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How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. - Family (4) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. (5386 Views)

Should Marital Advice Be Taken From An Unmarried(single) Person / Why I Chose To Distance Myself From A Sibling / How Do You Cope If Married To Someone You Don't Love? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by EfemenaXY: 9:48am On Sep 02, 2017
Ishilove:
I can't understand why most people don't read between the lines. The OPs tone is that of resentment. His sister is a terror at home and he is wishing she'd just get married and leave the house for them. If her attitude was better, the OP will not be here complaining about his sister's marital status because there are so many older single ladies living with their parents.

The long and short of it is his sister's attitude sucks, is giving his parents a headache and he wishes she'd get married and get the hell out of the house for them so they'll peace of mind.

His choice of words are extremely judgemental and quite frankly, they rankle.

He obviously isn't married and doesn't know the first thing about marriage - so he's in no position to school her on why she should get hitched.

And yes, her marital status is definitely none of his business.

3 Likes

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by EfemenaXY: 9:49am On Sep 02, 2017
baby124:
OP,
Your sisters marital status is not your business. What she does with her life is not your business. The pictures she posts on Facebook is not your business. You seem to have a lot of time on your hands to be minding other people's business. Are you jobless? Please engage your mind and go and get married if marriage is what you came to do in life. Leave your sister alone. If she has issues with your parents, they are her parents too. They will resolve it. Get busy and get a life of your own.

Well said! kiss

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Ishilove: 9:53am On Sep 02, 2017
EfemenaXY:


His choice of words are extremely judgemental and quite frankly, they rankle.

He obviously isn't married and doesn't know the first thing about marriage - so he's in no position to school her on why she should get hitched.

And yes, her marital status is definitely none of his business.
I didn't perceive judgement in his tone. What I perceived was exasperation and resentment.

Difficult siblings can drive you to the edge of psychosis, you know. Trust me, I speak from first hand experience grin
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by EfemenaXY: 10:00am On Sep 02, 2017
Mindfulness:


I know but I wanted it to be soon, very soon. cheesy




I love it too. It hasn't always been like that. wink



I do remember grin but I had no doubt you would still make it and make it BIG. I know what you are capable of. I have known you for some time now and nobody is as self-disciplined as you are. Procrastination makes way for inspiration so it is not a bad thing. wink

Congratulations sis!
I hope you celebrated it and rewarded yourself? smiley

Lol! Thanks. Yes, I should do as it's been a string of positive results over the last two weeks.

Re: celebration - yes! But there's only so much one can celebrate na otherwise I'd go broke. grin
Nonetheless, we're really chuffed. It's been an avalanche of positivity born from months of absolute dedication (and I daresay micromanagement - but that's me all over).

Best holiday ever sis. kiss kiss kiss

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 10:44am On Sep 02, 2017
EfemenaXY:


Lol! Thanks. Yes, I should do as it's been a string of positive results over the last two weeks.

Re: celebration - yes! But there's only so much one can celebrate na otherwise I'd go broke. grin
Nonetheless, we're really chuffed. It's been an avalanche of positivity born from months of absolute dedication (and I daresay micromanagement - but that's me all over).

Best holiday ever sis. kiss kiss kiss

My heart rejoices with you. I love good news and I love to see you happy and satisfied and proud and relaxed. kiss kiss
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by baby124: 2:04pm On Sep 02, 2017
EfemenaXY:


Well said! kiss
Mena, how far?

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 7:06pm On Sep 02, 2017
Daeylar:


Hello smiley



@ the bolded why is this an issue for you?



@ the bolded how is it 'if I may use your words' telling on you guys?


That will help us to give you a better advice
because marriage is not an issue people jump into,

Well it's an issue for me because I love her and I can tell that she too isn't happy.

It's telling on us guys because we want our sister to be settled. Despite all the things ladies here are saying, if all things were equal, by now she would have tied the knot. I'm just worried that's all. My immediate elder brother and I have even slowed down on anything called relationship for now so as not to put pressure on her or make her feel sad. I'm just worried that's all.
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 7:08pm On Sep 02, 2017
ImaIma1:


Don't be worried for her. She will calm down. Besides, there is a man for her...one that has her mumu button. She will be fine. Live your own lives and forget her. Just put her in prayers cos i dont think there is much you can do for her

Thank you very much. Every lady here seems to be attacking me as if I hate my own sister.

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 7:09pm On Sep 02, 2017
1Sharon:


her being single gives them headache?

Does she live with ur parents?
Yes
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 7:11pm On Sep 02, 2017
smiley
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 7:12pm On Sep 02, 2017
Thanks guys. Everyone though not all has been helpful. I've been able to get something from the advices and attacks.
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Humanistme: 8:20pm On Sep 02, 2017
Motuke01:
Thanks guys. Everyone though not all has been helpful. I've been able to get something from the advices and attacks.

does she have a job?
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by EfemenaXY: 10:42pm On Sep 02, 2017
baby124:

Mena, how far?

My dear, I dey oh!

