I have this mental picture of having a home that gives peace of mind and none toxic. Place where morals and values are uphold, place where everyone take responsibilities over their actions,where no hypocrisy.Sense of worth and where honesty is a lifestyle,where respect and loyalty is earn not commanded,where I take the lead and lead by example.A home where I am not too proud to say sorry when I wrong,a home where material things is just a means to an end. Can there be such a home? Responsible responses are welcome.

Aren't you the dude that put the lady's pics on a thread? I hope you're not having cold feet after all you've said?

Most of the time on this forum, I say what I don't mean, and mean what I don't say.
But you've asked a serious question, and I'll reciprocate with a serious answer.

What you've described is an ideal that can be transformed into reality with the right partner. However, it requires discipline, hardwork and 100% commitment. 99% isn't enough.

Many marriages collapse because both parties aren't willing to put in the work.
Marriage is seen as an end in itself (achievement) instead of a means to an end (happiness).

Remember there's no perfect home. Human beings are social animals and because of that there's bound to be conflict. The quarrels aren't important. It's how you settle your differences and move on that counts.

At the end of the day, it's up to you and your spouse to find what works best for you guys and stick to it.

The litmus test of a marriage isn't the good days. It is the normal boring days. If you can figure out how to make those days enjoyable, you'll definitely have a peaceful home.

I have a lot more to say, but I'll stop here.

All the best.

ValCon888:
Aren't you the dude that put the lady's pics on a thread? I hope you're not having cold feet after all you've said?

Most of the time on this forum, I say what I don't mean, and mean what I don't say.
But you've asked a serious question, and I'll reciprocate with a serious answer.

What you've described is an ideal that can be transformed into reality with the right partner. However, it requires discipline, hardwork and 100% commitment. 99% isn't enough.

Many marriages collapse because both parties aren't willing to put in the work.
Marriage is seen as an end in itself (achievement) instead of a means to an end (happiness).

Remember there's no perfect home. Human beings are social animals and because of that there's bound to be conflict. The quarrels aren't important. It's how you settle your differences and move on that counts.

At the end of the day, it's up to you and your spouse to find what works best for you guys and stick to it.

The litmus test of a marriage isn't the good days. It is the normal boring days. If you can figure out how to make those days enjoyable, you'll definitely have a peaceful home.

I have a lot more to say, but I'll stop here.

All the best.

. Our love and relationship wax stronger than i ever thought,so I am truly bless, Falling in love with her is the best decision I ever made and aren't going back on it.She is truly amazing .Your opinions are thoughtful and generous. I take those words as an advice.

Jaubdu:
I have this mental picture of having a home that gives peace of mind and none toxic. Place where morals and values are uphold, place where everyone take responsibilities over their actions,where no hypocrisy.Sense of worth and where honesty is a lifestyle,where respect and loyalty is earn not commanded,where I take the lead and lead by example.A home where I am not too proud to say sorry when I wrong,a home where material things is just a means to an end. Can there be such a home? Responsible responses are welcome.

Yes there can be such a home even in this perilous times that we are in. But first, you have to seek God's help in helping you to find that partner who shares the same core moral values and have an amazing heart like yours. When you are married to such person, I tell you almost every other thing will be added....

Jaubdu:
I have this mental picture of having a home that gives peace of mind and none toxic. Place where morals and values are uphold, place where everyone take responsibilities over their actions,where no hypocrisy.Sense of worth and where honesty is a lifestyle,where respect and loyalty is earn not commanded,where I take the lead and lead by example.A home where I am not too proud to say sorry when I wrong,a home where material things is just a means to an end. Can there be such a home? Responsible responses are welcome.

The brutal truth is that you can't have it all.

Jaubdu:
. Our love and relationship wax stronger than i ever thought,so I am truly bless, Falling in love with her is the best decision I ever made and aren't going back on it.She is truly amazing .Your opinions are thoughtful and generous. I take those words as an advice.

Of course it will wax stronger now na.
The girl is from a relatively good home,has good prospects and all while you on the other hand is a hungry mofo.
I am sure you know too well that marrying her will come with a lot of treasure(settlement plan from the dad and mom in the uk)
So you be want hate her before?despite the fact that she is your only survival chance
See,if you make me vex,I go cast this thing for you.
I hope you know I know her personally?
No make me reason your matter.
I don tell you.

Of course you you can have such a home
Marry your friend and someone who have a good character from a morally upright home, and you will have a blissful home

Nwaneni

I know you too well.

Jaubdu:
. Our love and relationship wax stronger than i ever thought,so I am truly bless, Falling in love with her is the best decision I ever made and aren't going back on it.She is truly amazing .Your opinions are thoughtful and generous. I take those words as an advice.

There was this popular musician a doctor that divorced recently. I remember how love was shaking him then. How far today?

It takes more than love, all those butterflies feeling to make marriage work.
Marriage no easy.
In fact if you go in with high expectations you may end up dissapointed.
People that go in with least expectations survive more.

In addition the worst thing you can do is end up with a toxic spouse. You will hate yourself. So look very carefully oo

Logoobenz:
Of course it will wax stronger now na.
The girl is from a relatively good home,has good prospects and all while you on the other hand is a hungry mofo.
I am sure you know too well that marrying her will come with a lot of treasure(settlement plan from the dad and mom in the uk)
So you be want hate her before?despite the fact that she is your only survival chance
See,if you make me vex,I go cast this thing for you.
I hope you know I know her personally?
No make me reason your matter.
I don tell you.

Logo, why u wan cut this guy ticket now?

emmaodet:


Logo, why u wan cut this guy ticket now?

I dey want teach am how to run this thing e dey only talk.
E no go close mouth go lowkey for God's sake
Over legit dey cut work sometimes.

Living according to ones means Copy Copy

What is it about this your many post on marital expectations. Marriage changes nothing except you just got yourselves a new life time live-in partner. Live each day as it comes, be true to yourselves, and respect each other's boundaries. I pray you wouldn't be bringing up your issues online as it seems you think the only way to learn is to keep opening up threads.

Lol.

Jaubdu:
I have this mental picture of having a home that gives peace of mind and none toxic. Place where morals and values are uphold, place where everyone take responsibilities over their actions,where no hypocrisy.Sense of worth and where honesty is a lifestyle,where respect and loyalty is earn not commanded,where I take the lead and lead by example.A home where I am not too proud to say sorry when I wrong,a home where material things is just a means to an end. Can there be such a home? Responsible responses are welcome.

You make the bed that you lie in. From my observation, you have already started off on a wrong note. I anticipate your posts on NL someday, complaining like the husband below.

https://www.nairaland.com/5695646/wife-forgets-anniversary-does-she

This is a typical modern-day marriage between a weak man and a normal woman. He started off fawning over his wife, moved on to permitting his wife to dominate and ended up in complete bondage; seeking his wife's approval and lamenting over her neglect.

Btw in case you think you can always repair the marriage, this particular husband can never remedy that situation and neither will you if you start off on the wrong foot. In this case, she will never be a good wife. For a home to be in harmony, the potential wife's training needs to start from day 1; the day you meet.

Op it's all possible but alot depends on the woman u settle down with and if u are financially stable

Logoobenz:
Of course it will wax stronger now na.
The girl is from a relatively good home,has good prospects and all while you on the other hand is a hungry mofo.
I am sure you know too well that marrying her will come with a lot of treasure(settlement plan from the dad and mom in the uk)
So you be want hate her before?despite the fact that she is your only survival chance
See,if you make me vex,I go cast this thing for you.
I hope you know I know her personally?
No make me reason your matter.
I don tell you.

Logobenz free this guy na.