Sotland:



Different strokes for different forks. For me, any DIL who can't manage her MIL has a questionable character. It amuse me how today's girls are so quick to judging their MIL from afar. Pathetic.

mariahAngel:

Of course.



Peace wu ultimate o!




I believe animals make old people live longer.
They’re good company.



Ha si a wu’m nne nna nna’m.
My late grandfather treated me special...a bit than the others.



Gi e chere aka nara okwaya?



They actually love them.
I learnt from my grandfather not to treat animals badly.
One time, my grandfather’s goats went grazing by themselves, but when they came back in the evening, he counted them and found out they were incomplete.
He said the missing one must have lost his way home, and it was already getting dark.
My grandfather took his flashlight to go look for the missing goat, and he did not return till he found it.
Every time I remember it, it reminds me of that parable of the lost sheep.



True.

Munzy14:


E ji hu m peace of mind Egwuriegwu o...It is a huge determinant for longevity and achievement.

Old people understands life more as they age...Anyi nwa o ka na efe godi anyi efe n'isi..

Do you believe in Reincarnation?

Ehe nu naa..E ji m a nara o..O nwere onye e tinyere sugar na onu ya gbupu ya..
As a little boy then i collect...But mgbe toro, I was the one giving her till she passed on..Uwa wu give and take.

My grandma feeds her local birds like normal Agric ones....She simply hits empty cup and u need to see the race from all angle...The birds in the bush will race down to feed...

It reminds me of Ivan Pavlov experiment...for conditioned reflex action.

Ndi mpa na mma wu coded scientists..

mariahAngel:

Of course.




When you get close to them, you learn more about life from them.



I never used to take it serious, but I think I kind of do now.
I once thought we all might be old souls in new bodies, but I’m not sure.




Gi were zuru akara taa.



I believe every living thing has intelligence, including plants...how much more animals.

Scientists kwa?

descarado:

Vicious circle.
When husbands don't care for their wives , they turn all the love and attention to their sons. When son finally become man and relationship with husbands have ended to housemates or the man is dead, the mum wouldn't want to come to terms that her small boy is now and adult who need his freedom. You talk, she will come with emotional blackmail and crocodile tears

Boy/man will look back and yes, she was there for me so I must think of her first, any other person is secondary.

That's how more than 70% of men find themselves in this situation. And guess what?
They repeat the same stuff their dad did to their wives. Already,mum first wifey, you are on you own. Wifey will join herself with her new son.
And the circle continues.

Munzy14:

True...

O nwere ihe mere i jiri take wa ya serious? Or did you found yourself doing somethings the former life does?

Yes, my dad will say so...We are old souls in a new body...Those that are powerful before will still remain powerful...

Like mine, my grandpa was an only son to his father..so he faced too many struggles...He said next life...He will have brothers and they will not joke with him...

A lot he said...of which even my uncles can testify..

A lot of them say their sons na same...but mpa m si my own wu more authentic...as those ones na only sons in their nuclear family..

The whole thing made me start believing.....Too many things to keep heads up.

Akara, fried fish,bread, coconutpie etc....childhood snacks.. we buy and eat under staircase ..

Chai...Me and my brothers we disturb eeh...Just hide make momsy no catch u..

I laugh reminiscing childhood...mad fun..

Yes plants are intelligent and even communicates.....

If you live in serene environment you will appreciate nature.

mariahAngel:


Me? No.
It was about one of my maternal uncles. When his wife was pregnant with their second son, someone appeared to her in the dream and told her I’m back!
She got scared, but didn’t tell anyone.

Then my uncle (the husband) and his younger brother happened to have similar dreams about someone telling them I’m back!
One thing led to another, and they found themselves discussing their dreams, and were surprised how similar the dreams were.
It turned out that they had an elder brother who fought in the Biafran war but never returned (they never found his body to bury).
So, they concluded it was him.
Even today, my uncle calls that his son Nwannennaya.



I wu diokpara?




Coconut pie? I have never heard of it.
Ngwa share the recipe.



In a natural environment like the village is where I belong.
The truth is, not everybody that lives in the city is meant to be there.
As I am, I can never dream of traveling abroad. Too far from home.

