This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

We so much cherish and value new things more than old ones thinking they are the best, forgetting that the new ones will still turn old.

Bruv, don't ever leave your good wife for a side chick because of sex. Sex is something any lady can offer, but not all ladies possesses wifely attributes.

Kindly keep your wife and do whatever that will bring you sexual happiness in a reasonable way without hurting your wife and family.

can we blame ur village people already

So, is because of sex you want to leave your wife ,who has given you two beautiful kids for a young girl who is in her flirting and hoeing period because she dy give you different styles....

You see how devil is using you to manipulate yourself because of sex you can get from olosho house and still be at peace with your wife.....

You have been with your wife for 12years with children. A great wife according to you but no adventure and boring sex life.

You equally have a girlfriend, less than a year relationship with great sex and adventure.
But you want to leave your wife with all the good qualities and joint your girlfriend.

What other qualities did you mention about this your girlfriend apart from sex.

When your eyes fully open, I pray it will not be too late.

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

Better tell ur wife the real gist to make her sit right and u guys should work more on ur sexuality and attractiveness.

But wait, is divorce the solution to everything? cus me i dont understand oo

Me i cant divorce oo, i would rather go polygamous... Anybody that tell me polygamy is a sin should also tell me if David, Solomon, Abraham, Job, Jacob, Mohammed and the rest are currently in hellfire., If u cant tell me dat den shut whatsoever in ur mind up...

ONA GET EEM TIME,WETIN U DEA WAIT OGA,GO AHEAD NA

Hian new monikers daily bringing in tales by moon light
Oga we yaff hia pleasssssssssss divorce your wife straight and Marry the edible catering.


Hiss

You've been with your wife for 12yrs and your kids are 1.
Two years ago, u started having fling
I don't understand, I really don't

Was it that you waited for 11yrs or what
Address the main issue gan-gan.

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

Girlfriends are just there to put spice into your sex life, nothing more. Just fucck for some months and move on to the next victim. Despite the fact that adultery is bad, very very bad, but the reality of life is that men get bored of their wives and want to spice up their sex drive once in a while, that is what side chick are there for. Never ever marry a side chick. If you do the mistake of marrying her, after few years, you will get tired of her and look for another girl to spice up your sexual appeal. A side chick should remain a side chick until you are done with her and move to the next.

Good thing you said your wife used to be freaky freaky before now. This goes to show that after your now freaky freaky becomes the Mrs and drops a few, you will be back out in the streets looking for a new freaky freaky. Pkele, I feel your pain but divorce should not be the solution. Maybe your Mrs is exhausted or emotionally stressed. See if you can make things romantic with her. Plus it's OK to be the initiator in the bedroom too.

is your brain paining you? go and make your wife happy my friend. that your girlfriend is secretly giving your hard earned money to one guy out there

Stupid fake story. U supposedly married at 24 and your wife at 20. Then you have twins, age 1.
If u have been childless for 11 years, one year is too quick to kill all your joy from father hood to embrace cheating.

I am suspecting nl now hires ppl to post captivating but FAKE stories cos the kind of stories I see these days, are playing with my intelligence.

Foodqueen:
You've been with your wife for 12yrs and your kids are 1.
Two years ago, u started having fling
I don't understand, I really don't

Was it that you waited for 11yrs or what
Address the main issue gan-gan.

thank u jare. My thoughts exactly. All these fake stories!

yvelchstores:
thank u jare. My thoughts exactly. All these fake stories!

The entertainment this days eeh..,.no be small thing.

. Na so una prick go dey cause problems for una. So u go impregnate am,come marry am later ,,,begin create problems for ur kids

After the sex wears off what next? Very soon, you will begin to see the flaws and the attitude and then you will realize that you have made a mistake. My brother, let me tell you, the only guaranteed sex you will ever get from a woman is with a hooker.
Very soon, your girl will not provide sex on demand, they will be reasons why she can't have sex with you and then you start looking elsewhere. How long will you continue that?
Anyway, sometimes it does work out but most times you end up regretting. Stick with the woman you married. If you insist on looking for someone to satisfy you, please don't leave your wife for her.

