Society today especially in Africa look at single mothers as outcasts i.e those who had kids out of wedlock. But have u ever stopped to realize she is being ridiculed because she decided to be unselfish and accept reproach for doing the right thing. she decided to give an innocent soul which though was a product of her past mistakes a chance of life, halting, distabilizing & making her own life hard by her decision. This thread pays respect to all such single mums on NL. U are unsung heroines. I respect ya!

Ladies who abort and keep aborting their babies are often seen outwardly as smart and easily blend in with the crowd as wifey materials, however the lady with a good concience who gave up her status and good girl image in order to protect a life is castigated as "second hand" and is often rejected by men cos of her baggage. The truth is this lady ought to be viewd differently because she has a pure, caring heart and would rather face consequences than cover her sins. Guys need to start seeing dem this way

yeah its so true, i think there should be greater respect as well for single dads, cos they had the chance to RUN but didnt.

Is the OP assuming that all single moms are as a result of women having kids out of wedlock? There are also other circumstances such as death and divorce that lead to this situation.

kreamstaff:

yeah its so true, i think there should be greater respect as well for single dads, cos they had the chance to RUN but didnt.

@op,wld u marry one?

cold:

@op,wld u marry one?

Good Question.

cold:

@op,wld u marry one?

Lets now hear a series of "It depends . . . "

Bawss1:

Is the OP assuming that all single moms are as a result of women having kids out of wedlock? There are also other circumstances such as death and divorce that lead to this situation.

No am not asuming that, i am specifically talking about the unmarried lady who was adandoned by a man cos of pregnancy, had the chance & resources to abort it, yet decided the child must live. it takes 1 with a good heart to do so

The truth
is this lady ought to be viewd
differently because she has a
pure, caring heart and would
rather face consequences than
cover her sins. Guys need to
start seeing dem this way.
I HOPE DIZ IS NOT A TAP @ D BACK 4 DEM 2 KIP PRODUCING BASTARDS ?

cold:

@op,wld u marry one?

YES i would if i met and fell in love with one. Many men marry witches, secret call girls, play girls, some even father other mens children unknowingly, perhaps to them ignorance is bliss, however the truth is many of such ladies bring a curse into the home for hiding their sins, while the repentant single mum brings a blessing. She is a better deal and deserves more respect and love for being hones

@Poster,

Single motherhood is not the norm. Circumstances cause single motherhood.

People must discourage single motherhood or single fatherhood whenever possible because both parents must take responsibility and show resilience in times of difficulty. Separation and divorce may not always be the right answer.

There are consequences in any decision we make as adults.

Life of togetherness and sharing (not selfishness) is better for all.

There is no doubt that difficult and challenging times will come.

when i came up i was focused on African single mums, of course i know this thread might not make a lady about to abort change her mind. i just want those dat decide to keep it be asured they did the right thing.
I aint giving a tap at the back 4 keeping bastards, the UK & US govt are already doing dat by giving benefits, council houses etc. to such, making many ladies actually get pregnant for this reason in those places. However in Naija & other Afro countries they expect to be abandond yet keep the baby

I happen to be one. Thanks for the compliments! it takes ONLY the Grace of God, as there are so many challenges. Lol

say yes or sorry say no 2
ABORTION.

To answer your question, as already mentioned by previous posts, some single mothers happens as a result of broken down relationships and difficult circumstances. Those should be supported and commended for doing the job of two people. However, I have a problem with single motherhood where young teenage girls see it as a lifestyle choice. This without any doubt has led to dysfunctional children who themselves are a product of inadequate parenting skills by their single-parent mothers. You only need to take a look at what is happening within the black community in the UK where this is very rife. Some of these children up in gangs and the consequences as we all know are mostly fatal and end up in tears. The faimly unit comprising of mother, father and children should be celebrated. Society needs to do more to enourage it instead of making it easier for couples to go their separate ways for the flimsiest of reasons championed especially by those who forever are pushing through their feminist and so called liberal agenda.

awa17:

I happen to be one. Thanks for the compliments! it takes ONLY the Grace of God, as there are so many challenges. Lol

I salute your courage, you are a real Mother, even if peeps look down on u just stand strong for surely there will be a great reward and blessings galore through the same life u preserved. Am proud of u

Thank you, Swiftycool, for this thread.  

I doff my hat in total admiration and respect to single mothers. They are indeed unsung heroines.  

