if they came for hospital appointment then as soon as it is done, they should go back home...and certainly not stay and make their home feel like camping site.

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

U are this quick to conclude just hearing from one side?...what happens to fair hearing?

instinct57vm:
I have a female friend who got married last year October precisely.

Fast forward to March this year the Mother In Law came to stay with the couple in a bid to visit her hospital within the couple’s area for medical checkup, reason being that she stays a bit farther away in the same state.

Upon her Mother in law’s arrival, she came with my friend’s husband brother accompanied by his girlfriend who all planned staying and eventually stayed without prior notice.

My friend(the lady) is a banker and was only informed casually by her husband while she was at work on the day of their arrival. His excuse was the mother called impromptu about the visit which I don’t think is bad anyway.

These couple stay in a three bedroom apartment and only one room has bed in it. This is the room the couple sleep.

The first two days of the mother inlaw, brother and brother’s girlfriend arrival, the couple had to sleep in the living room while the mother in law and the brother in law’s girlfriend slept in the couple’s room.

As days goes by, the husband who is self employed suggested the the rest of them will handle cooking in the house due to the wife’s tight schedule as per banking job in Lagos.

Part of the consequence of their visit is that they have overthrown the kitchen and like most ladies my friend wasn’t cool with this but tried to keep her cool.

The lady(my friend) became curious and asked the husband to clarify if the mother in law and co intends to stay with them permanently. The husband subsequently flared up with the allegations that his wife doesn’t want his people around. This happened to be the third time his wife asked this question in the space of two weeks.

One thing led to the other on the third time of asking this question my friends husband beat her up and chased her out of the house while the mother stood and watched without interfering.

Efforts to reconcile has proved abortive as the husband refused to let her in again and categorically said to my friend’s dad he isn’t interested in the marriage anymore. The mother in law refused to interfere.

PS: The hubby’s mother is a separated single mother.
PS: My friend and her hubby both contributed to pay the rent
PS: The hubby’s father is not in support of all the happenings and all efforts to reach his son proved abortive since the misunderstanding. He wouldn’t answer his dad’s calls.

What are your opinions about this issue? Thank you.

She shouldn't have married that asshole in the first place, she can't even talk to him and they obviously aren't even friends!

People should understand that we all pretend and put our best foot forward when dealing with strangers or people we feel might be useful to us in some way, ditto these relationships; so ladies need to stop getting married out of desperation or peer/family pressure, because they invariably end up worse off when marriages break. Men usually fare better socially, emotionally and psychologically after divorce.

When you tell these ladies to 'marry your friend' it sounds like gibberish. You meet a man and after six months of casual dating you're doing marriage counselling classes already. Reason why arranged marriages of the old days lasted longer and were more stable than these days, those were people who knew each other over decades!

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

Your type will mislead people into a dungeon. I do not support the man’s action neither do I side his mother for not interfering, purportedly wanting the marriage to be in disarray. However, you have to refrain from saying that ladies shouldn’t marry any guy who are so close to their mum. Point of correction, using myself as a case study, my mum practically made me what I am today. He toiled to the point of selling unsalable to ensure I have a good life. I will make sure my mum and wife coexist naturally in happiness but if my wife don’t my mother in my house, then I don’t know what will happen. So help me God.

Two sides to a story..can't be as simple and you just typed it here..

What the OP is silent about:

Two days yam don finish.
No soap again ( girlfriend don use am wash him clothes)
Wifey is thinking I'm very tired that stew that will last us 5 days is in the freezer ( she gets home pot is empty- we manage am chop small garri).
They keep sleeping in the parlour
The lack of privacy continues.
Wifey gets home late has to prepare food for three extra people ( worse when those people don't eat the same thing)

Wifey will be grumbling inside and out.

Husband sees a frowning and nagging wife and hears complaints about wife ( she no cook for us before she go work, she no sweep before she go, she no greet anybody)

In African settings extra visitors is all on the wife,


But a wise person knows that if the wife is good all this people go soon fight among themselves. (That is if the extra girl is not for the husband and they were not just trying to chase the wife in the first place)

instinct57vm:
I have a female friend who got married last year October precisely.

Fast forward to March this year the Mother In Law came to stay with the couple in a bid to visit her hospital within the couple’s area for medical checkup, reason being that she stays a bit farther away in the same state.

