You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls - Romance - Nairaland
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| You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by etiqutte: 7:39am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Dating a girl for almost three years now but she's fond of talking to other guys or old men in the past as she always say.. I am just teasing them to get money from them that's all. I trusted her and i have never caught her sleeping with any of them. I told her to stop but before she finally accepted to stop we quarreled several time and i even reported her to her mom. Just to satisfy her I took the responsibility upon myself to take care of her and provide all of her basic needs. She seems very strict with sex the missionary style is always her choice still yet i endured with her cos i love her so much. I noticed i am getting tired of the sex life cos its very boring to me. Till now it never occurred to me to have side chicks. Anytime i actually bring issues with her sex life up. She always say that i am selfish and not yet married to her. She always say all i wanted her for was sex. Just for that reason i stopped bringing up that conversation cos i love her. I got engaged with her for so many reason. She have supported me at some particular time i was financially down. She took me out of depression, she has been my confidant and most of all manage my finances so well than i do myself. Apart from that there just so many amazing things i might not share. I genuinely love her I have to shelter her in my own house cos she lives by herself and does not seems to have her parent or anyone to support her. So i took it upon myself to let her live with me which i barely allow in my past relationships. Sent her back to school to complete her higher diploma program. Since where i live is close to her school premises. So she always go to school from my house. The issue now is that i noticed recently she have started talking to someone again.. my major concern is that what is the essence of having this uneccesary conversation with other men. I lately felt may be because i don't give her enough attention and also have to let her know how serious i am with our relationship which was among the reason i proposed to her just for her to know how much i love her. One day we went to her bank of which i know nearly all the staffs in that bank cos my uncle was once thier MD before he retired. Would you believe that on that day we went together i was outside the bank before her . One of the female cashier told her one of her co-workers would like to have her contact. She told me, also claimed she did not give him her number and even if at all he want to get the number she use to register with the bank. Its on her abandoned phone which is barely switched on or available. There was another day we are at the bank.The female cashier jokingly said we are taking your wife from you. But i didn't take that to heart cos it was more like a joke to me. Now her exam is approaching. I allowed her to stay with her friend for few weeks until the exams end. The same banker she told me about they have been talking while she was eith her friends reading for exams. We were at the living room i noticed a number kept calling she did not pick up. I know of some of her pals that are guys and i never for once question their friendship. I am not that kind of person that don't want her with male friends. But if she have to avoid calls in my presence. If you are in my shoes will that not call for any suspicion. Just for few days she left and came around to cook and help with my laundry. She have started having calls and chats. I am worried about that been a distraction, Someone who is suppose to be reading where will you have the time for uneccesary conversations, apart from been jealous. I told her i know the new number calling is from the bank. I asked if the person is motivating you and why did she like having unnecessary conversations. She told me he is motivating her then i wonder what sort of motivation it is during preparation for exams that js 2 weeks ahead. She said he actually talked to her and her friends to read and prepare well for exam also told her to cultivate the habit of reading alone. I am the kind man she would never allow to keep any female friend. I asked what did she always derive from such act she told me just to have someone to chat with.. I want to know if this kind of relationship is healthy for me and if yes give me possible suggestion to go about it. |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Nobody: 7:48am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Bro, that your girl hasn't tasted life and she's curious. That which you guard jealously isn't yours trust me. At that stage in her life, she needs freedom to make life choices and you're a stumbling block. Here is the deal, continue guarding her and mess yourself up emotionally or let her willingly choose you or not choose you as her man and have peace of mind. Your choice big man. 23 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Nobody: 7:50am On Mar 17, 2019 |
MajorJeffery:gbam |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by seniorgozman(m): 7:57am On Mar 17, 2019 |
The relationship is not healthy at all, if you want to know her true colour, give her space and watch her from far. The best advice I will give you now is to start looking for another babe 6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by lilmax(m): 7:57am On Mar 17, 2019 |