@swiftlycool. Thanks

@Naija4life, your words are true as i see it daily around me. However, i am hoping that thru this thread dejected single mums who have hitherto looked upon their kids as big mistakes made, will wise up, take responsibility and make sure they turn them out to become good upstanding citizens in future and not hoodrats. The message is to go and sin no more, if u made the mistake already work on it and turn it around to something to be proud of. God is with u

@Missy, u are wellcome dear

What about single mums with 4 kids from 4 men,do they also fall into this category of 'unsung heroines'

Or moms with kids for unknown men? Maybe quickie at the parking lot of a club?

cold:

What about single mums with 4 kids from 4 men,do they also fall into this category of 'unsung heroines' 

The truth is that she can abort the children but she did'nt

dayokanu:

Or moms with kids for unknown men? Maybe quickie at the parking lot of a club?

she said no to abortion

If we have any of them around with good intentions, fear of God and ready to start life all over, please contact me if you can. This may appear to be a joke though. I rest my case here.

Regards

Being a single mother shouldn't be seen in the light of dishonour, first I believe it's a choice, she has an alternative which is cheap and secretive but she chooses to bear the brunt.
Is my saying kudos to her, Yes! It takes the heart of those that understand Life to really safe one and God is most happy with them.

the bible says he that conceal his sins shall not prosper, but them that confess shall have mercy, is apparent that she decide to confess to the whole world that she has be fornicating, and God shall pardon her, give her a beautiful baby, free of sickness and a beauty to gladdens her heart, are my asking the next lady leading into abortion ward to stop? Maybe! That guy might be the president of the whole world tomorrow, consider Obama Biography, do you think, there was a legit marriage in-between/ I can't say! But a trust less.

Consider my word my son, consider you way hold fast to that which is truth and tomorrow shall be bright, People look at tomorrow with a distant view, tomorrow starts today.

Are my a victim? YES! Am, I stood and today, My Baby looks very much like me.
He that thinks he stands let him look back, No one is righteous, No Not one, the one I would have pointed, said,” He is NOT”. You know who I am talking about.

chines4:

The truth is that she can abort the children but she did'nt

she said no to abortion

Well that point wont fly with me cos I am pro choice, Better abort the child than bring another human to the wortld whom you cant properly care for and ends up turning to a menace.

Whats the use of saying no to abortion but living off govt aid and living in a project where the child is introduced to drugs at age 8

@cold & Dayo, i see where u are coming from, its quite clear that these happen often in countries where there is Govt support. A lady who gets pregnant just in a bid to get child support from men, a Govt. paid flat & other benefits per child while sitting her lazy @ss home doing nothing is just an opportunist common in western nations. U rarely see African women wit no support fitting the description of single mum multiple dads, they often wised up after d first. Now u hav a clearer view of who am on about

Single mum's with 1 child from a teen pregnancy who are brave enough to say NO to abortion,adoption and child abandoning are definitely heroes.I wud always respect such ladies.

Single mothers with 2 or more children from same or different fathers are however a diffrent issue,good for them anywayz but there is nothing to celebrate or admire there.They have been there once so its expected of them to make and stick with PLAN B/better decisions.

@Adeboo,Respect and lots of love!!!

Males are affected differently by the absence of a father than females are. A boy needs a male role model in his life so that he can learn how to become a man. Children who don't have good role models often choose negative, unsavory characters to mold themselves after. These children become susceptible to many of the dangerous risks associated with children who are raised by teenage parents. "Males that grow up in one-parent homes may gain negative personality traits like immaturity, laziness, and disrespect for women (Meurer, Meurer, & Holloway,1996)."

Females who grow up without fathers in the home usually end up having pre-marital sex (Hinckely, 1998). " They subconsciously want to make up for the affection that they didn't receive from their fathers. They become too dependent on men because they want someone who can replace their father. These women usually don't know how to relate to other males and they have the wrong idea about what a relationship should be like

http://singleparentsnetwork.com/Articles/Detailed/26.html

My thing is avoid situations that bring about more problems to the society?  Given the problems associated with single parenthood,  The numbers is still increasing alarmingly. That cant be a mistake again. Look at the example below

A high school in Memphis is suffering from a teenage pregnancy epidemic after approximately 90 of its students fell pregnant or have recently given birth.

The startling rate of teen births at Frayser High School fall in line with the high teen pregnancy rates in the entire Frayser community

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1347241/Teen-mom-epidemic-NINETY-teenage-girls-pregnant-Memphis-High-School.html

i see nothing is going on in NL today.

dayokanu,

Single mothers in the west essentially have no stigma and have comparative to Africa a soft cushion to land on in terms of welfare benefits.

You really cannot compare the two.

As it concerns it happening twice Ifyalways don't you know how deceptive we are as well as what good actors we are. It always never ceases to suprise me how our guys can be so supposedly loving, generous, sensitive, compassionate  etc, etc until pregnancy and then we do a Jekyll and Hyde with denials that would win Oscars.

Either way I respect and admire these TRUE MOTHERS.

single mom shud bhav demself. There are dudes interested to have dem for marriage. Age isnt on their side now