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Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. - Family - Nairaland

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Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Rigel95(m): 8:21pm On Dec 29, 2019
They constantly nag, abuse their men emotionally, frustrate them,rile them, until they reach their breaking point and snaps or do something silly. So they turn around to scream blue murder when such happens. Let me paint a scenario.

Growing up, we once had a family that moved into the next flat. At first they seemed like any normal happy family, until we hot close to them.

The woman was the type that would always want to have the last word in a discussion/argument. The man dared not enter the house any minute past 5:30pm, the woman would constantly nag him, oftentimes singing these Iyaaladukes insulting songs(Yoruba people would know) about irresponsible husbands. In fact, I lost count of how many times that man would come to stylishly collect garri from my mom under the pretense that they forgot to buy garri from town (we were living in a new site) while actually it was the wife's policy to deny him food anytime he comes home after 5:30pm, meanwhile you would never suspect that woman was like that, she was the perfect wife outside. We got to know from our friends (their kids) that it all started when the man lost his job at The Nigerian Steel rolling company ( even though the man was working in a sec. School in the meantime). Meanwhile, during that time, the man never raised his arms against the woman o.

Fast forward some months later, the man found a job in a multinational company, impregnated another woman and took custody of his three kids forcefully. Most people who didn't know the real situation of things then, were calling the man names for abandoning the woman who "stood by him through thick and thin" not knowing the man was virtually living in hell before.

Ever wonder why many men die quicker before their time? It's probably as a result of emotional abuse from their women.

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by MycroftHolmes: 8:26pm On Dec 29, 2019
That's my greatest fear..

Getting married to the wrong woman.
Many men are trapped with ill-mannered wives, and divorce is not an option because they prolly have a reputation to protect.

And such wives as these are chronic pretenders. They act like angels outside (or when there's an older guest in the house) and return to their devil form when they're alone with their spouses.

What's worse Is that they even make their children believe that their spouse is uncaring and hates them.

The worst thing that can happen to a man is marrying a woman who has reason to be rebellious. It can make a man lose everything he ever worked for.

6 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by bukatyne(f): 8:29pm On Dec 29, 2019
Rigel95:
They constantly nag, abuse their men emotionally, frustrate them,rile them, until they reach their breaking point and snaps or do something silly. So they turn around to scream blue murder when such happens. Let me paint a scenario.

Growing up, we once had a family that moved into the next flat. At first they seemed like any normal happy family, until we hot close to them.

The woman was the type that would always want to have the last word in a discussion/argument. The man dared not enter the house any minute past 5:30pm, the woman would constantly nag him, oftentimes singing these Iyaaladukes insulting songs(Yoruba people would know) about irresponsible husbands. In fact, I lost count of how many times that man would come to stylishly collect garri from my mom under the pretense that they forgot to buy garri from town (we were living in a new site) while actually it was the wife's policy to deny him food anytime he comes home after 5:30pm, meanwhile you would never suspect that woman was like that, she was the perfect wife outside. We got to know from our friends (their kids) that it all started when the man lost his job at The Nigerian Steel rolling company ( even though the man was working in a sec. School in the meantime). Meanwhile, during that time, the man never raised his arms against the woman o.

Fast forward some months later, the man found a job in a multinational company, impregnated another woman and took custody of his three kids forcefully. Most people who didn't know the real situation of things then, were calling the man names for abandoning the woman who "stood by him through thick and thin" not knowing the man was virtually living in hell before.

Ever wonder why many men die quicker before their time? It's probably as a result of emotional abuse from their women.

Interesting story.

And you are right: women should stop emotionally abusing their men.

A number of people are usually 'angry' at these 'he/she dumped the people who stayed with them' when they made it because they are using the people.

Let's take your story as an example:

Your neighbor's wife emotionally abused her husband. However, the husband waited until he was 'rich' again before finding another sisi.

Perhaps if he left after he found it unbearable before getting his dream job, people would not carry face.

I am not judging him; I am just stating facts.

This is a lesson to people that the tide can turn overnight for good or bad.

