What have I done to deserve this kind of betrayal....
I really feel so depressed cos of the betrayal that I have been through. So, I got married in 2018. My husband is a medical personnel in the US. When we got married, we started to work on my papers and it was not forth coming. So, I got a tourist visa to go and join him for a year while still working on permanent papers.
My husband is a very loving man and I bless God for him. Through out the first year of our marriage, we tried to get pregnant all through but nothing happened. I had to come back to home after my one year ended to apply again. while I was here, the pandemic and lock down happened. So, I could not go back to my husband for almost a year.We spoke everyday during the pandemic. Always telling each other that we miss each other. So after the lock down, I have been trying to get back to my husband. I have compiled all my papers and waiting for my husband to send me the necessary documents so I can include them in the application.
Since them, my husband has been giving me one excuse or the other for why he has not sent the documents. He said he has been busy, bla bla. I know his job keeps him busy yes but this his behavior is strange. I just began to get worried that he is not making this a priority. Sometimes, I will even call him and he will not answer.
I became worried and called his elder sister in US. She then told me she will call me back. Last month, she fixed a zoom meeting with me and my husband and it was in that meeting that my husband told me that he has something to confess to me. His voice was shaking. He knelt down and told me he has done something bad and wants me to forgive him.
He said he slept with a coworker during the lockdown and the lady is pregnant. That the lady told him that she was going to remove the pregnancy but he told her no because he has been looking for a baby since we got married. The lady said the only way she will keep the baby is if he will marry her, that she will not have a baby outside wedlock.That he told her he is already married but the lady said that is the only way she will keep the baby. So, that is why he has been avoiding bringing me back to the US. That he loves me and he does not want to let me go but he just wants the woman to have the baby and maybe later they can divorce when the baby is born and then I can come back to join him. I thought he and his sister were pulling my legs cos I just left the meeting and went to cry my eyes out. After several days of calling and me rejecting his call, my husband and I spoke and he still kept begging me. He swears that he will divorce the woman after she gives birth. That he just wants to make sure she keeps his child.
This whole thing makes me want to just end my marriage but I love my husband so much. He now calls me everyday, asking for forgiveness and I want to just try and see his reasoning but his reasoning is so selfish. Just because I have not had a baby in just three years of marriage. Just because I was not around during a pandemic…he has s8x with another woman and has a baby and marries her and he wants me to forgive him?
what kind of wickedness is this? Do I deserve this? My family is divided about this. Some members of my family want me to call it quits while some, want me to remain after all, he is still my husband. My husband wants to come back to Nigeria this summer to beg and make up but I don’t know id I want to see him. I don’t think the pain I feel will ever go away.
I loved and trusted this man. I don’t trust him anymore. I cannot even talk to him even though I love him so dearly. My heart has been shattered in pieces. Of what use is being married? Just to wait that he eventually divorces his US wife maybe in another 2 or 3 years? I really am heartbroken. If you were in my shoes, what will you do? Will you forgive and wait for such a man to divorce the other woman or would you move on? Please advise.

Tell him to marry her... whereas polygamy is allowed in all religion on fools kick against it. At least U have time to allow ur kpekus to rest since ba two Puna the man go get now...just saying

Cool story.

The man can handle both of you. Just work with him accordingly. Your grand pappies had multiple wives and they were able to put all of them in order and why is this so difficult for the Gen Xers and Zeers to understand that a man can be with many wives if he has his finances right.

[s]