lol see my man being manipulated with words like "someone to chat with" "friends" "selfish"  she's still in hoe phase, no offense pack yourself and get a matured girl who doesn't have time to hoe this is guys problem, you guys tolerate crap 8 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by ghettochild4u(m): 8:00am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Its obvious u r clipping her wings plus missionary will be d only position u will experience in ur marriage.. U ready for that?? My friend love comes with respect. She doesn't respect u... So make I say... She don't love u enough.... Ur girl seem d type that is easily cajoled... Don't be surprised banker go bleep her n even motivate her to give him Doggy... Make I advice, do this.. Tell her u want out of d relationship cos of her ways n see if she wont be happy but at first pretend to be sad u won't out... U been seeing signs yet u want nairalanders to tell u what to do... U simply not man enough o Oh maybe u worried if she goes u won't find a girl like her,? Yes u won't find one like her.. U will find one who will respect u, listen to whatever u tell u dont like her doing n even give u kama sutra 6 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Shelumiel: 8:03am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Do away with her ...it is best for you peace of mind . |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by CosmicPhoenix: 8:07am On Mar 17, 2019 |
so you went from dating yourself to getting engaged to yourself,it is obvious the girl doesnt respect you and is only using you to pass time.she wont let you keep female friends but can keep male friends,you have lost control of the relationship already. E go be like film when she leave you marry that banker,Better dump her,there are many fishes in the ocean. USE YOUR HEAD 2 Likes
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| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by donbachi(m): 8:07am On Mar 17, 2019 |
She brought you out of depression and she supported you financially...so,for that reason she must send you back to recession with endless depression...do you know how many women that left men that stood by them when no one was there.and married men out of the blues...don't marry her out of pity.your happiness first. 12 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by ShenTeh(m): 8:08am On Mar 17, 2019 |
What I see here is a pity party and two, small balls. She is very comfortable and like MajorJeffery said, she feels caged. All those 'older men' you claimed she stopped calling, she simply grew smarter on handling them without your knowledge. She left your house, which you earlier claim is close to her school, to stay with another friend to read. I am here ROTF! Grow. Itemize -I mean write them down if necessary, the things you want her to improve on or change. Start by asking her clearly the things she thinks you are not doing right. Be reasonable o. Make a commitment to improve and be deliberate about improving. Them discuss firmly your own points and give timelines. Please begin to 'browse' for option 2. There are too many good girls to begin to whine and ache on one frigid one. When we say leave small girls alone, una no go hear. People will probably accuse you here of insecurity. My brother, there's nothing wrong with that. Plan to move on. Start slowly so your heart can take it. 'No Road Ahead' with a big U-Turn sign is all that this relationship symbol says. 5 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by daddytime(m): 8:14am On Mar 17, 2019 |
That babe don see you finish come sabi your mumu button join. The earlier you save yourself the stress of I sent her to school and proposed to her bla bla bla the better for you. You'd better dumped that stray dog and move on with your life because she'd never change even if you ended up wifing her. The other styles she refuses to give you on bed are being taken by the guys outside trust me on this. A sneaky LovePeddler that girl is..pardon my language but that's the honest truth. Motivation my left blokos...he must have been motivating her to pull her pants...ashawo girl.. The babe is sourcing for anyone more comfy than you are and the moment she finds anyone to buy into her sneaky bizzy you'd be history guy. She's a material and money hungry girl...make one yahoo boy catch am first you no go see her brake light again. If you were in my location I'd have helped you reveal her true colours with a set up and her legs spread wide...trust me 1 Like |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Akinbahm(m): 8:15am On Mar 17, 2019 |
MajorJeffery:Abandon this message at your own peril... |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by PrimadonnaO(f): 8:17am On Mar 17, 2019 |
I don't see any serious problem here. First, I think this co-habiting will be the very death of your relationship. In my opinion, this is where all the problems you two are experiencing stems from. You've prematurely put the relationship in a place it shouldn't be at. ONLY married people should live together full time. There's a psychological preparedness that comes with that. Right now, your babe is scared of "see-finish." Deep down, she knows that your living together is not the best option... she's trying to hold on to the last bit of dignity she has left. That missionary thing she's always doing. It's deliberate. She doesn't want to let it all go. In her head, she's withholding privileges because she knows she's already allowing you too much of it... privileges that should have been exclusive to only a husband. I believe she still loves you and values your relationship... but all of these is tethering on the edge. She's talking to all those other guys because she wants to feel wanted. An average girl thrives on validation from men... she likes to know that her "market is still selling." She doesn't want to feel tied down when she's not. They give her money and gifts now and then... it makes her feel less financially dependent on you. Let me tell you the truth... in the same way good men are hard to find, so also good women are hard to find. You might find a good woman, but does she dig you? Are you her standard? Would she be good to you and for you? Would you even want and love her? So, my dear, don't be so quick to fling your relationship out the window... nobody or relationship is perfect. Identify the things that can be remodelled and fixed...and make it work. A woman can't live in the same house with you if she doesn't love you. Heck! I can't stay with a guy 3 hours if I don't like him. You'd know at once that I don't dig you. As quickly as I can, I'd be looking for the exit. If this lady still treats you right, respects you and makes you feel good, then I think what you should focus on doing is putting an end to this co-habitting. Let her find someplace else to stay. Without being over-bearing, have a sincere talk with her about the issues you guys are experiencing in the relationship, the things that don't go down well with you, your plans for the two of you... put it in writing if that's the way you can best express yourself. Watching over her like a hawk won't do. If you make her feel suffocated, she'll just end the relationship once and for all. P. S To all of you guys... a girl would always have other toasters. You'd always have competitors. If it's not that way, then trust me, there's a problem. One or two might tickle her fancy, but she'll never leave you if you don't give her reasons to. 11 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by CAPSLOCKED: 8:23am On Mar 17, 2019 |