ImaIma1:


What if it is the MIL that has a questionable character? If her own children cannot manage her, why would the daughter inlaw be accused of a questionable character for not managing her.

What you should know is that MILs are human beings, they were also young girls before. So they too have faults. They can manipulate and play tricks. I speak from experience.

I never planned not to be close to mine, but it's inevitable.

Sotland:


If MIL has a questionable character, she will exhibit it while the DIL is courting her husband.. Nevetheless, all I am saying is that the young girls of today should stop judging MIL from afar. Because of the odd stories they hear and read, they are quick to rejecting MIL from afar.. In African context, Marriage is not BTW Husby and wifey, It is BTW two families.. Well, Women have problem for their kind. Practically three men can live in a single room for 6yrs without no problem but three women cannot live in a single room without no problem, they must have issues.. But the truth is DIL should honor her MIL cos times shall come when she will be become MIL too...

ImaIma1:


Personally, I don't think there should be any mystery about MILs. It's not only the young ladies that judge the mother inlaw from afar. The MIL also puts up a front even before meeting the DIL.

The fault doesn't always lie with the DIL like some of you make it seem. Older people should not be given a pass just because of their age. When they are wrong, let it also be pointed out. MILs should also learn to accept their DILs and stop trying to interfere.

Sotland:



Do I hear you say interfere? So if the Son is dieing silently, the parents shouldn't interfere but watch their DIL send their son to early grave? That's funny.. Like it or not, there is always someone to mediate btw husby n wifey..

Like I said before women or women problem.. if DIL could love, cherish and honour her mother irrespective of her flaws, I see no reason why DIL shouldn't honour love, cherish and honour her MIL. If DIL don't want her MIL close, she doesn't honor her, so two ways about it. BTW I say, Africans have derail from their culture and adopting the wrong side of the western culture or not applying it properly and that has been a huge problem in this part of the word..

bukatyne:


Very much on point

It is a loveless marriage that would make a MIL start dragging with her DIL over who is more important to the son.

If she has her husband alive and in a good relationship with him, mama would be thinking of how to rest and enjoy her husband.

If her husband is dead and she was happy with him, she wants to spend her days cherishing the memories they built.

Same MIL suddenly knows how to comport herself in her daughter's house.

It is well with them all.

Munzy14:

Wow..That was deep...My dad calls me Nnannaya...He said his Dad had special like on him...When I was given birth to, he wasn't there...Went on a special duty...So he returned to visit us in the hospital... on sighting me, I held his hands..at just few days old......Mpa m wu onye akuko...Onye kochara anyi otu o si hu mma mu, gbaya TT...Their courtship days etc...

Then one of my bro, is ogonnaya...They said its my maternal grandpa.

Smh...I am first....E chekwa m ma ima....

Yes coconut pie was a junk snack we had then in my hood...Its like rectangle shaped and fluffy like smaller bread...They use coconut oil on it like we have in vanila for flavour..

Then a set is 160naira...

For 10pcs...very cheap...My dad will say mgbe ihe di mma...

Hmmmm, Interesting to know...I love serene Environment...Maybe that influenced my passion for Agro life..

So Ihu Di shi abroad, i ga ahu ekwe?

Rozcol:
Go and rent a place for you and your wife alone before you pave way for seeds of discord between them.I can never agree to live with a mother in-law no matter how good she is,never.

Rubbiish:

U want someone to leave his own house & become a tenant simply because he wants to get married? Can u afford one bag of cement?
Senseless thing!

nniero11:


So if his mother is old and can't help herself what would your husband do then??

Your comment is making my heart to bleed!

You can't live with someone that raised your husband

finally make God forgive me because na CONTRACT MARRIAGE I GO DO

AS A WOMAN YOU SHOULD BE ABLE TO LOVE YOUR HUBAND'S FAMILY JUST LIKE YOUR BIRTH FAMILY.