3 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by donbachi(m): 8:39pm On Dec 29, 2019
Widows no dey again,men don wise...if she trouble u too much,find one bar relax with few bottles and if she dey stingy with d thing, find one babe take hold body...if u die she go still fvck another man....so,instead of dey house dey think and blood presure come dey rise as a result of her presure.

4 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Eaztzide: 8:39pm On Dec 29, 2019
This kind of article is rarely seen on social media because most of us don't believe it can happen. We must end all form of emotional traumatization no matter the sex involved. We shouldn't be saying a man should take anything that's thrown at just because he's man of the house. Men got to speak up

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by lilmax(m): 8:43pm On Dec 29, 2019
You should always slap a woman when she enters that idiotic phase

1 Like

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Thegeneralqueen(f): 8:47pm On Dec 29, 2019
Nigerian men wants to always eat their cake and have it very useless set of beings

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Abfinest007(m): 8:48pm On Dec 29, 2019
park well
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Thegeneralqueen(f): 8:48pm On Dec 29, 2019
lilmax:
You should always slap a woman when she enters that idiotic phase
Lemme start with you

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Miner13: 8:57pm On Dec 29, 2019
fear of woman beginning of wisdom...alot with letter W ''woman,wealth,world,wisdom just name them they are all a fairytale
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Miner13: 8:59pm On Dec 29, 2019
Thegeneralqueen:
Lemme start with you
When you're through with hoeing you'll receive sense

4 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by ZIMDRILL(m): 9:01pm On Dec 29, 2019
Rigel95:
They constantly nag, abuse their men emotionally, frustrate them,rile them, until they reach their breaking point and snaps or do something silly. So they turn around to scream blue murder when such happens. Let me paint a scenario.

Growing up, we once had a family that moved into the next flat. At first they seemed like any normal happy family, until we hot close to them.

The woman was the type that would always want to have the last word in a discussion/argument. The man dared not enter the house any minute past 5:30pm, the woman would constantly nag him, oftentimes singing these Iyaaladukes insulting songs(Yoruba people would know) about irresponsible husbands. In fact, I lost count of how many times that man would come to stylishly collect garri from my mom under the pretense that they forgot to buy garri from town (we were living in a new site) while actually it was the wife's policy to deny him food anytime he comes home after 5:30pm, meanwhile you would never suspect that woman was like that, she was the perfect wife outside. We got to know from our friends (their kids) that it all started when the man lost his job at The Nigerian Steel rolling company ( even though the man was working in a sec. School in the meantime). Meanwhile, during that time, the man never raised his arms against the woman o.

Fast forward some months later, the man found a job in a multinational company, impregnated another woman and took custody of his three kids forcefully. Most people who didn't know the real situation of things then, were calling the man names for abandoning the woman who "stood by him through thick and thin" not knowing the man was virtually living in hell before.

Ever wonder why many men die quicker before their time? It's probably as a result of emotional abuse from their women.

a woman would also write the same story

compared between men and women

mostly women suffer in abusive marriage simple because they got no where to go

remember without knowing most african culture encourages marry young

just imagine a girl of 21 marries without and 10 years down the line she finally call it quit, she has threes kids and she only hold an "O level" certificate

society looks down on divorce and she has to start from zero to look after herself financially

8 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Pavore9: 9:03pm On Dec 29, 2019
lilmax:
You should always slap a woman when she enters that idiotic phase

I hope you can also slap a Nigerian soldier or a Police officer when they behave like idiots towards you?

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:03pm On Dec 29, 2019
And u have not seen men who emotionally abuse women?
These days, we have more men who emotionally abuse men than women.

Starting from nairaland

3 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by crackhaus: 9:05pm On Dec 29, 2019
lilmax:
You should always slap a woman when she enters that idiotic phase
Always.

I cannot abide a woman who constantly abuses and riles me up.
I will excuse it in a stranger and walk away because I don't owe them my emotions, but with my own partner, she will be given a reboot - just one slap... no more, no less.

My apology will come afterwards.

