HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] - Romance - Nairaland
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| HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:26pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
So, yesterday, I was in a friend's house when a prettier version of Regina Daniels called him — she should be at most 21 — 24 years, but beautiful in all rounds, especially her huge ass. Don't judge my naughty eyes yet. We left the house and... Typing... 1 Like
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| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:27pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
We left the house and headed to the bank to take some change. Minutes later, she arrived looking dashing. She was shy when our eyes met, but as a guy man, I made her comfortable instantly. We headed to Krisdera Hotel to take some drinks. Since 2015, I haven't taken alcohol, but decided to give it a try yesterday. We got inside the bar section and saw an army man getting high. On the other side of the table was the DJ controlling some ladies and some men as they drink, smoke shisha, while dancing as if APC is about to fulfil all their 2015 promises. We sat, and I... Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:28pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
We sat, and I signaled the female bartender to come over — the environment looks clean and well-maintained. She catwalked and I looked deep into her eyes without a single word and she started smiling. "Where is your menu?" I asked, but she was hesitant, so I told her to give me a bottle of Heineken. My friend doesn't like beer-related drinks, so he ordered a different kind of hot drink. We asked the girl to order as many as she can handle, but she was a little shy, so my friend ordered one of the most dangerous drinks for her. The DJ was... Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:28pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
The DJ was good as he rotates Don Jazzy's Indian boy's song called Dumebi, to Timaya's I can't kill myself, Davido, Wizkid, 2face, and so on. One hour drinking, shaking heads, and at the same time, watching Australia Vs. Brazil's match, I got a little tipsy, so I headed to the restroom to ease my bladder. The army man was shaking his head as he tries to control his highness. Some men on the other table forming big men with some drunk girls were smoking as they drink and shake-body like like native doctors. Yes, they were... Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:28pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
Yes, they were kinda high. Some guys were constantly taking a glance of the girl we came with. I guess most pretty girls have flat asses, so this one was different. She has a bright future behind her. James (my friend) and I use the same phone, so he grabbed my phone, powered the camera and took a picture at the same time with his to compare which is better. Luckily, mine was. Y'all know I'm not a Liverpool fan, but I never walk alone. I laughed at him and the girl was curious, so she requested to see and we gave her the two phones. James brought his mouth... Typing... 2 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:31pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
James brought his mouth close to my ear as the music blasts and said, "Guy, I wan go restroom. Use this opportunity relate with her." "Guy, no be woman dey my mind and I no sure say I like her that much. Na to become richer than Dangote dey my mind," I replied and he laughed, then mixed his drink with hers and she said, "I can't finish it." He left and I was on the table with her. I made her lean closer to me as I began to implement my irresistible codes of Joe Clef's book called FemaleSextapes. If you haven't read the book, do read it. She laughed as I teased her. I knew the army man and the other guys around were eyeing her. "Abeg, gimme my phone make you no go see wetin big pass you — I have too many naughty things in that phone," I said and she became curious. She wanted to see those naughty things. Women and naughty things are like 5&6. Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:31pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
"Which network do you use?" I asked, "MTN," she replied. "MTN? Those criminals? I hope you're not like them," I teased. "No o!" she replied with smiles on her face. "Okay. Now, I feel safe. Type your MTN on my phone," I commanded like a boss and she quickly typed her number. Then, I told her to save it and she did. I changed the topic and some minutes later, James came back. The DJ was still busy and these men were still smoking as they danced with the ladies. Yes, they can dance and they tried to seduce us, but me I no get time for that kind thing. While sipping my Heineken, I was thinking of the next business to venture into. All I think about nowadays is business or investment. Now, this is the funny part.... Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:32pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
Now, this is the funny part. I got up and headed to the restroom for the second time and some men were hailing me as if I was a king or the richest man in the world. Yes, sometimes, the way you carry yourself and your calm body language can make people think you're a billionaire. I guess, my body language exudes billions + asshole. While returning, the wicked DJ changed the song and the next thing I heard was: Omo see brother (brother) See brother (brother) See brother (brother) Omo see brother (brother) Brother wey mumu (brother) Brother wey mumu (brother) Brother wey no wise (brother) Brother no get size (brother) As the song was playing, the men stopped dancing and sat down. I come start to dey laugh them, but if I continue walking back to the bar, it will look as if the song was talking about me, so I had to pause and observe from a far. The girls were still busy dancing as the song continued... U carry woman go club U spend all your money De girl talk say she no do U come dey cry (U carry woman go club U spend all your money De girl talk say she no do U come dey cry) U carry woman go club U spend all your money De girl talk say she no do U come dey cry (U carry woman go club U spend all your money De girl talk say she no do U come dey cry) I started making fake calls just to seem busy. All na wash. Despite seeing how scanty the dance floor was becoming, the stubborn DJ refused to change the song and the next thing was: Omo see aunty (aunty) See aunty (aunty) See aunty (aunty) Omo see aunty (aunty) Aunty wey mumu (aunty) Aunty wey mumu (aunty) Aunty wey no wise (aunty) Aunty no get size (aunty) Omo do bio do bio (do bio) Omo do bio do bio (do bio) Immediately, the girls sat down, but one was still forming Miss Drunk. Omo do Po Po (po po) I say do po po (po po) U carry small boy go club U spend all your money De boy talk say he no do U come dey cry (U carry small boy go club U spend all your money De boy talk say he no do U come dey cry) U carry small boy go club U spend all your money De boy talk say he no do U come dey cry (U carry small boy go club U spend all your money De boy talk say he no do U come dey cry) At the end of the song, the dance floor was empty. I came back and realized Australia has recovered from 2 - 1 against Brazil to 2 - 2. The army man carry style waka commot. The girls them come dey watch football. Aunty dem done humble. I couldn't... Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:32pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