PS:
I'm replying to this because this can be someone's reality. It's obvious the OP cooked up this story but nonetheless, some men out there are actually thinking of replacing their wives with side chicks. They should be careful.

Smh

⁠For the love of God don't give your wife an STD
⁠For the love of God keep your household in shape for the sake of those kids.
Talk to your wife. Not about this, but how to get things in shape at home, so you don't run off and do things like this which you know are wrong.

Leaving a wife for the side-chic on top puccy
Kai...

Some men need flogging.. how is this girl's puccy better than that of your wife. As in, what exactly is the difference?

I really want to understand, because this makes no sense at all.

If you want to keep having sex with this girl on the side, then keep doing that..but never ever think of wifing a side-chic at the expense of the real wife, I repeat NEVER.

Try get sense abeg...it's just sex.

Lmao. Very casually advocating for him to continue cheating. None of you deserve a faithful woman.


Hypocrisy

viceddy95:

So, is because of sex you want to leave your wife ,who has given you two beautiful kids for a young girl who is in her flirting and hoeing period because she dy give you different styles....

You see how devil is using you to manipulate yourself because of sex you can get from olosho house and still be at peace with your wife.....

donstan18:
We so much cherish and value new things more than old ones thinking they are the best, forgetting that the new ones will still turn old.

Bruv, don't ever leave your good wife for a side chick because of sex. Sex is something any lady can offer, but not all ladies possesses wifely attributes.

Kindly keep your wife and do whatever that will bring you sexual happiness in a reasonable way without hurting your wife and family.

olofo omo

papaejima20199:

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.
Thanks for reading

Before it used to be women who are always this emotional. You'd be surprised that 22yo is just scheming. That girl don't love you. With that said, let's now talk about the problem here, YOU. That sexual desire you are getting from that your side chic, you can get that from your wife. You lack the skills to get what you want from your wife. You see women conform to the present environment, so she being cold about sex could be you are cold about sex around her. You've gotten too comfortable and is she. She might be waiting for you to make the move. Just come back from work, lay on the bed in your room naked and when she walks in, tell her to show you what's she's got, she should make you climax. Of course she will be off guard and all, she might not do it, she might do it. She does it, fine, build on it, always put her up for work. Always make her do the sex thing... Arouse her in weird ways. Then if she didn't oblige to it which I'm 50% sure she won't, then tell her she's driving you outside. And watch the spark return.

Don't ever wife that 22yo girl, you'd realize you made a mistake if you do it.

If want ti leave your wife becos of sex with another woman and you need advice. Please leave her so she can get a man who deserves her and treats her like a good woman Good riddance to an ungrateful bad rubbish

Is there anything in the hole u entered that is different from the hole in your wife? You men need to understand it is all in the mind, nothing more.

All of the time you have spent on this lady, taking her places, fun places admiring her and telling her things she wants to hear. If u spent half of this time with ur wife and did half of these things with her , I would see same happiness. But at your age it's unfortunate that you want to throw away a family because of public toilet, what a shame !!!

You never deserved to be a father or husband , just a big fool who has no sense .

donstan18:
We so much cherish and value new things more than old ones thinking they are the best, forgetting that the new ones will still turn old.

Bruv, don't ever leave your good wife for a side chick because of sex. Sex is something any lady can offer, but not all ladies possesses wifely attributes.

Kindly keep your wife and do whatever that will bring you sexual happiness in a reasonable way without hurting your wife and family.

Thank you, I know you are probably correct in all of your points. This is exactly why I posted here. I need some cold hard truth to maybe splash some water on my face.

cococandy:
Lmao. Very casually advocating for him to continue cheating. None of you deserve a faithful woman.


