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I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. - Family - Nairaland

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I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Marbella003(f): 1:30pm On May 11, 2019
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.

56 Likes 13 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by MiddleSpot: 1:33pm On May 11, 2019
I remember the first episode. What can I say.



This lady needs consolation. Perhaps the same mod who moved the first topic to Fp should move this to so a myriad of ideas and suggestions can be given to this lady.

37 Likes 4 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by erifeoluwasimi(f): 1:36pm On May 11, 2019
He is hurting and angry.give him time to heal.
Send important people he respects to plead on your behalf, like l pastors, friends etc

220 Likes 11 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by KevMitnick: 1:42pm On May 11, 2019
Just keep on begging him and never justify your actions for any reason. The pain of betrayal is worse than the pain of death, so I don't blame him. Give him time.

147 Likes 6 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Amanee(f): 1:44pm On May 11, 2019
Not everything works out as planned, you should have also prepared for this outcome when you decided to confess... I think you should be more concerned with your peace of mind now that you've fessed up than any fake bliss you were enjoying. You did the right thing by confessing and if your marriage has to end for it, then so be it. Take this as a crucial lesson and move on

332 Likes 18 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by sisisioge: 1:51pm On May 11, 2019
Chai! You confessed! Lordylordy!

I always knew you weren't much of a bright woman, didn't know it was this bad. Well, take heart. Remember he wasn't so appealing to you before now. Simply gather yourself together and forge ahead.

You will be fine last last.

155 Likes 8 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Divay22(f): 1:52pm On May 11, 2019
Hmmm

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Beckham14: 1:54pm On May 11, 2019
When you were spreading your legs like blue band you never thought of the love you had for that innocent man who put a roof over your head, you never thought of the "marriage" you wish to protect, Now you have lost the trust your parents had for you, and might as well lose the love of your kids when your "ex" husband tells them how promiscuous their mother is and how adventurous she can be with the dick in an hotel room.
Some mistakes are avoidable and you don't have any excuse to give for this silly mistake you brought upon yourself.
May God bless that your "ex" husband for handling that heart shattering news with such calmness, not all men can wait till you finish your sexcapdes without registering some thunderous blows on your face.
The m0ron who fuucked you like a cheap slut has dump you like a piece of trash.
Before you think of killing yourself by yourself, take those innocent children to your parents. I won't stop you from doing what you feel best for you, After all, you didn't seek for our opinions when you wanted to collect the dick.
Put yourself together and accept your fate.
Rest well.

383 Likes 54 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Nobody: 2:04pm On May 11, 2019
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Nice storyline BTW

389 Likes 24 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by ThothHermes: 2:09pm On May 11, 2019
erifeoluwasimi:
He is hurting and angry.give him time to heal.
Send important people he respects to plead on your behalf, like l pastors, friends etc
So pastor go fit sway you for this matter

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by faithfull18(f): 2:12pm On May 11, 2019
Hmmn, you should have known that the other guy you did it with will deny you when the chips are down.

For a guy to summon up courage to sleep with another man's wife, then he isn't responsible.

I feel for you, after confession, you get punished for the offence.

Just give your husband time, confess your sins to God and ask him to restore your home.

With God, all things are possible.

Learn from this and learn to keep your flesh under control.

76 Likes 3 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by powerkey: 2:25pm On May 11, 2019
Marbella003:
I took some of the advice from my previous thread and told my husband what happened. Here is the thread:

https://www.nairaland.com/5162191/cheated-husband-guy-work-dont

I was genuine shedding tears as I relayed my shameful experience to him. I apologized and begged for him to forgive me and I promised to never repeat such again. I thought he'd understand and forgive me. But I was wrong. My husband now wants a divorce. Actually, he has sent me and the kids out of his house. I have a daughter who is 4 and a son who is 2. My husband said he doesn't think he is the father. I assured him that he is and that he should get a DNA test to confirm. But he refused.

I rented a 2 bedroom flat somewhere close to my office. This is where I currently stay. Since leaving my husband's house I have only received a phone call from him where he stated the date that he and I were going to visit my parents who are currently in my village. He told me that if I wasn't going to come, he'd go alone and tell them what happened and why he decided to divorce me.