I couldn't believe a meaningful song like that could send everyone parking. One thing I learned is: when someone is doing something bad, he or she hates hearing the truth because it hurts. Immediately, I Googled the song by typing, "Brother wey mumu," to find out who sang it. Damn! It was Patoranking. At last, the girl we came with was tipsy, but she controlled herself until we left the bar. Minutes later, she started missing some steps. As gentle men, we had to take her home — it was already 8:15 PM. We bought bole and suya, then went home. Lots of funny things happened, but let's keep it short. Please, all DJs around the world should not play that songs again — it ruined the fun. There is time for everything. Typing... |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 8:32pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
"Brother wey mumu" are those nice guys who form big boys while wasting the money they would've invested on women in exchange for sex. Please, my fellow men, don't be a BWM. If you see a man wasting cash on women for sex, he is a full blown Brother Wey Mumu (BWM) — he is not wise. Wise men rule the world. 6 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by Tony142: 9:01pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
Wow, Interesting story |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by Pharaoh4rin(m): 10:14pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
What an experience! u d reason mark zuckerberg |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by clive2u(m): 10:39pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
Did u nyash her? 2 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by issylarry(m): 11:59pm On Jun 14, 2019 |
U try.. |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by youngsahito(m): 12:01am On Jun 15, 2019 |
iLegendd:you really tried with story...you can be our next Achebe 5 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by ThinkSmarter: 6:33am On Jun 15, 2019 |
That song is anti-Oringo and it brings bad mkt to the club owner, the clubee and the cluber #lol 4 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 2:11pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
clive2u:I'm a virgin. 1 Like |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by DBlackCeazer(m): 2:41pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
All these long story because of 1 song? Na wa 2 u o 1 Like |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 3:07pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
DBlackCeazer:If you can tell a story with just 1 song, then you can write a bestselling book with 2 songs. And that can fetch you lots of money. Don't you think so? 4 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by clive2u(m): 3:13pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
iLegendd:or virgin island |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by chizzypresh(f): 3:15pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
iLegendd: |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by DBlackCeazer(m): 3:16pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
iLegendd:u dey try, at least u kept me hooked till the end, my advice tho, always make it worth a while. Kudos. |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 3:21pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
DBlackCeazer:Nice reply. If I may ask, what do you mean by, "...ending it positively?" Is it by sleeping with her? Or what? Modified: Oh, you've modified your comment. |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 3:22pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
chizzypresh:KC Presh's sister, how is the weather over there? Is it for 1 or 2? |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by DBlackCeazer(m): 3:24pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
iLegendd:not necessarily, I just meant the story should deliver positive messages, talk about important issues etc. |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 3:33pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
DBlackCeazer: I guess you didn't finish it. There are 3 messages in the story — if not more. How come you didn't see them? Message 1: Don't spend on a woman because you want sex. Message 2: Don't form big boy while at the club just to impress. Message 3: People who are doing naughty things don't like listening to meaningful songs. Message 4: When at the club, people want to have fun, so DJs should know the songs to play. Message 5: Australia was 1 goal down, but they bounced back and won Brazil — never give up. In fact, if you read the story carefully, you'll see lots of messages — if you don't see them, then I recommend Business Section or Diary Section to you. 3 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by chizzypresh(f): 4:37pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by iLegendd(m): 5:26pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
chizzypresh:I usually get people pregnant in anything that has to do with "weather for 2," so I'll pass. I no want make your belly swell yet. Do you mind? |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by joeeee240(m): 6:00pm On Jun 15, 2019 |
iLegendd: I like how you think. You're smart 1 Like |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by DBlackCeazer(m): 3:39am On Jun 16, 2019 |
iLegendd:wow, five live changing messages, how could I ve missed these messages, u should be called Mr. Message. Nice one! 3 Likes |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by chizzypresh(f): 8:20am On Jun 17, 2019 |
iLegendd: You no well oo   1 Like |
| Re: HAHAHAHA. I Couldn't Stop Laughing — Brother Wey Mumu [Picture] by RICHOLAC(m): 8:18pm On Oct 04, 2019 |
Nice one op |
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