Ochason:
What have I done to deserve this kind of betrayal....
I really feel so depressed cos of the betrayal that I have been through. So, I got married in 2018. My husband is a medical personnel in the US. When we got married, we started to work on my papers and it was not forth coming. So, I got a tourist visa to go and join him for a year while still working on permanent papers.
My husband is a very loving man and I bless God for him. Through out the first year of our marriage, we tried to get pregnant all through but nothing happened. I had to come back to home after my one year ended to apply again. while I was here, the pandemic and lock down happened. So, I could not go back to my husband for almost a year.We spoke everyday during the pandemic. Always telling each other that we miss each other. So after the lock down, I have been trying to get back to my husband. I have compiled all my papers and waiting for my husband to send me the necessary documents so I can include them in the application.
Since them, my husband has been giving me one excuse or the other for why he has not sent the documents. He said he has been busy, bla bla. I know his job keeps him busy yes but this his behavior is strange. I just began to get worried that he is not making this a priority. Sometimes, I will even call him and he will not answer.
I became worried and called his elder sister in US. She then told me she will call me back. Last month, she fixed a zoom meeting with me and my husband and it was in that meeting that my husband told me that he has something to confess to me. His voice was shaking. He knelt down and told me he has done something bad and wants me to forgive him.
He said he slept with a coworker during the lockdown and the lady is pregnant. That the lady told him that she was going to remove the pregnancy but he told her no because he has been looking for a baby since we got married. The lady said the only way she will keep the baby is if he will marry her, that she will not have a baby outside wedlock.That he told her he is already married but the lady said that is the only way she will keep the baby. So, that is why he has been avoiding bringing me back to the US. That he loves me and he does not want to let me go but he just wants the woman to have the baby and maybe later they can divorce when the baby is born and then I can come back to join him. I thought he and his sister were pulling my legs cos I just left the meeting and went to cry my eyes out. After several days of calling and me rejecting his call, my husband and I spoke and he still kept begging me. He swears that he will divorce the woman after she gives birth. That he just wants to make sure she keeps his child.
This whole thing makes me want to just end my marriage but I love my husband so much. He now calls me everyday, asking for forgiveness and I want to just try and see his reasoning but his reasoning is so selfish. Just because I have not had a baby in just three years of marriage. Just because I was not around during a pandemic…he has s8x with another woman and has a baby and marries her and he wants me to forgive him?
what kind of wickedness is this? Do I deserve this? My family is divided about this. Some members of my family want me to call it quits while some, want me to remain after all, he is still my husband. My husband wants to come back to Nigeria this summer to beg and make up but I don’t know id I want to see him. I don’t think the pain I feel will ever go away.
I loved and trusted this man. I don’t trust him anymore. I cannot even talk to him even though I love him so dearly. My heart has been shattered in pieces. Of what use is being married? Just to wait that he eventually divorces his US wife maybe in another 2 or 3 years? I really am heartbroken. If you were in my shoes, what will you do? Will you forgive and wait for such a man to divorce the other woman or would you move on? Please advise.

[/s]

Are you a baby?

US law won't just allow him divorce after birth secondly , he will pay child support etc

Third the fact is he can't divorce her after birth or anytime soon. He has wanted a baby since and has gotten one so he likely loved that woman and when the baby is born the love will grow.

What he feels for you is pity , guilt etc

I am so sorry dear ,I wish you strength for what is to come . I hope more of your Nigerian women learn to embrace court marriage and forget all these other ones... If you had done a court marriage your case will have been so simple I would have taught you how to Bleep him up but alas as a typical Nigerian woman it's traditional and white wedding he did for you and you assumed you were married..

Pele
PS I know this is a fake post but I am bored and can't sleep so let's keep fooling ourselves

Story story o
Storyyy
Alo alo o
Aloo

Fake ass story.

Make una ignore the fake story jare

Ask Annie 2baba wife howfa..