Upon her Mother in law’s arrival, she came with my friend’s husband brother accompanied by his girlfriend who all planned staying and eventually stayed without prior notice.

My friend(the lady) is a banker and was only informed casually by her husband while she was at work on the day of their arrival. His excuse was the mother called impromptu about the visit which I don’t think is bad anyway.

These couple stay in a three bedroom apartment and only one room has bed in it. This is the room the couple sleep.

The first two days of the mother inlaw, brother and brother’s girlfriend arrival, the couple had to sleep in the living room while the mother in law and the brother in law’s girlfriend slept in the couple’s room.

As days goes by, the husband who is self employed suggested the the rest of them will handle cooking in the house due to the wife’s tight schedule as per banking job in Lagos.

Part of the consequence of their visit is that they have overthrown the kitchen and like most ladies my friend wasn’t cool with this but tried to keep her cool.

The lady(my friend) became curious and asked the husband to clarify if the mother in law and co intends to stay with them permanently. The husband subsequently flared up with the allegations that his wife doesn’t want his people around. This happened to be the third time his wife asked this question in the space of two weeks.

One thing led to the other on the third time of asking this question my friends husband beat her up and chased her out of the house while the mother stood and watched without interfering.

Efforts to reconcile has proved abortive as the husband refused to let her in again and categorically said to my friend’s dad he isn’t interested in the marriage anymore. The mother in law refused to interfere.

PS: The hubby’s mother is a separated single mother.
PS: My friend and her hubby both contributed to pay the rent
PS: The hubby’s father is not in support of all the happenings and all efforts to reach his son proved abortive since the misunderstanding. He wouldn’t answer his dad’s calls.

What are your opinions about this issue? Thank you.

My verdict:
The man, his mother, the brother and his girlfriend are irresponsible fellows. But I pity the girlfriend the most. I also pity the man.

oglalasioux:
They brought another wife for your friend's husband. The girlfriend of mother inlaw's brother is actually a new wife for your friend's husband. They were just waiting for the perfect time to throw your friend out.

Some mothers are made by the devil himself.

You may just have a point. Nollywood Patience Ozokwor tins

Husband needs to grow up, if he loves his wife.
Communicate with ur wife as if all ur life depend on it. Communication is very key.

it's a fresh marriage, try and make it work..

instinct57vm:
I have a female friend who got married last year October precisely.

Fast forward to March this year the Mother In Law came to stay with the couple in a bid to visit her hospital within the couple’s area for medical checkup, reason being that she stays a bit farther away in the same state.

Upon her Mother in law’s arrival, she came with my friend’s husband brother accompanied by his girlfriend who all planned staying and eventually stayed without prior notice.

My friend(the lady) is a banker and was only informed casually by her husband while she was at work on the day of their arrival. His excuse was the mother called impromptu about the visit which I don’t think is bad anyway.

These couple stay in a three bedroom apartment and only one room has bed in it. This is the room the couple sleep.

The first two days of the mother inlaw, brother and brother’s girlfriend arrival, the couple had to sleep in the living room while the mother in law and the brother in law’s girlfriend slept in the couple’s room.

As days goes by, the husband who is self employed suggested the the rest of them will handle cooking in the house due to the wife’s tight schedule as per banking job in Lagos.

Part of the consequence of their visit is that they have overthrown the kitchen and like most ladies my friend wasn’t cool with this but tried to keep her cool.

The lady(my friend) became curious and asked the husband to clarify if the mother in law and co intends to stay with them permanently. The husband subsequently flared up with the allegations that his wife doesn’t want his people around. This happened to be the third time his wife asked this question in the space of two weeks.

One thing led to the other on the third time of asking this question my friends husband beat her up and chased her out of the house while the mother stood and watched without interfering.

Efforts to reconcile has proved abortive as the husband refused to let her in again and categorically said to my friend’s dad he isn’t interested in the marriage anymore. The mother in law refused to interfere.

PS: The hubby’s mother is a separated single mother.
PS: My friend and her hubby both contributed to pay the rent
PS: The hubby’s father is not in support of all the happenings and all efforts to reach his son proved abortive since the misunderstanding. He wouldn’t answer his dad’s calls.

What are your opinions about this issue? Thank you.