HUMANITY IS FINISHED!

frozen70:


You need to get married, live with your wife and your mother for just one year, then you will come back with a good point

okoroemeka:
I was in a such dilemma when I wanted to marry,we have six flags building with me and my mother and househelp occupying one,my wife bluntly refused even for us to shift to another flat,we lived together with my mother, and my wife was driving her to work every morning before going to school,it continued for six years before my mother died suddenly of stroke in 2006,they lived together happily like mother and daughter and I was privileged for her to name 3 of my children before she died,osodiemeaku RIP.

ImaIma1:


I am sure you know what I mean by interfere. Once a man is married, the mother has to respect the marriage and allow them be. She cannot come and make decisions in the house or exact any kind of authority.

If they need someone to mediate, shouldn't it be a neutral person, and not someone that would take sides? Definitely not his mum. The father is even better.

I for one respect my MIL. That's why I maintain a safe distance. Getting close to her is difficult because I have been burnt several times. Even she herself had to apologize to me when she was leaving our place after omugwo because she knew she offended me and I was cool about it.

For some people, respecting them is putting them at a distance so that you don't speak your mind and spoil everything. My FIL is the one I talk to more.

MummyD2020:


Lol, easier said than done. Its like u dont know that no matter what u do, some mother inlaw can never see u as their daughter. U think women like to just quarel with the mother of their husband? Its not all. Someone that keeps talking without control, what do u do? Give am chance to protect ur mental health. Trust me, i dont know about others but i believe women cant just start detesting their mother inlaw.

mariahAngel:


Your dad seems like a cool guy.
He relates with you guys like a friend.





Mba o!
The thing is, most guys that are firstborn make it quite obvious, but you seem to take your brothers as your equal, which is good...as long as they respect you.



Considering how you described it, I don’t think coconut pie should be the appropriate name for it. Maybe coconut buns.

Owu ihe ha na a kpo ya, ka owu gi kporo ya otu ahu?




Far away from home and family? M begbuo onwe’m n’akwa!
I am too attached to family...especially my father’s side.

E chetara’m nne umere nne’m, she’ll always ask my mum why her children (we) don’t like staying with...even if it’s just abali ato
And she even spoils us more than my paternal grandmother o.

So, every time we would visit, when it’s time for us to go, she would beg us to stay. (My father’s village is one village away from my mum’s)
One time, I decided to be brave and stay with her for a few days (you should see how happy she was).
When I arrived, umuaka ama-oji that usually played in her compound treated me special o (she left me with them and went to the market)
They took me around, anyi piechaa ohia, ghorochaa mkpuru oshishi, but my mind was not at ease (I swear, the darker the day got, the more I wanted to run to my village. Smh! )

By night time, my grandmother was already back from the market with the maimai she bought me (by now, the feeling to go home had gotten worse)
As I was eating the maimai, tears were just pouring down my eyes (it was dark and I didn’t cry aloud so she wouldn’t hear me crying )
So, when she was talking to me I couldn’t answer because I was choked with holding back my cry, then she brought mpanaka and saw my face soaked with tears.
She asked me what the problem was, I could not tell her that I wanted to go home because I was ashamed and it was already late.
So, she kept asking whether it’s this or that, till she asked if I wanted to go back to my father’s place, then I nodded.
Then she called out another mma that is her friend (their compounds are opposite each other) and told her.
Then she told me to go get my stuffs, but kept yabbing me.
I didn’t mind, as long as I get to go home that night (I was already wondering how I would be able to sleep through that night. Just one night o!)
So, with the company of her friend, they took me back to our home.
When we got to a bush path that was dark, my grandmother threatened to leave me there so I reach home by myself, I begged her not to.
When we got to our compound, I slowed my pace because I was ashamed and they began to laugh at me, but I didn’t care much because I was home where I belong.
Then my grandmother greeted my paternal grandfather, and said to everyone lekwe ihe onu kporo!

The memory will always be fresh. I appreciate her for taking me home when I wanted to go, but I was later able to make it up to her by staying with her another time.

nniero11:


that your line "TALKING WITHOUT CONTROL" really got to me. i don laugh tire!

Tolerance is key! you can make some one that doesn't like you to like you. It requires time and skill though and this every woman should learn.