etiqutte: YOU'RE NOT IN A RELATIONSHIP. YOU'RE IN A JOKE. 3 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 9:48am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Intelligent of you. Leave those guys supporting the OP. They're looking for whom to control and lock up. Babe might even be very loyal but maybe seeks attention and validation. PrimadonnaO: 1 Like |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 9:50am On Mar 17, 2019 |
OP. Leave that girl be. Jeez! Let her have her space. Let her do whatever she wants. We only live once. YOLO. You can also buy her lots and lots of gifts to pacify her. Give her enough money than you've ever given her. Land. Cars. Even your debit card. I repeat, let her be. Let her enjoy herself. We only live once, abeg. |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by CosmicPhoenix: 10:11am On Mar 17, 2019 |
@OP,follow this advice at your peril UyaiIncomparabl: 1 Like |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by austyn0(m): 10:20am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Relationship and complications Whatever advice I am gonna give you is like medicine after death but I have to drop it anyways. If you are a spiritual somebody, God will definitely hand you over a good life partner when you are ready for marriage. Naturally, when you are ready to get married, come back home and tell people you trust to help you find someone they know too well because no matter how hard we try to shy away from the truth, relationship is a scam, very complicated, provided you and your partner are not alone in the world. Since you have started already, you both have gone a long way and you have invested much in her, try to make it work. All women are confused at some point in their life but some are confusion itself and it seems your girl belongs to that section. In matters like this with my little knowledge about successful relationship, communication goes a long way in salvaging relationships. Sit her down someday, with a calm and free heart, lay out whatever is worrying you to her and I would love to know the outcome. Goodluck man. 2 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Deicide: 10:22am On Mar 17, 2019 |
The Manipulated man |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by aanuoluwami14(f): 10:39am On Mar 17, 2019 |
etiqutte: O ga o, that is why good communication is good in any relationship. Why not talk to her, let her knows what you are thinking. Some people doesn't know if they are doing anything wrong, one Man's food is another man's poison. Let her know what you really want. Its better than you just conclude without knowing the real depth of the matter. Think twice. |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by LarryBee1k: 10:53am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Yuo |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by WINNERMENTALITY: 11:01am On Mar 17, 2019 |
Your Girl should be around 20-25 yrs and might be pretty. At this stage the only way to cage such a girl is pregnancy or marriage. Minus that allow her be, if she comes back to you, then she is yours 2 Likes |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by PrimadonnaO(f): 11:03am On Mar 17, 2019 |
UyaiIncomparabl: Exactly. |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by BIGGIE121(m): 12:00pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
Oga if you love her intensely give her mouth action whenever you are having sex with her ,.... U will thank me later |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Newboss(m): 2:19pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
You're too insecure. Grow some balls and let her handle her businesses.  |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by ikennamadu1(m): 2:20pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
MajorJeffery: Bro anybody weh no want your progress... make thunder fire am .. 1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by ikennamadu1(m): 2:22pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
UyaiIncomparabl: You be real jezebel.... your boyfriend go done suffer tire because of u 1 Like |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by DanDeeBoss(m): 3:02pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
UyaiIncomparabl:I get the gist #Badadvice |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Kendumazy(m): 3:15pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
Mheen |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by Daeylar(f): 3:17pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
She is hurting you, she is manipulating you, she is playing on your emotions, you're in pain from these her stupid games. , yet you say you love her. You love someone who gives you such pain?  Please dump her and look for peace of mind. You even engaged her, If she is hurting you this badly before marriage. How do you think she will treat you when you get married. Hmmm. A new moniker. |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by UyaiIncomparabl(f): 3:28pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
1 Like 1 Share |
| Re: You All Should Correct Me If I Am Wrong Pls by tosyne2much(m): 3:44pm On Mar 17, 2019 |
What I see here is that you seem to be caging a lady who wants to explore and flirt with men. Just let her be and stop shielding her from men. A lady that wants to flirt will definitely flirt, so the earlier you accept this the better for you. You have to be careful when dealing a lady who can't do without receiving calls from various men or being glued to her phone when she's with you |
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