I am a 23 yr old under G, i can rightly say i've got a fair share of natural endowments, relatively popular and easily known wherever I find myself, but recently found out to my dismay that i have nobody that i can call FRIEND in the true sense of the word. I believe am not in anyway selfish because I go out of my way to help people who need it around me (strangers inclusive) even when doing so atimes amount to self deprivation.
I dont ask for much from people, and humble (i dont just say it, people do) I have often found myself a confidant of others and dont hide my feelings from people. But even with all these i still do not have someone to call friend, could it be something I have yet to notice about myself ? Please help !

im sorry but i dont find this any romantic. . . 

At least you go school. Your English no bad at all 

Sorry, just talking ma mind. With a thread like this and a post length like the first, all I expected to see was the perfect recipe for English disaster (as is the trend is these parts of NL) but I was wrong this once. 

As for your no friends issue, I can't offer any help as I live a lifestyle that can't really accommodate physical friends. Being a geek sucks donkey balls, all you got as friends are machines and cartoon/anime/manga characters. .

so many "i am lonely" threads on nl



hmmm

Ur wicked,stingy and ugly.i know you. The only option is to buy urself some friends. Gud luck.

@dual core, i wish I can become a geek myself atleast u get to know the machines and they appreciate u in return,
@5p1naz, no it is not romantic, only painful.
@ kenis, maybe if I had the money

chidi-marc:

I am a 23 yr old under G, i can rightly say i've got  a fair share of natural endowments, relatively popular and easily known wherever I find myself, but recently found out to my dismay that i have nobody that i can call FRIEND in the true sense of the word.  I believe am not in anyway selfish because I go out of my way to help people who need it around me (strangers inclusive) even when doing so atimes amount to self deprivation.
I dont ask for much from people, and humble (i dont just say it, people do) I have often found myself a confidant of others and dont hide my feelings from people. But even with all these i still do not have someone to call friend, could it be something I have yet to notice about myself ? Please help !

what exactly do you mean by you have no one you can call a friend? you are popular and are easily recognized everywhere you go, people confide in you and you do the same. what is it you would like in a friend that you don't already have in these people around you? is it that they avoid you, or that they aren't friendly enough, or that you don't think of them as your ideal friends?

could it be that you're harsh or blunt with people. are you standoffish or bossy or too opinionated? do you react badly to criticism? people tend to avoid confrontational people, and if you react badly to criticsm it's unlikely that people would want to give you helpful advice.

i think the best way to know what the problem is would be talking to the people around you. one of those who confide in you but aren't real friends. ask them if there's something about you that keeps them away from you. sometimes we need other people to point out our flaws, so you need to really listen to what they say. even if you don't agree, the fact is you're probably giving out some negative vibes (or people are feeling something different from what you're giving out), and you need them to point it out.

@Poster,
If your definition of "friend' means the opposite sex then i rather suggest you find a solution to that but if you mean same sex and general peeps then i will tell you not to get bothered.

A thousand and one people pass through the same situation everyday.

Your peers might just be envious about your being popular and generousity skills.

Be yourself , engage yourself in profitable activities.

Please only make friends with people that can impact positivity and beneficial value to your life and don't make friends just for the sake of one.

@GL,
maybe it is the need to feel identified with a group. I hardly insist on my opinion and often allow people have their way and dictate how we relate, i like to feel in control (of situations & self not others) ,I welcome criticisms & never waste time in apologizing for any wrong pointed out to me. Sometimes people think that I am more comfortable that I actually am, may be due to my disposition, i mean material-wise. (is everything all about money ?) One thing is, i am always conscious not to take more than I can afford to give, could that be a problem

tpiah:

so many "i am lonely" threads on nl



hmmm

Dont mind them jari.

Are u looking for a boyfriend or a lover?
please be specific.[color=#990000][/color]

Am not looking for friends, just wondering why i dont have much friends

RESULT: "the poster is normal"
OBSERVATION: " the poster will soon have Many USELESS i mean useful people around him called FRIENDS"
ADVICE: Be careful and enjoy your current stress-free status.
What are friends for if not to inconvenience one another?

@richy, thanks for the assessment, but not having friends, you think that is normal ?

friends arent that hard to come by.

if you feel you need some, then start getting them.


not having friends simply shows you're maybe a very picky person.

or just need a break.

however, if you feel it's a symptom of some deeper problem, then by all means get help, either by having friends or seeing a healthcare practitioner.

How old r yu?

Maybe u haven't found that friend or friends yet don't worry.

@tpiah, help is exactly what I seek here
@pweety, I said 23.
Friends can be company, but not all company is friend

Man, I can feel u. I was like this way back then till my Dad sat me down & told me the advant & disadvant of friends. somehow I found out that pple call me friend but I dont regard them such. well today I have a few folks I call friends & they understand my need for space; u know the "trees of the forest dont stand under each other shadow" thing.
it technical boils down to choosing one of those close guys u feel comfortable with & reciprocate their gestures. they vist u, u vist them. they call u, u call back.
try this, its just a little effort on ur part. ciao

@Switosman, noted and welcome

@Switosman, noted and welcome

chidi-marc:

I am a 23 yr old under G, i can rightly say i've got  a fair share of natural endowments, relatively popular and easily known wherever I find myself, but recently found out to my dismay that i have nobody that i can call FRIEND in the true sense of the word.  I believe am not in anyway selfish because I go out of my way to help people who need it around me (strangers inclusive) even when doing so atimes amount to self deprivation.
I dont ask for much from people, and humble (i dont just say it, people do) I have often found myself a confidant of others and dont hide my feelings from people. But even with all these i still do not have someone to call friend, could it be something I have yet to notice about myself ? Please help !

First, you posted this in the wrong section but after reading your post, i felt i should reply.

Im facing similar situation. You don't owe anybody friendship. Like i usually say, i choose my friends, my friends don't choose me. As it is, i don't regard them as friends. All you have to do is be yourself and don't expect anything in return. When u meet a true friend, u will naturally feel happy.

Take the advise of switosman.

Thanks, bt how do u tell if they regard regard u as friend when u dont regard them as one ?
Are we not mistaking company 4 true friendship ?, , and then who is a friend ?