The husband didn’t try at all. I have a lot to say but let me keep quiet cos I’m angry right now. I wish I were the wife’s brother

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

Being his wife doesn't in any way makes you his mother. You have a significant role so does his mum.
Hope you are not one of those that don't wish to meet their mother-in law?

The mother in-law and co was on a mission, they where only waiting for the bubble to burst and it happened, pain is a gift, good luck to her, she left there alive .

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

Really?
Where exactly do you want to see a guy that's not closed to his mother?

The Mother is a trouble maker and I just blame the son for not keeping her mother in check. Your wife is your wife, your mother is your mother keep the both in check and be neutral. Put yourself in that Woman's shoe and check if you will be happy if someone else do the same to You. If I am a Lady I will take time to study my mother in-law before going into any marriage because they can make ones marriage a hell on Earth.

Right now the mother have bought the mind of the son, the only thing that can be done is to reach out to two or three people that the guy highly respect to talk sense into him and accept his wife back into his matrimonial home and gradually and amicable discharge his mother and siblings .

Your girl is still going yo get more beatings as time goes on. Although, her approach might have been wrong but for goodness sake, she is in for it with that kind of family and her husband.

instinct57vm

Your friend got married to her husband towards the end of 2019? Barely 6 six months after their wedding, they pulled money together to rent a 3 bedroom apartment?

Wait, what was she thinking when she made that contribution for a 3 bedroom apartment??

The two empty bedrooms are meant for who?? Ghosts?

People sef.


The husband's action is completely irrational and out of place though. He's not a responsible person. Doesn't matter what his wife said to him or his family. There are many ways to make your woman feel very very sorry and remorseful over what she's said/done. I mention this because I'm sure the wife must have said terrible things to the man and his mother (of course, she won't tell you @OP, the story teller).

Anyhow, mama should return to her house (even if going back to her husband is no longer an option). It is well.

The first problem is that the couple left there matrimonial bed for family. This is 100% improper....

The husband is not man enough.

It is not everybody that has stupid useless mothers who have chosen to be insensitive about their children's marital lives. Come on, there is no scenario on earth some of our mothers would act like that. There is also no scenario where some men would be insensitive to their partners' needs. I don't see how a newly wed man with common sense, understanding the constraints he finds himself will choose to accommodate a man, his gf plus his mother in a house with just one bed.

solmus:



may you witness same as a mother, may your son treat you the same way you suggest someones mother be treated... may you son's wife also keep asking for when you would leave the house of the child you spent every penny you begged for online to train say amen if you agree to your own comment

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

Fvck u bitch! No guy will marry or choose a hoe over his mother in the first place.

instinct57vm:
I have a female friend who got married last year October precisely.

Fast forward to March this year the Mother In Law came to stay with the couple in a bid to visit her hospital within the couple’s area for medical checkup, reason being that she stays a bit farther away in the same state.

Upon her Mother in law’s arrival, she came with my friend’s husband brother accompanied by his girlfriend who all planned staying and eventually stayed without prior notice.

My friend(the lady) is a banker and was only informed casually by her husband while she was at work on the day of their arrival. His excuse was the mother called impromptu about the visit which I don’t think is bad anyway.

These couple stay in a three bedroom apartment and only one room has bed in it. This is the room the couple sleep.

The first two days of the mother inlaw, brother and brother’s girlfriend arrival, the couple had to sleep in the living room while the mother in law and the brother in law’s girlfriend slept in the couple’s room.

As days goes by, the husband who is self employed suggested the the rest of them will handle cooking in the house due to the wife’s tight schedule as per banking job in Lagos.

Part of the consequence of their visit is that they have overthrown the kitchen and like most ladies my friend wasn’t cool with this but tried to keep her cool.

The lady(my friend) became curious and asked the husband to clarify if the mother in law and co intends to stay with them permanently. The husband subsequently flared up with the allegations that his wife doesn’t want his people around. This happened to be the third time his wife asked this question in the space of two weeks.

One thing led to the other on the third time of asking this question my friends husband beat her up and chased her out of the house while the mother stood and watched without interfering.

Efforts to reconcile has proved abortive as the husband refused to let her in again and categorically said to my friend’s dad he isn’t interested in the marriage anymore. The mother in law refused to interfere.

