A friend in UK was asking me how he can meet Nigerian born Nigerians in UK for a serious relationship. He says his only chance is from church but he doesn't like anyone from church. He is also not the party type. And he complained the people he sees are British born Nigerians. He lives outside London. Please do you have anytips for him?

Living outside London can also mean living in Nigeria I don’t want to believe someone that is living in th UK will still come and ask us how to meet Nigerians ladies living in UK for a relationship......Oga tell us your plans

Ayhomes:
Living outside London can also mean living in Nigeria I don’t want to believe someone that someone living in UK will still come and ask us how to meet Nigerians ladies living in UK for a relationship......Oga tell us your plans

He said the issue isn't Nigerians per say - according to him there are many Nigerians where he stays but they are effectively briticized. He wants a Nigerian just like himself dats his main issue.... he also complained over there it's a bit harder for him to meet ppl outside of church every sunday.

Abeg tell your friend to come himself. Then and only then we may help him.

Goldenventures:
Abeg tell your friend to come himself. Then and only then we may help him.

Okay il tell him to open an account here

BigBashiru:
A friend in UK was asking me how he can meet Nigerian born Nigerians in UK for a serious relationship. He says his only chance is from church but he doesn't like anyone from church. He is also not the party type. And he complained the people he sees are British born Nigerians. He lives outside London. Please do you have anytips for him?

He should change his church...........

Tell him to try that Ashimolowo's warehouse in Hackney(or wherever it is now, I think they've moved) on any of their special church service/event days and he'll see all sorts of Nigerian beings there to choose from, trust me.

Cyberknight:
Tell him to try that Ashimolowo's warehouse in Hackney(or wherever it is now, I think they've moved) on any of their special church service/event days and he'll see all sorts of Nigerian beings there to choose from, trust me.

They have moved to kent now o ...... London Olympics 2012 forced purchased that hackney site ....... Paid him beta moni .......

Nah massive warehouse dey kent now ..........

It is hard generally in uk to find nigerian born especially outside london. His best bet would be through social media and besides Nigerian ladies in uk are way smarter than the men in terms of claiming benefits by deliberately divorcing their husbands. Thats why before I came, I got married although I like white chick though. I would have married one

jesmond3945:
It is hard generally in uk to find nigerian born especially outside london. His best bet would be through social media and besides Nigerian ladies in uk are way smarter than the men in terms of claiming benefits by deliberately divorcing their husbands. Thats why before I came, I got married although I like white chick though. I would have married one

Well said. Truth be told, had I stayed back in the UK I wouldn't have married a Nigerian woman at all, whether someone already there or an imported one. The rates of the split-ups referred to above is worrisome. In the end we lean towards people from home because we want to raise children with at least some of the values we hold dear from back home, which we hope will guide them in the new world we and they are living in (and this generally works for the Indians very well indeed).

However, short of our being able to import families wholesale (again like the Indians and Pakis seem to be able to do), my feeling is that a 2 - person family unit from a different cultural background hasn't got much hope against today's highly fluid moral and cultural environment in the western world (gradually spreading back here as well too). If I were in the UK and unmarried today, I would not really bother about the ethnicity/race of any woman I was forming a relationship with - I don't think seeking out a Nigerian from back home is necessarily any guarantee of some stability, the way it was for our parents' generation. It takes a whole lot more than that - the deliberate immersion in culture to make the children understand what's expected of them, the occasional trips back home to see where "home" is, meet the family and understand why your parents fled and why you should make the most of your own opportnities, etc.

He can try online dating also, I think that's what works best.

BigBashiru:
A friend in UK was asking me how he can meet Nigerian born Nigerians in UK for a serious relationship. He says his only chance is from church but he doesn't like anyone from church. He is also not the party type. And he complained the people he sees are British born Nigerians. He lives outside London. Please do you have anytips for him?

Let him join InterNations or any Professional network for Expatriates.

If your friend is a good man - a strong man who likes to dance and is not afraid of gay lifestyle you may inform him I am available for marriage.

No smokers though sorry...

Cyberknight:


Well said. Truth be told, had I stayed back in the UK I wouldn't have married a Nigerian woman at all, whether someone already there or an imported one. The rates of the split-ups referred to above is worrisome. In the end we lean towards people from home because we want to raise children with at least some of the values we hold dear from back home, which we hope will guide them in the new world we and they are living in (and this generally works for the Indians very well indeed).

However, short of our being able to import families wholesale (again like the Indians and Pakis seem to be able to do), my feeling is that a 2 - person family unit from a different cultural background hasn't got much hope against today's highly fluid moral and cultural environment in the western world (gradually spreading back here as well too). If I were in the UK and unmarried today, I would not really bother about the ethnicity/race of any woman I was forming a relationship with - I don't think seeking out a Nigerian from back home is necessarily any guarantee of some stability, the way it was for our parents' generation. It takes a whole lot more than that - the deliberate immersion in culture to make the children understand what's expected of them, the occasional trips back home to see where "home" is, meet the family and understand why your parents fled and why you should make the most of your own opportnities, etc.

Well I fed this point back to him, the issue isn't that He isn't open to other races, he has tried that but it didn't work.... he thinks it's much easier to get on with and form a relationship with someone who is from the same culture, understands pigeon English, understands same things instead of him struggling to understand British jokes etc.

BigBashiru:

Well I fed this point back to him, the issue isn't that He isn't open to other races, he has tried that but it didn't work.... he thinks it's much easier to get on with and form a relationship with someone who is from the same culture, understands pigeon English, understands same things instead of him struggling to understand British jokes etc.

I sympathise with his inability to make relationships with people from other backgrounds work, but then you see that the problem is his and he has to work on that. Simply put he needs to try harder. Judging them by their own standards and not his would be a very good first step. If he intends to make the UK his permanent home, then he has to open himself up to its cultural influences and realise that the days of creating unique spaces are almost gone.

I well understand the desire to partner with someone from one's own background; it plays out here too when we prefer to marry people from our own tribes. However, settlement in a new environment makes things harder especially as I would never advise anyone to bring over a partner from home - their stories are now too many and too scary.

As previously stated, there was a time when the UK(mainly London, then Bradford) was dotted with almost homogenous communities of immigrants, mainly the Asians (Indians, Pakis, Bangladeshis and Sri Lankans) who lived almost in their own worlds, with their British-born children serving as liaisons between them and the outside world and with these communities being refreshed almost daily by new arrivals which enabled them to retain this unique character and raise their children almost as dual-acculturated citizens in a foreign land.

Now, the new stream of arrivals that was able to come in almost unchecked in those days has been cut down to a trickle, so the pool of potential Nigerian - born and raised female partners that your friend is seeking has shrunk drastically, leaving aside their suitability for long-term relationships.

So while I wish your friend every success in finding someone that meets his requirements, he must work harder on integrating himself into his new environment.

Ur friend or you?