Ochason:
What have I done to deserve this kind of betrayal....
I really feel so depressed cos of the betrayal that I have been through. So, I got married in 2018. My husband is a medical personnel in the US. When we got married, we started to work on my papers and it was not forth coming. So, I got a tourist visa to go and join him for a year while still working on permanent papers.
My husband is a very loving man and I bless God for him. Through out the first year of our marriage, we tried to get pregnant all through but nothing happened. I had to come back to home after my one year ended to apply again. while I was here, the pandemic and lock down happened. So, I could not go back to my husband for almost a year.We spoke everyday during the pandemic. Always telling each other that we miss each other. So after the lock down, I have been trying to get back to my husband. I have compiled all my papers and waiting for my husband to send me the necessary documents so I can include them in the application.
Since them, my husband has been giving me one excuse or the other for why he has not sent the documents. He said he has been busy, bla bla. I know his job keeps him busy yes but this his behavior is strange. I just began to get worried that he is not making this a priority. Sometimes, I will even call him and he will not answer.
I became worried and called his elder sister in US. She then told me she will call me back. Last month, she fixed a zoom meeting with me and my husband and it was in that meeting that my husband told me that he has something to confess to me. His voice was shaking. He knelt down and told me he has done something bad and wants me to forgive him.
He said he slept with a coworker during the lockdown and the lady is pregnant. That the lady told him that she was going to remove the pregnancy but he told her no because he has been looking for a baby since we got married. The lady said the only way she will keep the baby is if he will marry her, that she will not have a baby outside wedlock.That he told her he is already married but the lady said that is the only way she will keep the baby. So, that is why he has been avoiding bringing me back to the US. That he loves me and he does not want to let me go but he just wants the woman to have the baby and maybe later they can divorce when the baby is born and then I can come back to join him. I thought he and his sister were pulling my legs cos I just left the meeting and went to cry my eyes out. After several days of calling and me rejecting his call, my husband and I spoke and he still kept begging me. He swears that he will divorce the woman after she gives birth. That he just wants to make sure she keeps his child.
This whole thing makes me want to just end my marriage but I love my husband so much. He now calls me everyday, asking for forgiveness and I want to just try and see his reasoning but his reasoning is so selfish. Just because I have not had a baby in just three years of marriage. Just because I was not around during a pandemic…he has s8x with another woman and has a baby and marries her and he wants me to forgive him?
what kind of wickedness is this? Do I deserve this? My family is divided about this. Some members of my family want me to call it quits while some, want me to remain after all, he is still my husband. My husband wants to come back to Nigeria this summer to beg and make up but I don’t know id I want to see him. I don’t think the pain I feel will ever go away.
I loved and trusted this man. I don’t trust him anymore. I cannot even talk to him even though I love him so dearly. My heart has been shattered in pieces. Of what use is being married? Just to wait that he eventually divorces his US wife maybe in another 2 or 3 years? I really am heartbroken. If you were in my shoes, what will you do? Will you forgive and wait for such a man to divorce the other woman or would you move on? Please advise.

Personally I'd forgive him as long as he's repentant and he ain't divorcing anyone after any childbirth. As he feels strong enough to marry 2 women, let it be so at least I am the first wife and perhaps the cries of a baby will open up my womb as well. Thats just me though, I don't like stress.

Just look at how selfish women can be. Sarah gave Haggai to father Abraham because she was getting old and couldn't bore him a son. That's how a respectful and selfless woman should be.
Sorry I am just trolling.

If u love your peace of mind woman. Then you better move on, ...
But if you have the strength to wait, cope with his baby mama drama and truly forgive him and forget about the "betrayal' of which I very much doubt. Then you can give it a try.

You better stay put with your marriage and just count it as your husband has a 2nd wife for now. The fact that he was honest about it upfront and you didn't have to find out 40 years later, or he just moved on and cut off from you permanently (after all, he had nothing to lose since you guys don't have children yet), shows me that it was truly a mistake and he was really sorry and remorseful. But keeping that baby is the right thing for him to do and for that lady insisting your husband must marry her first, shows she sees prospects in him and he's a great loving guy. Because no woman forces a nonsense man to marry her. Just endure, accept your new reality, forgive and love your husband. Abraham had 2 wives, Jacob did too, both due to unplanned circumstances, that's life. I know it's hard on you but another man would have easily dumped you and moved on, especially since you guys are not even in the same country. It's painful I know. May God heal your heart. Sorry! It was probably fear of childlessness that pushed him to it. Every man is usually anxious to have their baby soon after marriage. Not every man has the courage and faith to stay childless for 8 years without panicking or looking for alternative. He might have been secretly getting afraid that he was the problem, that he was impotent and the fear pushed him to try with someone else. Shit happens.

Marriage and its wahala sha.

miniziter:
Marriage and its wahala sha.

That is why it is good to be mature before marriage, marriage is so complicated.

Lo

Hmm

Trust...Trust

"I trust my wife, I trust my wife". I dont want to snoop on her phone.........and they are now bringing a bastard to the house....thanks to DNA

" I trust my husband, I trust my husband" I dont want to peep into his Whatsapp chats......and they are there fvcking their housemaids and Coworkers.