PS: The hubby’s mother is a separated single mother.
PS: My friend and her hubby both contributed to pay the rent
PS: The hubby’s father is not in support of all the happenings and all efforts to reach his son proved abortive since the misunderstanding. He wouldn’t answer his dad’s calls.

What are your opinions about this issue? Thank you.

Old wives tale for.twitter and instagram.

It is not her family. Her family would not come impromtu and she would have planned for it WITH her husband. Someone like my mum would never agree at all without a very good reason.

Also, it is her money. Not all bankers are earning 6 figures.

gentle70:
That's your friend's (wife) part of the story... She'll definitely tell you the story in a way that favours her (that won't make her guilty). There's more to it that she may have refused to tell you. By the way, if the wife is a banker... how much is FOAM that she can't buy in order to improvise and manage pending the time her in-laws will leave? Assuming it was her relatives that came visiting, I'm sure that this kind of topic will not originate from your friend. Ladies matter is a course of study on it's own.

Even a Court will hear from both parties before advising/making necessary judgement. Unless I hear from both parties... I rather remain on the fence.

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

My wife's elder sister lived with us for about two years before she got an apartment and moved out, there was no single day that I complained. Currently, my wife's three nephews who are all 15 yeas and above have been living with us for about three years now, yet there has not been any major disagreement on this issue.

Why do wives always have problems with their husband's family? Simple, women are devilish. Yes, I said what I said. Wherever the devil is too busy to go, he sends a woman.

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

The main reason I left a nine year relationship. Anything mama say na final plus mummy is a single mother.

There's no vendetta anywhere. Leave all this happenings they have been and will always be. Just follow your heart and your God and get married.

Ningen:
Shit. Is like there's a vendetta on Nairaland to discourage single folks from getting married.

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

just look at the nonsense you typed

Millenniumlady:
The man just played himself he'll leave to regret the curse of his actions.......how dare you take side With your mother when i'm your wife which automatically makes me your new mum ......Ladies never you marry a guy that's so close to his mum if you want a successful marriage.

She just marry a boy without any iota of sense in him. Isn't an issue of closeness to his mother. I'm very close to my mother more than anyone on the surface of earth but never allow her makes or influence my decision, I know when to draw the between my mom and my relationship.
Let her just move on.

benjijosh:
No one is talking about the brother inlaw and his girlfriend.. 2weeks for an impromptu stay..

com'n, my mum could stay that long but not my brother and the supposed girlfriend. I'm married and I need space, so does my wife too.

Forget the story is one-sided or not, the husband should respect his wife space too.

Thank you. How many men reason like you. May God help us in this institution called marriage.

Is there anything good in marriage?

Bj5all:
It's actually more than this @op. Alot would have happened than stated. No man in his right senses[b][/b] will beat and chase the woman he spent time and money to marry all because she asked a vital question that will help build a healthy home.

It will be difficult to give good advise until you hear from both sides.

You are right.....NO MAN IN HIS RIGHT SENSES.....hope ur not unaware that we do the most terrible things when we are not in our right senses....and it happens now and then buddy....there is a word for it....SENSELESS!

Cant advise until i hear both parties, but if this story is anything to go by..
Why the heck will my mum come with my brothers girlfriend? For what? Maybe they brought a new wife for the man. Clearly the mum does not like the banker wife, thats why she didnt say anything while his son was beating up the woman.

Surely you are not married,so in your mind a husband would write offically to his wife informing her that his family members want to visit.atlist she was notified and in some cases even the husband self no dey get notice.the fact remains if it was the wifes mother the wife wouldnt have a problem with it but once it is the husbands family most women behaving like evils spirit.i can remember a day when my wife came to me to tell me that her pastor said my mother was a witch,i am not an abusive man but she got what was coming,i told her that she should pass it on to her pastor and that would be the last sunday she would attend that church or pack out.it is the same,she feels everything in the house should be given to her family like they own it but your family shouldnt even come around.it is like they are on assignment to liquidate you for there family.



quote author=baralatie post=89255430]
the problem is not in staying at all.
it is the keeping the [b.wife in limbo[/b] and the unablement of the husband to put what the issues are to the wife in a very simple English
then there is the void between the husband mom dad and brother.
there is a problem that is hidden in this story
[/quote]