I feel like my life is over. I can't face my parents and tell them what I've done. It's very shameful. I can't even face my friends and relations. I feel like I'm drowning a pool of shame and despair. I can't imagine being a single mother at this age. I love my husband and I enjoyed our marriage. I can't imagine it all being over.

I called my colleague and told him everything. He said that I shouldn't hold him responsible for anything since our rendezvous was based on mutual consent. He said he doesn't want to have anything to with me and we should keep our relationship at work very platonic so as not to raise eyebrows of those who might link him to what happened with me.

I'm utterly hopeless. I feel like taking my life. I almost took this action yesterday but I pitied my children. But with every passing day I feel like suicide is the only way to end my pain. I wish I had listened to those people who advised me to keep what I did a secret. I wanted to, but every time I was with my husband I felt I was constantly betraying him by hiding the truth from him. I just want to die. I can't bare this pain anymore.
Be Strong.

it's better the way you confessed to him.

Yes, it's also better you pay the price of your sin now.

You are free now in the sense that you have confessed and therefore the burden is now on him.

However, you need to make efforts to reconcile. use your pastor (not the type that will take advantage of your situation).

Use your brother, any good family member will do.


And finally, Separate yourself from that useless guy/man in your office that took advantage of you.

Hate him with all the strength in you....


I will follow up on you and I assure you that your husband will return.

42 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Beckham14: 2:28pm On May 11, 2019
rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.
Some might come to her defense and say that she's working and probably her husband do give her some money, so she used part of her savings to rent a 2bedroom flat.

1 Like 2 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Jman06(m): 2:42pm On May 11, 2019
Story for the gods!

24 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by egojeny1(f): 2:49pm On May 11, 2019
Jman06:
Story for the gods!
Asin ehn! The babe na correct story teller.

39 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Nobody: 2:57pm On May 11, 2019
this op is a liar. I don't believe this story, Tales by moon light

39 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by pocohantas(f): 3:21pm On May 11, 2019
Bored alfa male... grin

10 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Omoluabi16(m): 3:29pm On May 11, 2019
Let him divorce you. But he will always respect you deep down. Peradventure he may accept you back. Your conscience is clear now..just see your travail as a consequence of getting that destructive pleasure. I salute you all the same. You did the right thing NY confessing.



Ps
some blockhead ladies here sha. Totally disgraceful wanting her to conceal.

13 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Tallesty1(m): 3:56pm On May 11, 2019
I don't understand, you stated clearly in the previous post that you'd love to shag that guy over and over again right? Now the opportunity is standing right before you and you're complaining.


Go get more fvck. You need it.


And while on it, please remember that you're on your own in this life. All those feminists that encourage women to fvck because men fvck won't come to your aid now that everything about you is fvcked, both your life and pussy.


On a serious note(assuming the story is true) what you did is just the right thing. Your husband will come back to his senses and if he has parents like mine, they will talk sense into his head and I am sure your parents will also plead on your behalf. Don't be scared to meet them, in fact you should call them(your parents) already. They will know how best to handle this.


If in the end he still refuses to take you back then move on, life goes on.

41 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Richy4(m): 4:12pm On May 11, 2019
rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

Every one is not as Broke and Financially challenged as u might think.. What does it take to find a house? There are lots of houses everywhere.. The question is does the person looking for the house have the money to pay for the outrageous amount the landlord will be demanding?.... If she's working and saving for rainy days such as this, what is the big deal?

56 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Chubhie: 4:17pm On May 11, 2019
Your husband lack compassion. That's too extreme from him. Regardless, you should stay strong. Its not the end of the world if your husband seeks divorce and wants nothing to do with the kids. You could go far away and start a new life with your kids.

Hopefully, you've learnt your lessons albeit in a very painful manner. Be open to love again. A man that matches your energy could come along and see you as the centre of his universe.

