Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? - Romance - Nairaland
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| Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by 4evaYung(m): 11:36pm On Nov 18, 2018 |
A friend of mine who is quiet and very reserved shared her concerns with me. She said her husband no longer likes to take her out on visits to see friends. The husband complains she is too quiet and does not engage in conversation when they visit friends. Fast track back, she said the first time he saw her, these attributes (quiet and reserve) are the very ones that he liked about her among other things. I've heard about guys unhappy or have lost interest in their wives due to certain features they possess, the irony is, these were the same features that draw them to the woman. These could be big breast, big bum, intelligence (yea, i know of a guy who quarrels with his wife often because according to him she acts as if she knows too much) So for those who are single and searching, look for the substance in a woman not shallow things that will turn her against you later. In conclusion let God guides your heart and leads you. For those who have been married for over 5years, share what draws you to your partner and how it is today 4 Likes |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by YOUNGELDER1(m): 12:28am On Nov 19, 2018 |
A friend or your wife ?  |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by 4evaYung(m): 7:32pm On Nov 19, 2018 |
YOUNGELDER1:I want to believe you went to school and you know the diff betw the word a friend and wife.. |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 11:24pm On Nov 19, 2018 |
Surprisingly, I'm like her too. I don't like to engage in conversations I'm not invited to. I'll rather you indulge me, and I'll answer. I prefer to listen than talk. I don't blame her, she's a great listener. Sadly, our wanton society have held this as a norm of being unintelligent, or a so-called attitudinal problem. Let her be. No one has to manipulate certain lifestyles which one finds contented with to make another happy. We've wrongly been debased. Nothing is absolutely wrong with her. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by Nobody: 6:10am On Nov 20, 2018 |
While he doesn't like the fact that his wife is a listener instead of a chatterbox, some men will kill for a wife that is quiet and doesn't engage in unnecessary conversations when she hang out with them, if she talks much now, he will still say she talks much and reveal too much to his friends. 4 Likes |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by IamPlato(m): 9:02am On Nov 20, 2018 |
... Why Not Involve Her In The Conversation. The Quiet Ones Have Alot Of Sensible Things To Say but You Just Have Make Them Talk by Involving Them 1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by chiommy123(f): 9:49am On Nov 20, 2018 |
I also think she's respecting her husband by not involving herself in guys talk and allowing them discuss. Everyone talks even introverts. Introverts are talkatives where they're very comfortable 2 Likes |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by babyfaceafrica: 9:52am On Nov 20, 2018 |
people and their love for noisemakers sha.....is it a crime for someone to be observant and taciturn?..... live and let's live abeg |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by Uglymugg: 10:08am On Nov 20, 2018 |
I H A T E Q U I E T P E O P L E. S I N I S T E R A S F U C K |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 10:40am On Nov 20, 2018 |
Uglymugg: No one cares about your orientation.  1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by megareal: 10:53am On Nov 20, 2018 |
The secret in marriage is to find a middle ground. You can't always be quiet all the time nor be a talkative too. Her extreme quietness is a misrepresentation which others will not understand. They may feel she is too proud or that they are unimportant. She should make a conscious effort to be friendly, to talk and to look interested in what others have to say. I had to practically drag the social side of my husband out of him. 3 Likes |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by Uglymugg: 10:57am On Nov 20, 2018 |
UyaiIncomparabl:F U C K Q U I E T P E O P L E. A L W A Y S T H I N K I N G A B O U T S O M E D I A B O L I C A L S H I T. A N D F U C K Y O U F O R B E I N G A Q U I E T P E R S O N. 2 Likes |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by Lewandowski9(m): 11:00am On Nov 20, 2018 |
4evaYung:
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| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by Apina(m): 12:34pm On Nov 20, 2018 |
He could simply bring her into whatever conversation instead of complaining |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 1:45pm On Nov 20, 2018 |
Uglymugg:  . Monkey. |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by Uglymugg: 2:06pm On Nov 20, 2018 |
UyaiIncomparabl: Pls gibs me breast milks.
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| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by akaahs(m): 2:50pm On Nov 20, 2018 |
I always fansy those in the health sector, I always admire and hope to settle with someone from there. So help me God 1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by abdeiz(m): 4:13pm On Nov 20, 2018 |
1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by 4evaYung(m): 4:06am On Nov 21, 2018 |
UyaiIncomparabl:I get what you mean but it shouldn't be to the extent that you just keep quiet throughout a conversation and not chip in especially with family friends. |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by 4evaYung(m): 4:11am On Nov 21, 2018 |
IamPlato:I absolutely agree with you because I found her to be very intelligent |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by 4evaYung(m): 4:20am On Nov 21, 2018 |
megareal:I cannot agree with you more and that sentence "I had to practically drag the social side of my husband out of him" sums up the desire of her husband. Am wondering though why you did that? was his quietness affecting your marriage or was it boring the relationship. |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by megareal: 12:29pm On Nov 21, 2018 |
4evaYung:It wasn't, I was quite comfortable with it. I observed folks who had conversations with him always ended up looking embarrassed because you will be lucky of he answers at all. So in a 15min discussion, one could end up with just an OK from him. Funny thing is he has it in him to be extremely sociable, he just preferred being reticent. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 9:19pm On Nov 21, 2018 |
4evaYung: Mine is worse. People even call me proud because of that.  I simply cannot engage in a conversation I'm not invited to. If he really wants her voice to be heard, let him ask her or involve her and see if she wouldn't answer. |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by blackjack21(m): 1:13am On Nov 22, 2018 |
Complaining about about someone's gentle quietness is twice as rude as telling someone that they talk too much. When people remark on my quietness, I used to reply then with a very subtle 'go f*uck yourself' that they would be looking so forward to the journey. But now that I have taken a lot of interest in psychology, I realized that people (especially those why acquainted with you) read too much silence differently, for example, you're : angry, anxious, sad, etc. Those who are just meeting you for the first time might cut (you're just shay) some slack. In the case of your friend's husband, he might just distressed that be keep on asking him if everything is okay in his house, with his marriage, because his wife is quite,she must be sad. And he would be thinking 'people think that I'm treating her bad'. You see how dangerous that can be? Please tell to sit down and have a quality discussion with her spouse about the issue. I hope this helps. 1 Like |
| Re: Help! Is It Blessing Or A Curse? by 4evaYung(m): 10:52am On Nov 22, 2018 |
UyaiIncomparabl:Dont you think asking her would be putting her on the spot especially for somebody who is not comfortable speaking in public |
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