 'how do you want it' = Taking instructions on the sideline.

18. A lady using pills after sex and later still got pregnant = DEFENSIVE ERROR

19.Girl being pregnant = GoOoOoOallllll and man running away= disqualification

20.Ur guy collect ur girl= True pass

21.Having sex with a girl..and your mum open d door= Injury

22.You and your girl break up= Game over

23. Girl tell u to stop= YELLOW CARD

24. Turning ur girlfriend to your wife= full time play

Hilarious

Ebayray:
Hilarious

Got me cracking

Funny