Fvck trust!!!!......once again a big thanks to DNA. The killer of trust.

Goldbw122:

That is why it is good to be mature before marriage, marriage is so complicated.

What's your definition of maturity please?

Assuming your story is true, I advice you to tell your husband to undo what he did first. How ? Let her abort and let him cut ties with her. From that point both of you must sit down and decide the best way to get a baby. I won't give you options but there are many. Good luck.

AutoChick4U:
Personally I'd forgive him as long as he's repentant and he ain't divorcing anyone after any childbirth. As he feels strong enough to marry 2 women, let it be so at least I am the first wife and perhaps the cries of a baby will open up my womb as well. Thats just me though, I don't like stress.

Are you really serious with this your comment? Do you really have this low self-esteem??

I mean I'm a guy but mentality like yours has kept women subjugated for all ages. Maybe you'll do the same thing like the husband if given the chance. But if not, have some respect for yourself lady. You deserve the best if you treat people right.

Goldbw122:

That is why it is good to be mature before marriage, marriage is so complicated.

so how long do you have to wait to be matured?what age do you think is matured enough?what type of maturity, financial, spiritual ,mental or physical maturity?do you know that age doesn't mature a fool,the lady should just forgive the man and move on and look for her own child,there is a limit to how long a man can beg

Please move on. He has nothing to offer you, unless you want to leverage on him and leave Nigeria, which isn't a bad thought going by the condition of Nigeria thanks to zombies like Apcharam

It might sound weird but this is the truth, the sooner the world embraces polygamy, the better it'll be for us all.

RedEnergy:
You better stay put with your marriage and just count it as your husband has a 2nd wife for now. The fact that he was honest about it upfront and you didn't have to find out 40 years later, or he just moved on and cut off from you permanently (after all, he had nothing to lose since you guys don't have children yet), shows me that it was truly a mistake and he was really sorry and remorseful. But keeping that baby is the right thing for him to do and for that lady insisting your husband must marry her first, shows she sees prospects in him and he's a great loving guy. Because no woman forces a nonsense man to marry her. Just endure, accept your new reality, forgive and love your husband. Abraham had 2 wives, Jacob did too, both due to unplanned circumstances, that's life. I know it's hard on you but another man would have easily dumped you and moved on, especially since you guys are not even in the same country. It's painful I know. May God heal your heart. Sorry! It was probably fear of childlessness that pushed him to it. Every man is usually anxious to have their baby soon after marriage. Not even man has the courage and faith to wait 8 years without panicking or looking for alternative. He might have been secretly getting afraid that he was the problem, that he was impotent and the fear pushed him to try with someone else. Shit happens.

yeah. mistake indeed. Like he fell and landed on an open vagina and nutted therein. Always giving a soft landing.

AutoChick4U:
Personally I'd forgive him as long as he's repentant and he ain't divorcing anyone after any childbirth. As he feels strong enough to marry 2 women, let it be so at least I am the first wife and perhaps the cries of a baby will open up my womb as well. Thats just me though, I don't like stress.

Your self esteem is an all time low. Sorry I had to say it.Always look out for your mental health and yourself cos the stressless path you chose is even more stressful.
That other lady after marriage will block communication from him. He'll only hide and call,is that how you'd want your child in Nigeria to be speaking to their married Daddy abroad?

He told you he was going to divorce her after she gives birth, and you believed

A doctor in the US knows the baggages that come with divorcing the mother of your child, all that spousal support and child care support, he will reck

He knows all of these, so he ain't divorcing her anytime soon, not even till Jesus comes, cos when baby enter, the story go change, the love for her will grow spontaneously, even if he divorce her for you, you might probably not enjoy your marriage again, cos do you know why, OKAFOR'S LAW what has been fuckeeed before can still be fuckkeed again, on your matrimonial bed, your husband will fuckkk that his baby mama, that's if he even divorce her for you.