You nko? Happy New month smiley
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by loshybab(m): 11:11pm On Sep 02, 2017
Daeylar:


Still being foolish and still so arrogant in your foolishness

I hope you get help soon
Nah!
being foolish is when you resort to using insulting words before you can drive your point.



Lady! I'm still in the sweet Sallah mood pls and no one is gonna ruin that for me,not even you...
so, just swerve,face front and keep moving.

pele ooo!
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by loshybab(m): 11:15pm On Sep 02, 2017
dangotesmummy:
when you know she's not a robot and she's an adult, leave her to make her decision na.abi ewoni pepefuru
An adult dt doesn't knw when to act and react,give marital life a chance.....


is dt one even an Adult. mi o se pepefuru kankan-an ooo
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by dangotesmummy: 8:37am On Sep 03, 2017
loshybab:

An adult dt doesn't knw when to act and react,give marital life a chance.....


is dt one even an Adult. mi o se pepefuru kankan-an ooo
why is another person's matter paining you more than your own.awon agberu eleru sori,fatiwon dani.face your own front too because you have your own issues like every other person

1 Like

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by Nobody: 8:45am On Sep 03, 2017
Motuke01:


Well it's an issue for me because I love her and I can tell that she too isn't happy.

It's telling on us guys because we want our sister to be settled. Despite all the things ladies here are saying, if all things were equal, by now she would have tied the knot. I'm just worried that's all. My immediate elder brother and I have even slowed down on anything called relationship for now so as not to put pressure on her or make her feel sad. I'm just worried that's all.

And what makes you think that a relationship will make her happy?
Have you not seen unhappy relationships / marriages?

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by loshybab(m): 1:56pm On Sep 03, 2017
dangotesmummy:
why is another person's matter paining you more than your own.awon agberu eleru sori,fatiwon dani.face your own front too because you have your own issues like every other person
....more than my own!
that phrase from your statement is laughable. You would have seen me dealing with my own topic rather than posting on someone else's,if there was any aorta of truth in what you've written up there.


if I had any issue to post on this platform, I'd appreciate if ur likes stay off it.
thank you!
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by dangotesmummy: 2:10pm On Sep 03, 2017
loshybab:

....more than my own!
that phrase from your statement is laughable. You would have seen me dealing with my own topic rather than posting on someone else's,if there was any aorta of truth in what you've written up there.


if I had any issue to post on this platform, I'd appreciate if ur likes stay off it.
thank you!
see this jester grin

I'm referring to you and the likes of op who like to leave your own issues unattended to and now be pocknosing into other people's issues and be criticizing them based on their own marital status as if your life is all perfect and issue free

2 Likes

Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by loshybab(m): 10:29am On Sep 04, 2017
dangotesmummy:
see this jester grin
You see wah I meant,can't pass a point without insulting.....kwantinu!

I'm referring to you and the likes of op who like to leave your own issues unattended to and now be pocknosing into other people's issues and be criticizing them based on their own marital status as if your life is all perfect and issue free
[/quote]
nah!
you're getting this misconstrued. the person the Op is referring to isnt just any person, she is his sister.
Nkan to ba kan oju ti kan imu na
Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by onyegwu(m): 2:33pm On Sep 04, 2017
Dcholeric:

I was always having problems with my dad while I was living with him.
don't come back home 10pm+...cause I would have lock my gate.
don't bring girls to my house for sex.
don't bring guys and drinks to my house.
go get a job and stop depending on me for everything.
these are few of why we always quarrel.

then he will say I can't risk my whole family by leaving my gate open because you want to stay late night.
I can't risk my other children because you want to bring bad boys and drinks to my house which will leave my household vulnerable to theft, bad example, cultism ....
you can't bring girls to have sex in my house.. you are not married to any one of them and whatever problem that comes out of it will come to my house first ..
he will conclude by saying if you want to live the way you want, please leave my house or if you break any of these rules again and constitute nuisance in my house I will call the police ...
and he did call the police a couple of times admist heated arguments.....I was tired of always being the one to quarrel in my house so I obeyed most rules as patiently as I could and I found out I was living peacefully, it also became my habit everywhere I go (having to be more patient and calm), and yes it helped in my relationship with opposite sex.

I finally got my own apartment and guess what!...I couldn't misbehave the way would've want to...thanks to my dad....and moreover there is too much responsibility living alone..one can't just keep toying around.

she has to obey rules under her fathers house (excluding marital issues) or get her apartment.... if she wants to continue toying with men...posting pics 24yr/7 on fb, no problem. but if she wants to remain in her fathers house and constitute nuisance by constant quarrelling, then that is highly irresponsible considering her position and age.
You said it all Brother.

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Re: How Do You Cope With An Unmarried Sibling. by dangotesmummy: 3:53pm On Sep 04, 2017
loshybab:

You see wah I meant,can't pass a point without insulting.....kwantinu!

I'm referring to you and the likes of op who like to leave your own issues unattended to and now be pocknosing into other people's issues and be criticizing them based on their own marital status as if your life is all perfect and issue free

nah!
you're getting this misconstrued. the person the Op is referring to isnt just any person, she is his sister.
Nkan to ba kan oju ti kan imu na
*yawns*

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