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Rigel95(m): 9:06pm On Dec 29, 2019
ZIMDRILL:


a woman would also write the same story

compared between men and women

mostly women suffer in abusive marriage simple because they got no where to go

remember without knowing most african culture encourages marry young

just imagine a girl of 21 marries without and 10 years down the line she finally call it quit, she has threes kids and she only hold an "O level" certificate

society looks down on divorce and she has to start from zero to look after herself financially
Well why not? A woman can and should write a woman's perspective. The point of this is to highlight emotional abuse from the angle of men

1 Like

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:06pm On Dec 29, 2019
lilmax:
You should always slap a woman when she enters that idiotic phase
And u haven't seen a woman that will knock you out with one blow?

I saw a video of one woman giving it to her husband who wanted to flex his muscle on her.
It was fun to watch

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by crackhaus: 9:08pm On Dec 29, 2019
sassysure:
And u have not seen men who emotionally abuse women?
These days, we have more men who emotionally abuse men than women.

Starting from nairaland
They are talking about couples, married or partners, you are talking of Nairaland.

Wetin concern the women with the men on nairaland? grin

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:09pm On Dec 29, 2019
crackhaus:

Always.

I cannot abide a woman who constantly abuses and riles me up.
I will excuse it in a stranger and walk away because I don't owe them my emotions, but with my own partner, she will be given a reboot - just one slap... no more, no less.

My apology will come afterwards.
If a woman abuse u with words, u get mouth too.
Make use of your mouth.

Meanwhile men get bad mouth more than women.
The only difference is that women can endure more than men for peace to reign.

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Rigel95(m): 9:09pm On Dec 29, 2019
Thegeneralqueen:
Nigerian men wants to always eat their cake and have it very useless set of beings
undecided
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:11pm On Dec 29, 2019
crackhaus:

They are talking about couples, married or partners, you are talking of Nairaland.

Wetin concern the women with the men on nairaland? grin

Cos u guys are Nigerians and example of what we see at home.

I'm very serious.
Men abuse women emotionally more.

One sentence and the woman will die

1 Like

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:18pm On Dec 29, 2019
An emotionally abusive man is very controlling.
U are a robot around him.
It's like hypnotism.

And from emotionally abusing u, he will start beating you.
Such men will abuse u, when u are down and crying, that is when he will make u suck him up or make love to u.

The day u start defending yourself, he will go AJ on you.

Nonsense and ingredients.
Every time women this and that.

As if to say the men are saints.

Nigeria is bad from politics to religion to family, no be u guys.

2 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by crackhaus: 9:19pm On Dec 29, 2019
sassysure:

If a woman abuse u with words, u get mouth too.
Make use of your mouth.


Meanwhile men get bad mouth more than women.
The only difference is that women can endure more than men for peace to reign.

Not just any woman. A woman I don't know or care for will definitely be ignored.

But for a woman who calls herself my partner, who shares my bed and my life, to abuse me endlessly with her words, she has earned for herself a slap. No two ways about it.

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:21pm On Dec 29, 2019
crackhaus:

Not just any woman. A woman I don't know or care for will definitely be ignored.

But for a woman who calls herself my partner, who shares my bed and my life, to abuse me endlessly with her words, she has earned for herself a slap. No two ways about it.

And if she strong pass you?

U guys eeh.

Women dey beat up their husbands o.
Serious beating.
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by crackhaus: 9:24pm On Dec 29, 2019
sassysure:


Cos u guys are Nigerians and example of what we see at home.

I'm very serious.
Men abuse women emotionally more.

One sentence and the woman will die

Of course there are men like that, but if you're trying to sell the narrative that men are generally more verbally/emotionally abusive to women, sorry no one is buying.

Even the Dalai Lama in all his serenity and calmness knows women are more of the perpetrators.

5 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by crackhaus: 9:26pm On Dec 29, 2019
sassysure:


And if she strong pass you?

U guys eeh.

Women dey beat up their husbands o.
Serious beating.

Why on earth will she be stronger than me?