Hypocrisy

Sorry ma,not advocating for him to cheat on his wife,,just an advice,,it's better he goes to olosho's house to satisfy his sexual urge than to live the mother of his kids to meet another lady all in the name of sex,since that's the problem with the man....

papaejima20199:
This is my first time posting NL , although I've been reading a lot in the last few months . I'll try to be as detailed as possible. I don't even know if I'm asking a question, or advice, or what. I just have to get some things out of my brain.

I’m 36 and my wife is 32. we've been married for 12 years and have two children, twins age 1. I would say happily married. As in, we don't fight, , never any abuse of any kind, no major life disagreements. I love my wife. She is a great mother, a great provider for the family, and we make a great team when it comes to raising our kids. However, she leaves me feeling undesired. Sexually, just intimacy in general, not feeling wanted or desired, missing that flirtatious quality that we all enjoy in a relationship. Our sex life has been on a steady decline, honestly since we got married. Less and less and less every year, and yes, kids make that even more difficult (and provide very easy excuses)

About 2 years ago, I was close to cheating. There was a girl at work that I flirted with often. We started hanging out , and we always seemed to end up talking, touching innocently, flirting, but nothing ever happened between us. The feeling this girl gave me inspired me to tell my wife how I was feeling, what I was missing, etc. I told her how important sex was to me, asked her what I could change, or if she needed to change something. Her response was that she "just didn't really think about it like you do" and that she would try to work on it. Well she didn't work on it, at all.

The flirty girl didn't work with me any more, and I lost that "flame" with her and let it go, and went about life as usual. I've been working a lot of hours over the last six months. I fell into this flirty relationship with one of my coworkers 22 and we just would have a lot of fun with one another. Mad sexual tension. A few months back things happen and she blows me. Its great. Best sex of my life. We set up plans to meet up off work hours and we do.

My coworker is in perfect shape. Its like my perfect woman. I love the way she loves me. She appreciates me, she satisfies me, she matches my sexual drive, and even exceeds it. She is everything I was missing in life, and I'm as happy as I've been in a long time. She is also crazy about me which feels unbelievable. Its been a while since someone has just wanted me to be happy and wanted to please me. I now consider her my girlfriend.

I don't wish to hurt my wife. But I do wish to be happy.

I do not wish for my children to grow up in a home with divorce. I want them to grow up with myself and my wife still being the team we've been so far, doing equal parts to take care of them, and always be there for them.

I realize a lot of what I'm saying are things that can't go together. I want to be with my girlfriend, I don't want to hurt my wife, and I don't want my kids to suffer . I can't have it all. Now I feel stuck

I need help because I can't seem to go through with this alone, and I have no one close enough with the time and level of trust that I can confide in, so I would really appreciate it if you'd offer me some advice.

Thanks for reading

Marry the second one join.

Men will always be men.

The wages of sin is death. Beware!!!

Omar09:


Before it used to be women who are always this emotional. You'd be surprised that 22yo is just scheming. That girl don't love you. With that said, let's now talk about the problem here, YOU. That sexual desire you are getting from that your side chic, you can get that from your wife. You lack the skills to get what you want from your wife. You see women conform to the present environment, so she being cold about sex could be you are cold about sex around her. You've gotten too comfortable and is she. She might be waiting for you to make the move. Just come back from work, lay on the bed in your room naked and when she walks in, tell her to show you what's she's got, she should make you climax. Of course she will be off guard and all, she might not do it, she might do it. She does it, fine, build on it, always put her up for work. Always make her do the sex thing... Arouse her in weird ways. Then if she didn't oblige to it which I'm 50% sure she won't, then tell her she's driving you outside. And watch the spark return.

Don't ever wife that 22yo girl, you'd realize you made a mistake if you do it.

Mature Advice.

@omar09, are u single?

DonEd:


Mature Advice.
@omar09, are u single?

Yeah. And I'm a dude.