14 Likes 3 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Chubhie: 4:23pm On May 11, 2019
Beckham14:
When you were spreading your legs like blue band you never thought of the love you had for that innocent man who put a roof over your head, you never thought of the "marriage" you wish to protect, Now you have lost the trust your parents had for you, and might as well lose the love of your kids when your "ex" husband tells them how promiscuous their mother is and how adventurous she can be with the dick in an hotel room.
Some mistakes are avoidable and you don't have any excuse to give for this silly mistake you brought upon yourself.
May God bless that your "ex" husband for handling that heart shattering news with such calmness, not all men can wait till you finish your sexcapdes without registering some thunderous blows on your face.
The m0ron who fuucked you like a cheap slut has dump you like a piece of trash.
Before you think of killing yourself by yourself, take those innocent children to your parents. I won't stop you from doing what you feel best for you, After all, you didn't seek for our opinions when you wanted to collect the dick.
Put yourself together and accept your fate.
Rest well.
That's too mean a thing to say to someone whose at their weakest point.

27 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by 9japrof(m): 4:30pm On May 11, 2019
grin grin

Infidelity never ends well, when you posted your first story line, about cheating on your husband with a colleague and keep wishing that you would have a repeat of it, I then knew you were a certified fool...

You are a bloody leach, you left guys of late 20's and early 30's to marry a money bag whose age difference with yours is 20 years and you think you would remain attracted to him, that's why ladies like you, tonto and Regina would always have a very bad pay day, story lines like your never end well... you are a bloody gold digger, subtract ur Hubby's deep pockets, would you have married him, ask yourself that question?

To cap it off, you are way way dumb, as much as I hate infidelity, if my wife should by lapse judgement engage in one, she better keep it to herself cos if she tells, she's going that day...

God bless that man for saving him from Jezebel

***buh why is it when you people wanna make senseless posts about una nonsense acts, you quickly create a new profile to hide your true identity since you idiots paint a near perfect life on your original profiles***

91 Likes 4 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Beckham14: 4:43pm On May 11, 2019
Chubhie:

That's too mean a thing to say to someone whose at their weakest point.
I never interrupted you when you made your comment. Please mind your business.

51 Likes 3 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Chubhie: 4:46pm On May 11, 2019
Beckham14:
I never interrupted you when you made your comment. Please mind your business.

50 Likes 2 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by SweetPoison22: 4:47pm On May 11, 2019
Beckham14:
I never interrupted you when you made your comment. Please mind your business.
grin

4 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Richy4(m): 5:07pm On May 11, 2019
OP... I think you did the right thing by telling your man...
I'm glad you told your story on this forum... so that others that were trying to do the same will think twice...

You have made your mistake and in every decision human has made, good or bad, there's consequences ... u have to live with the consequences of your actions with dignity.. ... You are not the first to commit adultery and you are not going to be the last... Do not commit suicide because of this...

Do not be angry with your husband... whatever he is dishing out to you, he has that right... Just bear with him for now... take care of your kids... For now if your man asked you to jump, just ask how high... he might take you back but if he doesn't, just take care of your children and learn how to be alone....

17 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by 1cor2v9: 5:22pm On May 11, 2019
The moment she said she enjoyed the evil act with the colleague and even wants more I knew her innocent husband deserves to be with someone better...

71 Likes 10 Shares

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by jeff1607(m): 5:24pm On May 11, 2019
rafhell:
Something tells me the OP is a big liar.
Let us read between the lines. You put out your post 11 days ago asking for advice. In eleven days, all these drama had played out.
You even got a 2 bedroom accommodation close to your work place and you already moved in with the kids.
Madam or whoever you are, not everybody on nairaland is daft.

the matter shock me oo

seems she premeditated her husband's response

4 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by fertilewomb: 5:50pm On May 11, 2019
Well move on. It's not the end of life. Adultery is the only stated reason for divorce according to the bible.

Is not every sin you confess to people. Bible said Confess your sin to God and not man.

You should have confessed to God and forget about it.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by mankettle(m): 6:09pm On May 11, 2019
Damn. this is why it is not good to confess some sins..anyways. you will require legal services soon. either to protect the union or to protect the kids and you from the fallout.
it's sad this as occurred but please take heart and don't allow the small children to be affected.

4 Likes

Re: I Told My Husband That I Cheated On Him. Now He Wants A Divorce. by Ishilove: 6:24pm On May 11, 2019
This story get as e be.

21 Likes

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