Just like you can never detest your birth mother no matter what don't detest your mother in-law too.

The truth is we humans have not come to grasp the true meaning of the word "LOVE"

Love is a very strong fortress that can withstand any attack. When some one deliberately tries to make you cry but you end up smiling and doing good in return to the person it will get to a point where he or she will begin to treat you with respect and adore you like a god. The only problem is can you endure the bullshit in the beginning?

Marriage is a beautiful thing but because of our crude nature arising from lack of love it is now a very deadly contraption which has killed many innocent people and has given out evil to our society.

The fish cannot survive outside the water and the plant can't live outside the soil but man a spiritual being wants to survive outside a deity.


HUMANITY HAS LOST IT ALL BY PLAYING GOD!

MummyD2020:


Experience is the best teacher. But watch how people that have not even dreamt of getting married in the next 10 years and beyond will flood this place with 'myopicism' lol

MummyD2020:


Experience is the best teacher. But watch how people that have not even dreamt of getting married in the next 10 years and beyond will flood this place with 'myopicism' lol

Munzy14:


Yes my dad is like our elder brother...We sit and gist like mates..lol..


Yea...I take them as my guys and not just younger ones...I made them to be comfortable with me...And the goto elder bro..
Again, people think my immediate younger bro is my twin or he is the elder one....when I show up, they will be like thats your younger bro...And he will be like mba oooo...onye toro m...with 3years sef...
A di m fresher by looks..Na beards go make it easy to believe i am his senior...


It's rare for anyone of them to hide things from me..
We don't do brother or dede..
My last born calls me by my name...More like guy how far...

In my hood then, it was the name coconut pie...baked o..not fried.

Hahahahahaha are you that very attached to family?
I feel when you have your own home, you will detach from family small....Like you move from a place where you receive love to a place you will own your home and distribute love..

chai you have big comfort in your zone right from young age.....The narrative was lit and garnished with right Igbo words...You do very well with Igbo writing...Igbo nwere f9 na waec..

Lol mpanaka chai...So you know that thing...In the village when we travel home for Christmas...people move about with it just like now we use torchlights.
ezigbote ha lekwe ihe onu kporo...My people luru umu nwaanyi ebe unu too much...And it made your dialect rampant in my village..it's rare to believe na ndi village m wu contry5..

With this your childhood story, I am even believing the reincarnation thing more on your behalf...You really belong to home.

mariahAngel:


As grownups, do you often disagree amongst yourselves?



Ok.




Owu mma’m kosuru the attachment





If I could, I’d love to write a book in Igbo...probably stories for children.




Maybe that is the reason you can understand my Igbo very well...I just know that whatever I write, you’ll understand, even if it’s in my dialect.




Okwaya?

MummyD2020:


Watch them come for ur head and call u wicked daughter inlaw, ignorantly.

Munzy14:

Due to confidence, They allow me lead...And I lead by example...Disagreement arises when the leader start acting like buhari..Nonchalant and insensitive.
Again I don't force things, I allow nature take it course...

Hehehe you learn to slow down..I hope family no deh influence your major decisions?

Why can't you? I mean the stories...If you think it, you can do it.

Lol...yea I understand very well...Ma national anthem unu...

mariahAngel:


Okay. That is good.



We were raised to be independent minded, but act responsibly.



Two reasons:
- I easily get bored (you need patience and diligence to complete a book)
- I procrastinate a lot. ( “Mgbe e mere, mgbe e mere” ma owuru mma’m )



A mahu’m maka ‘ke ahu o!

Munzy14:

That's good..It helps everyone stand very quick and firm.

Get bored kwa? I wu Aquarius..

Hmmm procrastination is bad o...mgbe emere anaghi e mechaa emecha...lol

O di mma na imahu...I choro ima ga juo Ada mbano...

mariahAngel:

Yeah.




Aquarius dey learn for where Sags dey when it comes to being bored easily.
Them no dey stay for one place for too long.
Why you think say I no dey like watch bbn?
For me to sit through a movie or series or anything, it has to be intriguing.




It’s a flaw.
I might leave one thing unfinished and start another one.




She overdid it.