Hi guys, I need help with my dilemma. My boyfriend of six months and I started having issues in our long-distance relationship about three weeks ago, over his unavailability. Before now we used to talk on the phone every day and/or send each other texts, emails, etc, and basically keep in touch with each other's lives. Then all of a sudden, it stopped. he doesn't call no more, barely replies emails and texts, and rarely answers when I call. I've asked him what's going on, and he swears that he's neither cheating nor wants out, but he just doesn't keep in touch! I've intercepted some suspicious communication between him and two other ladies, but he explained that away, and I believed him.
He's been married before, and had two kids but separated with his partner who was cheating on him, so I think he has very strong feelings against cheating; however, what I want your opinion on is this: Can he be cheating? Is it possible that a guy will love you and not want to talk to you?Am I asking too much in terms of his time?What would you do if you were in my shoes? Please, constructive comments only! Thanx in advance,

Tiki, i have to be straight with you. He is having an affair. Why would a guy who claims he loves you not want to pick your calls? Or suddenly too busyto reply your emails and txts? How many seconds does it take to reply a txt?
The thing is, he is focusing all his undivided attention on his new catch. Its almost always so with distant relationship because he might be feeling you are having an affair wherever you are so why should he be waiting for you? Well, try your best to bring the truth out of him. I'm sorry for your hurt as i really and sincerely understand what you are going through.

LDR jst SUCKS

Posted by: itsme123
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Tiki, i have to be straight with you. He is having an affair. Why would a guy who claims he loves you not want to pick your calls? Or suddenly too busyto reply your emails and txts? How many seconds does it take to reply a txt?
The thing is, he is focusing all his undivided attention on his new catch. Its almost always so with distant relationship because he might be feeling you are having an affair wherever you are so why should he be waiting for you? Well, try your best to bring the truth out of him. I'm sorry for your hurt as i really and sincerely understand what you are going through.

Wowza, that hurt! Thing is he claims that he was upset becoz something had come up about one of my exes who got in touch and was paying me some attention, and he found out. We had spoken abt it and I assured him nothing was up, but apparently he was upset, or at least that's the reason he's giving now. However, I'm not convinced, how then to explain the text messages he's getting from some Uni girl? I stumbled accross those on his phone when I was trying to help him configure it, some girl who claims to want to change from their 'Aristo' relationship or whatever to a stable boyfriend-girlfriend one! He has refused to explain that one, am I just burying my head in the sand?

cheating

@tiki, seriously, a lot of issues might have played it part. basically, distance weighs down a relationship big time buh, are you sure you aint to demanding and making up a lot of assumptions?
i suggest you give him a space and let the caring be reciprocal.

Thanx for all your replies guys.

@md4real, I havn't been too demanding or any of that, true we started very strong, talking everyday for hours via phone, (which I get was quite expensive, especially as he was doing most of the calling), texting endlessly, etc etc so when this was gone I felt quite bereft, and couldn't understand why. However I don't think I've been unreasonable - I've even thought that if the cost is too much we could cut it down to one or two calls a week at pre-arranged times, do more emailing, etc.

Anyway, things are better now, he won't tell me what happened when he went AWOL, just that he was in a bad place which is over now. I took the advice of a few other non-Nairalander friends and just laid my cards on the table, and I think it helped, a lot of the problem was insecurity on both our parts. We working that out now!

Anyways, thanx guys for trying to help, hopefully I don't come back with a sob story, but some good news instead! Have a lovely weekend, y'all,

dont jump to conclusions oooooo

the guy mite be having problems oooo
mite be financial or something else, just let him know he has ur support