Consult your village elders for more advise

Ochason:
What have I done to deserve this kind of betrayal....
I really feel so depressed cos of the betrayal that I have been through. So, I got married in 2018. My husband is a medical personnel in the US. When we got married, we started to work on my papers and it was not forth coming. So, I got a tourist visa to go and join him for a year while still working on permanent papers.
My husband is a very loving man and I bless God for him. Through out the first year of our marriage, we tried to get pregnant all through but nothing happened. I had to come back to home after my one year ended to apply again. while I was here, the pandemic and lock down happened. So, I could not go back to my husband for almost a year.We spoke everyday during the pandemic. Always telling each other that we miss each other. So after the lock down, I have been trying to get back to my husband. I have compiled all my papers and waiting for my husband to send me the necessary documents so I can include them in the application.
Since them, my husband has been giving me one excuse or the other for why he has not sent the documents. He said he has been busy, bla bla. I know his job keeps him busy yes but this his behavior is strange. I just began to get worried that he is not making this a priority. Sometimes, I will even call him and he will not answer.
I became worried and called his elder sister in US. She then told me she will call me back. Last month, she fixed a zoom meeting with me and my husband and it was in that meeting that my husband told me that he has something to confess to me. His voice was shaking. He knelt down and told me he has done something bad and wants me to forgive him.
He said he slept with a coworker during the lockdown and the lady is pregnant. That the lady told him that she was going to remove the pregnancy but he told her no because he has been looking for a baby since we got married. The lady said the only way she will keep the baby is if he will marry her, that she will not have a baby outside wedlock.That he told her he is already married but the lady said that is the only way she will keep the baby. So, that is why he has been avoiding bringing me back to the US. That he loves me and he does not want to let me go but he just wants the woman to have the baby and maybe later they can divorce when the baby is born and then I can come back to join him. I thought he and his sister were pulling my legs cos I just left the meeting and went to cry my eyes out. After several days of calling and me rejecting his call, my husband and I spoke and he still kept begging me. He swears that he will divorce the woman after she gives birth. That he just wants to make sure she keeps his child.
This whole thing makes me want to just end my marriage but I love my husband so much. He now calls me everyday, asking for forgiveness and I want to just try and see his reasoning but his reasoning is so selfish. Just because I have not had a baby in just three years of marriage. Just because I was not around during a pandemic…he has s8x with another woman and has a baby and marries her and he wants me to forgive him?
what kind of wickedness is this? Do I deserve this? My family is divided about this. Some members of my family want me to call it quits while some, want me to remain after all, he is still my husband. My husband wants to come back to Nigeria this summer to beg and make up but I don’t know id I want to see him. I don’t think the pain I feel will ever go away.
I loved and trusted this man. I don’t trust him anymore. I cannot even talk to him even though I love him so dearly. My heart has been shattered in pieces. Of what use is being married? Just to wait that he eventually divorces his US wife maybe in another 2 or 3 years? I really am heartbroken. If you were in my shoes, what will you do? Will you forgive and wait for such a man to divorce the other woman or would you move on? Please advise.

Please seek God's Face. He is the embodiment of Wisdom.

To be honest with you, deep down wants you to stay. I can't write much because this is quite complicated.

And I am very sure you will have Children.

God bless you sister.

I'll take you serious when you take the (M) off your moniker.

. Na wa oh.....Tho I see this as the betrayal of the highest order...BUT...

I love the fact that he's been honest with you after all.......At least not all men will behave more matured like he did,and it clearly shows he Still loves you after coming (cumming) to his senses....But come to think of it,no man is infallible, right? Like we all do make mistakes, right? But so long he has realized his mistakes,I think you should reason with him.....

But saying he'd divorce the other woman immediately after the birth of the child,that one na Mumu talk .

And as for those telling you to leave your marriage,my sister,those are not the kind of pieces of advice you need right now..

I love you already for forgiving him, but i hope you are doing it genuinely and not because of his financial status and location which you wish to be.

Most poor girls are nice and loyal not because they want to but because they are broke, and turn lioness once independent.

Ask yourself this question,
If i were in the States and i am independent will i forgive and stay with him?
If your answer is YES stay, but if NO, you better move on than cause him heart failure in the nearest future.