I don't understand.
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by bukatyne(f): 9:32pm On Dec 29, 2019
Thegeneralqueen:
Nigerian men wants to always eat their cake and have it very useless set of beings

How?
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:33pm On Dec 29, 2019
crackhaus:

Of course there are men like that, but if you're trying to sell the narrative that men are generally more verbally/emotionally abusive to women, sorry no one is buying.

Even the Dalai Lama in all his serenity and calmness knows women are more of the perpetrators.
I'm not trying to sell anything.
The only explanation is that some don't normally retaliate most times because of peace and then society don't care much about cases like that.
Men are very very abusive.

Those things u think a women abuse women with, men use things like that twice.
Meet reverend fathers not pastors, they will tell u the undiluted truth about male emotional abuse. Its tolerated and hidden.
Why do married women look for emotional comfort outside?
From emotional comfort, the inevitable will happen.
Leave matter.
For every 10 married women, more than 6 are emotionally abused by their husband.
Some women are even so scared of their husband to talk anyhow to him.
Women still use sir to address their husband.
Is it the person u answer sir, u will talk to anyhow?
Guy, forget.

2 Likes

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by Nobody: 9:34pm On Dec 29, 2019
crackhaus:

Why on earth will she be stronger than me?

I don't understand.
Physical strength.
Or u don't know some women are extremely strong?
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by bukatyne(f): 9:34pm On Dec 29, 2019
ZIMDRILL:


a woman would also write the same story

compared between men and women

mostly women suffer in abusive marriage simple because they got no where to go

remember without knowing most african culture encourages marry young

just imagine a girl of 21 marries without and 10 years down the line she finally call it quit, she has threes kids and she only hold an "O level" certificate

society looks down on divorce and she has to start from zero to look after herself financially

This thread is about men na.

A lot of men are really suffering and they do not have help as much as women.

Even NGOs named abuse centers (without the women tag) would prioritize women and children.

In Nigeria, the face of domestic violence is still women.

1 Like

Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by bukatyne(f): 9:41pm On Dec 29, 2019
crackhaus:

Always.

I cannot abide a woman who constantly abuses and riles me up.
I will excuse it in a stranger and walk away because I don't owe them my emotions, but with my own partner, she will be given a reboot - just one slap... no more, no less.

My apology will come afterwards.

Hahahaha

You have the sequence ready:

Constant abuses - - - - - one slap - - - - - - - apologies (which includes & & &wink

On a serious note, I do not consider the resulting slap 'physical abuse'.

It is more of a keep quiet mechanism especially when the abuses dey enter body.

Maybe because I went to boarding house sha. You run your mouth too much, you chop slap.

If you are too big/strong, people will leave you till one day they will mass you.

When our seniors that are very wicked finish WAEC, we gather and mass them.

I insulted one senior like that and felt bad years later sha.

I had to repent of it.

P.S.: mass = joint beating.

Some peeps are too much to handle alone grin
Re: Why Women Should Stop Emotionally Abusing Men. by cassyrooy(m): 9:41pm On Dec 29, 2019
sassysure:


Cos u guys are Nigerians and example of what we see at home.

I'm very serious.
Men abuse women emotionally more.


One sentence and the woman will die

Acknowledging that it has no place in a matrimonial setting is enough, not who perpetrate it against the other.

I've seen both cases in my childhood years and in my adult life too.

Few days back I had to grant someone ‘space’ when she asked for it. She once asked me that ‘‘if I can't handle her, I should let her go and meet those who can’’.

There was a little fight in September where I told her she was causing me pain, and she needs to adjust but her reply was, she doesn't change for anyone. I just bottled up until this recent one where her own lamentations where much and demanded I heed, I was just laughing because I wanted to negotiate things but she was adamant to resolve my own complaints.

Lol! I've spilled more than enough self.

But my point is, abuse goes both ways and should be seen as such, not who does more or less. Anyone can be a victim of emotional (and other forms of) abuse. And funny enough, even in ordinary friendship, people can be abused.

2 Likes

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